Oh my gosh! An Authors's Note before the story! Why, HetaliaPower, that's unheard of! I can hear you saying it lol
While yes, I don't do this often, I felt this one was needed... no, the Librarian is not Hungary. Sorry about name similarities, it was the one that fit best.
Now, read on!

The Pain of Lovino Vargas

This was how he was every night, not just the night she found him- coiled up on the hard library carpet, prepared to cry, stifling it with an angry hiccups or a frustrated scowl. She'd seen him numerous times, and he'd long since stopped even trying to read, considering nothing seemed to dull the pain, she decided.

It wasn't that she didn't like him; it was that the poor boy and his situation frustrated her. It was that no one stopped to see what was wrong, it was that he'd been kicked out to a broken home every night, it was that he had to return to the only place he could be alone.

The library wasn't busy in the evening, and Eliza was often the only one left to tend to it in its closing hours. Nobody much came by, maybe the working mom to return some books or a businessman that left something there.

Except, there was always him.

The Italian boy was there every night without fail, and no matter what she tried, he wouldn't talk to her. Of course, it wasn't like she'd ever given the effort, only hoping that a gentle smile or warm goodbye would cheer him up a little or show him he had someone to confide in. Of course, it never worked; the boy was cold and didn't talk to anyone.

But the library was about to close, and seeing as he wasn't getting up tonight, she had to talk to him.

Pushing her metal cart over and finishing her shelving, she found him against the edge of the shelf between "Mo" and "Sei" in the fiction section. She sighed as she sat next to him, it taking no time at all for the boy to register her, looking over with an infuriated scowl.

"What?"

"Are you alright?"

"What in the world makes you think I'm alright, sciocco?"

"It was… a simple question. You didn't need to get so defensive about it." Eliza looked the boy, realizing he could be no younger than her, probably about 23.

"I don't know you. Go away." The boy turned his head away from her, glaring back out where the window was poised.

"Sometimes, miracles are people you don't know."

The boy scoffed.

"My name is Eliza, by the way." She took a momentary glance out the window, then looked back at the boy.

"So?"

"So what's yours?"

"…Lovino. Or Romano. I don't give a damn. Call me what you want."

"What do you prefer?"

"I don't care!" Romano snapped, whipping his head back around to glare at her. "Go away! I don't need you making things worse!"

"…Why do you come here every night, Romano?"

Romano was taken slightly aback by her constant calm tone, but he didn't show this and simply scoffed.

"Because home sucks."

"Tell me about it."

"No."

Eliza remained silent for a moment.

"Why not?" She finally asked.

"Because when I'm at home, nobody cares about me, so why should you?" Romano growled.

"Because I'm not at home." Eliza set her hand on his gently, and surprisingly, he didn't pull away. Instead, he simply took a deep breath, preparing to talk without breaking down.

"Because when I'm at home, everyone loves my little brother more than me. Antonio, and Francis, and Ludwig- Not that I would WANT the potato bastard to love me more!- and just about everyone there. I hate it. I hate it all."

"Is that it?"

"What do you mean, is that it?"

"Tell me about… the most important person to you."

"Antonio… took care of me, but he's always acting like an idiot, and grinning about everything, even when he's sad… and he dotes on my brother, even though he doesn't get that I care about him so much, and he never listens to me when Feliciano is around, because Feliciano takes everyone's fucking priority." Romano let out a frustrated growl, a squeal of sorts, and punched the ground.

"How does he act when it's just you?" Eliza asked, now starting to get a feel for the situation.

"He's always so… happy. He only pays attention to me, and he's just so attentive it's kinda annoying. He's never mad or angry towards anyone, especially not me; except for that one time Francis groped me, but… that was a different story. He was only angry at Francis, but even stupid Ludwig was angry about that, and he doesn't give two frisk about me."

"And how does he act around Feliciano?" the librarian asked.

"He's just doting on the boys every want, catering and spoiling him, and he pays more attention to Feliciano than me. I'm fucking invisible compared to my stupid little brother…" Romano buried his face in his knees.

"You know what I think?"

"What?"

Eliza sighed.

"I think Antonio cares about you very much, even more than your brother. You become the center of the world when you're around… and maybe, just because your brother's needy, he gets a little overwhelmed. Maybe he's frustrated sometimes."

"…It wouldn't matter," Romano muttered. "…Can I… tell you something?"

"Shoot."

"Sometimes… I think about killing myself… and I want to do it so badly that I start to hate life more and more…"

"Why? It's clear to me Antonio loves you, a lot. You should be happy."

"It wouldn't matter… once I'm gone, he could just forget about me… he wouldn't get overwhelmed or frustrated and he could dote on Feliciano all he wanted to. He wouldn't care… if I were gone."

"…Hmm. That's an interesting perspective. We'll be leaving after this, but do you want my honest opinion, no holes barred?"

Romano looked up at her.

"I think it works like this- in the big picture, you mean nothing. Your death wouldn't affect your country's people or the world's citizens. But in the small picture… your death would be more devastating that if the whole world was lost to those who love you. And I think that's the worst price to pay." And with that, Eliza stood, grabbed her cart, and looked back with a gentle smile. "Have a nice night."

As Romano lay in bed that night, slowly falling asleep, he decided he would go through with his plan… if Spain didn't fix everything.

A/N: An authors note real quick so I don't piss everyone off! This will be very angsty, and there will be suicide in it (I'm not telling you whether it's succesful or not), but there will be alot of ocmfort. A lot.
And Spamano. 'Cause... 'Cause I like Spamano and it only fits.