This is dedicated to the lovely AnnaBir, who came up with the initial idea, was a driving force behind me writing it, and suffered through many, many read-throughs and complete edits.

I do not own Grey's Anatomy or Callie and Arizona. I'm actually quite glad for this. Less stressful.

Everywhere Dr. Callie Torres went, people seemed to be hiding something from her. Nurses stopped talking as she approached the nurses station. Interns scattered when she came near. In recent memory, she hadn't done anything particularly scandalous. In fact, she was arguably at her least scandalous since being the resident who lived in the hospital basement.

She was in a stable and very loving marriage. She hadn't been caught having sex with her wife in any on-call rooms. At least, not lately. She hadn't killed anyone lately. She and Arizona were talking about the possibility of a second child someday, but there's no way the nurses could know that.

Lunch was supposed to be a nice treat in the middle of her day. Arizona had picked Sofia up from the hospital day care and brought her to the cafeteria to join them for lunch. She had saved a man's life that morning with some quick thinking and suturing when things were starting to look dicey. But she couldn't shake the feeling that all eyes were on her. Arizona was oblivious, as usual content to dote on Sofia and completely escape from the sick tiny humans upstairs in Peds.

"Arizona." Callie startled her wife, who had until that moment been counting Sofia's toes.

"What?" Arizona held out Sofia for Callie to take her, sensing that her wife might need the comfort their daughter could provide.

Callie didn't take the proffered gift, eliciting a slight frown from her wife.

"Callie, what's wrong?"

"Can't you tell?"

"Uhh, clearly I can't." Arizona settled Sofia back down in her lap and resumed playing with her toes.

"Everyone in here is staring at me." Callie gestured around her to make her point.

"That's because you're so beautiful and they're all jealous of me." Arizona tried to placate her wife with a sweet smile and a peck on the cheek.

"No, seriously, Arizona. Something is going on here."

"Well, I haven't heard anything. Now, let's try to enjoy our lunch, please, because I only have 15 minutes left to spend with my beautiful wife and our adorable daughter and I'd rather not spend it talking about how everyone is staring at you."

"Fine, but could you try and figure out what's going on with them? They might tell you."

"Sure thing, toots."

"Toots?" Callie raised her eyebrows.

Arizona shrugged and turned her attention back to a now fussy Sofia. "Looks like she's ready for the one thing I can't give her."

Callie sighed and took Sofia. Deciding not to give them any more reason to stare, she motioned to Arizona to gather their food and follow her and they walked together to an on-call room so Sofia could eat her lunch. Callie settled herself down on the couch and lifted her shirt. As soon as Arizona saw that Sofia was firmly attached, she crawled in behind her wife, and wrapped her arms around her entire world.

"I think you should stop worrying about whatever it is that has the whole hospital staring. The truth will come out and we will deal with it, whatever it is."

"I know. It's just...everyone here gossips way too much."

"Hey, just think of it this way: if it really is as bad as you think, we'll just pack up Sofia and leave."

"Because that would go over so well." Callie shot back.

"Hey! No need to get snappy. It's an option. Plus, there's no way it's as bad as you think it is." Arizona tried to soothe her wife with an open hand rubbing up and down her arm.

"I don't even have an idea of what it might be. I haven't killed anyone, or cheated on anyone, or anything like that." Callie frowned, disliking the idea of people staring at her.

"I'll try and figure it out, but you should try to stop worrying about it so much. It's not good for you, and it's not good for Sofia."

"Fine." Callie sighed, and took a few deep breaths, trying to calm herself down.

"I have to go." Arizona frowned as she looked at her watch. "Can you take our tiny human back to day care while I go take care of other peoples' tiny humans? I think I get off before you, so I'll pick her up and take her home when I'm done."

"Sure thing." Callie said. As an afterthought, "toots."

Arizona sighed, extracting herself from behind Callie. She leaned down, placing a delicate kiss on Sofia's head, then her wife's beautifully swollen breast, and finally, a lingering kiss on Callie's lips. She backed out of the room, hesitant to turn away any sooner than necessary. When she couldn't avoid it any longer, she turned and wheeled away toward Peds.

