Ok, so I'm in the mood for fluff...you guys will just have to work with me here. :)
Enjoy and Xia...try not to suffer tooth decay from this... ;)
Mertz
I make no claims to Voltron or any WEP characters.
Random Thoughts
As I sit across the room and watch the interactions of my teammates, my eyes fall on the most imposing figure of the group. Tall, handsome, the commander always has had the ability to take my breath away, from the moment I first met him all those years ago. His dark hair lightly brushes against his neck, recently cut shorter to adhere to some ridiculous dress code that my advisor decided to enact with the upcoming Galaxy Alliance conference. Along with the code was a change in uniform. All of the men, including myself, now wear black flight suits that include the color of our assigned lions across the chest and along the cuffs. It gave me the perfect excuse to get rid of that dreaded pink suit that had been my constant companion for so long. I used it as an excuse to get rid of every pink outfit that I owned. Just at the reminder, I feel my lips curling into a smile. The advisor had been unhappy when I insisted on getting rid of the pink dresses and having more adult ones created.
My attention goes back to the commander as he shifts slightly. His outfit is completely black, matching his lion and defining every muscle of his hard body. Just the thought of it causes my mouth to go dry and a heightened sense of awareness goes through me as my eyes traverse his form from the top of his head down along his sculpted chest, slim hips and firm muscular thighs, finally finishing at his booted feet.
He stands tall as he listens to the lieutenant ramble on about something that happened that day. His dark eyes are intense, calculating, as the discussion continues and his hand absentmindedly moves to his chin, two of his fingers rubbing against his lips as he concentrates. It's an adorable habit he has, not that he realizes he does it. I'm sure if I ever brought it to his attention, he would never do it again.
Sighing deeply, I wish it were my fingers running across his lips. I can only imagine how soft they are since I've never been given the opportunity to touch them. He must have heard my sigh because his eyes briefly flicker over to me, assures himself that everything is fine then he looks back at the man in front of him once more. His hand drops away from his lips as he crosses them in front of him and begins asking questions.
The sound of his voice has always thrilled me. I could sit back and listen to him talk all day, the baritone washing over me causing my already heightened senses to overload. I force my gaze away from him finally as I try to regain some control of myself. I'm the Princess of Arus, I'm not supposed to act like other women. Therein lays the crux of my problem. I'm a princess and Keith is only a soldier, no matter that he has more honor than any other royal I've ever met and has saved my planet from utter defeat more times than I can count. Still, Coran thinks he is not good enough.
Every prince he has brought to me for consideration, I've found something wrong with. Too short, too tall, too much hair, not enough hair, wrong eye color, the list goes on and on. Trouble is, none of them is Keith and as such, fail miserably to gain my favor. Not that the one who won my favor the first moment I met him, has acted on it. My eyes drift over to him once more. No matter how many times I may have subtly hinted to him that I wish for more than friendship, he has not acted on it. Not that I've spoken to him directly about it. I have no fear in a battle, can rush forward to meet any enemy, but the very thought of voicing my feelings to the man I love, leaves me shaking in my boots.
Always the negative thoughts interfere, what if he doesn't feel the same? What if he decides to leave instead of being forced to deal with me? The very thought that I may mean nothing more to him than a good friend has always stopped me from giving voice to my feelings. I would rather suffer in silence and maintain our friendship, than voice the feelings and watch him leave. My father would call me a coward, but it is something I can't help. I've lost too many loved ones in my short life already, I refuse to lose Keith as well.
I continue to stare at him, not caring if anyone else notices. The sad fact is, almost everyone here knows that I feel something for the Commander of the Voltron Force, everyone but the commander himself. It is a fact that has caused many arguments between Coran and myself. The discussion seems to finish as Lance finally turns away but still I can't pull my gaze away. For so long I've dreamed of the day Keith would realize he loves me as much as I love him. We would run at each other in our happiness and kiss until we needed to gasp for air. A silly, girlish dream I know, but one I can't seem to banish.
