Title: Perfect Little Baby
Author: an-alternate-world
Rating: K
Characters/Pairings: Chris
Word count: 1,465
Summary: Fic prompt via Tumblr. If Chris had a baby, just how cute would he be? RPF.
Warnings/Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with Glee, FOX, Ryan Murphy or anything else related to the Glee universe. Nor do I know Chris or Darren and so I hope to God they never see this..

This came via Tumblr:

somewhere-only-glee-knows asked you:

…and you probably didn't see it yet but chris tweeted a picture of a baby and now i need daddy chris drabble, will you write it? I WILL BE ETERNALLY GRATEFUL

He'd never intended to become a father. He'd never expected it. From the earliest times he had learned about how babies were made, he realised it wasn't for him. How could he? He was never going to have sex with a girl and that was that.

And then he'd gotten older and discovered other ways. Adoption was one. IVF was another. But he still hadn't been convinced because he was just like a big child and too busy and easily distracted and he worried about being too absent from his child's life and he would prefer to be out in the world and expressing his adoration for thousands, millions, than have a child at home who barely saw him and felt neglected and perhaps even resented him for it.

Yet then there had been this festering need that had appeared just after he'd turned thirty. He'd seen Lea and Dianna have children and how happy they were and he listened to them babble about how 'complete' their lives felt. He watched Mark chase around after his tottering son, and wondered if maybe being a parent that was a grown child wasn't all that bad. It was like a seed of want had been planted, and every time he had to nod and listen to another story of how Annabella had done this or Max had done that, the words watered the seed until eventually it grew, tangling around his heart. It squeezed when he lay awake at night; it stroked a thorn over his stomach when he saw children at the mall. He began to ache for something he'd always been quite comfortable not having.

So he had started discreetly making enquiries and felt that perhaps adoption was best for him. He didn't really want to wait nine months because he knew he'd freak out and change his mind, and the media would find out and go crazy. And while he had been examining the idea of adoption and reading through pamphlets that would have made Burt Hummel proud, he'd received a call about a little girl who was eighteen months old and had just become an orphan. His heart gave one of those painful clenches and before his brain could come up with a thousand reasons why he should say no and consider the situation more carefully, his mouth was already saying "Yes, of course" and the wheels started turning for Chris Colfer to become a father.

He was interrupted by his musings when he heard her gurgling noises over the intercom, indicating she was awake. He grinned and bounced on the balls of his feet a little because he never got tired of pulling her out of the cot.

"Hey baby girl," he cooed as he entered the room. Her eyes lit up and she smiled brightly, raising her arms above her head automatically to get picked up. He wrapped his arms around her securely before plucking her up, nestling her against his hip. "Did you sleep well?"

She looked at him, blue eyes huge as he tugged down her pyjama shirt and he kissed the soft skin of her forehead that always smelled like musky baby. She giggled, fisting his tee in her hands as he headed into the bathroom to bathe and change her.

He watched her fondly as she splashed in the tub, making elaborate stories and changing his voice with the ducks and boats that floated beside her. She stared in wonderment and then flung water at him. He was momentarily stunned and her face stilled, anxious, before he started laughing and she squealed, smacking her hands into the water.

"You're making quite a mess this morning," he noted, rubbing the spare towel over the floor. "Time to get out?"

Was a baby pouting meant to be so cute and adorable, or was it just his little girl that made his heart swell?

He carefully swaddled her in a fresh fluffy towel, because wet, wriggly baby and bathroom tiles were not a particularly good combination. He rolled his eyes because as soon as he was done drying her fingers, she stuck them in her mouth to suck on.

"You're so silly, you know that?" he smiled. She slapped at his cheek with her saliva-coated hand and he grimaced. "Well, thanks." She clapped her hands together with a cheerful grin and he couldn't help but laugh because honestly she was still the cutest thing he'd ever seen and it was hard to be grumpy when she was so blissfully happy all the time. He shimmied her into fresh clothes and then held her against his hip, bouncing her lightly. She giggled and clutched at his shirt again.

"Breakfast time?" She had no idea what he was saying but she nodded and he nuzzled her cheek, heading downstairs.

It was while he was pretending to talk to her on her fake plastic phone that he was struck by how utterly his life had changed. He'd converted a spare room into her nursery and there were small objects that indicated a child lived here now: a blanket on the floor in the living room, a forgotten doll in the kitchen, a pacifier on his bedside table. He was brought back to paying attention when she stamped her foot.

"Sorry baby, Daddy forgot his mind for a moment," he apologised and she her scowl was quickly replaced with joy as she went back to making babbly noises into her phone, then looking at him expectantly until he responded with either something half-way intelligent or responded in kind with babbly noises.

"You sound ridiculous, you know."

He jumped so high he nearly fell off the sofa. "I didn't hear you come in!"

"I wasn't sure if she was asleep," Darren murmured, eyes shining as Charlotte tottered towards him. He swept her up into his arms and spun her around, and she made a high pitched noise that was pure joy.

"She only woke a few hours ago," Chris said, still struggling to comprehend that not only had he relaxed his convictions about having children but also that he and Darren had gotten together and managed to stay together. Their schedules were wildly different and sometimes they barely saw each other for days. It reminded him a bit of when Idina would bring Walker on-set and Taye Diggs had visited, because the hours that Taye and Walker watched Idina performing were sometimes the only hours they saw her awake. But Darren was always able to cover for Chris if he had a shoot, and Chris was able to adjust his schedule if Darren had a concert. And there was, of course, still plenty of time for the two of them.

"You're such a great father," Chris hummed as Darren sat on the couch beside him. Charlotte snuggled against his chest, listening to his heart beating as he stroked his hand over her back. Ever since she'd first come home with them, it was something she'd done. And Chris couldn't blame her, because his favourite thing to do was press into Darren's body and listen as well.

Darren brushed the soft golden hair of Charlotte's head and kissed it softly. "You're not such a terrible parent either," he teased.

Chris stuck his tongue out and Darren laughed, linking their fingers and tugging Chris into his side. Charlotte had her thumb in her mouth, looking contently into Chris' eyes as he leaned his head against Darren's shoulder.

"I love you," Chris whispered.

"I love you too," Darren replied, carding his fingers through Chris' hair.

"I was talking to the baby."

"Oh," Darren paused. "Well. Some would say I act pretty immature. And I'm short. I could totally be a baby still." He tilted his head and looked down at Charlotte, who mimicked his action. "Alternatively, I'm totally hot and attractive and could be considered a babe."

Chris snorted. "You're so totally ridiculous."

Darren dropped a kiss to his hair and when Chris looked up at him, Darren firmly covered his lips with his own mouth and he shivered as the unspoken passion and need and desire that laced the kiss.

"Love you," Darren said when he pulled back.

"Are you talking to me or the baby?" Chris smirked. Darren poked him and he laughed. "Love you too."

He never would have expected this a decade ago. He'd certainly never planned on it. But it was just so right and wonderful and he had his own little family and he wouldn't give up Charlotte or Darren for anything else in the world.

A/N: D'aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawh. So cute. Thanks for reading.