Title: Stay With Me
Author: worldwnomirrors
Pairing: Callie/Arizona
Rating: PG

Summary: My take on the last scene of 7x18 and what happens after that. Callie is certain Arizona proposed right before the accident, but why hasn't she brought it up? Sofia's life is hanging by a thread - Arizona's worst fear about having kids has come true. Because of all this, Callie is scared, wondering if Arizona will really stay.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. All characters belong to Shonda Rhimes and ABC.

AN: (PLEASE READ) So, I am trying something new here and would like your opinion on it. I wrote this in second person, meaning I refer to Callie as "you". I did this because I realized that this way it would be easier to get both of their feelings in there without changing the point of view all the time. And I would like to know what you guys think of it, because I am about to start writing a new longer fic, and I am thinking of writing it like this. I am still torn though so if you guys hate this, please tell me you hate it and why. And if you love it - great, let me know that too. After I have read what you guys think, I will start figuring out how to wrote the other story. Thank you! I hope you like this one!

STAY WITH ME

Your eye lids are heavy. They've never been so heavy before, and you're wondering why it is so hard to open them and why you feel so exhausted, why your body won't move, why you can't open your mouth to talk even though you're really, really trying.

Your body is sore. You feel pain in various places all over, but most of all, you are exhausted.

You're not scared. No, just frustrated. Really, really frustrated because you want to call out, you want to talk to someone and know what's going on.

But you are so tired. So unbelievable tired, which also frustrates you. It's a new kind of tiredness, unlike anything you've ever felt before. It's because of the tiredness, the utter exhaustion, that you can't seem to move even a finger. You want to talk to someone but you don't have the strength. You try again, but your body betrays you and you fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.

The next time you wake up, you are still tired, but you feel like you can give it another try to move. You frown and then slowly manage to open your eyes.

You know she's there before you see her. Before you open your eyes, you know she's right there by your side. Maybe that's why you weren't scared the first time you woke up, because you knew she was there. You really should have been scared, you think. Or maybe you are even too tired to be scared. You don't know.

She's touching you – some part of her body is touching you. She's sleeping. She's sitting on a chair, her head resting on her folded arms on the bed, right next to you. She doesn't know you're awake yet. She doesn't know you're okay, that you're going to live. If she knew, she would be smiling at you, kissing you really carefully, telling you everything that had happened.

You want to talk to her. You want to move, you want to touch her. Even though you don't remember why you're here or why you're so tired, you know Arizona is worried about you, and you don't like it when she worries. You want to spare her that, so you try again to move, and you're finally able to lift your fingers.

Apparently you aren't moving them enough, because Arizona remains unmoving. You sigh and then open your mouth to try and call out to her, but nothing comes out. You squeeze your eyes shut in frustration and a tear runs down your cheek.

You get scared now, because you don't know what is going on and you can't seem to communicate in any way, which leaves you right where you are. You try to remember, you try to recall the last thing that happened before you woke up here, but it's all fuzzy.

The baby shower; there was a baby shower, and you remember bits and pieces of it. And then you think you were in a car, but you're not sure. But then you remember your gift to Arizona, the weekend at the bed and breakfast. You wonder if you ever even got there.

You cry, and try to just make any noise or movement so that Arizona will wake up. You decide you need more strength. You close your eyes, breathe in deeply once, twice. Opening your eyes again, you manage to almost say her name.

"Ariz-"

And then you start to cough slightly and you realize how dry your mouth and throat are.

Arizona's head immediately snaps up at the sound of your voice. She looks at you as if you had been dead and just came back to life. She's shocked, and you don't know why.

"Callie?" She says your name as if she is unsure it's really you, and it makes you feel uneasy, it bugs you. It's one more thing that you don't understand. "Oh god, Callie, you're awake," she says. Her voice is shaky and she grabs your hand as if to prevent you from going anywhere.

Funny, you think to yourself. Like you could.

She's so relieved you're awake that she wants to cry, but she keeps it from coming, wanting to stay strong for you, needing you not to worry.

