Diary of a loser.

Eve's POV

(Note: this isn't how it happens in my other stories or the books. It's hard to keep my head around it all xD ...Also yeah it's supposed to be a diary by Eve but there may be some Michael and stuff in it xD. . . she isn't Goth here either. )

Friday 14th October 2005

I have always been seen as a loser. I know I am and I have learnt how to accept it. I'm 13 years old and I am in 8th grade.
Today is Friday, my least favourite day of the week because it's the weekend and I cannot bear to spend time with my family. But I have to after dark unless I want to die from being drained by a vampire- not a good death.
So when the bell for lunch rings, my heart drops, knowing that the day is half over and also that I am away from the watchful eyes of the teachers.
I sigh, stand up and walk away from my desk.
As I am walking down the hallway I shoulder my bag and look cautiously around. I can see Monica Morrell (the school slut), flirting with Shane Collins by his locker. His sister Alyssa is standing next to him, glaring at the girl who is annoying her older brother; she's 10 I think- in the same year as my brother. (A/N- I don't know that for sure but live with it.) And then I can see Michael Glass, leaning on my locker behind Shane, and I really need to get my purse from it so I can buy lunch. No such luck though.
Well, at least the only person there that knows you exist is Monica. I try and reassure myself, but that isn't a good thing, it is better if Monica doesn't know you exist. At least she won't want to kill you.
I guess I just have to grit my teeth and walk straight up to the beautiful Michael Glass and ask him if he will move out of the way, then hope that Monica hasn't seen me.
I hold my bag tightly and walk up to Michael, gosh, he is so tall.
''Excuse me,'' I say, barely audible. '' I'm sorry, but you are blocking my locker... Do you mind...?''
He looks down at me with a hard expression which softens when he sees me.
''Hey Eve,'' He smiles and I stare at him, dumbfounded. How does he know my name? ''Sorry, I didn't realise. '' He steps out of the way and I quickly open my locker, dump my books in and pull out my purse and then I carefully shut it because I don't want to let Monica know I am here. But as I turn to walk away, Monica looks up.
''Excuse me. What are you doing here? Who are you even?'' she yells to the back of my head.
I see Michael shaking his head at me, telling me to keep on walking but I know that it will just make it worse. I slowly turn around to face her, biting the inside of my cheek to hide my fear.
''Oh. '' She laughs. "It's the freak Rosser. How's your mommy and daddy looking after you, now?''
I flinch at her words as she brings my haunting family life up in front of half the school.
''I wouldn't know. '' I say stiffly. ''I'm almost always, coincidentally, out when they are around. ''
But this is a lie. I can never escape their nightly beatings. They practically lock all the doors of the house just so I can't.
Monica just laughs and everyone in the hall has turned to watch. Knowing the canteen food, a good fight is probably a lot better than eating the rubbish they give you.
''Oh really? Well... That's not what my daddy tells me. He says that Brandon helps them as well some nights, am I right? I bet you like it, though. '' She sneers and walks around me. I stay quiet, letting her carry on and listen to her annoying voice. ''He's showed me some pictures as well. Okay, I stole your file but still, I saw them... From the hospital... Pretty gruesome stuff, you cover it up quite well... Congrats. '' She grins and continues to circle me.
Michael has walked around to stand next to Shane and Alyssa and I can feel his eyes scanning me, trying to work out if what Monica is saying is true.
''You're sick, Monica. Maybe that does happen to me but you don't know how sick it is to take pleasure out of it!'' I hiss but instantly take a step back and wait for her to strike.
But she just smiles. ''But that's what makes it fun darling. I may just let the photos slip out onto everyone's lockers, or...'' she raises a bottle of water in her hands. ''Is your foundation and concealer waterproof?'' She smirks, knowing the true answer.
Either way, I get the water thrown over me exposing my bruises to the whole school but I still decide to go ahead and lie.
''Yes. It is. I'm not as thick as you think. '' I mutter and feel the blood drain from my face. But I am as thick as she thinks. I never thought it would come to this. My parents didn't take me to the hospital, it was our neighbours that reported it, but it isn't a serious case and Morganville doesn't care about humans.
They gave up in the end.
''Well, it won't matter if I do this then. '' She unscrews the cap and throws the water in my face.
I hear laughs fill the corridor as I reach my arm up and wipe some water out of my eyes. I can feel Michael's eyes on me but I refuse to look. I can feel my makeup running down my face as I force myself to walk forward and try to keep whatever dignity I have left. But Monica has different plans. She sticks her foot up, tripping me up, causing me to fall and land by Michael's feet and my bag to slide halfway across the hallway.
''oopsy!'' Monica snickers and waddles away, motioning for the crowds to follow her.
''Sorry. '' I say quietly and stand up, ignoring the pain in my right hip as I go and pick up my bag.
I landed right where dad hit me with his belt numerous times last night.
I expect Michael, Alyssa and Shane to follow Monica so I keep my head low and walk forward.
''Wait...'' Michael says calmly and grabs my wrist, right where a burn is trailing down my arm.
I yelp and pull my arm back instantly and try to hold back my tears which are threatening to escape.
''WHY CAN'T EVERYONE LEAVE ME ALONE? HAVEN'T I BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH CRAP FOR ONE LIFE TIME? WHAT IS IT THAT GIVES EVERYONE JOY IN BEATING UP THE FREAK ROSSER? TELL ME!'' I turn and face him just as the tears escape.
''I don't know. '' He says painfully and steps forward causing me to flinch back.
''You should know! You probably want to hurt me as well!'' I sob and turn to run away but Shane grabs me.
A scream escapes my lips as pressure is put on all the bruises, burns and scars from last night's abuse. I know it was probably only a light touch but it hurt like hell.
''Shane! What the hell did you do! Let her go!'' Michael yells as Shane releases me.
''Dude, I barely touched her!'' He throws back and Michael reaches his arm out to touch me again.
''Please!'' I whimper. ''Please don't touch me. It hurts. If you don't want to hurt me, don't touch me!'' I beg and his arm drops down.
''We don't want to hurt you Eve. Shane, take Lyssa home and then come to mine. Eve, you're coming back to mine for a while. '' He takes my hand and pulls me down the hall out the school gates.
''They don't look bad; you only have a small bruise on your cheek. '' He comments, probably thinking I am over reacting, or not believing me at all. I know no-one else will believe it, but I'm happy about that.
''I have a whole body. Father is smart enough not to use my face much. That's why you shouldn't touch me. '' I say bitterly as he leads me down some silent roads until we get to Lot Street.
''Can you show me?'' He says as he takes me down the Glass house lawn and he unlocks the door.
''W-What?'' I let him lead me up the stairs and into his room.
I look around. It's a beautiful house, perfectly done and a Founder's house, nothing like my home since I live in a common house. And his room is a blue that matches his eyes. And it's so neat. I sit down on the bed.
''Show me the bruises. '' He says again.
I sigh and lift up my shirt until it's just under my bra, revealing cuts and burns. His eyes flash in pain and I let it fall back down.
''I take it...I take it that that's only a few of them. '' He keeps hold of my hand and I savour the feeling of this.
''Yes. '' I say quietly.
''Do you ever get any sleep?'' He searches my eyes.
''No... Unless I fall unconscious. I either try and sleep in pain or don't sleep at all because of the fear of my dad. '' I look down.
''Sleep here. I'll take you home 10 minutes before dark. We can do this every day. Then you go up into your room and wave out your window so I know which room you are in-we'll only have to do this tonight- and I'll climb through and stay with you for a while so that I know you are safe, sometimes I might have to sleep there – if you don't mind- and other times mom can come and pick me up or I can run home since I am only down the road but I'll have to leave before your parents wake up if I'm staying there the night... '' He smiles as he thinks about his plan. ''And then on weekends and holidays you can come here in the mornings and we'll go out somewhere or stay here or whatever...I dunno but we'll do something. ''
''Why?'' I look at him.
''Because you are my friend and you don't deserve to go through all that. '' My heart warms as he calls me 'friend'. Someone I can finally trust.
''Thank you. '' I say. ''You don't know how much this means to me. ''
Michael gazes down at me and his smooth lips smile sadly. ''I do, Eve. Now sleep, I'll stay here. '' He murmurs.
I nod and fall into the best sleep I've had in years.

