So you can thank my local pumpkin farm for this little (and slightly ridiculous but infinitely cute and hilarious) plot bunny. Who knew corn mazes could be so much fun? The Yu-Gi-Oh crew sure didn't. Now, without further ado... enjoy ^^

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh

Mazed and Confused

o-o-o

"It's so big!" squealed Ryou, hands clasped beneath his chin and practically bouncing with anticipation. He radiated excitement. And of his group, he was the only one to do so.

"What are you? Five?" snapped Ryou's twin, Bakura, eyeing his brother with disdain. The kid had tied his long white hair back for the occasion. He looked like a freaking girl. And Bakura honestly wanted nothing to do with him. Or this immense corn maze Ryou had dragged them all too. He crossed his arms over his chest and sneered as yet another group of small children traipsed by and into the maze. He so did not want to be here.

But he didn't say so. Not because he was worried about hurting Ryou's feelings, but because Mariku had overheard Ryou talking about this little excursion to the pumpkin farm and immediately wanted in. Although, Bakura noted with a disgusted scowl, wanted in was a very loose term. He was sure Mariku could care less about this corn maze. What he wanted into was Ryou's pants.

Of course Ryou, oblivious as he was, knew nothing of this. So when the Egyptian had all but begged that he and his younger brother could come along Ryou immediately consented.

Now Bakura was stuck holding his tongue to avoid getting the crap kicked out of him.

And apparently babysitting Mariku's brother, Malik, as well.

"How 'bout we split up into teams?" suggested Mariku. He was trying very hard to sound excited. And he was failing miserably.

Which Malik had no problem pointing out. "Why did we come to this stupid place anyway?" complained the slightly younger teen. "We're the only ones here that have even hit puberty."

"Could have fooled me," said Bakura, smirking at the younger Egyptian, who flushed furiously and opened his mouth to retaliate.

But he didn't get a chance to. "What? Afraid you'll lose to me and Ryou?" goaded Mariku, sidling closer to the boy in question. Although said boy was paying no attention whatsoever to their less-than-nice conversation.

"You and me…" echoed Ryou, turning back to the group, "Oh you mean teams!" he exclaimed excitedly. "That's a great idea Mariku!"

Mariku beamed stupidly at the smaller teen.

"Great idea Mariku!" mocked Bakura.

"I think somebody's chicken," shot back Mariku.

Bakura glared. "I am not," he said curtly, "I just don't like the idea of sending my brother off alone with you."

"Why?" asked Ryou, brows knitted.

He didn't understand and Bakura wasn't about to explain it to him. "Nothing, Ryou."

o-o-o

"Why the fuck did I let them talk me into this?" muttered Bakura to himself as he trudged into the maze. Of course, as he was not alone, this got him an unwanted response.

"Yeah why?" echoed Malik from somewhere behind him. "I am so not dressed for a freaking corn maze."

He spun on his heel to face the other teen. "That's your own damn fault for wearing leather," snapped Bakura, eyeing his leather-clad legs and midriff-bared torso beneath his lavender cut-off hoodie. He couldn't suppress the scowl that bubbled to his lips as he couldn't help but notice the Egyptian's tan practically glowing in the sunlight. "Why the hell are you even here?"

"Why are you?"

"You think I'd let Ryou come here alone?" questioned Bakura with exaggerated astonishment.

"He's not alone," pointed out Malik, "He has Mariku."

"I rest my case," said Bakura with finality and Malik shrugged his acknowledgement of the truth in that statement. "So why are you here?"

Malik quickly looked down, avoiding the other teen's eyes. "Mariku asked me to come," he said with absolutely no conviction whatsoever.

Bakura didn't know what was the deal there, but he really just didn't care. What he did care about was losing to his brother and his pervert boyfriend wannabe. "We need a plan," said Bakura.

Malik looked very relieved at the change of subject. He nodded enthusiastically. "We need to get to the three checkpoints and then to the bell tower at the end before them right? So I guess we'll just have to move quickly-"

Bakura cut him off with a wave of his hand. "That implies that we are leaving this up to skill. Playing fairly is something I, for one, will not stand for. So, what's our plan?"

Malik looked at him in surprise for a moment, before grinning, his lilac eyes alight. Bakura smirked at his lack of contempt for playing dirty. This looked like it could be the start of a very beautiful friendship.

o-o-o

"Oh Mariku, this is going to be so much fun!" exclaimed Ryou as he frolicked down a path, Mariku following afterward. The smaller teen stopped abruptly as he reached an intersection. "Which way do you think we should go?" he asked sweetly, turning to face the Egyptian.

