Operation Fifteen

Why Can't I Say It?

"Has Iroha always been this mean?" Rion wondered with a pout on her lips as she watched Iroha's escape. Rin looked to the girl the moe-loid was clinging onto rather than Rion herself, though. She was more worried about Gumi's reaction, but Gumi didn't seem to have any opinion on the current situation. It bothered Rin how many similarities she was beginning to notice between Gumi and that horrible Piko, but it was no doubt that the silver-haired boy would rub off on her considering the amount of time the two spent together.

"Iroha's not the one who's being mean here," Ring stated casually, leaning back in her chair with a disinterest similar to Gumi's. Rin wished they'd show more affection toward Iroha. She'd been a fellow club member for the longest time now and Gumi's possible love interest for even longer than that.

Neru's eyes sparked with a challenge as she growled to Ring, "Are you saying I'm at fault here?"

"Well, you are for rejecting a perfectly valid plan," Ring pointed out, and Aoki's cheeks flushed red as Neru's glare flickered to her for a moment before returning to Ring despite the bluette's lack of attempt to even glance at the club leader. "I didn't mean you, though."

"Who, then?" Rin dared to ask, her curiosity getting the better of her. She knew this could easily lead to a fight, and she knew it was probably wiser to ask Ring to be quiet so that no one else fought, but she couldn't see Ring as pinning Rion as someone cruel. Rion didn't intend to hurt anyone, after all. The Vocaloid didn't even realize that Iroha and Gumi were meant to be together.

"Gumi, obviously."

She said it so nonchalantly that Rin flinched. It was too blunt. Couldn't she have sugar-coated it a little? Rin looked to Gumi to see the greenette's reaction and was startled to see a grim smile on Gumi's face.

"All's fair in love and war," was all she responded, causing Rion's face to contort in concerned confusion.

"Gumi?" the girl asked tentatively, gently tugging on Gumi's sleeve, but Gumi seemed to have lost all capability of looking at girlfriend and kept her eyes now glued to her Blackberry instead.

Rin looked to Miki as she felt the girl stir beside her. At Rin's inquisitive gaze, Miki murmured, "I'm going to go catch up to Iroha and see if she's okay."

Rin stopped her though, grabbing onto her friend's sleeve and shaking her head. Miki looked at her in confusion, and Rin struggled to find the words she desired. You can't go, she wanted to say. Not after what happened when Piko screwed with your system. Iroha thinks you hate her, so seeing you will just make her sadder and she'll run away from you.

"I'll go do it," was all Rin said in the end. It wasn't Miki's fault that she and Iroha were fighting, and Rin didn't want to remind her of that happening, at least not now. Not only that, Iroha had another matter at hand to deal with. Miki and Iroha could sort things out later.

Miki looking at her with subdued confusion but allowed the blonde to take her place. Rin nodded a farewell to Neru, who stared heavily at her as she walked away. She knew Neru would be mad at her for leaving the club early once again, but, sometimes, friends were more important. Iroha needed her right now; Neru didn't.

It took quite a while to find Iroha considering she wasn't in any of her usual places. In fact, she wouldn't even have found her in the first place if it weren't for the odd fact that she could hear the sounds of a television playing from Ring's room, and, knowing that not only did Ring rarely watch television but she also was still in the clubroom, she decided to go check it out.

Iroha had curled herself up in Ring's sheets on top of the other Vocaloid's bed. Her eyes were teary as she gazed at the television, but her far-off gaze assured Rin that the kittyler wasn't paying any mind to the anime on the screen whatsoever. She'd left the door open just a crack, so she noticed the movement of it opening in the corner of her eye and perked up to look toward the opening. She sank a bit when she saw Rin. She must have been expecting the tenant to return.

"Hey," Iroha murmured tiredly, offering the faintest trace of a welcoming smile.

"Hi," Rin returned with a gentle smile of her own, softly closing the door behind her and stepping into Ring's room. Iroha turned her gaze back to the television, making it clear that she didn't want to talk, so Rin decided to take a seat beside her friend and quietly gaze around Ring's room. This room didn't hold any happy memories for Rin. She'd only been here once before, and she'd wound up upsetting Ring that one time.

"I'll never be anything more than what I am right now, Rin, and I know that. I came to terms with that long ago."

What had Ring meant by those words? What was she now? What did she want to be? Why wasn't she fighting for that?

She chased those thoughts away, though, because now wasn't the time for them. Instead, she pushed forward with Iroha. Yes, Iroha didn't want to talk, but that didn't change the fact that she needed to. She was hurt, heartbroken, and if she kept it all bottled inside, it would tear her to pieces.