Michael's POV

I watch Eve close her eyes and curl up into a ball, trying to protect herself I guess. I can imagine her doing that as her parents beat her. I wish I could have helped her sooner. I sigh and tug the blankets up over her shoulders. Behind the bruises, she's probably beautiful; I wish that she was my girl, and then I could protect her. But she probably isn't looking for a relationship right now.
The doorbell ringing pulls me out of my thoughts and I silently walk out of my room and answer the door to find Shane standing there.
''Hey man. '' He says quietly. ''How's she holding up?'' I can tell he cares about her almost as much as Alyssa, I cannot believe that, but I guess it's because of the abuse she's getting and also the way she tried to stand up to Monica.
''she's okay; I guess...She's sleeping now. '' I point to my room and he quietly bounds up the stairs to check in on her. When he comes back down he's frowning.
''We talked about sitting with her at lunch before. We always thought she just wanted to be alone... Man. We could have been close by now. '' He sighs as he sits down on the stairs.
''I know. But we won't ever leave her okay? No matter what, one of us will always be there for her, even if one of us is off sick or something the other will look after her. She's a nice girl Shane, she doesn't deserve the pain. '' I sit beside him.
''Dude, we won't just be there to protect her. I actually want to be her friend, I want to be like best friends or something like that.'' He looks at his hands as he speaks.
I can see where he's coming from. We don't want to be 'pity friends' we actually will be her friend. ''I know. We will be, coz dude, we're all she's got left. '' I sigh.
We sit there silently for a good 5 minutes until we hear a phone ringing and Eve sobbing.
Shane and I share a look and sprint up the stairs to find Eve sat up on the bed, tangled in the duvet, with her phone in her hands.
''Who is it Eve?'' I sit beside her.
''it's my father. '' She sobs.

