Chapter 2: Hypocrite

A/N: Yes, I'm back with an update. I had a bit of writer's block, but now things are coming together again, and I decided to update. Thanks to those who have read and reviewed this story thus far. Your kind words and encouragement have been an inspiration to me. Thanks a million. I hope you enjoy this chapter as well.

Disclaimer: See chapter one.

I woke up not feelin' the best. I'd had a hard night's sleep after Leo had the nightmare, and I kept wakin' up to see if he was okay. Thankfully, he slept for the rest of the night. I knew Mikey was gonna tease me about not havin' enough sleep, but I just didn't care. All that mattered was that Leo was okay and that he made it through the night. As soon as I opened my eyes, I saw that he was awake.

"Wow, you look like hell, Raph," he commented. "Why didn't you sleep?"

I couldn't help but laugh at his remark. Here he was after gettin' his ass kicked by the Foot with bruises all over his body, and he was tellin' me I looked like hell. It was kind of ironic if you ask me. "I look a shell of a lot better than you, bro," I replied.

"True," Leo replied. "Are the others up yet?"

"Not that I know of," I answered. "I woulda heard them."

As if on cue, I heard Mikey come thunderin' down the stairs followed by Don, April, and Casey. Master Splinter came out of the guest room downstairs.

Mikey saw that Leo was up and ran over to him. "How are you feeling, bro?" he asked. I knew he wanted to give Leo one of his famous hugs, but he held himself back probably because of how injured Leo was.

"Sore," Leo answered. "I feel like I got hit by a truck or something."

Don put on his doctor face. "You probably have a lot of bruising, Leo," he said. "After breakfast's over, I'm going to give you a bath and then check your wounds."

I stared at Don. "How the shell are we gonna get him into a bathtub?" I asked. "There's no way he can climb all those stairs. Too bad the downstairs bathroom don't have a tub."

"That's where Casey comes in," April replied. "He's going to go and get a portable bathtub and a first aid kit."

"Wait, I don't get to have breakfast with you guys?" Casey whined.

"You can have some after you get back," April answered.

I could tell Casey wasn't happy about it, but he knew he had to do what April said. She concocted a list of items and had Casey go and get them. While he was gone, April took out a carton of eggs she'd gotten earlier on our way up and began to make egg sandwiches. Mikey wanted to help, but April wouldn't let him. I have to say, those sandwiches were damn good. I never knew April could cook so well. When Casey got back, he had a sandwich too, and I could tell he really liked it.

"Babe, you're awesome in the kitchen," he remarked.

April shot him a glare after he called her babe, but he ignored it.

When breakfast was over, we got the portable tub ready for Leo to use. Then Don and I both helped him off the couch and into it. I could tell he wasn't happy to be bathing like this with all of us around him.

"Do I really have to do this in public?" he asked us.

"For now, yes," Don replied. "Only Raph and I will stay here with you. Could the rest of you please leave now?"

The others nodded and retreated elsewhere. Now, let me tell you, I wasn't happy to be given the task of cleaning my brother. It was the most uncomfortable things I've ever done in my life. Sure, we sometimes bathed together when we were little, but that was different. I really didn't enjoy havin' to wash every nook and cranny while Don held Leo up. I kept givin' Leo apologetic glances every time I had to wash a different body part 'cause I knew he didn't like this any more than I did. Once he was cleaned, we lifted him up and dried him off then put him back on the couch. I gave the all clear, and the others came back. I was waitin' for Mikey to tease me to no end about havin' to bathe our brother, but he didn't say a word, which was a big surprise to me. Usually he'd give any chance he could to embarrass me. Maybe it was the circumstances of what had happened to us or somethin' like that. All I know is Mikey kept his mouth shut, and I was glad of that.

Don examined Leo thoroughly and concluded that Leo's injuries weren't life-threatening. He had a broken left arm, so Don made a sling for it. Most of his injuries were bruises, so Don recommended that he put ice on his injuries every twenty minutes, alternating after twenty minutes on one area. Leo indicated that his ribs hurt the most, so Don put the ice pack there first.

"Well, now that we know the extent of Leonardo's injuries and that he will recover, I believe we need to start our practice sessions again," Master Splinter said.

Mikey groaned. "Sensei, do we have to?" he whined. "I mean, isn't this supposed to be a vacation from that?"

"I wouldn't call this a vacation, Mikey," Leo said sternly. "I would rather be healthy than have what happened to me back in New York. And if we're going to face Shredder again, we need to be on top of our game."

Why was he usin' the word "we" when he was talkin' about this? Did he really think he was gonna practice in the shape he was in?

"Leo, you know you can't practice with us," Don reminded him. "You're in no shape for it yet. Besides, you don't even have your swords, so you can't spar with us."

A look of pain crossed Leo's face at Don's words. I felt so sorry for him, but I knew Don was right. There was no way Leo could train with us yet. He wasn't ready.

"I know that, Don," he said. "I was referring to when I become well enough to train. Nevertheless, you three still need to practice even if I'm not there."

I could tell Leo wanted to come with us. This was his life, and he was dedicated to it. I knew it hurt him to be away from practice. "Look, Leo, maybe I could stay with you today," I suggested. "It won't hurt for me to miss one practice."

"No, Raph, you need to train," Leo insisted. "I'll be fine here, okay? April and Casey will be here and can get me anything if I need it."

