All We Can Do

Disclaimer: I own nothing in the HP universe. Just toying around with it.

Warnings: Eventually there will be SS/DM romance, if you have a problem with queer identities or sexualities, please refrain from reading. Also, I tend to just avoid the last book, plot-wise.

Description: After his vow to aide Draco in his mission to kill Dumbledore, Severus Snape sets out to convince Draco to join up with the Order. In the process they begin to discover feelings for each other they had never imagined harboring, but what will happen when the war is over?

ONE

Severus Snape slumped back into his chair, allowing himself a brief moment of relaxation. Narcissa and her psychotically attractive sister, Bellatrix, had just left; their cloaks were probably just now whipping around the corner at the end of his street. Why had he allowed what had just transpired? Why could he not have thought of some impediment to Narcissa's scheme? Surely there was something he could have done to simultaneously avoid what had just happened and keep his cover? But as much as he wracked his admittedly brilliant mind Severus could think of no way he could have prevented it.

A large, cold hand rested thoughtfully over his lips. The acrid smell of the potion he had been brewing shortly before the neé Black sisters had interrupted him still clung to his skin, but it was ignored. Snape was always proud of the stasis spells he cast, some Potions Masters were so poor at wand magic that they could barely step away from their potions for ten minutes before their spells failed. But Severus Snape had a masterful talent for magic casting as well as brewing his beloved potions. Right now, two floors below in his most secret work area, not the one he used for brewing potions for the Dark Lord, Wolfsbane Potion sat in mid boil, two or three acid green bubble hanging in the air still waiting to pop.

What was he going to do? Poor Draco, his young godson, had been asked to do a task it was obvious he could not compete, knowing full well that the lives of his family hung in the balance. Despite Gryffindor efforts to paint Slytherins as completely heartless in their selfish pursuit of personal benefit, once given the loyalty of a Slytherin was hard to break. Family bonds in particular were important and Severus could only imagine the pain his godson felt at knowing he was mostly likely going to get his family killed.

The door creaked open without a knock and Wormtail stuck his mangy head around the corner. Snape didn't move, moving would reveal his relaxed posture to be something he was ashamed of and therefor something for the ever suspicious Wormtail to investigate. Instead he merely let his eyes flick to the door, hard and deadly cold. "Yes?" He said, barely above a whisper, but with a voice like his, who needed volume to make a point? The sheer acidity of his tone did more than any amount of volume could. Wormtail immediately shrank back a little and smiled obsequiously. "Are our guests gone, Snape?" he asked.

"Why yes, Wormtail, if it is any of your business, they are gone."

"And why wouldn't it be my business?" Another oily smile to glide over his prying. "Our Lord likes to keep an eye on his favorites. Know what they are up to, if there is anything he can do to make their lives better," Wormtail said.

"I'm flattered, Wormtail, to be, as you say, one of the Dark Lord's 'favorites'," Snape's voice was becoming even quieter, he knew how it scared the cowardly man in front of him. "However, despite your theory that due to your service to him that you are the Dark Lord's most faithful follower, I need no one to assert my position. My loyalty is well acknowledged and beyond refute. And so," now was the time for volume, just the slightest bit to make his point, "I would appreciate that while you are assigned to live in my house, you keep your cowardly spying nose out of my business."

Wormtail squeaked, sounding much like his animagus form, and hustled away down the hallway. The speech had been a little out of character for him, Snape mused, but after the day he'd had, who was going to blame him? Sighing, he eased himself out of his chair and went over to the fireplace. Wormtail would probably hide away in his corner of the house for the rest of the day so Snape was free to do what he desperately needed, speak to Dumbledore. He grabbed a handful of Floo Powder out of the tarnished urn on the mantle, stepped into the fireplace, and said, "Headmaster's Office."

"Severus, what a nice surprise," rang out a cheery voice as Snape stepped out into the Headmaster's Office. "You so rarely make use of my direct Floo line."

"Dumbledore," Snape acknowledged the older man with a curt nod of his head. He brushed stray Floo Powder off the front of his robes with an impatient hand and moved to sit across from Dumbledore at his desk. "Lemon drop?" Dumbledore asked his inevitable question but this time, feeling a little off kilter, Snape reached out and took the proffered sweet. He had always like lemon and was almost absolutely certain that that was the reason Dumbledore had kept a stash of them on his desk for the last sixteen years, but this was one of the few times he had actually accepted. Sticky and acidic the candy pricked his tongue as he rolled it about in his mouth.

"Is there something amiss, Severus?" The old man asked kindly. "If I may say so, you seem a little tenser than usual."

