Summary: 'Are you looking for a long and happy relationship? Well then, you've come to the right place! Welcome to PokeMatch, where we match you up with the person you're destined to be with! Just take our standardized personality test and prepare to meet the love of your life today!' "Oh please, these things are a load of—" Ikari! Rather large smidges of Contest, OldRival, Poke, and Curtain. Two-shot

A/N: This is what I imagine matchmaking websites are like in the world of Pokemon, alright? It has in no way, any sort of relation to any actual matchmaking or dating website in the real world, so WHEN you review, I don't want any comments like 'Oh you forgot this, and so and so doesn't actually happen, it's all wrong.' Comprendo? FANTASTICO!

Warnings: Is rated for almost swearing and usage of the words 'Heck' and 'Hell'. Beware of OOC Gary and Maylene. And the writer is very inexperienced. You have been warned.

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. I do, however, own any annoying songs that will appear. Yes, I used my magnificent brain to think them all up.

Right-o ladies and gentlemen, please do enjoy.

Torture for Two

"C'mon Paul, you were dared, so you have to do it! Don't be a wuss!" Gary whined as he dragged an unwilling Paul towards the computer, "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, C'MON!" he yelled in Paul's ear, causing said boy to glare at Gary.

"You know Paul," started Drew lazily as he watched with amusement, "he won't give up until you do it, so save us all an earache and just do the thing." He advised from his position on his bed.

Paul scowled and firmly planted his feet into the carpeted ground, ignoring Gary's constant screeching in his ear. "No." he said, simple and abrupt.

Drew shrugged and produced his PokePod from his back pocket, meaning to drown out Gary's constant shouts. But as soon as he finished uncoiling the headphones, the bedroom door flew open with quite a bang, causing a surprised Drew to curse as his PokePod clattered noisily to the floor.

Ash stood in the doorway, hugging a bucket of mint ice cream to his chest, a spoon sticking out of the corner of his mouth as he grinned. "Hey guys!" Ash enthusiastically waved his spoon around when he took it out of his mouth, "Did you get Paul to—?" Drew cut him off by glaring and mumbling something under his breath as he clambered off the bed to retrieve his PokePod. Ash took this time to analyze the scene before him and answer his own question. "Oh… so he still hasn't taken the thing yet, has he?"

Paul snorted and glared at Gary as he scurried behind the taller male and proceeded to push him towards the computer, which had little effect. "Oh c'mon Paul!" Gary managed to grunt as he shoved against the purple haired teen, "Just… fill the… stupid thing… out!"

"Once again, no."

As he watched the commotion between the two, Ash got an idea. Grinning even wider than before, he waddled over to where Paul and Gary were 'conversing' and stood in front of the two, gaining no attention what-so-ever.

"Gary. Stop. Pushing. Me."

"Guys?"

"NEVER!"

"Uh, hello!"

"I swear, if you don't stop right now, I'll—"

"Hey! Are you listening to me?"

"—rip off that stupid face of yours and shove it up your—"

"HOLY CRAP! LOOK AT THAT FISH!"

Ash smiled as the two boys halted in their previous antics and directed their attention towards him; he also managed to gain the attention of Drew, who had been scrolling through his play list.

"What fish?"

"I don't see any fish."

"Maybe he's crazy."

"He's not the only crazy one here."

"What did you say?"

"I said, he's not the only crazy one here."

"I heard you the first time, idiot!"

"Then why did you ask?"

"Ever heard of a rhetorical question?"

"Indeed I have."

Ash sighed; maybe he'd have to try harder.

"Then shouldn't you know one when you hear one? Or are you too stupid?"

"Oui! I am not stupid! Okay, so maybe my grades are a little below average, but that doesn't mean I lack intelligen—"

"HEEEEEEEY GUUUUUUUYSSSS!"

"WHAT?"

"I have an idea!"

And suddenly, all went silent; the other three that occupied the room stared in dumb shock as they tried to process what Ash had just said. An idea? Ash Ketchum, had an… idea. The thought itself was so shocking that even Paul could not produce a snappy remark.

In fact, all that came out of his mouth was "… what?"

To which Ash replied "I had an idea!"

And silence once again consumed the room.

Ash frowned, why were they suddenly so quiet and unmoving? Was his fly down? Did he have something on his face? "Uh… guys? Is something wrong?"

Gary, who had jolted out of his trance moments before, shot up and started running around the room yelling, "IT'S NOT EVEN 2012 AND THE APOCALYPSE IS STARTING! AH! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" over and over.