"What," you choke out and then swallow – it's like a freaking desert in your mouth. "...Happened." It's meant to be a question, but you can't find the right tone of your voice so it comes out as a statement.

But Arizona understands. "You don't remember?"

You try to shake your head, but it's hard, your skull feels so heavy. "No," you manage to say instead.

She holds your hand in both of her own, softly stroking her thumbs over your knuckles. "What's the last thing you remember?" she asks.

You frown and try to remember more, but you can't, so you say, "Car."

She squeezes your hand and nods as tears form in her eyes. "Yeah. We were, um..." she trails off and looks down at your joint hands. She doesn't know how to say this. It's hard for her to talk about, because she feels guilty. "We were fighting. I wasn't looking, and there was a truck..." she trails off again and suddenly you panic, because you can see that truck and it's coming right toward you and Arizona.

You remember looking at her, and then looking forward, seeing the truck, gasping and then everything goes black. But then you remember bits and pieces. Lying on the hood of the car, riding in the ambulance. You remember Arizona holding your hand and talking to you in the ambulance while the paramedics worked on you. She was so afraid. You recall the way her voice trembled while she tried to calm you down and you recall her face – dirty and bloody, a big cut on her forehead. You remember arriving at the hospital, seeing everyone's shocked, petrified faces.

You flinch and pinch your eyes closed as it all flashes into your mind and you realize how seriously hurt you must have been.

"What's wrong?" Arizona asks as she moves a little closer. She's worried, still, or again, you don't know. "Where does it hurt?"

Inside your head, your mind replays the whole car ride and you remember what was said, what was done. Or you think you do. You're not sure if all of it is real, but it does feel like it is.

Then, you panic again as you realize something.

No.

Your eyes fly open and you desperately try to lift your hand to your belly. Your eyes fill with tears and your gaze falters across the ceiling as the panic really settles in.

You know already, you can feel it even though you can't reach.

There's nothing there.

Your baby isn't inside you anymore.

You try to scream, and you manage to turn your head and look over at Arizona, pleading with her to help you. You want to get up, you want to run to wherever the baby is, but you know you can't, so you panic even more. And you can't scream, you can't talk, all that comes out are loud groans as the tears fall recklessly down your face.

"Baby," you force yourself to say. "Baby."

You need her to tell you. You need to know your baby is okay.

"Yes, yes, the baby is alright," she says. "They had to take her out. She's in the NICU, Mark is with her."

You feel a small amount of relief, but you still need to know more about the baby's condition to calm down completely.

"He's always with her," Arizona continues. "Unless he's here seeing you, but then I'm with her. Someone's always with her."

Her? So you had a baby girl... You acknowledge it, but let it go because it's not important. You just want to know how the baby is, whether it's a boy or a girl.

"Calliope," Arizona says softly. "I need you to try and calm down for me, okay?" She nods and smiles weakly. "You need to rest, your heart needs to rest."

"No," you protest. You don't want to rest. You don't need to rest, you need to see your baby. "Baby," you repeat. "I want..."

She brings a hand to your face and tenderly caresses your cheek. "I know, I know. But you can't see her right now. You need to wait a little, okay?" Her voice is soft and soothing, but you can't relax.

"No," you protest again. "The baby. Tell me."

The more you talk, the more you feel like you can talk. But you are getting increasingly tired, which only fuels your frustration because you shouldn't normally be getting more tired this quickly after you woke up. Only, right now, you're not really normal.

"Okay, I will tell you," Arizona says, "but you have to promise me you will try to calm down, alright?"

You nod as best you can. "Try. Tell me."

She takes a deep breath and you study her face closely as you listen to her talk. "She's very small. But she's strong, and if she's anything like you, she will be okay. She has a brain bleed, but it's only grade one and for now, she is stable." She looks at you, her eyes shining with sadness. "She will be okay, Callie. She will. And when you're better, you can see her. Everything's going to be okay."

#

"How is she today?" you ask eagerly as Arizona comes back from the NICU.

She smiles weakly at you and sits down next to you on the bed. "Still stable."

You close your eyes and exhale in relief. "Stable. Good." You nod and then open your eyes and look up at Arizona. "Pictures?"

