A/N: So for those who haven't noticed, I changed this story to M. Sorry guys but the next several chapters are gonna involve some heavier material. Hope you enjoy Alec's view of the week.

Chapter 4 – A week

(Alec POV)

Alec was in a melancholy mood and therefore restless. Consequently he found himself wandering aimlessly through his family's large Victorian house. Others would classify it more of a mansion, but Alec hated to think of it like that. The term mansion seemed to imply a cold, uncaring, empty place; a place where family was just a word and nothing more. While his parent's house may be huge and sprawling it never felt cold or empty. No matter where you were in the house, love and happiness permeated the air and more often than not you could hear laughter ringing through the hallways. Just now, Alec heard his father Robert's deep booming laugh mixing with his adoptive brother Jace's merry chuckle, followed closely by an exasperated sigh that could only be his mother's. Even as he silently wondered what his brother did this time Alec turned around and started to walk away from the sounds of his family's laughter.

Yes, the Lightwood house was definitely a place where family was more than just a word meaning related by blood. It was a place where happy news was celebrated and sadness was wiped away with comfort and support. A place where problems were discussed and solved and burdens were not shouldered by one but by all. A place where loved flowed freely. Alec knew his family would be more than willing to listen to him and would do their best to cheer him up, give him advice, comfort him, or whatever else he might need from them. He knew his family would help him work through the things that were bothering him, put a smile on his face, and ease his worries. So why was he walking steadily faster and faster away from his family? If he was being truthful with himself it was because he was still upset with Magnus and just a tad angry too. He wasn't ready to give those feelings up just yet and he knew he would the moment he talked to his family. And so he continued to put distance between him and his family.

It had been a little over a week since they had met at the river and Magnus had kissed him. Alec felt his cheeks grow warm at the memory of that day. He wasn't angry at Magnus for kissing him. Hell, he wasn't even troubled by it. No he was angry, pissed really, because it had been over a week. A week without hearing from Magnus. No emails, no calls, not even a single text message. He knew Magnus would be upset about what happened but he never dreamed it would go like this. With no communication, no talking.

Alec couldn't remember the last time that he and Magnus had gone a waking hour without some form of communication let alone a whole day. Alec wasn't sure if there had ever been a time in the ten years that he'd known Magnus that they had gone an entire week without talking. Even when his family went on vacation he made sure he had a way to talk to Magnus – even if it was only through emails.

But it had been over a week since Magnus had stood up and walked from where Alec sat dumbfounded by the river. And Alec had let him go. At the time he had thought that giving Magnus some room to calm down was best. Obviously his friend had been embarrassed and probably even more confused by what happened than he was. Knowing Magnus he probably though Alec was mad, upset, or worse, hated his guts.

Alec had been willing to give him some space, thinking that in a day or two Magnus would realize that Alec wouldn't care that he was gay, as long as he was happy. As for him being in love with Alec, well they would cross that bridge eventually. You couldn't help who you loved. But a day came and went, then two, and by the time the third day had come and gone, Alec was so worried he had sent Magnus a text asking if they could talk about it. Magnus hadn't responded to that text nor to any of Alec's other texts and calls. And so here they were, a week later and Alec was pissed off at his best friend because he was going to let some silly thing like his embarrassment and fear ruin a decade of friendship.

Alec knew that deep down under all his anger he really was hurt by the whole situation. First because Magnus didn't have enough faith in their friendship, enough faith in Alec, to realize that Alec would understand and forgive him for what happened. Obviously Magnus didn't trust Alec to still be his friend after the kiss and therefore was ignoring him.

What hurt Alec the most though was that Magnus had such little faith in Alec and their friendship that he couldn't even tell Alec he was gay. It was as if Magnus feared that Alec would stop being friends with him over this. And that little thought cut Alec to the core because he thought he had been a good friend to Magnus. That through the years he had shown Magnus that he valued him for who he was and would be there no matter what. Just like he knew Magnus would be there for him no matter what. Except this time Magnus wasn't there to talk things through. He was sulking, clearly embarrassed about his feelings, and doubting Alec.

Alec paused mid-step as a horrible thought washed over him. It had just dawned on him that he wasn't completely innocent in this situation. Here he was sulking in his house, bemoaning the fact that Magnus wasn't around to talk through the problem. He was just as guilty as Magnus when it came down to the department of always being there fro each other. Sure he had tried to call and text Magnus but he had given up when he received no answer. Magnus hadn't given up two years ago when Alec had locked himself in his bedroom after his brother Max had died, refusing to talk to anybody or even come out of his room for mealtimes. Magnus had pleaded with Alec through his door and when that failed he had climbed down from the roof to Alec's balcony. There he sat, even when it started to rain, until Alec had finally taken pity on his friend's shivering form and let him in. No, Magnus hadn't given up on Alec when he had needed him the most, and yet here Alec was giving up on Magnus when Magnus needed him the most.