Drew, who had fallen off of his bed at Ash's earlier proclamation, continued to stare at the Pikachu loving food-a-holic as if Sitrus berries were sprouting out of his ears.

Paul, however, quickly regained his composure and tripped Gary as he made his third circle around the room, causing the auburn haired boy to land face flat onto the floor, thus ceasing his cries of alarm. Paul then flicked Drew on his temple, and Drew responded by snapping out of his daze and glaring at the lavender haired boy next to him before turning back to Ash who had been waiting patiently.

"You had an… idea?" Drew asked deliberately slow.

"Yes…"

"This is a once in a lifetime occurrence! Hurry up and tell us before the media gets here!"

Ash frowned again, had he just been insulted? Ah well, never mind that now, "Well since Paul won't do the test, and it was a dare, how about we don't do our dares!"

There was silence once again, before Paul sighed and glared at Ash, "Fine, I'll do the stupid thing, but then I'm changing your dares." But before anyone had time to protest against him, he continued, "Drew, you're kissing Maple for an entire minute, Ash, you have to ask Waterflower out tomorrow, and Gary…" Paul got an evil glint in his eye and he chuckled darkly, "you have to do 'the thing' in public."

Gary, who had sensed something terrible was coming his way, stood up and nearly tackled the smirking lavender haired male. "NOT COOL MAN!"

X—x—X

Name: Paul Shinji

Age: 16

Gender: Male

I am looking for a (Woman)of age range (15-16) who resides in (Veilstone City)

1. What do you look for in a person? I am looking for someone who is not annoying and has a high IQ because I have to deal with enough idiocy and stupidity in my life due to my choice of friends.

2. What is your most appealing feature? 'My dreamy onyx eyes and my mysterious and cold demeanor' or so my fan club says.

3. What do you enjoy doing? I don't 'enjoy' anything, 'having fun' isn't in my DNA.

4. What type of people do you surround yourself with? Like I typed in question 1, complete idiots.

5. What would people describe you as? Cold, mean, harsh, cruel, violent, cunning, temperamental, dark, moody, dreary, emotionless, indifferent, stony, bitter, rude, hostile, evil, malicious, unfriendly, rough, snide, unpleasant, bleak, dull… that just about sums it up.

6. If you went out on a first date with someone, where would you take him/her? Me? Take someone? If I had been anyone different, I would've laughed.

7. What do you believe is the key to a happy relationship? Money.

8. What is your goal in life? To live past 20 without being annoyed to death by my friends.

9. What is your biggest pet peeve? Biggest? There are too many, I can't just choose one.

10. What is the first thing you think of when you hear the word 'Romance'? Send me to Hell.

Congratulations! You have successfully completed our personality test! Please submit your test and wait five to ten minutes for your perfect match and the time and location of your date.

Submit

X—x—X

Paul sat back in his chair and glared at the laughing boys that stood all around him, "I hope you know I'm not actually going on a date with whatever freak I'm matched up with." He said icily.

His friends just laughed harder.

X—x—X

Dawn glanced unsurely at the bright webpage on the computer before turning back to face her three best friends, "Do I really have to?" she whined, pouting like a child, "I mean, there are other ways to meet guys, come on, please?"

May shook her head stubbornly and pushed Dawn's chair around so that it faced the computer once again, "Dawn, honey, you need some love in your life! And besides, from what I've heard, this is the easiest way to find a boy." she replied.

Dawn huffed and spun back around to face her friends once more, "If it's so easy, then why don't you try it? You're not dating!"

A few feet away from the two, a carrot-top was sprawled across the bed, "Dawn, Dawn, Dawn," she tutted as she shook her head, "the only reason May hasn't gone out on a date for so long is because her heart belongs only to Drew." Misty smirked as May started sputtering incoherently. After a few seconds, the brunette finally regained her composure and shouted, "I do NOT have feelings for that egotistical jerk!" with a crimson blush painted on her cheeks, "And besides, what about you and Ash, huh? You two still haven't gone out on a date, even when it's so clear that you two are meant for each other."

Leaf, who had sat on the sidelines throughout the entire conversation so far, finally spoke as she saw the carrot-top ready to burst with embarrassment and anger. "It's true Mist, we've seen the way you two look at each other, all googly eyed and dreamy-like, don't even try denying it!"

Sputtering like May had only moments before; Misty finally managed to glare at the two offending brunettes, "Oh yeah? Well how about Gary? Hm. Leaf? You and him were pretty comfortable on Friday night!" she accused.