Mariku blinked at the sudden appearance of Ryou's chocolate eyes (and conversely the disappearance of his ass, which Mariku had been watching far more than any path they had taken thus far in this corn maze). "Umm…" he stalled. Yup, Ryou's butt had definitely taken up precedence over the maze. He had no idea where they had been or where they were going. "Why don't you choose?"

"Are you sure?" asked Ryou, eyes practically shining excitement. It was damn cute and all Mariku could do in response was nod absently and hope his grin wasn't too wide. Mariku made a general habit of not grinning, although for Ryou, he guessed he could make a slight exception. "Okay, then let's go this way."

And with that, Ryou turned and trotted down the left path, Mariku in tow.

o-o-o

This was all so stupid. That was what Malik had decided after another three guessed pathways that got them nowhere. They were supposed to be messing with his brother and his brother's latest crush, but all they had done so far was gotten lost.

"Hey," called Malik, "when are we actually, you know, gonna do something?" Malik paused to let Bakura respond. He didn't, so Malik looked down, acutely aware of his poor aching toes and added, "My feet hurt like hell. These boots were not made for walking through some Ra-damned ma-"

Thwack!

Malik stopped suddenly as he got a face-full of thick and leafy cornstalk. He brought a hand up to his probably now bruised nose and glared at the white-haired teen. "What the hell, Bakura!"

Bakura stood with a scowl, arms crossed over his chest, opposite Malik. He didn't look guilty at all, but he wasn't innocent either. He just didn't care. Which was why his only response was "Whenever you're ready to man up and stop complaining about your clothes, I know and will be willing to tell you how we are going to screw with our brothers."

Malik glared for a moment longer, but knew better than to expect an apology from the Thief King. He sighed loudly and asked wearily, "What's the plan?"

Bakura smirked in acknowledgement of Malik's choice and pulled a crumpled piece of paper from his pocket. "This is a map," said Bakura.

Malik raised his eyebrows. "Very good Bakura," mocked the Egyptian, "Now we can out of this Ra-forsaken place-"

Thawck!

"Stop that!" yelled Malik angrily at the white-haired teen that had yet again pulled back a stalk only to hit him with it.

"Stop being stupid," said Bakura. "This is for Mariku and Ryou. I've messed with this map. Anyone who uses this will end up way more lost than they started."

"So devious," said Malik, sounding bored, before flinching as Bakura pulled back the branch yet again.

But he didn't let it go, instead opting to twist its leaves around his fingers. "Add the frustration of being hopelessly lost to the guilt Ryou will feel for cheating and the tension Mariku will have created from stealing this thing…" He trailed off grinning.

Malik couldn't help but grin as well, knowing that his brother was hopelessly enough in love with Ryou that the white-haired teen being at all upset with him would be devastating. And anyone who had spent more than a moment talking to Ryou knew that his goody-goody nature would eat him alive. Mind-fucking for the win.

"I approve," said Malik, "But how are we gonna get Mariku to steal that map."

"I've got this covered," said Bakura with a grin, "Now I just need a child…"

"A what-"

Thwack!

"OW! Cut that out!" Malik was sure his nose was going to become permanently black and blue.

Bakura just laughed and kept walking.

o-o-o

"Mariku! Put that child down!" yelled Ryou, horrified. He had turned at the next intersection they had reached to see Mariku a little ways back holding a child up by the collar. Even from this distance he could see the silent tears running down the kid's face. He couldn't have been more than six.

Although from the look on Mariku's face when Ryou yelled at him, you would have thought that the Egyptian was the six-year-old. He quickly dropped the kid who quickly got to his feet and scampered off. Ryou was sure he heard the kid whimpering.

He frowned and walked up to Mariku. "What do you think you were doing?" he asked incredulously.

Mariku took on a look that very much resembled a child being scolded and said, "I just wanted to help…"

Ryou raised an eyebrow at him, but couldn't stay mad. Especially when Mariku looked down at him with that small pout and large purple eyes. "Why?" was all he could ask.

Mariku looked down and scuffed his boot around in the dirt, while quickly moving his hands behind his back. Too quickly.

Ryou darted around to the side far more quickly than Mariku could realize what was going on and snatched the paper he was trying to hide right out of his hand, before turning his back on the Egyptian teen and unfolding it. And what he saw made his heart fall. He let the paper fall to the ground, feeling a bit numb.

"Uh, Ryou…" he heard Mariku say, placing a light hand on his shoulder, "Are you okay…?"