As if he can feel the heat of my gaze, his eyes drift back over to me. He becomes completely still as a hunter might when he senses the movement of his target. Our eyes hold for what seems like an eternity, mine shining with all the love I feel, but have never spoken of. His eyes seem to darken even more if possible, as if in sudden understanding. The midnight depths burn through me, as if with just our gaze, we can finally say those words to each other.
Someone says his name and Keith breaks the contact, his attention moving across the room once more. I take a deep breath and feel it shuddering through my body as I try not to draw any more attention to myself. Part of me feels like crying at the loss, the first hint that I've ever received that he might feel the same. I rise a little unsteadily from the couch and start for the door. I need to relive that moment in private, a moment that may never come again.
"Princess, one moment please."
Just the tone of his voice has my heart rate accelerating as I turn back to find Keith holding a hand up to me, "I need to talk to you about something."
At my nod, he goes back to his other discussion to wrap it up quickly then moves across the room toward me. His eyes meet mine once more as he reaches me and my girlish dream comes back to mind as he whispers, "Let's go to your office. I don't think we want witnesses for this."
His hand moves to the small of my back and he begins to direct me out of the room as he glances back at Lance to say, "Get those stats uploaded. I'll be back in a few minutes to go over them."
The pressure on my back increases as we leave the room and walk down the hallway together. Reaching my office, he opens the door then steps back so that I may enter first. As he steps in behind me, I turn to face him, only to find a small smile playing across his lips as he asks, "Was that real or did I imagine that back there?"
My mind thunders, do I finally admit to my feelings? Or should I cover it up with a lie? That I don't know what he's talking about? God, what if he is disgusted by all of this and decides to leave? I open my mouth, but words fail me as I suddenly notice the look of apprehension, yet hope, suddenly flooding his features. I shut my mouth but finally manage an awkward nod.
His eyes lose their apprehension as he reaches for my cheek. His thumb gently caresses it then suddenly he forces himself to move away. When he turns to face me once more, his gaze is once again the calculating one, as if he's trying to come to some decision. Finally, Keith says, "I never thought it possible."
"What?"
A stupid question really, one I know, deep down in my heart, that I know the answer to. If only because, it is the same thing that I was thinking earlier. I watch several emotions flash across his handsome face until he quietly adds, "That I wasn't just another friend to you."
Forcing my feet to move, I walk over to him and reach for his cheek. Fear of the unknown almost has me running out of the room. I had shoved these feelings aside for so long. Taking a deep breath, I allow my fingers to caress his cheek, enjoying the stubbly feel. Moving my fingers, I find his lips and caress them gently. Definitely as soft as I thought they might be, they form into a kiss against my fingertips. I rest my head against his chest, still afraid to give voice to my feelings as his arms move around me to hold me close to him.
"I'm scared…"
Of all the things to say, I never meant to say that. What an idiot I am! I feel him shifting slightly, his hold tightening and his chin coming to rest against the top of my head as he asks, "Of what?"
"Everything…" I manage to mutter even as I dig my fingers into his uniform, intent on never letting him go.
"Me too…me too," he whispers back as he holds me close to him.
There is a problem with perfect moments…they always come to an end far too quickly. I inhaled the scent of his aftershave, intent on memorizing every single detail only for him to pull away. I stare at him, confused. He smiles softly at me as he says, "I need to get back to the conference room before Lance comes to find me."
Of course, the outside world always intrudes on those perfect moments. I only nod, unable to say anything when I want him to grab me, kiss me and promise to never let go. Instead, he reaches out once more, his hand cupping my cheek as he adds, "Tonight, after dinner. Let's find some place quiet to talk."
Talk? Is he kidding me? I finally realize that we may start out talking, but end up doing something else and my heart swells with joy and anticipation. "Yes," I whisper back, my eyes shining with love as I stare up at him.
He leans forward, kisses my forehead then turns around and leaves the room without another word. I turn away from the door, happiness flooding me as I realize that sometimes silly, girlish daydreams are nothing compared to reality.