Summary: What if the myth never happened, Albion was never united, but remained a torn country and Arthur never rose to initiate the golden age? How did that happen and what can Merlin do to set it right? Kinda angsty. Stay away from this if you suffer from claustrophobia.

Disclaimers: All is BBC's. Save OC Phyllida E. Dewhurst, who is my invention.

A/N: This story is set right between The Sorcerer's Shadow and The Coming of Arthur. Morgana has yet not seized the throne. I'm taking my time here, and if you are impatient by nature, you probably shouldn't read this. If you like, however, really to submerge yourself in a story, please dig in and enjoy yourself. The chapters, apart from the prologue, will be rather long.

TIME AND AGAIN

PROLOGUE

Crystallised

As winter finally released its bone cold grip in the hungry land and its starving people, the days grew longer and the light warmer. The forest floor didn't wait long, but sprouted its eager little windflowers that had so little time to suck up the sunshine before the leaves hungrily closed their window of opportunity, and soon a yellow and white carpet of the beautiful little spring announcers was knitted for young girls to pick and make wreaths of for their golden and brown heads. Beeches, copper and otherwise, were eager to stretch their leaves and soon competed as to being the first to boast their full crowned beauty to the world.

A young man with black hair and a lean face sporting high cheekbones stuck his face out through the window, greeting the sun and the already nosy little sparrows and blue titmice, who never wasted time, but exploded in vivid arias, one trying to outpass the other. The young man bestowed a wide smile on the little birds and sent a longing glance at a beautiful and lithe young girl, who had no qualms of returning his flirting approach.

Spring was here, and like everybody else, Merlin felt its attractions and temptations. As he pulled his head back with the rueful sigh that another work day was looming over his head, his eye caught the shape of Lady Morgana, who strode past the city walls of Camelot. Merlin stuck out his head again, straining his neck to follow the form that so quickly vanished round the corner, evidently trying not to be seen. It wasn't the first time he had seen the lady coming home late from nightly excursions. He just wished he knew where she had been. Now and then he had succeeded in following her, yet usually losing the trail after a while. His kind mentor and protector, Caius, had warned him about being so keen on stalking the lady; the young warlock had no one to back him up and if he was caught by some scheme by Morgana, there would be nobody to help him.

Merlin knew that, of course. In an ideal world, Prince Arthur would know his secret and watch his back, just as he, in hiding, was watching his. But this was not a perfect world, and King Uther's cruel laws about magic forced him to work in secrecy and keep his gift hidden.

Basically, thus, Merlin was on his own.

"How about something to eat?" Gaius cried after him as he saw the backside of his apprentice disappear through the door.

"I'm late!" Merlin yelled back and took the hallway in three steps. Again! thought Gaius. This boy would be late for his funeral.

"You're late!" Prince Arthur concluded, "...again!"

"I'm sorry," Merlin huffed, ripping the curtains aside and starting his 'rise and shine' until the prince threw something at him that he ducked easily. Nothing had changed over night, and why should it?

Arthur's breakfast was a little burned, but still his manservant's belly couldn't keep still when he served the food for him.

Growl!

"Merlin!" said Arthur, annoyed, "one thing is that you serve me burned food, another is that you won't let me eat it, at least, in peace!"
"I'm sorry," Merlin said, "I really can't help it." And as emphasis, his stomach growled again, this time louder. "Merlin!"
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry – I'll go now."
"You'll do no such thing. I have several chores for you."
"The-en, you'll have to bear my belly growling. I really can't do anything to alleviate it." After which statement, his stomach growled even louder for effect.
"What's wrong with you?"
"No breakfast this morning."
Arthur scoffed and leaned back, his expression one of vexation. "For heaven's sake. Go, then – and have some breakfast in the castle kitchen. And don't bloody well come back until your stomach is absolutely mute."

The prince didn't have to say that twice. His manservant instantly scooted out the door and proceeded down the hallway, fully intending to go to the kitchen when suddenly he caught a glimpse of Morgana … going out again.

That was strange... He had just witnessed her return from some nightly activity and now she was going out again? Merlin immediately changed direction and silently started to follow the sorceress.

Having completely forgotten about his starving stomach, the young warlock continued to stalk the King's ward, who proceeded to leave the castle, wearing a brown, nondescript cape as opposed to the brilliantly blue she usually favoured. Clearly, she was undercover.

Outside, the day was already busy, merchants, shoppers, travellers and others hurrying by, hardly even noticing the tall, caped woman, who kept to the shadows even on this beautiful sunny day. When she came to the town wall, she quickly stepped round a corner and entered an alley that was devoid of both people and shops. Merlin thought he knew every inch, corner and pebble of Camelot, but this place was new to him. At the end of the alley, a tall wooden fence blocked for passage and the young sorcerer bent down behind a barrel to see where Morgana's intentions would take her and how she would go on from here. To his great surprise, she fingered a plank in the fence that accommodatingly gave way and let her through. Somebody had prepared the way for her, for Merlin was confident that she hadn't loosened that plank herself.

After a few seconds, he followed suit, being particularly careful, not having forgotten what happened the last time he followed after Morgana into the woods. He rubbed his neck; he could still feel where the serket had stung him.

At first, he had lost track of the swift lady, however by sending out a mute spell, he extended his hearing and eventually caught her light footsteps going west. Carefully he followed, stopping now and then to extend (literally) his ears, looking back to ensure that nobody followed him. Two hours later, he finally heard her slow down and eventually stop. As he stopped also, he took time to scrutinise his surroundings and that's when he realised with a gasp.

He'd been there before.