I knew when Leo used what I liked to call his leader voice that there was no arguin' with him. Besides, I knew Splinter wouldn't let me skip out on trainin', and if I argued with him, I was liable to get flips as a punishment. So, I nodded and followed the others out to the barn. It was pretty big with a coal stove in one corner. There was also a punchin' bag that was hangin' from a rafter, and I assumed it was Casey's from when he used to come here. That was a good thing for me.

Splinter led us through some warm-up stretches to get our muscles loosened up. He said that we weren't learnin' anythin' new because Leo wasn't here, and he didn't want him to fall behind. I normally would've scoffed at this, but I could understand his thinkin'. Leo was the type who always wanted to be the first to learn somethin', and if he fell behind, he'd get upset. That was just the way he was.

So, we went through all of the katas we'd learned since we first started trainin'. I kept imaginin' that my invisible opponents were the Foot Ninjas who'd attacked my brother. It made me angry to think of them, and my attacks got even more forceful than usual. Splinter noticed this because he called a halt to our practice.

"Raphael, you are not focused," he chastised.

That made me mad. "I am focused, Master," I insisted. "I'm focused on kickin' the shell outta those idiots who attacked Leo."

"Yes, but your anger is clouding your mind, and you are not focused on the flow of the kata," Splinter reminded me. "You must learn to relax your mind, my son."

"I can't!" I yelled. "I can't focus my damn mind!"

Don and Mikey gasped at my outburst, and I had a feelin' I was in for it now. Sensei never allowed us to swear in practice or to yell at him either. I braced myself for the punishment, but Splinter just sighed heavily and placed a paw on my shoulder.

"I understand, my son," he said gently. "This has been a terrible ordeal for all of us. We will leave you here to your thoughts. Perhaps if you empty your mind of these thoughts you will do better tomorrow."

"I couldn't believe what he was sayin'. I wasn't gettin' punished? That had to be a first. I watched as Splinter, Don, and Mikey left the barn. While I was glad I didn't have to do flips, I was still confused by all of this. Why was Splinter bein' lenient with me? Was it just because I'd had a rough night, or was there some other motive to his plan?

Shakin' my head, I began another set of katas, once again picturin' the opponents as the Foot Ninjas. Then I moved to the punchin' bag and kept hittin' it with punches and kicks. It felt good to get the anger out, and I was glad I was takin' my anger out on the bag. I must've been out there for a while because suddenly Casey was there watchin' me beat up on the bag.

"Wow, Raph, you must be pretty pissed," he remarked.

I whirled around and glared at him. "What the shell are you doin' here?" I demanded.

"Leo sent me out to get you," Casey replied. "Splinter said you needed to clear your thoughts or somethin' like that. So, what's eatin' you, Raph?"

"It should be obvious, Casey," I replied. "My brother almost died yesterday."

"Yeah, but he's gonna be fine," Casey responded. "There's no need to get depressed anymore because he's still here."

I sighed. "I know that," I said. "I guess I'm just feelin' guilty about what happened. I feel like it's my fault that he got attacked."

Casey gaped at me. "Your fault?" he repeated. "How do you figure that? You were asleep when he went out, right? It's not like ya sent the Foot after him."

"Yeah, I was asleep instead of goin' out with him," I answered. "That's the problem, Case. I shoulda been there for him instead of slackin' off."

"Raph, it ain't your fault," said Casey. "It just happened. Maybe you should talk to Leo about this and see that he doesn't blame you one bit for what happened to him. Even if you'd gone with him, it could've still happened."

I knew Casey was right, and at that moment, I realized that I was a hypocrite. Last night I'd been tellin' Leo not to blame himself for what happened, and here I was blamin' myself for what happened to him. "You're right, Case," I said. "I'm such a damn hypocrite. Maybe I should talk to Leo about this. He needs to know, and so do the others. Thanks for talkin' to me, Case."

Casey punched me in the shoulder. "Hey, no problem, Raph," he said. "It's the least I can do."

I smiled and followed him out of the barn. I did talk to Leo, and he said he could understand how I felt and that I shouldn't blame myself for what happened. Splinter said the same thing, and I assured him that I'd be better tomorrow. He accepted that and said no more about it. Mikey and Don were just glad to see I was okay, and we all had fun playin' a game of cards.

The rest of the day went by pretty quickly. We watched TV for a little while and even went out and had a snowball fight. We took turns spendin' time with Leo so that he had some company. I felt so much better after unloadin' that burden I'd been carryin' around. I was happier than ever and vowed that I would help Leo with whatever he needed. Don said that tomorrow, Leo was gonna begin his physical therapy so that he could start usin' his muscles again. I could tell Leo was nervous about it, but I reassured him that I'd be there if he needed me.

"Thanks, Raph," he said. "I owe you one."

"Don't mention it, bro," I replied. "It's what I'm here for."

As I settled down to sleep (I decided to sleep where Leo was because I didn't feel like goin' upstairs) I realized that Leo and I were more alike than we ever knew before. Both of us tended to place blame on ourselves when things went wrong, and both of us were very protective of the other. I also realized that as we grew older, both of us weren't as close as we sued to be, but that was changin' now. Maybe it was the prospect of almost losin' my brother that made me see how far apart we'd grown and that now was the time for us to stop takin' our relationship for granted and start bein' thankful that we had each other. I was determined to make sure to always be a better brother and to never take Leo for granted ever again.

A/N: And another chapter is done. So, what did you think of it? In the next chapter we'll begin Leo's physical therapy and his slow journey on the road to recovery. Please feel free to leave a review once you've finished reading. Have a shelltastic day.