Author's Note – This is a James Lily One Shot and is inspired from the song 'I wanna hold your hand' by The Beatles.
Disclaimer – I don't own the characters (who belong to JK Rowling) or the song (which belongs to The Beatles) but I do own the story.
Summary – James Potter was fascinated by the hands of one Miss. Lily Evans and all he wanted to do was hold it, just hold it.
Dedication – This is dedicated to all those who have lost their lives in mindless terror activities, the latest being in the Delhi High Court Blast.
I wanna hold your hand
James Potter had always been a curious boy.
His mother would vouch for it if you asked her. She would tell you about how he chased around a cat when he was about four years old just because he wanted to see what exactly were things called 'whiskers'.
His father would have also agreed and would recount to you that time when James spet nearly six hours straight examining every inch of his first broomstick.
His professors at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry would also verify the same and Prof McGonagall would tell you about how in James' first year he explored the whole castle one night, only getting caught by her in the wee hours of the morning.
His friends would also nod their heads and Remus will remember how James' curiosity had played a big part in the revealing of his 'furry little problem' amongst the Marauders with steps being taken to help him...
…and he did all of this because James Potter had always been curious, it was in his nature.
And the one thing which really sparked off his curiosity were Lily Evans' hands.
Yes, her hands. Actually the whole of Lily Evans was quite an enchantment to James Potter but her hands held particular appeal.
Oh yeah, I´ll tell you something
I think you´ll understand
When I say that something
I wanna hold your hand
I wanna hold your hand
I wanna hold your hand
She waved them around when making a point and moved them gently, unconscious of it, when talking the most general talk
She caressed surfaces gently with them when walking…taking in their feel, their texture, their temperature…pulling it all within herself, making memories vivid and real.
She gracefully arched them when pointing out directions and she skillfully flexed them when she held her wand at ready.
She clapped them excitedly when she was happy or pleasantly surprised and she rubbed her face with them when she was tired or feeling a bit under the weather.
And James…James longed to touch them, to feel the mysteries they had uncovered with a mere touch…he longed to feel their warmth under his own skin…he longed to put an end to his curiosity.
He had tried on various occasions to do just that…he had grabbed her hand suddenly, proclaiming how much he liked her and wanted her to go out with him or in less theatrical ways too…softly asking her to go out with him.
But she had jerked it away each time and this had usually been followed by a long (and loud on most days) lecture on how he was a jerk who was not only ruining her school life with the constant badgering but also invading her personal space!
Oh, please, say to me
You´ll let me be your man
and please, say to me
You´ll let me hold your hand
Now let me hold your hand
I wanna hold your hand
He had laughed at that or rather he had acted like he was laughing and that he did all this to only annoy her…he was certain no one really knew the extent to which he actually liked Lily Evans…maybe except the Marauders and even they had little idea.
Each time Lily had jerked her hand away, a small thorn had pricked his heart but he had laughed it off…at least when he was not alone.
So when in 7th year she actually started treating him as a friend and started respecting him as her fellow head of the student body (both of which took monumental efforts on his part. He had to change his whole tactic, he had to mellow down, he had to grow mature, he had to stop just liking her but actually accept that he loved her), it struck to him that maybe sometime soon he would get to tell Lily Evans what exactly he felt for her and when he was doing that he would get to hold her hand…and…maybe, just maybe she wouldn't jerk it away…
And he did. He held her hand and felt its warmth and her thumping pulse as he laid bare his feelings to her. He caressed it lightly with his fingers as he told her that he would truly be honoured to take her out on a date and that he hoped she will give him just one chance.
And he squeezed her fingers in reassurance that he would never hurt her or make her repent her decision when she nodded hesitantly, a smile gracing her face.
And when I touch you i feel happy, inside
It´s such a feeling
That my love
I can't hide
I can't hide
I can't hide
Yeah you, got that something
I think you´ll understand
When I say that something
I wanna hold your hand
I wanna hold your hand
I wanna hold your hand
He walked beside her, a bundle of nerves, as she accompanied him to Hogsmeade and he talked a dozen to a minute trying to ease his nervousness and he almost had a heart attack when he felt her slip her hand into his, lightly rubbing the back of his palm with her fingers.
And when he looked at her in surprise, he was almost knocked to the ground by the most beautiful blush which rose in her cheeks but he managed to keep himself in check as a big smile lit up his face and he tightened their grip.
And he spent these days of their courtship exploring every contour of her hands making Lily squint at him in curiosity and making her blush at his tender touch and love filled smiles.
They went to classes hand in hand and they came back from them the same way.
They did their rounds the same way and they even went down to the Quidditch matches like that.
