A few minutes later, after gaining back her sanity, Penny headed towards Leonard and Sheldon's apartment. Sheldon and Leonard were fighting over string theory when Penny knocked and opened the door without an answer.

"Hey, guys." she greeted with her usual pep.

"Oh, hey, Penny! How are you?" Leonard asked politely. Sheldon just sat in his spot, ignoring his two friends chit-chat and wrote on his notepad.

"Not good." Penny answered. She sat down beside Leonard, a seat away from Sheldon. "My mother's coming to visit and I kinda told her a little white lie..."
A grin spread across Leonard's face. "And what was that?" he asked in fake curiosity.

"That I'm dating a super smart american man and he's everyone's dream guy."
Leonard couldn't believe his luck! He could once again be Penny's fake boyfriend, and take advantage of the situation with her mother (much like he did with her father), and again get a lot of PDA in the action.

But Leonard saw another alternative. He wanted to see what would happen if he said no since he was still loyal to Priya. Sure they were friends, but Leonard couldn't help but feel satisfied at the thought of his ex-girlfriend struggling to find a smart boyfriend. Even a fake one. Leonard's grin did not disappear, and he spoke in a smart but very snobby voice.

"Penny, as much as I'd be happy to be your fake boyfriend, I can't because I'm still dating Priya and-"
"Get over yourself, cupid," Penny snapped. "My mother already heard about you before we broke up so I have to find someone she doesn't know about."

Leonard felt like she had just dropped a rock on his head. He mumbled an 'oh' sound and turned his head away.

"I am NOT going with Howard," Penny continued. "And I told my mom that he was american, so I can't go with Raj either."
"Stuck in a tight spot, huh?" Leonard still felt embarrassed, and Penny could tell by his low voice, and his refusing to look her straight in the eyes.

"Yeah, but that's why I came over here..." Leonard immediately shot up. His eyes widened beneath his glasses and he raised his eyebrows. Surely, she wasn't thinking what he thought she was thinking? No one could ever do what he had in mind, he was sure even Amy would lose her mind.

"You weren't thinking... Sheldon, were you?" Leonard asked slowly.

"Well-"
"Absolutely not!" Sheldon interrupted, looking up from his work. Apparently his ears only worked for things he needed to hear. "It's bad enough you accuse Amy Farrah Fowler as being my girlfriend, but Penny is as dumb as rain!" Penny looked offended. "I refuse to take part in your childish activities."
"Come ON, Sheldon!" Penny complained. "It's only for 5 days!" And then she added for insult, "And besides, you'd love my mother. She's stuck up and snooty like you."

Sheldon stared back. No one can really tell what he thinks of insults from Penny, so going into explain this motion would be useless.

"Penny, I am a successful physicist with an IQ of 187, if I were to falsely pose as your boyfriend then my reputation at the university, in addition to with Kripky and my chances of winning a nobel prize will be destroyed."

"Well, when you become my boyfriend you're gonna have to learn not to use such a widened vocabulary." Penny said in annoyance. Sheldon glared. "But seriously. What do I have to do to get you to act?"
Sheldon paused for a moment... What DID he want? Well, to not pretend the blonde was his girlfriend for sure, but something better than that? He didn't really think there was anything that she could give him, really. And anything she could he'd probably rub off as being filthy.

"There's nothing you have that will please me," he said in his usual snobbish voice. "Now if you'll excuse me, I must go back to taking my notes."
Penny thought for a second.

Sheldon + ? = His consent.

Penny hated to admit it, but the killjoy was right. There WAS nothing she could give him. Penny didn't know how to react. She looked at Leonard who looked back at her and shrugged his shoulders, as if to say, you had no chance...

Just then, Raj and Howard entered the room.

"Guess what!" Howard piped. "They're signing Star Trek action figures at the mall! Raj and I were first in line!"

The two (might I add, grown) men held up a figure of Spock and James T. Kirk. A scribbled name was written across the front of their bodies, that seemed to spell out Leonard Nimmoy.

Sheldon, forgetting his past conversation, jumped up in delight.

"Leonard NIMMOY!" he exclaimed gleefully. "I MUST show him my 1988 collection!" He was about to run out when Howard spoke again.

"Hey, Penny, what are you doing here?" he asked. Luckily for Penny, with no pervertedness in hiss voice.

"My mother's visiting," Penny began. "and I have to find a super smart American to date... who is NOT you." she added angrily when a grin spread across Howard's face.

"I'm engaged," he said. The other three knew it was just an excuse.

"I asked Sheldon, but he refuses."

"You asked Sheldon...!" Howard repeated in disbelief. He turned towards his best friend. "What does he have that I don't have?"

"He's not desperate." Leonard muttered under his breath.

Raj whispered something in Howard's ear.

"Oh, you're still angry at him for that?" Howard said to him. Raj nodded in response. "Well, here's your chance! Get your revenge!"

Raj raised his eyebrows and smiled. Sheldon returned, his arms full of Star Trek Merchandise, and tried to exit through the door, but was Raj was blocking his way.
"Move,Koothrapali!" he ordered. "I need to get to Leonard Nimmoy A.S.A.P.." Raj stood still, still grinning.

"Sheldon, I have not taken a bath for two weeks." Sheldon dropped his stuff in fear. Penny and Leonard exchanged glances. "Unless you pretend to be Penny's boyfriend for the next 5 days, I will only take a bath once a month."

Sheldon squinted his eyes after he had finished crying inside. He turned his head sharply to Penny, who stared back in hope.

"... Curse you." he said to her. "I'll do it, but you MUST take a bath!"

Raj nodded. "Certainly."

Sheldon marched out the door, leaving his Star Trek behind him. Obviously fumed at his new role.

"Wait, can Raj talk now?" Penny asked.

"No, no, we had a few drinks at the mall." Howard said, staring at the door.

"So, what did Sheldon do to you, Raj?" Leonard asked.

"Oh, he stole his traditional hat."