However, not with Morgana – with Arthur; Merlin concentrated as he threw back his memory. They were running, fleeing. Ruffians were coming and attacking them from all directions, and they kept coming. Arrows. Arthur was hurt! And that's when it hit him like the arrow that had hit his prince. This was the area where the crystal cave was situated!

x

"Gaius, have you seen Merlin?"

Before the court physician stood a very angry prince. Gaius cocked an eyebrow.

"No, not since this morning? What has he done?"

Arthur leaned forward, his fists on his hips.

"What's he done? It's not what he has done – it's what he hasn't done!"

"What do you mean, Sire?"

"Soft-hearted and generous as I am, I gave him leave to get some breakfast in the castle kitchen before he was to return and do some chores for me. And what happens?"

Arthur made a break for effect, yet procrastinated perhaps a little too long.

"I don't know, Sire, what did happen?"

"Oh … erm, he never returned!"

Gaius' brow furrowed. "That's not like Merlin," he murmured.

Arthur noticed, suddenly, that the old man's concern was real. "So .. you haven't seen him?"

"No," Gaius said, hesitantly, "and it has been .. how long?"

"Three hours," Arthur said, his anger now utterly evaporated.

x

Trying very hard to look like a trunk, the young warlock moved from tree to tree, closing in on the Crystal Cave. Extending his ears again, he could now hear Morgana's voice, which meant, of course, that she was talking to someone. As he steadily and stealthily moved closer, he was almost certain that that someone was Morgause, which was no surprise to him. Evidently the two sisters kept having these meetings in the forest; never before, however, had he encountered them during daytime – or in this specific area. Merlin held his breath. He was finally by the cave.

As the warlock crept along the cave wall, one careful step at a time, the voices grew gradually louder and the display of emotion was easier to interpret. Morgause sounded frustrated, her sister less so, though trying to calm the blonde sorceress down. One step more and Merlin was forced to crouch behind a rock to avoid detection. The lanky lad swiftly bent down, doing his best to still his breath and his hammering heart. Yes, there they were, among all the glittering crystals that instantly disturbed Merlin's eyes with all their moving images. He shut his eyes tight, refusing to let himself be drawn in by them, and resorted to listening instead.

"... patience, sister. You will learn by time, I am sure of it."
"I need to learn now! Damn it. Why won't these blasted crystals talk to me!"

Morgana looked closely at one of the crystal stalactites. "I remember that Alvarr was very keen to get the one that was secured underneath the castle. He hoped that Mordred, the druid boy, would be able to wield it."

"Perhaps by time, the boy will be powerful enough, who knows. But we need to know now, sister." Morgana's half sister turned round to look at yet another transparent crystal. "Why can't I know this out," she murmured.

"I do not understand what you anticipate they will do," Morgana said, "when I look at them, I see various colours, winking at me as they are reflected by objects nearby, but that is all."
"Your magic is not yet strong enough," Morgause stated, his voice still hard with disappointment, yet perhaps with our joined effort ..."

She turned to Morgana and grabbed her hands. "Perhaps we can do it. If we concentrate hard and long enough, we may be able to break the secret of the crystals. Get ready, sister, throw your mind into our mutual pool of magic and repeated after me ..."

GROWL.

"What was that?"

Behind his rock, Merlin grimaced with vexation. Oh no. His blasted stomach. Still, if he kept perfectly still, they might just ignore …. Groooooowwwwlll.

Bother!

"Who is there? Come out!" Morgause boomed, raising her hands into magic position. Merlin bit his lip. Perhaps he could make a run for it? He certainly didn't fancy the serkets again. And this time for sure the dragon wouldn't be able to help him, its size being incapable of squeezing through the cave entrance. No, running would probably be the wisest action. After all, he was here on his own – nobody had his back.

However, before he even had a chance, his shielding rock mysteriously disappeared into thin air and his crouching form sat face to face with Morgause's vengeful face.

Morgana gasped. "You!"

"Me," Merlin admitted lamely. "Beautiful place you have here."

With a roar of annoyance, Morgause threw the skinny manservant's body into the air where it connected with the rock surface from whence he slid down like a rag doll, every part of him hurting.

"You have spied on us for the last time!" Morgause said, furious, taking her sister's hand while still showering Merlin with spells with the other. "I will not make the same mistake twice, though I cannot for the death of me grasp how you got out of that one."

And without further ado and without Merlin ever having a chance to eel himself out of this catastrophe, the two sisters chanted as one and sent spell after spell towards the thin boy's body that instantly started to convulse.

I must do something about this! Can't hide my magic any more! If I do, I will die here!

But he couldn't breathe, couldn't think and slowly an icy feeling crept up his legs and proceeded up his spine. Already he was unable to move hos body but his eyes that he rolled downwards to discover that the entire lower part of his body was encapsulated in … was it crystal?

Another spell from Morgause hit him right on the jaw that jerked up as if he had had an uppercut and he felt how whatever was encasing him now moved up and covered his torso.

NO! This could not be right! This was not his destiny!

Ásvège afol Merlin bebyrge cwic

And this last enchantment did it. Merlin felt every breath forced out of his lungs, his muscles frozen and his brain dulled. With one last effort, he managed to open his eyes, but was unable to blink. What he saw made a wave of icy and intense shock travel through his spine and to his heart. The two sisters were hazy images through the crystal surface, both of them smirking, and round them were hundreds of moving visions. And he could not close his eyes.

Had he had breath, he would have screamed.

xxx

Oyoyoyoy – how is Merlin getting out of this one? Sorry for this cliffie – couldn't be otherwise, I'm afraid. ;)
Tell me, please – should I continue?