"Oh, yeah." She picks the phone up out of the pocket of her white coat and then you both look at the pictures together.

It frustrates you to no end that you still have yet to meet your baby. You understand why, you do, but it doesn't change the emptiness you feel and the fear that she might die before she even gets to know you are there.

It's been five days since you woke up, but it feels like an eternity ago. For all you know, it might as well be weeks, months. It has been the longest five days of your life and you are so impatient.

Something else has been bugging you. The first day after you woke up, Arizona stayed with you. She was there when you fell asleep and she was there when you woke up. But you got stronger fast, and when you did, she stopped being around as much as you wished.

The two of you don't talk. Well, you talk, but you don't really talk, and you feel like something is wrong. She's different around you now. She doesn't look into your eyes the way she used to and she doesn't touch you the same.

She proposed to you. In the car, right before you hit the truck, she proposed to you. You know this. You are certain of this. But she hasn't said anything about it, and you are afraid she regrets asking. So you haven't said anything either.

And it makes perfect sense to you that she would regret it.

There is a child. A small, little child; a baby. Your baby. Arizona's baby. You and Arizona are the mothers of that baby. Before – actually only a year ago – Arizona didn't want a baby. She didn't want a baby because, she knew better than anyone that babies and children can get really sick, and she didn't want to experience that with a child of her own. She was afraid, because there was always the possibility of something happening to the baby, of losing the baby.

Now she has a baby, and that baby is sick. So maybe she wants out. And the fact that Arizona isn't related to Sofia by blood, means she could, if she wanted to, just up and leave.

This thought scares the living hell out of you. Except for Sofia, you love Arizona more than anything. You want her in your life, you want her to be the mother of your baby, you want her and you and Sofia to be a family.

And you want her to be your wife. You want to spend the rest of your life with her.

"I have to go," she announces. "Keep my phone so you can look at the photos," she suggests.

"Oh," you utter, disappointed she's leaving already. "You can't stay?" you ask as she stands up.

"No, sorry babe, I really have to get back up to peds."

You search her face. You search her eyes. You search for any kind of sign of anything, anything that will let you know she loves you, anything that will let you know she will stay with you.

But she doesn't make eye contact with you.

"I'll go check on Sofia on the way," she lets you know as she starts walking backwards out of the room. "See you later."

"Arizona?" you call desperately to her before she has a chance to turn around.

Tears form in your eyes and you just want her to come over and hold you, even if just for five seconds. "Will you, um..." you trail off, struggling not to cry. You don't want to cry, you don't want her to feel sorry for you and you are afraid of letting her know about your insecurities. "Will you come by later?"

But she sees the tears in your eyes and she hates it, she hates seeing you like this. She feels so guilty, but she doesn't know what to do.

She walks back to you and gently strokes her fingers across your scarred face. "Yes," she whispers, and then she reaches down and gives you the softest of kisses. "Of course I will." She stays with her face close to yours and you look into each other's eyes for a moment. You desperately want to ask if she wants to take what she said in the car back, you want to say something, but you don't. You are too afraid. So again, you search her eyes for answers, but you don't find any. You keep gazing into her crystal blues for as long as she allows, for as long as she looks back at you.

"Okay," you say, still looking at her.

She doesn't break eye contact until she reaches down and kisses the tears away from your cheeks, then whispers, "I love you."

You nod and bite your lip, trying not to cry any more. "You too," is all you manage to get out. You usually don't like saying that, you want to say the whole thing, you want to say, I love you too. But you can't because if you do, you will break, and you don't want her to know how scared you are.

You think she means it. You are sure she means it. But she loved you before, and she left anyway. What says that she will stay this time?

Nothing. Nothing, really.

#

She comes in every day, a few times, and she talks briefly to you but she doesn't touch you. She never touches you. Sure, she gives you quick kisses and she holds your hand for short moments or pats you comfortingly on the shoulder, but she doesn't really touch you.

She looks tired. She looks so tired, every time you see her. You wonder where she sleeps now, if she sleeps at all, but you don't ask, afraid she may say something you don't want to hear. You are concerned about her. You are afraid, wondering why she isn't with you as much as she should want to, why she's so distant, but you are also worried about her.

