Disclaimer and brief note: First off, I don't own the Animorph characters or situations - K.A. Applegate, her husband and Scholastic own 'em. I make no profit whatsoever from this story. With that out of the way, I deeply apologize for the wait between the first two chapters and this one. I had some ideas for this one, but it just didn't flow out of me like the first two did (believe me, it only took a couple of days for me to write the first two chapters). This chapter took some thrashing out, but I'm fairly pleased with how it came out. As for who will narrate the fourth chapter, I'm stuck between continuing James' thread from chapter 2 or doing Jake's POV. I'll actually let you guys decide in the comments section or shooting me a PM. R&R, feedback is appreciated.

Chapter 3

TOBIAS

One month earlier…

"Morning, beautiful." My stubble-laced chin rubbed against the soft neck of the woman lying on the bed. The love of my life.

Rachel.

"Mmmm." She gave a soft moan and turned towards me, a warm but sleepy smile gracing her lips. "'Morning, Tobias."

"Birthday girl's finally up." I turned and picked up a tray I'd set on the nightstand. After Rachel had pulled herself up into a sitting position, I carefully placed the tray in front of her.

She cocked an eyebrow at me. "Should I be worried?"

"Worried? Not in my DNA." I placed a steaming cup of coffee on the tray next to Rachel's scrambled eggs and toast.

Rachel just gave me that look. "Tobias, you can't even cook out of a box properly. These are way too perfect to be from you."

"Geez, Rachel. I've only been human for, what, three months? It takes some getting used to the small things again."

"I'm kidding, Tobias. It's the thought that counts." Rachel picked up the fork and began eating her eggs. "So who really made my breakfast?"

"Pillsbury. Mom followed the directions."

"Got it." Swallowing her mouthful of egg, Rachel began digging into her breakfast proper.

I went into our bathroom and shut the door. Soon I was out of my pajamas and under the blissfully hot spray of a pulsing shower. That one of the things I forgot about (and missed) when I was stuck in the red-tailed hawk. That and the tense of taste.

It took a lot of soul-searching, after the war ended, what I wanted to do with my life. The life I had pre-Elfangor: being shuffled between a slave-driver aunt and a lazy uncle coupled with a hellish high-school life was thankfully behind me. And now I couldn't live a post-Elfangor life as a hawk. Being part of the Animorphs, my red-tailed hawk is as iconic as Ax, Rachel, Cassie, Marco and Jake were now. My presence encouraged bird-watchers galore to flock to California and spot every 'Tobias' they saw, while late talk-show hosts like Leno and Letterman cracked jokes about how Rachel and I could 'consummate' our relationship.

Thrown in the mix was my newfound mother Loren, who we rescued just prior to our identities discovered by the Yeerks, and Rachel, who I really didn't get close to until after I turned nothlit permanently. After the Ellimist granted me my morphing powers, but left me as a hawk, I could live a sort of double life. My outings with Rachel in human morph were normal 'dates' as we could manage during the war, while during my 'true' hawk form we were in Animorph mode even when riding the thermals. I thought I could handle a double life, but that changed as soon as I found my mom.

After some jarring, press-heavy weeks after the war (plus numerous hours of soul-searching), my decision was made. Even though Mom still had amnesia, it meant we could start over in a sense. Forge happier memories and continue on. I relished the sharper eyesight, restored morphing power, and flying in my adopted form. But birds could only live for so long. I'd be stuck again, only in my human form. A catch-22 if you would.

"Morning, Tobias." Cassie smiled as she filed past me in the library lounge, papers in hand.

"Morning, Cass." I put my bag down by the couch, and snagged a clean mug from the cabinet. From the full coffee pot brewing by the sink, it had just perked. I turned around to see Cassie, who was stuffing the papers into a manila folder.

I had to say, I had to marvel at Cassie's post-war path. Not only did she have a part-time government job as co-supervisor and spokesperson for the U.S. Hork-Bajir sanctuary, but she was constantly jetting to California and Seattle between that and college work. (Toby was other co-supervisor, being the current living Seer in the Hork-Bajir community.) I had to admire Cassie's tenacity and dedication to her work. But what took me surprise was her new look.

I quirked my eyebrows, as it had been a few months since I had last seen her. Her hair (which used to be cropped short) was now wavy and noticeably longer. I guess she was tired of people asking her for autographs, so she decided to grow out her hair to throw people off. That or Rachel wrestled her into doing it (which I doubted).

"You look good." I said, checking the coffee pot. Still pretty hot, and I carefully eased it out.

"The hair?" She smoothed a hand over her smooth, sleek locks. "Well, it's just a temporary thing. After all these years fighting the Yeerks, I figure I need to shake things up a bit. Try something new."

"Didn't you tell Jake that you wanted to become a doctor? Or a vet?"

