"Mistah J, are ya ever gonna tell me what we're doin'?"

"Now Harls, we've been over this. If I tell you, it won't be a surprise anymore."

"Couldn't ya at least tell me where we're goin'? Come on, give me a hint."

"Harley, do you know what happens to impatient little hench-wenches? They get to sleep outside."

"Okay, Puddin, I'll be patient."

The Joker and Harley Quinn we're headed out on a heist, alone. He had insisted that it be kept a secret, and so of course Harley could barely contain her excitement. She was hoping that he had something romantic in mind, although she highly doubted it. Still, a girl could hope, right? And besides, as long as she was with her Puddin, it really didn't matter what they were doing.

"We're here!" He announced suddenly.

Harley looked around. They were parked outside an old abandoned building that she instantly recognized as Scarecrow's current hideout.

"What are we doin' here, Puddin?" she asked, confused.

"If my sources are correct, and they usually are, Crane is out for the night. Apparently he's out testing some new version of his fear toxin on the fair citizens of Gotham. So, to congratulate him on a job well done, we're going to leave him a little surprise," he said with a wide and malicious grin. He opened the trunk of the car and pulled out a case. He then strutted towards the building, Harley close behind.

Once inside, it didn't take them long to find his lab. It consisted of two levels; the top level was filled with different machines and beakers and plenty of other things that Harley didn't know the names of. There was a chalkboard covered in formulas that gave her a headache just looking at. In the lower level there were shelves stocked with vials filled with different colored liquids, which she assumed were fear toxin.

"So what are we gonna to do? Destroy everything?" she asked curiously.

"Harley, what am I always telling you? You've got to think outside the box. Sure, it would be a blast to blow everything up," he said with a wink. "But that's been done. No, what we're going to do will really put a smile on the people's faces."

"Come on Mistah J, stop bein' so cryptic," Harley said with a giggle. "What are we doin'?"

"We are going to get rid of Crane's toxins and replace them with something even better. My Joker venom."

"Your joker venom?"

"Think of it, Harley-kins. Crane will take the joker venom and spray it in his victims faces an expect them to start screaming about their worst fears, but instead, he'll be putting a huge smile on their faces!" he said as he began to laugh madly.

Harley laughed too. Watching his victims laugh insanely as they slowly died instead of screaming about horrible visions would probably make Scarecrow have some kind of nervous break-down.

Once he regained control of himself, Joker said, "Okay Harls, time's wasting. Let's get started."

And so they did. Harley would dump out the toxins and Joker would replace them with his venom. A few of the fear toxins Joker either drank or decided to save for later. Instead of evoking any fear out of him, it would just make him even giddier than usual. When they had gone through about half the toxins, Joker ceased his laughter and stiffened.

"What is it, Puddin? It couldn't be Bats, right?" she asked, her tone filled with worry and annoyance.

"Nope, not dear old Batsy. Just Crane arriving home sooner than planned. I'm going to have to kill those reliable sources I mentioned earlier. Either his new toxin was a success or a miserable failure. How much you wanna bet it was the latter?"

Before she could respond, she heard footsteps entering the lab. Joker put a finger to his lips and motioned for her to follow him. They tried to sneak out the back exit without being noticed. Under normal circumstances, Joker would be going out of his way to make a spectacle of himself, but his plan would not work if Crane knew he had been tampering with his toxins.

"Joker! Harley! What are you doing here!"

Joker swore under his breath and put on his most taunting smile and stood up to meet Scarecrow, who was flanked by three big and mean looking henchmen.

"Well hello Crane! Didn't see you there! You know, you really should always knock before entering, we could've been naked in here!" he laughed.

"This is my lab, not yours, and if I ever catch you two naked in here I will kill you both. Now what are you doing here? Pilfering my potions?" he growled.

"You caught me," said Joker as he reached into his pockets and pulled out the toxins he had stolen and let them drop to the floor. The vials shattered and strange liquids splattered all over the floor and the Joker's pants. Although he didn't seem to mind, Crane was livid.

"How dare you!" he shouted.

"Oh come on Crane, lighten up," said Joker with a wide grin. "You should just be glad you got here before I could do any real damage. Since you decided to crash the party and ruin our fun, we'll take our party elsewhere. Come along Harley."

"I don't think so. You were probably going to blow up all of my toxins or something equally destructive. I'm tired of you two thinking you're above everyone else and killing anyone who doesn't agree. You may not have done any real damage, but I'm going to make sure you never get the chance."

At the last word, he signaled to his men, who pulled out their guns and began to shoot. Joker was faster and pulled out his gun and fired back at them, killing one instantly. As he shot down the next, Crane must have realized his mistake and ran up the stairs to escape.

"Don't be such a party pooper, Crane!" he called out between fits of hysterical giggles.

"I'll get him Mistah J!" yelled Harley over the gunfire. She chased Crane up the stairs and tackled him.

The Joker finished off the last henchman and raced up the stairs. Harley had Crane in a headlock, but he quickly through her off of him. The force of it sent her backwards, and before Joker could do anything about it, she tumbled down the stairs.

For a few seconds, Joker expected Harley to get up and help him take down Crane. But she wasn't moving. He saw blood trickling down the side of her face. Enraged, the Joker shot Crane in the leg and went down the stairs to check on Harley.

Despite the blood, she was still breathing and appeared to be okay. He scooped her up in his arms and gently carried her to the door. He opened the door and turned to Crane, who was howling in agony in a pool of his own blood.

"Let's do this again sometime," he said as he exited the room.

Please leave a review and let me know what you think of the story so far. If you have any tips on ways I could improve my writing, please let me know