Eve's POV

''it's my father. '' I sob as I stare at my phone.
Shane leans against the wall; he must have come whilst I was asleep.
''He wants... he wants me home I think. It's late. I should be back by now. '' I sniffle.
''I'll take you home now; it's half an hour before dark anyway. What room are you in?'' Michael stands up and pulls me with him down the stairs.
''Top left at the back. The window is slightly open. Climb in and wait for me to get up, I don't know how long it will take for me to get there though. But I don't want you out there in the dark, also lock the door in case Jason decides to go snooping, I'll knock 8 times quietly and then another 3 five seconds after so you know it's me. '' I say quickly as we walk out the house.
''Okay, Shane, are you coming?'' Michael looks back at him.
''Sure. '' He nods and takes my other hand as we run to my house.
''Guys, whatever you hear don't come down. I'm used to it, but it'll make it a whole lot worse. '' I say as we get nearer to my home.
I watch as Shane and Michael share a pained look and then they both nod.
''Fine. But please try and be safe Eve. '' Michael says softly and kisses my forehead.
My heart flutters and he turns away with Shane to go to the back of my house.
''Guys! Be careful, my mom might be in the kitchen!'' I whisper and they nod as I walk to the front door and open it slowly.
''I'm home!'' I call as I close the door and lock it behind me.
''Where have you been?'' My father bellows at me.
''At school, studying. '' I say softly.
'' You can study at home!'' He hits me in the stomach and knocks me to the floor.
''Dad! Please! I'm sorry! I have exams coming up next month and the teachers are helping us!'' I cry as I watch him unhook his belt from his jeans.
''Not good enough. '' He growls and swings it back hitting me again and again across my chest.
I sob and run up the stairs after the tenth hit but he follows me and chucks me at the door, hitting me with the belt harder. I pray with all my life that Michael and Shane have locked it and won't come out.
''Stop running Eve. '' He mutters and grabs me by the hair pulling me towards the stairs.
''Oh God, please don't!'' I cry as I realise that he could chuck me down if he wanted.
''Don't worry Eve. I won't kill you. I don't want to lose my entertainment. '' He laughs and drags me, kicking and screaming down 9 of the 15 steps and then he stops and forces me to stand on the edge of the step on only the balls of my feet, holding me only by my hair.
I look down at the six step drop and beg him not to do it or if he does, leave me alone after. I can imagine Michael and Shane standing there, listening to my cries.
I squeeze my eyes shut as my own father pushes me and allows me to tumble down the stairs.
I hit at least 3 of the steps but it isn't enough to knock me out, sadly.
I can hear him follow me down the stairs and I feel him kick me in the back.
''GET UP YOU WEAK GIRL!'' He yells and I push myself to my feet. I can feel warm blood gushing down the side of my face. ''Darling,'' He calls to my mother as he watches me stand up. ''Put on the kettle will you?''
I lean against the wall for support but he hits me across the face.
''don't you dare get blood on my wall. '' he growls and I instantly stand up, ignoring my dizziness.
My mother comes out with a steaming kettle and tears roll down my cheeks.
Oh god, they are going to pour it on me. I think to myself. This is the one thing that hurts the most.
I run upstairs again, but it's no use since they follow me up.
Dad grabs my wrists over last night's burns tightly in one hand, holding them above my head, pinning me against my bedroom door and holds my t-shirt up to the same place I showed Michael and nods to my mom.
''Please...'' I say weakly. ''don't...''
But she has stepped forward and poured the scalding hot water over my stomach as I struggle, screaming in pain. The more I struggle the more it hurts my wrists so I give up with the thrashing and just stick to the crying out.
Finally, when all the water is gone dad let's go of my wrists and lets me slump down by the door.
''You were a mistake. '' He hisses at me. ''And I want you to remember that. ''
He walks down the stairs and knock the door 8 times and wait to count the 5 seconds but I am in too much pain to lift my hand up again.
''it's me... let me in...'' I whisper and the door clicks open.
I crawl in and shut the door behind me, locking it shut.
Michael is sitting on the bed with his head in his hands and Shane has walked over to look out the window. I try and move but end up collapsing in a heap on the floor.