Cassie fidgeted. "People change their minds, we did that all the time during the war. You know, my parents have been bugging me to write a tell-all autobiography." She sighed and turned back to her folder. "I'm not ready to spill my guts out to the world like that."

"It's not like we haven't spilt our guts out before, but we're all right now." I said, taking a packet of sugar.

"Uh… sorta." Cassie shifted uncomfortably. "So, how's Rachel doing? You know, birthday-wise?" She hedged, putting her folder down and checking her watch. Satisfied, she sank down and took a seat at the table in relief.

"Well, Rachel hasn't taken my head off today." I filled up my mug halfway. No need to be extra jittery. "Gave her breakfast in bed. She appreciated it."

I carefully sipped at the hot coffee, liking the flavor and temperature. Dark roast, a Seattle's Best Coffee specialty mix.

"I have a hard time picturing you, chef extraordinaire, fix anything edible," Cassie smiled.

"Watch what you say about Mom's cooking." I grinned, taking another cautious sip.

Light dawned in Cassie's eyes, and her tone quickly changed. "Anything else in mind? Engagement, dinner and a movie?" she asked pointedly.

"Who are you, Naomi?" I jibed, setting the cup down. "Dinner and a movie is definitely in the cards tonight. What about you?"

Cassie looked surprised. "You've forgotten?"

"Forgotten what?"

"The surprise birthday party." She gave me that patented 'duh' look Marco was capable of on a daily basis.

"No, but it doesn't have to be an all-out extravaganza," I reminded her. "I don't mind that, but 'big party' equals 'big press.' Privacy would be nice."

"It won't be big." Cassie assured me. She glanced at her watch again and sighed. "Gotta go. I'll see you and Rachel later tonight. Marco will call you on where to meet us." She got up, picked up her paperwork, and opened the door.

"Good luck, Professor Evans."

As she walked out of the door Cassie turned back to me, a smile gracing her lips. "You too, Professor Fangor."

As it turned out, being an impromptu college professor wasn't that bad at all. I hadn't finished high school, let alone gain a Master's degree in Animal Psychology & Biology. However, our newfound celebrity status had opened doors I had never dreamed possible.

Since I had spent a number of years living as a red-tailed hawk for so long, I had a firm grasp of bird society, flight and basically everything attuned to my hawk morph. That innate knowledge, thanks to the morphing technology, was the kind of on-hands experience you couldn't gain from years of Earth-based education.

Cassie and I were lured to the University of Washington in Seattle because it was only a short plane flight back to California, but far enough away from paparazzi or nosy reporters. Plus, even in a fairly big place like Seattle, most people tended to leave you alone. Sure, you get some people asking you for the occasional autograph or picture with you - but most of the time, they respected our space and privacy.

As for why I would become a 'college' professor, I was stuck at a crossroads. I didn't want to become the atypical celebrity/actor that Marco had become - staying in the limelight and public eye just wasn't my style. But I wanted to do something fulfilling that I could pass on to others about my years spent as a hawk, my dual human-Andalite heritage and morphing. Neither did I want preferential treatment - the University of WA was only one of a dozen colleges and universities that agreed to pay me the same rate as any of the tenured faculty. Plus the scenic beauty was incomparable.

As for Rachel, she stuck with me to Seattle not only out of love, but because the place offered up several colleges with fashion design degrees. Thanks to saving the world from the Yeerks, she had finished her high school education at an accelerated rate. Marco joked about her gung-ho attitude would make her a perfect candidate for the Marines after graduating, but that wasn't her style anymore. She wanted to leave the warrior phase of her life behind, and start anew.

Even during our Animorphs period, Rachel was a natural fashionista. She always knew what to wear, what fashions were 'in', and had a great sense of picking out outfits for us to wear. It seemed like a no-brainer, and after some intense debate, she agreed to try it. After accepting an invite from the Art Institutes, she threw herself into her studies with the drive I've only seen her while she was in battle. It was definitely a change for the better.

Speaking of changes, being human permanently definitely had its perks. It was nice going to sleep in a warm bed after spending all those years perched in a tree outside with one eye open. Even nicer not having to hunt for your breakfast every morning, and using hands to write, read and carry things heavier than scaly bird legs could. Being a human nothlit allowed me to rediscover the joys of being human again, but not being able to fly was the biggest detractor, right after the morphing. Soaring high above the sky, and using the pockets of warm thermals to glide high above with hardly any flapping… I missed that more than anything. What I wouldn't give to see the Seattle Needle or the Puget Sound with my hawk eyes!

But being human allowed me to reconnect with the others. Not just Rachel and Mom, but there was a definite, changed closeness I felt with the other Animorphs too.

Except one.

"C'mon, Tobias, where are we at?" Rachel growled playfully as I awkwardly pulled her out of the car and made our way to Mario's, one of the best Italian restaurants this side of Seattle.