Every time she leaves, you cry. You manage to hold it together when she's there, you never really cry in front of her, but when she leaves, you break down. Mostly because she never stays long enough for you to muster up the courage to talk to her, she never gives you a chance. And also because you miss her. You miss her so much it hurts.

This day, and it's day nine after you woke up, she sits by you when you wake up. She hasn't been there when you've woken up in so long. Now, she's on the chair that's always standing next to your bed and she's holding your hand. You feel this before you see her and you immediately clasp her hand, holding it as tightly as you can, willing her not to let go.

"Hey," she whispers softly as your eyes flutter open.

You stretch and groan a little, still pretty tired. "Hey," you reply hoarsely.

"How'd you sleep?" she asks as she brushes her thumb over your knuckles.

You look down at your joint hands, willing her not to try and let go. It feels nice, her hand in yours, and you don't want it to stop.

"Are you okay?" she wonders and scoots a little closer when you don't answer.

You look up at her as you realize you got lost in your own thoughts and in the sensation of her actually quite close to you and still holding your hand.

You want to shake your head and scream that you are, in fact, not okay. You want nothing more than to tell her and talk to her, but you are still too afraid of what she might say.

"I'm, yeah, I'm fine," you instead quickly assure her with a slight nod. She looks at you like she doesn't believe you, but before she can ask, you are already talking. "How's our baby?"

Arizona smiles. "She's good. She's fighting, just like you." She squeezes your hand, letting you know she's proud of you.

"Can I see her soon?"

You know the answer already. But you're going insane missing her and worrying about her. Every day you're scared. It takes you hours to fall asleep at night because she's always on your mind so you can't relax.

"Callie..." Arizona starts, her voice sad and her smile fades.

"Yeah," you say bitterly. "I know. Whatever."

You're angry. You're angry at the situation, you're angry at yourself for not putting the god damn seat belt on and you're angry with Arizona because you think she's leaving you, she just doesn't have the heart to do it now that everything is so messed up so she's waiting. This is what you think. This is what you are quite sure of and it pisses you off. How can she do that to you?

"Callie, come on," she pleads apologetically, "you know I would let you see-"

"Would you?" you snap as you spin your head around to fix her with a hard stare. You know you are being ridiculous, you know she would indeed let you see Sofia if she could, but you are so angry that you just make up reasons to lash out at her.

She looks back at you in disbelief as she tries to wiggle her hand out of your grasp, which only causes you to hold it even tighter.

"No," you protest. "You can't leave." You shake your head as you blurt out the words. "You can't leave."

Her jaw drops open a little at that as she considers your words. "I'm not leaving," she says with determination. Tears form in her eyes and she sniffles. "I know you're frustrated, and I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going through, but what do you want me to do?" she asks, and she sounds a little angry now. When you don't answer, she continues. "Do you want me to take you to her even though hers and your health both would be at risk?"

"No, of course not!" you yell.

"Then what, what do you want me to do?"

Tears are now streaming freely down Arizona's face, and this time it's you who jerk your hand out of hers. But you don't say anything. You know she's right, you knew this before you even started arguing. But even though you know this, you are still angry.

You realize she simply doesn't want this, she doesn't want things the way they are now. And even though it infuriates you, you can't stop her. So you turn away, and you say, "Nothing."

You hear her sniffle, but you don't see her. Normally, you would want to throw your arms around her and make her feel better, but you don't feel that way now.

"As soon as she's better-"

"Just go," you interrupt as you turn your back to her. As much as you miss her being there with you, you can't stand having her around right now, not when you think she really doesn't want to be there.

"I said I'm not leaving," she points out.

"I don't care what you said, I don't want you here."

This hurts Arizona, but you are too angry to realize. This hurts her immensely. She wants to be there with you and she's been trying, but she feels so guilty about what happened that it's been hard for her to even look at you, let alone touch you. She wants to, but she's afraid that you're blaming her too. She doesn't feel like she deserves you.

So she leaves. She does as you say, because who is she to protest if you don't want her around?