Shame rippled through Alec as he thought about how horrible of a friend he had been this week. After all Magnus had to be in excruciating pain knowing that he cared about Alec in a way that Alec could never reciprocate. On top of that he probably was thinking that he had lost his best friend forever. How could Alec have been so blind? And so selfish?

Alec blinked and realized that at some point during his revelation that his wanderings had become less random and that his feet were caring him determinedly towards the backdoor. His brain had finally caught up with what his heart knew was right – that he needed to see Magnus before he lost his best friend forever. He pulled out his phone and ignoring the brief shudder of guilt at seeing Magnus's smiling face, he hit the speed dial number for his best friend. He waited and waited for Magnus to pick up. Eventually it kicked over to voicemail and Alec managed to mumble "Hey it's me. I'm coming over. We need to talk…." "Please," he barely whispered before hanging up the phone.

Finally sure that what he was doing was right he sprinted off in the direction of the backdoor. He could be at the group home in less than 1o minutes if he ran and definitely didn't want Magnus to slip away before they had a chance to talk. Just as he was rounding the last corner to the door he crashed into something and went flying face first into the opposite wall.

"Oww… Damn it Alec. Watch where you're going," came a voice that Alec recognized as his sister's.

"Sorry Izzy," Alec mumbled while rubbing his stinging forehead and sideling towards the door that his sister had apparently just walked in, "but I have to go." His hand had just tightened on the door knob when

"Alexander Lightwood, stop right there."

Sighing, he turned back to his sister. "Yes, Isabelle?"

"Where do you think you're running off to? It's like the first time you've been out of your room all week besides meal times and you're leaving without saying a word? So, where are you going?"

"M…M…Magnus's" Alec stammered.

Isabelle just raised one perfectly shaped eyebrow. Her expression clearly saying 'And?'

Alec felt his face grow red as he glanced down at the floor and in an undertone whispered "He kissed me and…" His voice trailed off; he didn't know how to explain how badly he had screwed up this week.

"Oh. My. God." gushed Izzy. "Finally. When, where, how was it? Was there tongue involved? Are you guys together? Spill. I want details. I can't believe you didn't tell me. I mean I understand not telling Jace but…"

"Izzy. Shut up." Alec practically had to scream over his sister's incessant, mile a minute questioning. "First off. I'm not giving details." A pout appeared on his sister's face. "Secondly, I'm not gay."

"But… Then why did you guys… Oh…. Oh, no….." Izzy's voice trailed off slowly as her eyes suddenly went wide. A light flashed in her eyes as if something just dawned to her.

Alec felt the bottom of his stomach drop as cold dread snaked its way through his veins.

"Oh no what Izzy?" Alec had to restrain himself from grabbing her shoulder and shaking her. "What is it?"

"Oh well, I just got back from the mall with Clary. Boy does that girl need a complete wardrobe makeover. Not a single decent outfit."

In his impatience, Alec grabbed his sister's wrist. "Isabelle."

"Oh. Yeah. Magnus. Well, Clary was telling me while we were shopping, that yesterday she and Camille had gone to look at shoes," Alec's eyes grew stormy. Gulping, Isabelle continued, "And that Camille had mentioned that Magnus wasn't himself lately. That he hadn't even left his room all week, not even for meals. Clary said that she had gone over to see him to try and cheer him up, but nothing worked."

Isabelle held her hands up forestalling whatever Alec was about to say. "When I asked, she wouldn't tell me what they talked about or why Magnus was upset. All she would say was that she had never seen him like that before. So…." But Alec was already gone.

Halfway through her story, Alec's hand had gone to the doorknob and before she had time to spit out the last couple of words, Alec had thrown open the backdoor. His stomach full of knots and fear coursing through his body, Alec was at the end of the driveway before it registered that Isabelle's last word was "broken."

Alec already had his cell out and was dialing Magnus's number, praying that this time he would answer. Instead of ringing it went straight to voicemail. 'This is Magnus. Don't bother leaving a message.'

A rising sense of dread and horror spurred Alec on and he neither looked back nor paid any attention to his sister. And so he never saw the sad, pained expression in Isabelle's eyes, nor heard her sigh "Oh Alec. I thought you knew how he felt about you. And I really thought you felt the same way."

She watched her brother race down the street until she could no longer make out his form in the distance. Then slowly she turned to go back inside, wiping away the singled tear that was sliding down her cheek before closing the door.