Severus, still sucking on the lemon drop, breathed in deeply through his nose and exhaled before beginning. "Narcissa Malfoy came to visit me an hour ago. According to her and my own information, Draco has been assigned a task by the Dark Lord."

"To kill me, yes," Dumbledore said. "You informed the Order of this two days ago by owl, I believe."

"That is correct. But something new has happened," Snape said showing an unusual to not get straight to the point. "When Narcissa visited, she was quite disturbed. Had she been alone I may have been able to work the issue out without this result but Bellatrix..."

"Bellatrix Lestrange?" Cut in Dumbledore. "She accompanied Madam Malfoy in her visit?"

"Yes, and she has shown remarkable desire not to trust my commitment to the cause. Her disbelief, I believe, the main reason that Peter Pettigrew is stationed at my house, keeping tabs on me. The Dark Lord values her opinions greatly," Snape sighed, annoyed.

"What happened during this visit, Severus?" Dumbledore pressed, not unkindly.

"Narcissa insisted that I help Draco in his mission," Snape answered, hesitant to admit to what was now eating away at his soul.

"That is not unexpected, you are Draco's godfather. As a very capable member of the Death Eaters and a close family friend it is natural she should ask you to look after Draco."

"It would be entirely natural and without problem, but Bellatrix interfered." There, he had got the heart of it. "She questioned my veracity and my courage and convinced Narcissa that the only way I could prove myself to them was-," he stopped short. Why was this confession any harder than all the others he had made to this man before? Dumbledore had heard the very darkest deeds Snape had committed, seen the depths of his heart. But he knew what this confession meant for the pair of them and that made it almost impossible. The lemon drop splintered under his tongue, hard shards of citrus-y sugar stabbing his mouth.

"What happened, Severus," Dumbledore leaned forward. It was very unusual for his spy to be so reticent in relating information and his heart ached for the man. Something terrible must have happened to reduce the proud, indifferent man in front of him to stumbling over his words. And he had already been through so much...

"Bellatrix told Narcissa that the only way I could be believed is if I made an Unbreakable Vow. I-I've sworn to help Draco carry out his mission, to kill you. There was nothing I could do, please, Snape's sentence trailed off. His voice was caught up in his throat and he couldn't bring himself to speak further. Dumbledore sighed heavily and leaned back in his chair. The air hung silent and still around them for several minutes, not even the late headmasters in their paintings made a noise.

"Well, if you have made an Unbreakable Vow, by all means, you must see it through, Severus." Dumbledore at last broke the silence saying, "You must help Draco kill me."

"No!" Snape sprang to his feet. He pounded a fist on the headmaster's expansive desk. "No, I will not. I will play my part until the very end and then I will die!"

"We have known for a while now, Severus," Dumbledore said loudly, cutting the younger man off, "that, unless it come tomorrow, I will not last till the end of this war. I have everything set in place and the Order still needs you. Needs you to continue bringing in information until the last. And," he added, suspecting this would seal the deal for Severus, "your godson needs you."

"But," Snape stammered. How could he kill the one person who had ever shown him forgiveness? He saw the way Dumbledore used them like pawns, but considered it his punishment penitence for a lifetime of wrongdoing.

"Draco needs you," Dumbledore reiterated. "You need to bring him into the Order as soon as possible."

"How can you so blithely ignore the fact that I'm going to have to kill you?" Rage and desperation finally escaped into Snape's voice.

"Severus," Dumbledore went round the desk and grasped the frantic young man by his shoulders. "It has to be done. There is nothing you could have done to change the outcome. No matter how many potions you brew this will still kill me." He gestured towards his decaying hand dismissively. "How I die is of little consequence. What we need to focus on is helping young Draco. I need you to convince him over to our side. We will win this war and when we do he will need the Order defending him, understood?"

"Understood," Snape said angrily. He saw the wisdom in his friend's words, after this war was won someone like Draco, the son of Death Eaters, would certainly need as much protection as possible, but it still pained him to look at the man he was bound to murder.

"Good." Dumbledore took advantage of Snape's vulnerability to pull him into a brief embrace. The boy didn't get enough human contact, in his opinion, and if anyone needed a physical comfort right now but would never ask for it, it was Severus Snape. He felt the dark man relax slightly into his arms, the best he was going to get, and then pull back quickly.

Snape headed back towards the fireplace, determined now. He grabbed up a handful of Floo Powder. "I will start working on Draco as soon as school begins," he said as he stepped into the fire.

"Wonderful. Be careful, my friend," Dumbledore said, staring sadly at the man disappearing in his fireplace.