Her green eyed friend turned red as a Cheri berry, "H-hey!" she stuttered, embarrassed beyond belief. "That was an accident and you know it!" Then she addressed her blue haired friend who sat quietly in her chair, "Back me up, Dawn." She muttered in her ear.

Dawn recalled the memory of the night two days prior and frowned, "Sorry Leaf, but I think Misty's right, you two were so close to each other, you might as well have been—" but before she was able to finish, Leaf abruptly slammed a hand over her mouth and glared, "We were NOT!" she shouted, her face turning even darker.

"But Leafy," May sang in a cheery voice as she waved her index finger in the air, "I think you WERE!" then the three girls that were not Leaf Green burst into fits of laughter. Leaf, however, was not amused; in fact, she was extremely embarrassed. But her embarrassment soon ebbed away as she saw the glowing screen of the computer not too far away.

"Hey!" Leaf said, gaining their attention, "Dawn, you still need to take that quiz…" she reminded them.

May stopped laughing and sprang up immediately, swinging the surprised blunette back around to face the computer, "That's right! Thanks for the reminder Leaf!" she chirped to her fellow brunette.

Dawn frowned at the computer and glared at a smiling Leaf through the corner of her eye. "Yeah, thanks Leaf…" she muttered before turning her attention back to the screen and submitting to her doom.

X—x—X

Name: Dawn Berlitz

Age: 15

Gender: Female

I am looking for a (Man)of age range (15-16) who resides in (Veilstone City)

1. What do you look for in a person? I guess I'm looking for someone who is kind, compassionate, and can stand up for himself. Oh, and I wouldn't mind if he was good looking either.

2. What is your most appealing feature? Physical feature? Hm… well, I really don't know, maybe my eyes?

3. What do you enjoy doing? Oh, this one's easy! Hanging out with my friends, going shopping and having sleepovers and parties! But mainly, just having fun with my BPLFFFL's! (That's Best Pokemon Loving Female Friends For Life in case you're wondering.)

4. What type of people do you surround yourself with? All different kinds, my friends, Misty, May, and Leaf, are all super nice though! Even when they're annoying and try to set me up on dates and force me to do tests on websites, they're still the best!

5. What would people describe you as? Happy and kind are the two words that come up often. Then again, there's this one really annoying guy who always calls me 'Troublesome' whenever I see him, he can't even remember my name even though I've told him like, a zillion times! Gosh, he's such a jerk…

6. If you went out on a first date with someone, where would you take him/her? I guess I'd take him somewhere nice and peaceful, maybe a picnic by a lake or something, I really don't know. Boys are usually the ones who set the dates.

7. What do you believe is the key to a happy relationship? Love, I think. When two people really, and I mean REALLY, love each other, their relationship will be one that lasts forever and ever!

8. What is your goal in life? Um, I really want to live up to my mom's reputation as Top Coordinator, so I guess my biggest goal in life would be to win the Grand Festival and be a successful person in general.

9. What is your biggest pet peeve? Uh… when people forget to flush…?

10. What is the first thing you think of when you hear the word 'Romance'? Well, three things immediately pop up, my best friends and their (unofficial) boyfriends. May and Drew (They love each other even though they haven't admitted it.) Misty and Ash (A match made by the gods!) and Leaf and Gary (Aww… they're so cute together, cuter than a truck full of Happiny's could ever be.) None of them are together yet, but my matchmaking instincts are telling me it's going to happen soon! Eep!

Congratulations! You have successfully completed our personality test! Please submit your test and wait five to ten minutes for your perfect match and the time and location of your date.

Submit

X—x—X

Shoving a spoonful of ice cream in his mouth, Ash smiled happily as his friends watched the gluttonous boy devour yet another tub of ice cream. In a matter of seconds, the contents had been emptied out entirely, so the boy threw the tub onto the mountain of empty tubs that occupied the space around him. But while reaching for another bucket to consume, Ash came upon the unfortunate discovery that he had already eaten every last morsel of the delicious frozen treat.

"Drew," he called, eyes flitting over to the chartreuse haired lad, "You need to get more ice cream." He said, gesturing to the enormous pile of tubs with his spoon.

A low whistle came from Gary as he checked his watch, "Wow Ash, six minutes to empty out Drew's secret stash of ice cream." Gary's gaze shifted back to the pile of tubs, "That's gotta be a new record."

