Zoro felt those stupid thoughts come back to haunt him again as he finished training.

Every single sensible bone in his body told him to just ignore the temptation, the foolish idea.

But that sweet orange colour… it had dug hooks into his soul.

And he was so hungry…

Surely Nami wouldn't miss just one fruit off those stupid trees, right? Anyways, better to risk her wrath than beg a snack from that stupid love cook. His eyes flicked to the orange trees, just a few feet away from him.

Using his considerable skill, he leapt to the trees, cut off a ripe orange, deftly caught it, and landed silently back on the deck. He bit straight through the skin, unable to hold back a quiet satisfied chuckle.

He had finally outwitted that damn witch.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" an unfortunately familiar voice rang out at him. Zoro turned slowly, caught orange-handed, to face an irate Nami.

He gulped. Years of experience dealing with the witch told him to run now, to just accept whatever ridiculous amount of money she would heap onto his existing debt. His warrior's soul, however, reared its foolish head.

"What's it to you? It's just an orange." Zoro flashed her an arrogant smirk.

For a moment, Nami's eyes settled on some far off point, clearly distracted. Zoro had never seen her need to think hard before taking revenge on him before; he wavered between feeling victorious and nervous.

Nami suddenly collapsed onto the deck, her eyes filling dramatically with tears.

"Oh, my sweet mother's oranges…" she wailed, voice trembling.

Zoro snorted, unimpressed with her theatrics. "Do you really think those fake tears are gonna work on me?"

Nami, a demonic smirk emerging from under her tears, replied quietly: "No, I guess that they wouldn't work on you."

And then he felt it again, that too-familiar feeling.

That spark, that flame.

That burning heat across the back of his neck.

Those feelings… letting him know…

That the damn love-cook had been behind him the entire time, and that he had set his leg on fire again.

Zoro swore as he turned, too late, to face a fiery Sanji.

"THE TEARS OF SWEET MAIDENHOOD MUST BE AVENGED!" Sanji shouted, the fires spreading from his leg to his entire body

Nami giggled quietly.

Remember, assumptions make an ass out of u and some dude named mumptions.