Ryou blinked, a single tear sliding down his cheek, before burying his face in his hands and crying, "I'm a cheater!"

o-o-o

"Umm…" Mariku honestly had no idea what to say to that. On the one hand, he had somehow gotten out of that whole map and child snatching debacle without making Ryou upset with him. But now the smaller teen was hyperventilating. Over seeing a Ra-damned map of the maze.

What the hell was Mariku supposed to do about that?

He decided on awkwardly comforting the other teen with a gentle hand on his shoulder. And the thrill that ran through his body at the touch forced Mariku to use all of his willpower not to jump the smaller teen right then and there.

The suppression of this urge was not helped at all when Ryou turned and dove into the Egyptian's chest, blubbering about not wanting to be a cheater – a sentiment not at all shared by Mariku.

But, as seeing Ryou cry was not something he was particularly fond of, Mariku suggested, "Why don't you just let me choose the paths? I didn't see the map so it wouldn't be cheating."

Ryou pulled back and looked up the Egyptian with watery chocolate eyes. "Really? You would do that for me?"

Mariku didn't see at all why this was a big deal, but he replied nonetheless, "I would do anything for you Ryou."

"Thank you Mariku!" cried the smaller teen, hugging the larger tightly, before pulling free and wiping his eyes. Within moments all traces of his former sadness were gone and his old excitement was back. "Okay, which way, Mariku?"

"Uh, left?" answered Mariku and he watched Ryou bound off excitedly in that direction.

Mariku decided that he really did not understand that boy, but he was pretty sure he was one step closer to getting into Ryou's pants, and that was good enough for him.

o-o-o

"Well that backfired," complained Malik loudly.

Bakura shot him a scathing look before turning back to watch his brother and Mariku through the cornstalk wall. He exhaled deeply before saying in a calm voice, "Do you have a better plan in mind?"

"As a matter of fact, I do."

Bakura turned back to the other teen, eyebrows raised as if to say Let me hear it.

"Why don't we just remove the check points," said Malik with a smirk to rival Bakura's. "Ra knows your brother won't leave until he finds them all, and Ra knows my brother will get pissed as hell when Ryou pays more attention to the maze than him. It's foolproof."

Malik grinned at Bakura, obviously expecting the other teen's approval. What he was probably not expecting was for Bakura to exhale an appraising "Genius" and then lean forward and kiss the unsuspecting Egyptian. Bakura had not been expecting to do that either.

Which was why, when Bakura pulled back quickly and saw the other teen's flushed and equally as surprised face, he quickly turned and strode onward. Ignoring the incident all together. That was how Bakura dealt with things.

"Coming?" he called back to Malik before turning a corner in search of the first checkpoint.

"Y-yes!" called Malik. He couldn't help but smirk as he noticed the Egyptian's voice crack. As unplanned as the kiss was he could still be smug if he wanted to.

o-o-o

Malik was in shock. Yep, he was pretty sure that's what this was. His crush – the only reason he had come on this stupid excursion in the first place – had just kissed him. And then walked away.

What the hell was he supposed to make of that?

And what the hell was he supposed to do now?

"Hey wait up!" he called, running to catch up to Bakura, relieved that at least this time, his voice had refrained from cracking.

After Ra knew how long of walking in silence, Bakura finally broke it. "We're getting nowhere," he stated plainly.

Malik didn't point out that that was true on multiple levels. Instead he said in as neutral a voice that he could muster, "So what do you suggest we do?"

Bakura looked thoughtful for a moment before grabbing Malik by the wrist and pulling him off the path. "Bakura!" exclaimed Malik, "What the frick are you doing?"

"Cheating," replied Bakura gruffly, before stopping so short that Malik nearly walked right into him.

He managed to stop himself just in time and looked over Bakura's shoulder to find out what caused the near collision. He immediately wished he hadn't. "Oh. My. Ra."

Joey. And Kaiba. And… Oh my Ra… Malik was pretty sure he'd never look at those two the same way again. Actually he was pretty sure he would never look at them again period. Oh my Ra…

Without a word, Bakura took his arm and pulled him back out of the cornstalks and on to the path, where they both stood in silence for a moment. "Now, I bet that kiss seems like nothing," mused Bakura after a while.

Malik could only nod meekly. "I think I may be scarred for life," he said meeting Bakura's eyes.

Bakura nodded this time and for a moment he was lost in thought. Finally he exclaimed, "Fuck this. Wanna get out of here?"

"Yes," was Malik's only reply.