Drew watched as Ash licked his fingers contently, "It is, last time, it took nine." And then he frowned and crossed his arms over his chest in a childlike manner, "Now I don't have any ice cream left." He huffed and flicked his hair snobbishly before turning away from Ash.

As each boy was caught up in their own thoughts, a metallic chime rang throughout the room, Paul, who had been sitting idly by the computer, turned his head towards the screen and frowned at what he saw.

"Hey—"

"Ohmigosh! Paul got his perfect match results! I can't wait to see!" the boys pushed past each other and nearly trampled the unfortunate purple haired teen on the way to the computer. Paul was squished back and his view of the screen was blocked.

Clicking the 'View results' button, Drew and the rest leaned forward in anticipation, their noses practically pressed against the screen as the remarkably slow computer loaded…

And loaded…

And loaded…

And loaded…

And loa—

Oh wait, it was done.

Three jaws dropped open as they stared at the name displayed on the screen, oh no… no, no, no, no, no… Paul was not going to like this.

Speaking of Paul…

"Argh! Get your butts out of my face!" he yelled as he pushed the three boys aside, they gladly complied and hid behind whatever large object they could find, peeking out only so they could see his reaction.

Paul righted himself and glanced at the screen. He read the message quickly and turned back to his friends, but then his brain actually registered what he had just read, causing him to do a double take and stare at the screen with wide-eyes, his face growing redder and redder as he read each word again.

Congratulations! We've successfully determined that the person that you're destined to be with is the one and only…

Dawn Berlitz!

You have a wonderful relationship ahead of you!

Date time: Sunday, 7:00 P.M.

Date location: Valor Lakefront, "Seven Stars Restaurant", reservations have been made

We hope you are satisfied with your results.

X—x—X

Congratulations! We've successfully determined that the person that you're destined to be with is the one and only…

Paul Shinji!

You have a wonderful relationship ahead of you!

Date time: Sunday, 7:00 P.M.

Date location: Valor Lakefront, "Seven Stars Restaurant", reservations have been made

We hope you are satisfied with your results.

"Oh…" Leaf started.

"My…" Misty continued.

"Gawd…" May finished.

The three exchanged looks, and simultaneously burst out laughing, "Ohmigosh, ohmigosh, ohmigosh! Dawn-y has a date with Paul-y! Dawn-y has a date with Paul-y!" they sang together, jumping around in circles. Soon, they collapsed into heaps on the ground, still laughing like idiots.

But the laughter soon came to a halt as a flush was heard, accompanied by the slamming of a door and the opening of another, and then three girls found themselves staring up at a curious Dawn.

"I heard you guys laughing all the way from the bathroom, what's so funny?" she asked, tilting her head to the side. But rather than receiving an answer, Dawn was met by more howls of laughter.

"L-look… at th-the… screen!" Misty managed to choke between laughs.

Dawn, now confused, curious, and a bit scared, made her way over to the computer that sat innocently in the corner of the large bedroom. She bent down so she was eye level with the screen and she slowly read the message displayed on the page.

When she finished reading, she was frozen in place, the look of absolute horror written about her scarlet face.

Misty panted and wiped sweat from her brow as she collected herself up from the floor and stumbled over to where Dawn rigidly stood. "Dawn…?" Misty said worriedly as she noticed her friend's face had gone from red to sheet white. "Hey… Dawn?" she asked again, waving a hand in front of the pale girl's face. When she got no response, she turned back towards the two on the ground, "Hey guys, something's wrong with Dawn."

May waved her hand dismissively as she got up from the floor, Leaf soon following. "Oh nothing's wrong with her, she's just gone into a state of shock," May explained, strolling over to where Misty stood. "She'll probably snap out of it soon." Leaf examined Dawn's frozen form; curiously, she poked the blunette's arm, hoping to evoke a reaction.

Dawn teetered a bit before crashing onto the ground.

X—x—X

"You will go on the date!" May screamed as she chased Dawn around the room.

"NO! You can't make me!" Dawn yelled back, frantically trying to maneuver through the scattered piles of clothing everywhere.

"Yes. I. CAN! Now get over here!" May put on a burst of speed into her sprint and tackled Dawn to the floor. They wrestled for a bit, but May's strength proved superior as she forced Dawn down and sat on her back. "HA! I win! Now put on the stupid dress!" she shoved the clothing into Dawn's face, who in turn glared.