When Gryffindor would win, James would run through the crowd, grab her hand and pull her towards him and kiss her soundly, ignoring all the catcalls and the wishful sighs.
And when they lost, she would find him through the madness and lace her fingers with his and gently run her fingers through his hair as he sat dejected and upset.
He held a tight grip to her hand lest he lose her in the crowd when Death Eaters attacked Hogsmeade that once and he pulled her behind him as a low growl emitted from his throat when one of the cloaked figures aimed their curse at her.
He told her he loved her when she was chiding him for protecting her and in the process putting himself in harm's way amidst much tears and screams. His tone was soft but strong and unwavering and he expected a rebuttal and was completely caught off guard when instead his girlfriend launched herself at him, scrunching up his robes in her tight hold as she too spelled out those three words and pulled his head down to meet his lips with her own.
He never sought to remove his hand from hers as she sobbed into them lightly at their Graduation and he never let it go (even though his palm was sweaty as hell) when she introduced him to her parents and conversely he held on tight to her, sending her a reassuring and supportive smile as she fidgeted next to him while being introduced to his parents.
And when I touch you I feel happy, inside
It´s such a feeling
That my love
I can't hide
I can't hide
I can't hide
He laced his fingers with hers as she writhed under him, eyes closed in the throes of passion. He placed a gentle kiss on her knuckles after it was all over and let her drape herself around him, their fingers never losing each other.
He bent down on knee and asked for her hand with the gesture of an open palm and with tears in his own eyes he proclaimed his love for her (although he didn't really need to) and asked her to fulfill his dream and marry him and give him a chance to fulfill all her dreams and hopes and desires.
He felt her squeeze his hand and nod and splutter out a yes amidst tears and sobs and he slid a ring, symbolizing his love and devotion to her, onto her finger and for once he felt that till this moment, her hand had been missing something but now…now it was perfect.
He felt he pull him up and he enveloped her in his arms…the lovers united.
He fidgeted like hell in his room as he waited to be called for the ceremony. He palms were sweaty and he was shaking and his nerves were all over the place. He took out his shoe and threw at his best man when he joked about how Lily would never want such a sweating pig for a husband.
But apparently she did not mind a 'sweaty pig' for a husband because as she took his sweaty palm in her own…he realized she was sweating as well and they both gave each other a wink and that was the moment James Potter knew, once and for all, he and Lily Evans were meant to be.
Her hand was still clasped in his when the priest announced them man and wife and he shielded her from rice, racing with her to the car or rather Sirius' flying motorbike.
She wrapped her hands around his chest as they took off and he felt her lean her head on his back, inhaling in his scent and he whispered softly, "I love you, Lily."
"I love you too, James."
Her hand's hold was like an iron grip as she screamed herself hoarse in that hospital bed and he was certain all his bones had been crushed to sand but he did not verbalize any such fears (he knew what would happen to him if he dared did), instead he spoke to her in a soothing voice and gently wiped the sweat off her forehead, pushing back the hair which had plastered itself there.
And then he was handed their baby boy and a single tear fell from his eyes to his boy's outstretched hands which he noticed were just like his mothers'…warm and inviting and holding every secret in the world.
His own found its way into hers' as he leaned forward and showed her their baby and he gently caressed her fingers as Lily cooed at the child.
He was making Harry laugh which was one of his most favourite things to do in the world when he heard the front door crash open and he literally felt his blood running cold.
He exchanged just a tiny glance with his wife as she stood near the kitchen door, her expression matching his, when he yelled at her to take Harry and run while he held Voldemort off.
Her eyes focused on his and he knew what she was trying to say but not quite managing, "Don't you dare leave me, James Potter! Don't you dare leave us!"
But he pushed Harry onto her and pushed them both upwards just as Voldemort cameinto view, cackling madly.
He heard Lily scamper upstairs with their baby boy and he had not even completed a silent prayer for them in his mind when he saw the jet green light coming towards him.
His last memory?
The way Lily and Harry's hand were identical. He knew everyone saw that they had the same eyes but maybe he was the only one who had noticed the similarity in their hands…and now…now he was going to leave with that piece of knowledge within himself…Harry would never know…
His last wish?
How he wished he could have fulfilled his dream of dying with Lily's hand clasping his…his palm lay open, facing the sky, waiting to be filled.
He just wanted to hold her hand.
And he did…because as he waited at the platform at King Cross' station, he felt its familiar warmth in his own and he did not even have to look back to know that his wife stood right next to him, waiting for the train…hand in hand.
Yeah you, got that something
I think you´ll understand
When I feel that something
I wanna hold your hand
I wanna hold your hand
I wanna hold your hand.
Hope you all liked it.
Thanks for reading.
KingKhan aka Rae.