Callie watched her wife leave the room, and then turned her attention back to her daughter. "Why is everyone talking about Mami, huh? What did she do this time?"

Even in the OR, Callie couldn't escape the stares. She was professional about it, however, and just continued her surgery without commenting on it. When she had closed, she left the OR and scrubbed out. Knowing that Arizona had already left for the day, she was in a hurry to finish her day so she could join her wife and daughter for an evening at home.

She quickly changed in the locker room and started to walk toward the exit when something caught her eye. A group of interns were huddled nearby, whispering. An idea crept into her mind. She carefully chose her target. Dr. Morris. Barely made the cut to get into the program. A thoroughly nervous creature. Callie walked up behind the group and cleared her throat. Immediately, the members of the group began to scatter, but Callie quickly grabbed the collar of Dr. Morris's lab coat, keeping the terrified intern in place.

"So, I'm going to take a wild guess and say that you were talking about me." Callie said, still holding tight to the now blushing intern. "And now I have confirmation. So, tell me? What is it that you all find so damn interesting that you're compromising your professionalism to talk about it?"

"I'd actually rather not." The young intern focused her eyes anywhere but Callie's face.

"Let me rephrase that. You WILL tell me, or I will make it my personal mission to make your residency a living hell."

Dr. Morris' eyes widened with fear. She swallowed loudly and kept her gaze locked on the floor. "Uh, you, uh, don't happen to be a singer, do you?"

"What?"

"A singer. A performer, really. Because some of the interns, not me, but some of the other interns, found a video of a woman who looks just like you performing as The Lady of the Lake."

"Oh, god." Callie released the intern, and blinked for a few minutes, trying to wake herself from her nightmare. When that didn't work, she realized this was really happening. "Oh, god!"

Callie took off running toward the exit, and dashed across the street, and up the stairs to her apartment. She shook as she turned her key in the lock.

On the other side of the door, Arizona and Sofia were laying next to each other on a blanket, giggling about something. They both looked in the direction of the door upon hearing it open. But only Arizona saw the look of horror in her wife's eyes. The reaction was instantaneous. "Callie, what's wrong?" She jumped up off the blanket and cautiously approached her stunned wife.

"The interns found the video."

"What video?" Arizona questioned.

"A video. That I made after college. That's kind of embarrassing."

"What kind of video is it? Are we talking like a porn video about which I know nothing?"

"God, no. Actually, porn would be less humiliating." Arizona raised an eyebrow at that. "Okay, so after I came back from Botswana, I didn't go straight to medical school. I had a lot of free time on my hands. And I'd always been told I was a pretty good singer, so I did something. Something I probably shouldn't have done."

Sensing the tension in the air, Sofia had begun to cry. Arizona bent down to pick her up, cuddling her as much for her own comfort as Sofia's. "Go on."

"I may have tried out for a part in Spamalot and I may have gotten it and it ran for three months and I was a big hit." Callie said, all in one breath.

"Yeah, you're going to have to say that again, a little slower this time. Because I didn't get any of that."

"I tried out for a musical, Spamalot, and I got a part. I played The Lady of the Lake for three months and I was a fan favorite." Callie hung her head. "And now some stupid intern with far too much time on his hands has found a video of me on YouTube. This is exactly why I didn't pursue it any further. All these people watching me, and staring me, and oh, my god. I'm gonna hurl."

"Okay calm down. Breathe. Try it again. You were in a musical?" Callie nodded in response. "Is that all?" Arizona looked visibly relieved.

"What do you mean, is that all? This is completely humiliating." Callie quickly grew upset at her wife's quite tame response.

"Callie, you are an excellent singer. I'm sure it'll blow over in a few days. It's not like you had to take your clothes off or anything like that." A beat, as she mulled that thought over. "Did you?"

"No! Of course not. Well, not really." Callie was pleased that something about this finally upset her wife. "This body is for your eyes only."

"Good." Arizona put Sofia back down on the blanket and pulled Callie down with them. "So, tell me more about this musical you were in."

Callie sighed, relaxed in her wife's arms, and began one of many tales of her misspent youth.

Thank you for reading. Please feel free to take a moment and let me know what you thought.