"Well, I can't exactly move with you sitting on top of me, so how on Earth am I supposed to put a dress on?" the girl on the floor retorted. May's crazed look disappeared and her rationality returned, "I guess you're right… Hm, fine, but when I get off, you better not run away! Or else I'll call Misty and her mallet!" she threatened. Dawn nodded vigorously and smiled as May finally got off of her.

But that smile soon turned demonic as she sprang up and quickly called out her Pokemon, "PIPLUP! Keep May busy while I escape by using Bubblebeam!" she commanded the small blue penguin. The Pokemon called its name and complied, shooting a thick stream of bubbles at the surprised brunette.

As May was hit with the attack, she fell back sputtering, leaving Dawn and Piplup just enough time to dash out of the room.

"FREEDOM!" Dawn screamed triumphantly, earning a happy chirp from her tiny blue partner in crime as he waddled next to her.

After a few seconds, she disappeared from sight, leaving a sopping wet May fuming as she called out her own Pokemon.

"Blaziken!" she barked to her fully evolved starter, "AFTER THEM!"

And so the great chase continued.

X—x—X

Reggie was in the kitchen making himself a snack as he shrieked along to an upbeat pop song he had bought on PokeTunes the other day,

"Oooooo, baby, yeah, yeah, yeah! Whoaaa, oh, oh! Can't you see, baby, that you and I be-long to-gether? 'Cause it's clear to me now, that we were meant to beeee! Yeah, yeah, yeah! There's no denying, no-oh, our special connection, whoa-oh, so don't even try, try, try, 'cause you won't say good bye, bye, bye, not when you're this close to true love! Whoa, whoa, yeah, yeah, oh, whoa, WHOOA-OH-OOO—"

RING!

The shrill ringing of the screen phone interrupted Reggie in the middle of his high note. Dropping the celery sticks he was holding, Reggie tore off his apron and rushed over to where the video phone sat, lodged in the wall.

Checking himself to make sure he was presentable, Reggie finally summed up that he was suitable to be seen. And just as the last ring was about to sound, Reggie clicked the 'Accept Call' button.

"Shinji residence, Reggie Shinji speaking, how may I help you?" he asked pleasantly.

On the other side of the line, Drew gasped with relief, "Reggie!" he exclaimed as he saw the image of Paul's older brother fizzle to life, "We really need your help! You see, Paul has a date w—"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, back it up!" Reggie waved his hands in front of his face as he shook his head in a disbelieving manner. "Paul… has a date?" he asked, stressing the last word dramatically.

"Yes, Paul has a date, now as I was saying, w—"

"Wait," Reggie interrupted once again, "OUR Paul?"

"Yes, OUR Paul, now if you'll listen—"

"Paul SHINJI? As in, my little brother?" Reggie asked, completely ignoring Drew's previous attempts to talk.

Irritation, among other emotions, flickered across Drew's face as he twitched, "Yes, Paul SHINJI, your little brother, but seriously, we nee—"

"Well that's GREAT!" Reggie yelled as he clasped his hands in front of his chest, beaming into the phone, "I can't believe my little bro has a DATE! I'm going to ask him ALL about it when he gets home; maybe we can even double date if Maylene says yes! Thanks for the information Drew!" the purple haired man waved joyously, giggling like a school girl, "Bye!"

"Wait! Reggie!" Drew called frantically into the fading picture of Paul's older brother, "Reggie!" but it was too late, the connection had been terminated, thus ending the call.

Drew cursed and was about to start dialing again when a disgruntled Ash and Pikachu ran into the room, both of them sweating bullets.

"Uh Drew," Ash started warily, "you might wanna run…"

Drew narrowed his eyes and stepped away from the phone, "What did you do this time?"

Ash scratched the back of his head and laughed nervously, "Well, you see, when I was trying to get Paul into the jacket, I might've kinda accidentally stepped on Pikachu's tail…"

"Pika!" Pikachu interjected hotly.

"… and he kinda Thunderbolted Paul… "

"Pika, Pikachu, Pika!" the yellow mouse glared at his master and huffed. It wasn't his fault his master weighed so much, what with all the ice cream he had consumed earlier that day.

"… and then Paul got really mad so he tied up Gary and locked him in the closet and now he's coming after us." Ash finished.

And as if on cue, a rather scorched Paul burst through the doors, Electivire by his side.

"KETCHUM!"

X—x—X

May, Misty, and Leaf crouched behind a bush outside the Seven Stars Restaurant, watching closely as numerous couples, young and elderly, passed through the doors into the fancy restaurant.

"Where is she?" Leaf hissed as she continued to scan the crowd of people.

