I literally woke up with this in my head this morning. I've got plenty of ideas, so if you want more, let me know. Raoul will be dropping in from time to time, so expect him when you see him. Hope you like it!
Oh, and I don't own any of the Phantom characters.
DR. LOVEJOY: Hello, Erik. I'm Dr. Lovejoy, your new psychiatrist.
ERIK: …
DR. LOVEJOY: Feeling sullen today, are we?
ERIK: …
DR. LOVEJOY: Well, we both know why you're here, don't we? The judge ordered you to spend time in therapy after the Don Juan incident, during which you may or may not have burned down the Opera House, depending on which version of you we're dealing with. Today, I thought we'd start with—
ERIK: It's called Don Juan Triumphant, thank you very much.
DR. LOVEJOY: Pardon?
ERIK: My opera. You got the name wrong.
DR. LOVEJOY: Ah, my mistake. And how does that make you feel, my getting the name wrong?
ERIK: …
DR. LOVEJOY: So you're just going to sulk again?
ERIK: …
DR. LOVEJOY: This is getting us nowhere fast, Erik. I may call you Erik, right?
ERIK: Actually, I would prefer to be called "Monsieur le Fantome."
DR. LOVEJOY: Why?
ERIK: Because that's the image of my inner badass. And it just sounds cooler.
DR. LOVEJOY: So you have several names?
ERIK: Yes.
DR. LOVEJOY: Mm-hm. *makes note on clipboard* What are some of these names?
ERIK: Well, there's "the Phantom."
DR. LOVEJOY: *mumbles as writes* …deranged sociopath…
ERIK: And "the Opera Ghost," or O.G. for short.
DR. LOVEJOY: …extortionist…enjoys intimidating others…
ERIK: What?
DR. LOVEJOY: Nothing. Please continue.
ERIK: Right. *glances suspiciously at clipboard* There was "Angel of Music," I really liked that one…
DR. LOVEJOY: …God-complex…
ERIK: All right, what are you writing?
DR. LOVEJOY: Just taking notes. Keep going.
ERIK: I was "the good genius" for a while.
DR. LOVEJOY: …egotistical…narcissistic tendencies…
ERIK: I was on display as "the living corpse," but Schumacher changed that to "the Devil's child," I have no idea why.
DR. LOVEJOY: …obsession with the macabre…But what do you call yourself?
ERIK: Usually just "monster."
DR. LOVEJOY: *scratches out "narcissistic tendencies"* Why do you call yourself "monster"?
ERIK: Well, doc, look at me.
DR. LOVEJOY: …
ERIK: What?
DR. LOVEJOY: I'm just confused. Which version are you supposed to be, because some of you are just God-awful—no offense meant—
ERIK: None taken.
DR. LOVEJOY: And some of you don't even look that bad.
ERIK: You must be referring to the Sunburn of Doom…that is pretty bad for my street cred. People don't seem to think the hunky, slightly mutated me is all that scary. They actually seem to like it…They think it's sexy…
DR. LOVEJOY: And is this a bad thing?
ERIK: *spazz attack* Erik isn't supposed to be sexy!
DR. LOVEJOY: I see. *makes note* Do you often refer to yourself in the third person?
ERIK: Not all the time. It depends on the version.
DR. LOVEJOY: How many versions of you are there?
ERIK: Well, including all the phanfics, there's…*attempts mental tally*…quite a few.
DR. LOVEJOY: That must be very confusing.
ERIK: Pssht, you have no idea! Just one me is hard enough to sort out, but now I've got to deal with how many me's with how many issues? And people wonder why I crashed that stupid chandelier! *sniff* It's just too much to cope with…
DR. LOVEJOY: *pats Erik on the shoulder* That's why I'm here, Erik.
ERIK: Don't touch me.
DR. LOVEJOY: Right. Sorry.
R & R, if you'd be so kind. Thank you!