AUTHOR'S NOTE: The final chapter is up, guys!

Oh, last chapter, the reason why Grimm and Grey weren't mentioned as Thing and Marvel Girl is that they're not superheroes yet. They'll become heroes around Book 4.

"Oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap!" Stephen Rogers had one of his trademarked spasms backstage. "I cannot get through this oh God I'm going to pass out I cannot concentrate!" (NOTE: When Stephen Rogers has a spasm, he forgets to use any punctuation in his sentences except at the end.)

Jan rolled her eyes. "Rogers, you'll be fine."

"No Jan we won't be fine it's like that time we played against the Thunderbolts and got our butts kicked oh God we're dead!"

Peter ran in. "Dude, it'll be alright. Take a deep breath. A lot of people like us, remember?" (NOTE: Yes, if "a lot of people" means "Kitty and Young Bobby.") Peter looked out from backstage and saw that Stephen And The Defenders were all set up.

Stephen made his introduction. "Hey. I am Stephen. My guys here are the Defenders."

Johnny yelled out from the audience. "Is Sammy over there a guy, too?"

"Yes. Asshole. All right, this song is called "Eye Of Agamotto." One two three four!" And the band played their first song of the evening.

It lasted four seconds long.

"It's not a race, idiot!" Johnny gave more comments.

"This next one is dedicated to the kind soul over there who's not afraid to express his feelings. It's called 'You Stink; I Hope Gah Lak Tus Eats You.'"

"Oooh. This one's my favorite."

Then Stephen And The Defenders played that song.

STEPHEN ROGERS'S REACTION:

"We're dead my God I can't take this I'm going to jump into a lake oh jeez I'm not even making sense anymore SOMEONE HIT ME!"

So Peter did. "Get it together! We're on now!"

"Gotcha."

The Mighty Avengers went onstage and set up. Then Jan counted them in.

"We are the Mighty Avengers! One two three-"

Jan was cut short as someone flew through the ceiling into the room. He had a black suit on with a fishbowl for a head. On his chest was an eye emblem. "Mr. Parker!"

Peter knew exactly what to do next. He pressed a button on his wristwatch and a red-and-blue costume was now all over his body. He was now in full-out superhero mode: The amazing Spider-Man.

The fishbowl guy flew toward him. "It is I, Mysterio! Let us battle... now!"

Spider-Man nodded to Jan, Young Bobby, and Stephen Rogers. Within seconds, they had become superheroes too: Wasp, Iceman, and Captain America. Spider-Man leapt into the air toward Mysterio. He landed a solid blow to his solar plexus. This led to a 13-hit combo.

Mysterio fell to the ground. "Well. I was right. You are impressive."

"Who are you?"

"My real name is Quentin Beck. And I am Mary Jane's First Sinister Ex-Boyfriend."

"Say whaaaaa?"

Mysterio launched a bolt of lightning at Spider-Man. He quickly dodged it. Mysterio fired a few more until Spider-Man said, "Hold it! Are we battling to get Mary Jane?"

"Did you not get my e-mail?"

"I didn't." (NOTE: He did, actually.)

"Meh. Oh, well." Then the two duked it out in an awesome melee too indescribable to put on this page. Suddenly, Mary Jane stood up. "It was in the 7th Grade."

"Huh?"

"It was football season, and there were two options for dating. Flash Thompson, the jock who couldn't grab even a B+ in Math; or Quentin Beck, the scrawny but mystically-powered mastermind. I chose Quentin. The two of us were unstoppable. Everyone stayed WAY out of our way. The only thing that got between was his growing evil inside. So I dumped him."

Spider-Man jawdropped. "Wait, hold on a sec... mystically-powered?"

Mysterio floated up into the air. He snapped his fingers. Soon, a cloud formed around him. From that cloud came demon hipster chicks.

Spider-Man did a few backflips toward the stage. Almost on cue, Johnny, Kitty, and Jessica leapt onto the stage in costume as Human Torch, Shadowcat, and Spider-Woman. The seven people together onstage yelled together:

"AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!"

The heroes jumped in the air toward Mysterio and the demons. There were only enough demons to restrain six people. Which was what Spider-Man was counting on.

He fired a web from his wrist into the air...

Swung on it toward Mysterio...

And punched his fishbowl helmet so hard it shattered.

Mysterio's body glowed with light, then was replaced by a couple of comic books that fell to the floor. Spider-Man changed back to Peter and looked at his reward.

"Are you serious? Ultimate Spider-Guy Vol. 1- The World According To Miles Morales? I wanted Vol. 2!"

Mary Jane ran over to him. "I'll lend you my copy." And they ran out the door.

A few minutes later, they were on a subway train.

Peter looked over at Mary Jane. "So... what was the deal with all that?"

"I should have told you this much earlier, but..."

"But what?"

"If you want to date me, you're going to need to defeat the Sinister Six Exes first."

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Enjoy this story while you can. Book 2's not getting put up until I finish Camelia.

Well... what did you think? Special thanks to UnnecessaryCommas and MoonlightSalvation for thir support.

R & R!