Castiel blinked blearily, feeling his brain shrink away from the sudden appearance of bright light. He took in a shaky breath, and noticed that he wasn't dead, which was surprising. A collection of blurry shapes loomed into his field of vision, and slowly resolved themselves into Dean's face.

"Dean?" Castiel managed. Dean smiled, clearly relieved to see that Cas wasn't some sort of holy vegetable.

"You ok?"

"Yes… aching, all over, but, considering what Jehoel could have done to me, yes, I'm alright."

"Good," Dean nodded, before pulling back his arm and punching Castiel square in the nose. The result was a strong pain in Dean's hand, and tears in Castiel's eyes as he felt a mildly uncomfortable stinging sensation.

"Ow," he said, although Dean had the feeling it may have been out of pity.

"Yeah, well you deserved it," Dean growled, before stalking over to the window. Castiel rubbed his nose gingerly, sitting up. For the first time, he realised he was in a motel room with blue and white Stetson wallpaper, twin beds by the window and a mangy looking couch, which he was currently reclining on, with a blue and white blanket over his legs. His coat was thrown over one of the beds.

"Dean, will there ever be a point in time when you aren't angry at me for doing something to make your life easier?"

"How would getting yourself killed make my life easier, Cas? How?"

"Given your reaction when I said…"

"Oh, screw my reaction, Cas." Dean was still flexing his hand awkwardly, flinching at the pain in his knuckles, but had force enough to turn an angry, exasperated glare on Cas. "You of all people should know not to give a crap about how I react to things. So you've got your powers back, that's your thing, it's not even my business!"

"Is your hand hurt?"

"Yes it's fricken' hurt, your face is made of angel-steel."

"Let me see it."

Reluctantly, Dean sat at the end of the couch, by Castiel's feet, and let his hand be examined. Castiel pressed his fingers into the grooves between Dean's knuckles, their hands awkwardly interlocked. They sat in silence for a moment as a warm, golden glow slowly crept from Castiel's hand.

"I'm always going to care about your thoughts and feelings, Dean."

"Cas, we're sat on a couch holding hands. Can we not talk about feelings too?"

"I was just…"

"I'm not freaking Sam, ok?"

"I can' imagine ever needing to have this conversation with Sam."

"Cas… Just…" Dean stared resolutely out of the window, his brow set in determination. "Look, can you not talk for a little bit? Just let me say what I want to say?"

Castiel nodded consent, and Dean's lips tightened as he considered his next words.

"When you… when the whole thing went down, before, and you went… rogue… I beat the shit out of myself on a daily basis, because I couldn't see a way where that wasn't my fault. But then Gabriel brought you back, and I thought maybe… maybe the whole thing was just some sort of angel mid-life crisis that I couldn't have understood or stopped or had anything to do with. And maybe I thought that on purpose, just so I wouldn't be guilty. And… And then I got used to having you around, just another guy on the team. So when you say "Hey, I'm an angel again after all"… I mean, I don't want things to go back to how they were."

Castiel drew his hand back as if scalded.

"I would never go down that path again."

"No, I don't mean…" Dean's head whipped round, eyes wide at the hurt tone of Castiel's voice. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face, struggling with his words again. "Ok. So, maybe I liked having you around. I liked you being human, us being on the same level for once. No one owed a debt to anyone else, no one was the saviour or the… the save-ee. We were just guys on the team. But then…"

"You remembered everything I'd done." Castiel stated, staring at his own feet. "I kept it a secret from you for that reason. I didn't want to… to push you away again."

"Wait, what?" Dean laughed. "You were worried about me backing off? Cas… It freaked me out because I didn't want you going back… back to heaven."

Castiel blinked, taking too long to understand what those words actually meant.

"Dean, what… what are you saying?"

"Just, look, let's start over. Forget about who did what. I'm not going anywhere, are you?"

"Well, I imagine the motel would ask us to leave after a certain amount of time…"

"Cas. Are you a part of this team or not?"

"Yes. If you'd still want me here."

Cas and dean smiled at each other, feeling oddly sheepish. The door rattled loudly, shocking each of them out of their staring contest.

Gabriel stuck his head around the door. "Have you guys kissed yet or what?"

Dean glared at Gabriel with absolutely no trace of the happiness that had been in his eyes five seconds ago. Gabriel rolled his eyes.

"For crying out loud, how much of a hint do you two need? Ok, you know what?"

He clicked his fingers, and Dean suddenly found himself with arms around Castiel's neck, lips pressed to the angel's. Gabriel disappeared less than a millisecond later, leaving them to figure out the rest. Down the hall, he appeared in his and Sam's room, to find Sam with his serious research face on, looking through pages of something online.

"They're talking," Gabriel smiled, earning a momentary suspicious glance from Sam. "What are you looking at?"

"Just some stuff… you know, there's a surgeon in Germany who specialises in organ trauma."

"Riiight…" Gabriel grinned. "Am I sensing kind deeds from caring uncle Sammy?"

Sam shrugged, "it doesn't seem fair that Narfi should have to spend his life in that chair, just because of some Viking gods who felt intimidated."

"Well, we can look into that in the morning." Gabriel reached over and closed Sam's laptop, to a momentary protest, before Sam caught the glint in Gabriel's eye. "Hella's safe at Bobby's, Dean and Cas are no doubt busy in their own special way… I think we should enjoy this moment to ourselves, don't you?"

Sam would have responded, but he suddenly found himself naked and horizontal, with Gabriel pressing him down against the bed. Sam smiled and gave in to his boyfriend's wishes. Sometimes, he just had to presume everything would be alright.

(-*-)

They had buried the ashen remains of Jehoel in the Nevada desert, and left her there. Castiel had been carried to a nearby motel and they made up some story about a bachelor party gone awry. After a few days of recuperating, they made their way back to Bobby's, with zero journey time as Gabriel zapped the lot of them and the Impala straight there.

Between Gabriel taking Hella and Sam to visit Sigyn and Narfi, and Bobby resolutely stating he did not want to know about whatever happened, especially if it involved anything other than the words "hunt", "shoot", "curse" or "monster", Dean and Cas were mostly left to their own devices. They were still sheepish and secretive about actually demonstrating any display of affection, but Sam did spot the odd kiss or brush of fingertips, and quietly resolved not to tease the shit out of Dean until he was more comfortable with whatever the hell he was doing.

Gabriel, for what it was worth, was never going to not be worried when Hella went out on her own, but she seemed to take a shine to the Alaska weather, and knew a ridiculous amount of healing and recovery rituals, which made sense when she pointed out she had been dominion keeper of the realm of the sick and elderly. And her spending time with Narfi was unanimously agreed upon as preferable to her spending time with high school punks from Sioux Falls.

Sam figured they'd probably get hunting again soon. Preferably before they'd pissed Bobby off so much he took up shooting at Angels. But for now, they were ok to just get their shit together, sit back, and adjust into their odd little family situation. It wasn't much, and it sure as hell wasn't normal, but Sam was really glad they h ad it.