"Iroha, about Rion and Gumi—"

Rin wasn't able to get any further, because Iroha cut her off there with a fake smile and said, "Hey, did you hear what Lily did?" Iroha scowled, a look of frustration on her face, and ranted, "She started going out with that Mew chick. Even though she knew that Aoki's totally into her. Didn't even have the heart to tell Aoki about it. She just showed up one day with Mew. All that time, she let Aoki love her. She let Aoki believe that, somewhere in her heart, Lily loved her too. Then she just pulled this random chick out of nowhere, without a word to Aoki, and tossed her aside. Isn't that just too cruel?" Iroha's voice broke unsteadily there, and Rin saw that Iroha's gaze was overcome with tears. Iroha forced a smirk on her face and looked to Rin, her friend's brows creasing in heartache as she saw the pain in Iroha's eyes. "Isn't that just way too cruel?" Her smile was breaking now. Her tears had begun to spring loose. "It's just too cruel, isn't it? Aoki loved her. Lily was supposed to love her, too." She wiped her arms roughly off her face to clear away new tears and make from for new ones, trying to keep that wavering smirk on her face. "She's so cruel, Rin. How could she do that?" She was hiccupping now, and her smile had all but vanished. "I love her, Rin. Why doesn't she love me too?"

"Iroha," was all that Rin could manage to get out. She had no clue what to say or do, because nothing could make this better. She couldn't do anything for her friend as Iroha gave up on speaking and broke into sobs against Rin's chest. She pet her friend's back and held her close at the kittyler broke into pieces in her arms, but there was absolutely nothing she could do to help her. She'd never felt so completely useless before.

. . .

"No way, Amane and Nagisa would be a terrible couple!" Iroha was shouting at Rin in the hallways days later as they were making their way to kitchen to prepare more popcorn for their latest Strawberry Panic! marathon.

"Shizuma is terrible for her, though," argued Rin, irritated by Iroha's insistence on only shipping canon couples. "Amane is so much kinder!"

"They don't even make sense together, Rin!" snapped Iroha, glaring at Rin. Sparks of rivalry were flaring in the air between them, as they always did when they two argued over pairings. "Shizuma and Nagisa are meant to be!"

"I personally like Tamao and Nagisa."

It wasn't one of the two that had said that, so Iroha and Rin paused in their walking, growing tense as Rion's tentative voice sounded from the path ahead of them. Rin gazed at Iroha worriedly after seeing the greenette that Rion was always attached to. Gumi's eyes were locked on her Blackberry, as usual, and Iroha's eyes had fallen to the floor.

Iroha gently grabbed Rin's hand and quietly murmured, "Let's go, Rin."

Rin looked to Gumi and Rion for a moment as Iroha began to lead her. However, she didn't have long to look back, because anger had sparked in Gumi's eyes and she lunged forward. Rin found herself being yanked out of Iroha's grasp. Instead, Gumi took her place, grabbing Iroha by the shoulders and forcing the other girl to look at her. Iroha glared viciously at Gumi, violent tears shining in her eyes, and snapped, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"You're just going to run away? Don't I mean anything to you at all?" Gumi snapped in return, narrowing her eyes back at the kittyler.

"You mean anything to me?" Iroha wondered incredulously, trying desperately to pull away from Gumi, but the other Vocaloid appeared to be much stronger than the coral-haired girl. "How about what I mean to you? I was supposed to be the one you fell in love with! I was supposed to mean the most to you! I always thought that, someday, you'd give up and finally be with me! But, no, you didn't even try! You just jumped on the first Vocaloid to like you even a little! You're not fair, Gumi! I waited for you to tell me you loved me, or to say that you knew I loved you, but you never did! You're supposed to know me better than anyone! You're supposed to know that I can't say things out loud! You're supposed to know that I can't be straightforward! You're supposed to love me, not her!"

"If you really loved me, you'd be willing to tell me! You wouldn't shout at me when I'm nice to you, you wouldn't run away from me when I've done something you don't like! You wouldn't join some stupid club just to see if I'd join it too! You'd do your best to be honest with me if you loved me, but considering you never even said that word once to me before now, obviously, you don't!"

"That's unfair!" Iroha argued, her anger rising higher. "Why would I have to say it? You're the brave one! You're the one who's always ready to try something new or to make a mistake! I'm too scared, Gumi! I'm scared to tell you and have you reject me! I'm scared of you deciding it's not worth it!"

"Well you know what, Iroha? Maybe I didn't tell you because I was just as scared as you!" Iroha froze at that statement, and Gumi looked away, dissipating anger shining in her eyes. She released Iroha and turned her glare elsewhere, muttering, "Whatever, Iroha. I'm done."

Without another word, Gumi turned her back on Iroha and the two witnesses and began to walk away. Rin stayed absolutely frozen, unsure what to do in this situation. Iroha was still stuck where she was, staring at where Gumi had been seconds before, and Rion watched the greenette's back as Gumi walked briskly down the hallway, her expression damp with a subdued sadness, as though she'd been prepared for this day all along. It seemed as if nothing was ever going to change aside from Gumi's receding figure. Rin couldn't move an inch.

Then, Iroha made a dash for it. Rin watched in awe as Iroha gathered all the courage she possessed, grabbed Gumi from behind, and forced her to face her. Before Rin could fully comprehend what had just happened, Iroha had pushed her face up to Gumi's and forced a kiss on the other girl, reaching up on the tips of her toes, and then lowered herself slowly down. Finally, with a determined gaze locked on Gumi's shocked one, Iroha spoke the three words that had yet to be said between the two.

"I love you."