Misty shrugged and checked her watch, "I dunno," she said, "Dawn's mom said she'd drop her off at 6:50, maybe it was traffic?" she suggested lamely.

May sighed and laid on the ground, "Ugh, we've been waiting for HOURS—"

"Correction," Misty interrupted, shoving her glow in the dark watch in May's face, "five minutes."

"—and I'm so HUNGRY!" May whined as she rubbed her growling stomach for emphasis. "Can't we go in and spy on them while we eat?"

Leaf and Misty exchanged looks and rolled their eyes in unison. "No May."

"Why noooot?"

"Because," Leaf started in an exasperated tone, "this restaurant is couples only from 6:30 – 9:00, and we're way too underdressed to go in there."

"But c'mon I'm so hungry! I need to go in there and stuff my face before I wither and shrivel like you guys!" May's whines got louder and louder and even more annoying every time she opened her mouth.

But before May's whines could be heard by those at the front of the restaurant, two pairs of hands clamped themselves over her mouth, preventing further speech.

Misty and Leaf glared at May, "The only way you're going in there is if you have a date," Misty hissed in the brunette's ear, "and I doubt some random guy will pop out of nowhere and offer to take you in there, so until that happens, suck it up and—"

Misty was interrupted by a rustle in the bushes to their left; the three girls turned their heads abruptly just in time to see a head of chartreuse hair pop out of the leaves.

"Oh, so it is you guys." Drew said as he observed the three girls. His head disappeared shortly after that, only to reappear a moment later, accompanied by the heads of Gary and Ash.

"Hey Mist!" was the first thing Ash said, Misty blushed a bright pink and mumbled a hello as the three boys popped in to join them in their little space behind the wall of bushes.

As soon as everyone was settled, they exchanged greetings and got down to business.

"So, you guys are here to spy on Paul and Dawn's date, right?" May asked.

Drew nodded, "Yeah, oh and you should really keep your voice down, June." He flicked his hair and smirked at May, "We could hear your obnoxious whines all the way from the pier."

May turned abruptly and balled her hands into tight fists, "Why you little—" Leaf hurriedly slammed a hand over May's mouth, but muffled curses and insults could vaguely be heard as May shook her fist angrily at Drew, who just smirked even more. "What was that, June?" he asked, mock confusion in his voice, "I'm a what?" May's glare intensified as she ripped Leaf's hand from her mouth, "I said, you're an arrogant a—" Once again, Leaf slapped her hand over the cursing girl's mouth, intending to keep the conversation strictly PG.

Misty rolled her eyes at May and Drew as they engaged in yet another 'Lovers Spat'. Couldn't they be in each other's company for at least two minutes without arguing?

"Oh, so I'm the uptight one? Last time I checked, you were the one with the pole up your—"

Of course they couldn't.

Wait a minute, the car that just pulled up in front of the restaurant looked familiar…

"Hey!" Misty whisper/yelled, "Dawn's here!" she gestured to the car, Drew and May stopped arguing and turned their attention to the car along with everyone else.

X—x—X

Dawn was not a happy camper.

No, not at all.

And apparently, it was easy to tell because her mother had been trying to cheer her up by telling supposedly 'funny' stories about the women in her Cooking club.

"Oh! And there's also this one lady, Wendy, she's a real joy to have in the kitchen, but she never pays attention to what she's doing! Like this one time, she mistakenly added a Persim berry to her Pecha berry Poffin mix while she was telling this story about her husband's trip to Johto, we all had a good laugh when her Rapidash spit out the Poffin because it was the wrong flavor, and poor Wendy didn't even know what she did wrong! And then there was this one time when Martha accidentally got flour in Debra's hair…"

Dawn had tuned out her mother a long, long, long, time ago. But not because she didn't enjoy the 'wonderful' stories her mother was weaving, oh no it wasn't that at all, it was because she was too caught up in her thoughts about him.

Ah yes, him, or that guy, commonly referred to as 'Sir Rudeness', who was otherwise known as Paul Shinji,

The King of Mean.

Paul Shinji, Dawn thought, was a rude, cold-hearted, Pokemon-abusing, jerk face who should spend the rest of his life rotting in the darkest pits of Hell, for he was a terrible person who trained his Pokemon beyond their limits and found joy in watching people suffer.

Plus, that jerk-wad forgot her name!

They'd only seen each other, like what, twenty million times before, and he didn't even have the decency to learn and remember her name!

The NERVE of some people!

