"You seriously need to lighten up."

"Are we having this discussion again, Syd?"

"Well, we didn't get anywhere the last time."

"I thought we'd agreed to disagree."

"Look, it's not that I don't have a sense of humor, it's just… subtle."

"No, 'subtle' is 'Nice job on these iguana kabobs, Jenny. I can juuuust detect that faint hint of seasoning you put on the meat behind that overpowering taste of dead lizard.'"

"Ugh. Sydney. Listen to me. Nowhere did I say it's not ok for you to be cheerful and upbeat and-"

"Perfunctorily sassy?"

"Yes, that. But it's not my thing. With all the bad stuff that happens out here on a daily basis, and with all the stuff I've got on my plate right now, it's hard to find stuff to laugh at. That's all I'm saying."

"All the more reason you need to cherish those rare moments of-"

"I've heard the argument a billion times over, thank you, I don't need to hear it again. And like I've said a billion times before, I don't have a problem if you want to approach things with… less than the same level of gravitas that I do, but just respect that I'm… you know… one of those more serious types. It's just how I am."

"Gah. Ok. Fine. Whatever. Subject dropped."

"Thank you."

"So where are we headed?"

"RobCo had a factory around here somewhere. I was hoping to scavenge some equipment before pushing on to more greener pastures."

"Fine. The usual smash and grab. Can do."

"Diane? What… what is this place?"

"Packaging and distribution area, if I had to guess. Finished goods come off those conveyors, they get crated up by those bots over there, stacked onto pallets and rolled out to the shipping docks over on that side of the room."

"Most of these crates haven't even been opened. Wonder why."

"Yeah, me, too. They're not marked, either. You'd think scavengers would've taken a peek inside, at the very least."

"Toss me that prybar over there, let's see what's inside."

"Oh. Sweet. Lord. What is that sound you're making?"

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…"

"Diane. Diane, stoppit. You're hurting the dog's ears."

"Arrooooooo!"

"But… but pony!"

"Yeaaaaaaaah?"

"PONY."

"You lost me."

"UNICORN PONY. LOOKIT THE HORN."

"I got that part, but-"

"I FUCKING LOVE PONIES."

"Annnnnd I am officially creeped out."

"Sorry. Sorry. It's just… I've always had this thing for horses. Ever since I was a kid. I always wanted one, and… look at her. Isn't she just gorgeous? Couldn't you just die?"

"I could just many things. Dying isn't one of them."

"I wonder if she comes with fission batteries- ooooooooooh, yes, she does! Squeeeeeeeeeeee!"

"Gah! Rest in peace, my eardrums."

"Look! Lookit! Look at her stomping those little hooves, it's just the CUTEST thing EVER! Can we keep her? Pleasepleasepleaseplease say we can keep her, Syd! Pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase?"

"Di. Are you insane? What're we gonna do with a lifesized robot unicorn? Besides, you already have a pet."

"Dogmeat isn't a pet, he's a valuable member of the team! Isn't that right, boy?"

"Grrrrrrrroooowwwwf! Grrrrrrrrr…"

"Awwwww, don't worry, boy, Twilight Sparkle isn't going to hurt you…"

"Twilight Sparkle?"

"Who's a good little filly? Who's a gooooood little filly?"

"Sweet Jiminy Christmas. The world has taken a turn for the surreal."