She doesn't come back. All day, she doesn't come back. You don't even see her walk past outside your room. At first, you're relieved. Then, you get angry and then you get scared. You did this. You made her go away. If she was doubting that she wanted to leave you, you've really given her a push in the wrong direction now.

You're too proud to ask anyone if they've seen her though, so you don't.

You don't sleep that night. Not one minute do you sleep, and you feel so incredibly alone. You miss your baby. You've had her with you for months, and now you haven't even been in the same room as her for one and a half weeks. Arizona left and didn't come back and you wonder if she's gone for good. Granted, your mind is reeling and you are panicking.

#

The next morning Mark comes to see you and he gives you an update about Sofia, whose condition is slowly improving.

"She waved at Arizona earlier," he says. "I think she recognizes her."

A lump forms in your throat. "You..." you trail off and take a deep breath, needing it in order to keep from crying. It seems like crying is all you do these days. "You saw Arizona? Today?" you ask, a little too surprised.

"Yeah, she was in the NICU," he says casually before he realizes that the tone of your voice suggests you are worried or that something is wrong. "Why?"

"I just, I haven't seen her... Since yesterday." You look up at him. "... Morning."

"What?" he asks in disbelief. "That's crazy. I know she's been busy, but she can't have been that busy."

You sigh. "We had a fight," You concede. "I said some things..."

"Do you want me to go find her?"

You shake your head. "No."

"I know she really wants to be here Callie, she's probably just ashamed or something," Mark suggests.

"No. She doesn't want to be here Mark."

"Torres, she loves you," he whispers and leans a little closer to you.

Tears form in your eyes as you shake your head again. "No," you whimper. "Or maybe she does, but that hasn't stopped her from leaving before. She doesn't want this, Mark. She doesn't want a sick baby, that's why she didn't want kids in the first place. And she asked me to marry her, you even said she told you that she did, but she hasn't brought it up again. Why do you think she hasn't done that, Mark?"

"I'm sure there's an explanation for that. If you just talk to her about it-"

"She never gives me the chance!" you yell, but your anger and frustration isn't directed at Mark. "She's never here anymore. She comes by and stays just to give me an update on Sofia and then she's out the door."

"Do you want me to talk to her?" he asks sympathetically.

You sigh in resignation. "No," you say calmly. "Thank you for offering, but no."

"It's gonna be okay," Mark assures you, but you're not even sure he believes that himself.

"Yeah," you sigh, but you don't believe him.

"I have to go Callie, I'm sorry," he apologizes.

"No, I know, it's okay. Thank you for stopping by. Could you come back later, if you have time?"

"Yeah, of course."

He kisses you on the forehead and once again tells you that things will be okay. He leaves, and yet again, you are alone.

You are so tired, but you can't sleep. Your heart is constantly beating too fast from anxiety. You wish Arizona would just walk through the door. You don't know what you would say, but you just want to make sure everything is okay, that she will stay with you. You feel weak and pathetic, but you need her, and you need her to stay with you.

And she does come through the door, but instead of making things better, your world is about to fall apart even more.

"Callie," Arizona calls as she comes inside and she walks over to you on the bed, but she doesn't sit down. Instead she stays on her feet and to your surprise, she takes your hand in hers and holds it tightly.

"Arizona, I'm sorry I yelled at you," you start, eager for her to know how much you need her, that you won't accept her leaving you. You are going to tell her. You don't usually do this, you don't usually beg and plead and it won't be good on your badass-ness but you don't care.

"Callie, don't worry about that, we're okay," she tells you.

You frown in bewilderment but then you realize the seriousness on her face and the pain in her eyes. "What? What's wrong?" you ask, and you start to panic.

She brings her other hand to yours to hold it with both her own. "I need you to not panic, okay?" Too late for that. "Your heart is still weak so I need you to stay calm. Can you do that for me?"

"Arizona, wh-what's going on?" you ask, now extremely worried. "Is Sofia okay?"

"Can you stay calm for me?" she demands again.