Dawn huffed angrily in her seat, crossing her arms as her frown lines deepened. Oh great, now she was going to get wrinkles because of frowning so much at the thought of him, that's another for the 'Why I Detest Paul' list.

Grr, Paul.

She didn't know how he managed to do it, but every time they had seen each other, he had pushed all her wrong buttons. Calling her fat, telling her that she needed to shut up, making fun of how weak her Pokemon were (Which they WEREN'T!), suggesting that she take anger management classes, saying that she was too loud, insulting coordinators by saying that 'Contests were for prissy amateurs', calling her Troublesome...

Forgetting her name!

...Okay, maybe she was a little hung up on that.

But seriously, who does that?

Disrespectful people, that's who!

Dawn shifted in her position to stare at the passing greenery out the window. Judging by the amount of time she had spent brooding, she guesstimated that they were almost at Valor Lakefront, which meant it was almost time for her…

…date.

Whoop-dee-doo, she was so excited.

Not.

Dawn slouched and placed her elbows on her knees as rubbed her temples, all this negative energy she was emitting was quite unsettling, she was bound to be heading for bad karma if she didn't cheer up soon. So in a vain attempt to be optimistic, she racked her brain and tried to find the bright side to the situation.

...

…

…

…

…

Wow, this was harder than she thought.

Or maybe going on a date with him was just that bad.

"… and so she asked, 'Where exactly is the whisk?' and I sure didn't know, but then—oh! Dawn darling! We're here!"

Oh great, let the torture begin.

X—x—X

Paul Shinji wished his brother had never found out about modern music.

The reason was quite simple. Reggie was a terrible singer.

"Uh huh, yeah! Let's get this party on! Uh huh, yeah, yeah! Shake that stuff, move your body to the beat! Love the rhythm, feel the heat, dance 'til you lose your feet! Yeah, yeah! Party on! Yeah, yeah! Have some fun! Yeah, yeah! Lose control! Yeah, yeah! Dance some more! Let's get lost in the crowd, move to make the DJ proud, sing along to your song, nobody can tell you that you're wrong! Uh huh, oh yeah, that's right!"

Paul continued engaging in his previous activity, which happened to be banging his head repeatedly against the window. But he soon found relief when he discovered the song had ended and the radio station had gone on a brief commercial break.

Emphasis on 'brief'.

"Aaaand we're back with Mareep 5's latest single, 'Driving Me Up the Wall'! This song has been number one on PokeTunes for three consecutive weeks! Way to go Mareep 5!"

Much to Paul's dismay, Reggie's girlfriend, Maylene, who sat in the passenger's seat, decided to sing along.

"Oooh! Reggie I just love this song!" Maylene bounced in her seat excitedly, beaming at her boyfriend. "Let's sing it together!"

Reggie flashed a winning smile, "Sure thing babe!" he exclaimed while turning up the volume of the song that was just beginning to play.

And too further add to Paul's dismay, she too, was a terrible singer.

"Whoa-oh-oh! Yeah-eah-eah! Baby, baby, baby! Mhm! Oh yeah! My friends all think I'm crazy and frankly, I think they're right! Woo-ooo-ooo! I'm lying in my bed right now, staring at my clock. 2 in the mornin' still, but I haven't got no sleep at all because cluttering up all my thoughts is you, oo-ooo! Not really sure how it ended up this way, not really sure if I'm okay, not really sure how you'll react when I tell you the next day! You're wreaking havoc in my mind, and I'm not really sure what to do, oo-ooo! Yeah, you're driving me up the wall! Yeah, driving me up the wall! And I really can't help but love the way you do, oo-ooo!"

Paul let out another groan of pain as his ears were assaulted by the young couple's screeches. The song itself was already terrible, but what Reggie and Maylene were doing was beyond horrific. Those two were butchering the song so much that it was hardly distinguishable from a wild Pokemon's wails.

"OOOOH, YEAH!"

Paul slammed his palms over his sure to be bleeding ears. Arceus, those two were killing him! Couldn't they just—

"SHUT UP!"

Paul opened his eyes, rather surprised to discover that that voice was not his own. In fact, upon looking out the open car window, he discovered that the voice belonged to one half of a young couple standing just outside their car.

But before he had time to thank or congratulate them, the young man continued in the reprimanding of Reggie and Maylene.

"You are parked in front of a public restaurant; do you think you could at least respect other people's hearing by not blasting your music up so loud?" The boy scowled at them and stuck his nose snobbishly in the air. Flicking his hair much like Drew would do. "Honestly, learn some manners, you simpletons." And with those lovely words of advice, the young man whisked the smirking blond clinging to his arm towards the restaurant.