My t-shirt is rubbing against my burns so I roll it up and tie a hair band around it to keep it in place.
''I-I'm sorry...'' I say to them both and curl up in the corner.
Shane turns to face me. ''It isn't your fault. We... What did they do to you just then?'' he says painfully.
Michael looks up at me then walks into my bathroom.
''They...They burnt me...'' I whisper and watch Michael come out with a damp towel.
''I'm staying here tonight. '' Michael says softly as he picks me up and places me on the bed, he presses the towel on my head to stop the bleeding.
''You don't have to...'' I murmur and look at him.
''I know. Shane, call my mom and tell him I'm staying at yours okay?'' He sits on the bed beside me.
Shane nods and follows his instructions.
''Do you have burn cream?'' he asks as he examines my burns.
I shake my head.
''Okay, we'll get some tomorrow. '' He sighs and looks at Shane.
''I have to get home man, in case your mom calls and also Lyssa'll be home alone at the moment, I can't leave her long. I'll meet you at yours at around 12 Mikey?'' He opens the window.
''Okay, see you. '' He fist bumps him.
''Bye Shane...''I say quietly and watch him jump down.
''Bye Eve, hang on in there...'' He whispers and runs off into the darkness.
I'm happy that he only lives 4 doors down.
''Do your parents go out on the weekends?'' Michael takes off the towel.
''Yes, most of the time. This weekend, they are going to a hotel with Jase across town. They do that sometimes and say it's a 'holiday'; they only do it so they can lock me in here for a few days. Other times they go to work all day or go shopping with Jason or something like that. But they always come back before dark if they aren't staying at the hotel. They leave at 9 o'clock tomorrow morning; they won't bother checking in on me. '' I say quietly. ''They'll come back at 6 Sunday evening. ''Michael frowns. ''Okay, well we can stay here till 11:40 then. My mom and dad go to work at 9 o'clock on weekends but we need to wait until your parents are gone for sure and they are far away. We can eat breakfast here if you want?''
Breakfast? Here? Yeah. They've probably packed all the food up except stale bread and expired meat, but I don't tell him that.
''Sure. '' I smile. ''They'll probably lock the doors so we'll have to climb through the window up here after though. '' I murmur and he nods.
''Okay, you done that before?'' He looks at me.
''No. I didn't have anywhere to go. '' I whisper because I can hear loud steps pounding towards my room.
I put a finger to my lips and pull Michael up, leading him to the bathroom.
''Do they ever leave you alone Eve?'' He sighs.
''No, but this isn't to beat me. It's dinner. We'll have to share though. '' I close the door to the bathroom.
Bang. The door shakes with the impact of a fist on it.
''YO! SIS. DINNER. '' Jason laughs and I hear him place a plate down by the door and walk back down.
I slowly open the door to find a roll of bread (surprisingly fresh), a quarter glass of juice, and 10 baked beans.
Yeah, sharing this with Michael- a 13 year old guy who is used to huge portions- is going to be easy. (Note the sarcasm there.) I close the door and lock it again.
I place our 'dinner' on the bed and open the bathroom door, motioning Michael back into the bedroom.
He looks at the food.
''Have you eaten any of it already?'' he frowns.
I laugh bitterly. ''No. Sorry... You can have the bread if you want. It's fresh for a change. ''
''No, you have it. '' He pushes it back into my hands.
''Michael, I'm used to not eating much, you aren't so take it, I ate some fruit at break as well. '' I put it in his lap and take the beans.
He sighs and eats it. I bet he's hoping there'll be more for breakfast... poor guy.
''I was wondering why you were so skinny and Jason was alright. I mean, I barely ever see you eat at break or lunch but, like, I didn't know why that was. '' He frowns as he finishes the bread.
''My stomach has adapted so I cannot eat large portions without being sick. It happened to the Jews in the concentration camps, when they were released they'd eat a lot and some would get really sick, others would die because they took in too much water and it went to the brain and stuff. But I won't die. '' I frown and then add, ''father doesn't want me to die. ''
Michael flinches.
''let's go to sleep. '' Michael murmurs and tucks me up under the covers.
''Okay. Goodnight...'' I whisper and curl up against him.
''Goodnight. '' He places the plate on the floor and hugs me gently as I drift off to sleep.