You open your mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. You shake your head, because you're already not calm, you're terrified. "I don't- Arizona, please, just tell me what's wrong." Tears sting your eyes and your heart beats even faster than before. "She's okay, right? Sofia? Nothing- nothing happened to her? It's something else, right?"

Arizona tightens her grip on your hand and slowly shakes her head. "She's in heart failure, she needs surgery."

You stare up at her as you struggle to take in what she just said. "No, no," you protest and you look away, trying to gather your thoughts. Turning back to look at Arizona, you repeat, "No! I haven't even touched her yet, she can't die." You feel your throat constrict and it gets hard for you to breathe. "No, no, no, Arizona, no." You shake your head and look at her pleadingly, willing her to tell you this isn't actually happening.

"Calliope, listen to me," she commands softly. "She's not going to die. Okay? I won't let her. Stark said I could be in there while he performed the surgery, so I won't let anything happen, okay?"

You nod as tears stream unstoppably down your face. "O-okay," you stutter, struggling not to panic. You need to stay strong, if not for yourself, then for Sofia.

Arizona brings one hand to your face, stroking her palm from your forehead and back over your hair. "Try not to worry too much."

You breathe, and you are really, truly trying to stay calm but your tears never stop.

"And you know what else?" Arizona asks and musters up a weak smile.

You shake your head, unable to believe that there was anything to smile about right now.

"Once I'm in the OR, I can call you and let you know how it goes," she says. "If you want to, I will do that."

Your chin quivers as more tears fall from your eyes. You look away and shake your head. "I don't- I don't know if I can handle that. I can't just wait, but I don't know..." you trail off, bringing your free hand to cover your face. "I don't know know. Just... Tell me this isn't happening, please."

"It will be okay. Look," she says as she grabs your wrist, pulling your hand away from your face and making you look at her. "I'll have my phone with me, and I'll text you when the surgery starts, and then you can call me if you feel like you can handle it. I'll talk to you for as long as you need."

You look into Arizona's eyes, and they're glistening with un-shed tears. You search her face again. You don't doubt that she cares about you and about Sofia, but you're wondering if the fact that she cares is making this all too hard on her. And you're wondering if maybe it's not, maybe she wants to stay with you because the way she looks at you right now says that she's by your side forever, that it's never even crossed her mind to ever leave you.

She caresses your face again and you just keep staring into her eyes. You want to say something, you want to ask, and you want to do it now, even though you know it's the worst timing ever.

"Arizona-"

And then her lips are on yours. It's rough, but at the same time not. It's soft but desperate, and you need this. She hasn't kissed you like this since before the accident. You yank your hands out of her hold and take her face in both your hands, keeping her lips pressed firmly against your own.

You're crying, and you stop kissing her for a mere second so you can breathe. It's a ragged, shaky breath, but as soon as your lungs get enough oxygen, your mouth is on Arizona's again.

You have missed this. You have missed this so much and you don't want to lose it.

There is so much at stake and you don't know what to do with yourself. You hold on to Arizona for dear life, the closeness of her the only comfort you can find right now.

You feel her deepening the kiss by discreetly sucking your bottom lip in between her own, but then she pulls away, but remains close to your face. She rests her forehead against yours and you both leave your eyes closed, as you breathe each other in.

Arizona pulls away further but you are still holding on to her face so you pull her back to you. "Not yet," you whisper. "Please, just stay with me for another minute." You feel like you need to hold on to this moment, because you are not sure when or even if you will get the opportunity to be this close to her again.

She nods against your face. "Okay."

You bite your bottom lip and swallow in an attempt to stop the tears from coming. "She's my daughter. I love her," you choke out.

"I know. I love her too." She pulls away just slightly now so she can look at you. "And you," she says. "I love you."

You look into her eyes, and you can see it, you can see the love, but you still don't trust it. You try to swallow the lump in your throat, but it won't budge. "You promise?"

Arizona looks at you sadly. "Callie-"

You cut her off. "You promise?"

"I promise." She emphasizes both words. "Don't ever doubt that I love you. Never."

You nod and you start to wonder how much tears one body can hold as more start streaming down your face. "Okay."

She touches your face again. "I have to go."