And with that Bakura grabbed his hand and pulled him to where (he assumed) was the exit, grumbling the whole time under his breath, "No class whatsoever. A corn field? I mean get a room… or a car…" Malik couldn't help but notice the glint Bakura got in his eye when he said car, or the way he onced-over Malik like he was something to eat. He also wasn't sure that he really minded.

"…So your car?" said Malik after a moment.

Bakura's trademark smirk was all the answer he needed.

o-o-o

"I think we're almost at the end Mariku!" said Ryou excitedly.

"Hmm," replied Mariku, only half paying attention to what was going on around him. Ever since he had comforted Ryou, the smaller teen had taken to holding his hand as they made their way to the checkpoints and through the maze. He couldn't really care less about where they were.

That was, until he realized what Ryou actually said.

"So were almost done?" echoed Mariku coming to a halt and consequently stopping Ryou along with him.

"…Yes," said Ryou, obviously a little confused as to what was the hold up.

But Mariku was far from noticing. What he was noticing was that he and Ryou were almost out of this maze they had not made out yet. They hadn't even kissed. That was unacceptable.

So Mariku decided to do something about it. Something in typical, blunt, Mariku fashion.

Without a word, he whirled on the smaller teen, wrapping his arms around Ryou's waist and pulling him into a kiss. Ryou, obviously surprised by this sudden outburst, opened his mouth in a gasp, which only served in allowing Mariku's tongue access to his mouth. Access which the Egyptian quickly took advantage of.

It didn't take long, Mariku half-noticed, for Ryou to get over his shock and submit himself to Mariku willingly. It also didn't take long for Mariku to take advantage of this, pushing Ryou back, off the path to slightly more… private quarters.

Mariku grinned against Ryou's lips as the smaller let out a soft moan. This whole corn maze business was a lot more fun than he thought it was going to be.

o-o-o

Oh my. Oh my. Oh my. Markiu was kissing him. Mariku was kissing him. Mariku was kissing him. And Ryou was standing there like a shell-shocked idiot

Ryou had never been one for making out. He had never been one for kissing, but he guessed that was mostly from lack of being kissed, as because with every fiber of his being he wanted Mariku. He wanted the Egyptian's tongue in his mouth and hands on his body.

Oh my… he really wanted him.

So much that he didn't even realize that he was being pushed backwards off the path until he tripped over something… or someone!

"Ow…" said Ryou, first looking up from his new perch on his bottom at Mariku whose purple eyes were filled with some sort of amusement mixed with disgust. This only served to confuse the teen… that was, until he saw… well, heard what… well, who he tripped over.

Ryou was very sure he had never blushed so hard in his life.

"Get the hell off of me!" yelled a very angry voice that Ryou immediately recognized as Seto Kaiba. Ryou quickly scrambled backward, taking in the scene, and immediately wishing he hadn't.

Joey… his friend Joey… and Kaiba were in a very… compromising position on the ground. One that even Ryou, in all his innocence could tell where it was going to…

Yep this was definitely the hardest he'd ever blushed in his life. (As well as the time he most regretted his mental word choice… hardest definitely was not the best thing to keep the mental images of what Joey and Kaibe were about to do at bay). Ryou closed his eyes and hoped everything would just go away.

And it worked, kind of.

He felt a pair of strong arms wrap around him and lift him off the ground. He heard a deep voice say some sort of crudely degrading comment that Ryou didn't quite catch to the pair on the ground and felt himself being carried away from the scene.

Ryou leaned his head against Mariku's chest. "I think I'm going to have nightmares…"

o-o-o

"So how was the maze?" asked Bakura with a smirk when Ryou and Mariku returned to the car. He was a little surprised that his brother had nothing to say about him and Malik ditching his little race. Although that also meant that he was too distracted to notice his and Malik's somewhat mussed and flushed appearances. He and Malik had some fun before their brothers returned.

"Fun," replied Ryou listlessly. His usual excitement was gone as if he were too tired to keep it up. There were also leaves in his hair. Bakura raised his eyebrows, smirk widening.

"What sort of fun?" he asked, noticing that innocent little Ryou had all the signs of having the same sort of fun that he and Malik did. Which certainly amused Bakura to no end.

"Not the sort that Joey and Kaiba were having," said Mariku bluntly and Ryou nodded weakly in agreement.

"I think we can all agree," said Malik, "That this was enough corn maze to last a lifetime."

"I think Kaiba and Joey would disagree," said Bakura, earning a collective groan from the group.

Bakura smirked. Okay, now he had had enough corn maze to last him a lifetime.

And that's all folks! Please leave a review ^^