Michael's POV

Eve slowly drifts off to sleep. I still feel sick from her cries and screams. And the food they gave her! Gosh, I hope there's something good for breakfast, at least.
I look around her small room; her walls are a cream colour and the duvets are dark purple. She has a few books placed in the corner and on her dressing table there's some makeup.
As her father beat her, Shane and I sat on her bed staring at the door silently. Unable to talk. It was horrible. She ran up twice, the first time I sat by the door as she was knocked to the floor, I wanted to tell her to hang on, but I couldn't because it would only get her into trouble. I wish I could have helped.
I close my eyes and let sleep pull me under, being comforted by the warm form beside me, as I pray for a better day tomorrow.

Okay, that was LONG! All of these chapters will be long for this fiction! Sorry guys! But I'm doing day by day, no 2 days in one chapter stuff xD also I won't do everyday either so I might skip some days if they aren't important lol xD ... I apologize to my beta vicky199416... 4,194 words! (Not including A/N's and stuff) :O That is my longest chapter EVER! Sorry! :D Enjoy Beta'ing it Vicky! Hehehe...I love you for that xD
By the way, sorry I've been dead for like a month, I was in Ireland (WOOH! But stupid rain. As usual!) And my dongle refused to work... But I'm home now... yay... School will be FUN! Not.
Also, I am sad enough to go back through my phone calendar to get the day and date right, so as a fact for you all: Friday 14th October happened in 2005 *Cough* Loser *cough* ... xD
Sorry for the long A/N as well... you probably don't want to listen to all the babble I have been keeping in for so long (: hehe... One last thing- did any of you guys go summer in the city? On the Saturday... If you did... You best have been there to see the guy with blue hair Tom Milsom... Sorry, was listening to his music when writing this xD ...
Anyway! Review and stuff!
Thanks guys! xD
Hannah xx