Silence didn't last long. Reggie and Maylene scowled at the retreating couple before turning up their music even louder, causing the couple from earlier to flinch and glare back at them. The two at the front of the car, however, pretended not to notice.

"Well Paul," Reggie turned around to face him, grinning like an idiot, "Let's GO!" he then pulled his keys out of the car (thus stopping the music, the couple from before, however, still shot them nasty looks as they entered the restaurant) and hopped out of it, along with Maylene. Paul did not follow his brother's actions. Instead, he sank lower in his seat and glared even harder.

"I'm. Not. Going."

Reggie was unaffected. "Of course you are Paul! He yanked open the car door and hoisted the brooding lavender hair teen out, "Come on! It's almost seven, and we wouldn't want to keep your date waiting!" Reggie then locked the car door and shoved the keys deep in his back pants pocket, thus assuring its safety from Paul.

Maylene skipped around and met them at the curb, "Yeah! I see Dawn over there! Let's go meet her!" the perky pinkette hooked arms with Reggie, who in turn, hooked arms with a glaring Paul.

"HEY DAWN!" Maylene yelled, gaining the attention of several people, along with Dawn, who had coincidentally just gotten out of her car. "OVER HERE!" she waved her free arm around wildly, and Dawn, who seemed a little embarrassed, slowly and reluctantly made her way over to them as her ride drove away.

"Erm. Hi Reggie, Maylene…" Dawn hesitantly glanced at the boy who was glaring at her, "… Paul."

"Hi Dawn! So great to see you!" Maylene chirped.

"Yeah! And I'm so glad you're going on a date with Paul! He's been a real bummer lately." Reggie added.

Paul looked away with a scowl, "Hn."

Reggie, however, would not tolerate such rude behavior from his younger sibling. "Paul!" Reggie hissed, elbowing his brother sharply in the side, "Be courteous!" Maylene glared at him also, mouthing 'Be nice' before she added 'or else' as an afterthought.

Watching as Paul and Reggie exchanged a few hushed words and venomous glares, Dawn fidgeted out of awkwardness. She hadn't known they were having company on their date, but she supposed it wasn't that bad, Maylene was good company and Reggie was always funny.

Paul however…

Grr.

The beginning of her mental rant was cut short, however, as Reggie pushed a scowling Paul towards her. Paul glared back at Reggie, but the older male just crossed his arms over his chest and nodded towards Dawn.

Sighing, Paul bowed his head and approached her with his hands shoved in his pockets.

"… Hi… Troublesome."

Dawn's eyebrow twitched, all shyness and awkward feelings melting away into one thought:

Oh.

No.

He.

Did.

Not.

"My name is not TROUBLESOME!" she screeched, balling her hands into fists, "It's DAWN! D-A-W-N! Learn it jerk!" she stomped on his foot with all her might and turned her back to him. Crossing her arms over her chest, she scowled harder than ever.

Behind her, Paul was experiencing extreme pain. When Dawn had injected her heel rather painfully in his foot, he let out a low yelp and clutched his foot in pain as he hopped up and down, creating a rather ridiculous scene. As he glared daggers at the back of Dawn's head, Reggie and Maylene snickered.

"What the heck!" Paul hissed as he gingerly massaged his throbbing foot, "What was that for?"

Dawn spun around and glared at him with just as much intensity, "Don't call me Troublesome! You could at least learn some manners and call me by my actual name!" The two quarreling teens engaged in a heated glaring contest as lightning practically crackled between their eyes.

Reggie chuckled merrily as he clapped the two on the shoulder and led them towards the restaurant, Maylene following. "Alright, alright, now that pleasantries have been exchanged—" he got a glare from both teens he was currently pushing, "—let's go in and have some fun!"

X—End Chapter—X

A/N: *wipes sweat off brow* Wow, that took FOREVER!

Seriously, I started this thing like, what, two months ago and 7,000 words was ALL I typed?

… I feel so ashamed.

Anyways, this is unbeta'd (Yeah, that's definitely not spelled correctly) so grammar/spelling mistakes are inevitable, but if you see any problems (with grammar/spelling) feel free to point them out for me.

Part two will be coming out soon (soon being 3 weeks to 2 months) so keep an eye out for it! (If you want to)

REVIEW!

(Remember, constructive criticism is WELCOME, flames, however, are NOT)