"You'll know soon enough. Hey hey, no peeking!" I admonished, pushing down the black blindfold back down over her eyes as we walked to the entrance. "It won't be a surprise if you peek."

"You can't fool me, Tobias," she sniffed. "It doesn't take a genius to figure out we're at Mario's."

I sighed heavily, pulling the doors open and guiding her to the section reserved for private parties. "There's no fooling you, is it?"

"Not when I've mor-" Rachel was cut off as I pulled the cloth away from her eyes. Over a dozen people were sitting at the lengthy table I'd reserved for her birthday celebration, and a big chocolate cake sat on a side table along with a pile of gifts.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

Rachel gasped in surprise as the lights snapped on, revealing her party guests. People like Cassie, my mom, plus some of Rachel's friends like Melissa Chapman and ones she made at the Institutes were there. Others we hadn't seen for a while, like Jake, Tom, and Marco. Plus Rachel's sisters, her mom and her dad were there too. But what really took her (and me) aback was the arrival of someone unexpected, his blue fur gleaming brightly.

Ax!

"Ax, what are you doing here?" I made my way around the table and enfolded his upper body in a deep hug. "It's great seeing you, man. Haven't heard much from you these days."

[Being a war prince has had its advantages,] Ax replied as he weakly returned my hug. [And many disadvantages.]

"How is Mertil these days?"

[He is, as you say, "hanging in there." Physically, he is fine but his hearts still grieve for Gafinilan. He's getting used to being co-ambassador for the Andalite homeworld, though.]

"Score one for vecol equality. Speaking of ambassadors, what about Toby?"

[Toby and her people love it back in Yellowstone. She sends her best wishes to you and wants to know when you'll visit again.]

I felt a pit grow in my stomach. I had briefly visited Yellowstone two times right after the war. The first time was the inaugural ground-breaking ceremony and re-christening as a Hork-Bajir sanctuary, while the second was just a quick visit to see how Toby and her family was doing. After I turned human nothlit, I was so wrapped up in re-establishing a human life and my job that I forgotten about Toby up until I saw Ax. I don't think Ax had told her about my decision either, but she probably knew with the press coverage and all.

I forced a smile on my lips. "Ax, tell her I'll see her in a few weeks. There's some vacation time coming up and that'll give us time to re-open the communication channels."

[Very well,] Ax turned back to the table, where Rachel was expectantly waiting for us. But he said nothing more to me and just looked at the guest of honor at the head of the table.

"Sorry Rach," I smiled apologetically. "I believe this was your party."

As the party wound down, thoughts were whirling through my brain. Ax seemed… cold and distant. To a degree, most male Andalites are like that out of principle, but this was different. Even then he would focus on something else during the lull, with all four eyes gazing elsewhere. What had I done to him? I was his shorm. We could talk to each other about anything, a bond even closer than mine and Rachel's.

I had to talk to him. Alone.

"Ax!" I waved to him. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Ax looked affronted. [It's not urgent.]

"It is. We'll go outside."

[It can wait.]

I knew he was stalling. "No, Ax. We need to talk."

He scoffed the floor with his front hoof. He didn't say anything else, but he followed me anyway. As the front doors shut with a soft thud, I turned to him.

[Tobias, I-]

"Save it," I cut him off. "Why aren't you talking to me? Seems like since I became human again, I'm persona non grata to you. Like I'm a complete stranger."

[You think that because you're nothlit again, you can just go back to the way things were? Before you met my brother?]

"No, that's not it Ax." I turned away from him, looking at the sun descending behind the skyline. "I've started a new chapter in my life."

[You want to pretend this never happened? You want to pretend that your father wasn't an alien?]

"No, Ax, you don't understand!" I turned around, my face getting flushed with anger and impatience. Anger at his accusatory tone. Angry at what he was implying. "I can't forget my past as a hawk, as your shorm, and as an Animorph. Not even if I wanted to. It's a part of me, in my blood. Still is."

Ax said nothing. His main eyes bored through me, almost like I wasn't there.

I continued. "Do you think before Elfangor, I wanted to stay in my living hell of a life? Being shared between a slave-driver aunt and a lazy ass uncle?"

I took a deep breath and composed myself. "Look Ax, I know what you're saying. I can't become Andalite, take part in morning rituals, fight or even fly around as a hawk any more. But I didn't do this to spite you or Elfangor's legacy."

[But you've lost my brother's gift,] Ax countered.

I shook my head. "I've traded it for a better one. I just can't spend the rest of my life as a hawk. The war's over and I need to move on. Tell me, Ax, if you were in a similar position… would you stay an Andalite in order to be with your mom and your girlfriend? Or would you stay as a nothlit with morphing abilities?"

[I…] Ax had no words for that.

"Think about it," I turned to go back inside the restaurant. "If you want to talk, you know where to find me."