Oh, how many times you have heard her say that in the last ten days. Even though this time is different, very different, because she is leaving to be there for your baby when she's being cut open. But even so, it hurts you when she leaves.

"Can you come back after?" you ask shakily. "And stay for a while? Please?" You look into her eyes, willing her to say yes. "No matter what happens, can you, please, just... Stay with me?"

Her heart breaks when you ask her this because not until this moment has she realized how little she has been with you after you woke up. And she's horrified that you feel like you have to plead with her to stay, even though she knows why and that it's her own fault. According to herself, this is all her fault.

"Yes," she says. "I will stay with you for as long as you need." And she will. You asked, you pleaded, and she can't say no. If you feel like you need her, then she will stay because she will do anything for you. You just don't know this.

"Thank you," you choke out.

She gives you a quick kiss. "They're taking her into surgery real soon, so I'll text you in just a while, okay?"

"Okay. Thank you."

She takes a deep breath. "Okay. See you later. Everything's going to be fine, okay? She's going to be okay," she reassures you.

When Arizona leaves, you close your eyes, but that doesn't stop the tears from escaping freely from under your lids. You are so, so tired. Not only is your body still in the middle of healing, but you haven't slept in over 24 hours and your baby is going in for heart surgery. You can take it, you can, and you will, because nothing will stop you from getting better so you can finally see Sofia. But it's tough, it's hard on you, being in bed like this 24 hours a day, not functioning enough to even stand on your own two feet.

About 20 minutes pass before Arizona texts you, telling you the surgery has begun and that so far, it is looking good. That means it's been going on for a little while, but you're not angry with Arizona for not texting you right away. This way, you know that at least the start is good.

You're debating with yourself whether or not you should call, but it's hard to decide. You're thinking that if everything goes fine, it will be great for you to talk to Arizona during the whole surgery so you will worry less. But if it goes badly, you don't know what you will do. If something goes wrong, it's better that you don't know it until afterward, when hopefully it has been fixed and Sofia is fine.

But you don't know how it will go, so how can you make a decision?

Clutching the phone, you text Arizona back, saying you don't know what to do, so you will just wait until the surgery is done, because that seems like the safest choice. You're also asking her to please come right back to you after, even though she already said she would.

Not even one minute later your phone buzzes and you read Arizona's message.

I absolutely will.
I won't let her die.
Try not to worry, please?
I will see you soon.
I love you.

She won't let her die. You hold on to that, close your eyes, and pray.

#

"She pulled through!" Arizona practically squeals as she rushes back into your room about an hour later.

You just look at her as she struts over to you with a smile on her face. You take her words in, too afraid to believe them at first.

"She's okay," she assures you as she sits on the bed next to you.

You bring a hand up to cover your mouth in order to stifle a sob. "Really? She's okay?" you choke out.

"Yes," she announces with a sigh of relief. "The surgery was flawless. She's in recovery right now and she's strong. She's strong."

You close your eyes and rest your head against the pillow as you exhale in relief. "Oh my god."

She's okay. Sofia is okay, and Arizona is there with you.

You look at her. She's looking at you. Then she leans down to kiss you. And then she pulls back and looks at you again as she strokes some hair out of your face.

You're crying. Still, or again, you don't know.

Arizona looks at you like she's trying to read you, like she's trying to figure out what you're thinking. "What's wrong?" she asks as she lovingly caresses your face with the tips of her fingers.

The question surprises you. You're not sure why, but it does.

"Nothing."

She doesn't believe you, but she doesn't ask again. She gazes at you for a while, and then she says. "I'm sorry." Tears form in her eyes, but before you can ask, she continues. "I haven't been here. I haven't been here for you, and I should have. I've just been..." she trails off and looks away. "I just, I haven't been here. And I should have been. I'm sorry."

This gives you hope. You don't like the fact that she looks so sad, but this makes you think she's not leaving, because that doesn't sound like leaving to you. Or maybe you're just grasping at straws, maybe you're just holding on to any potential hope that comes your way.

You take her hands in both of yours and bring them to your chest. "Are you here right now?" you ask, and it may seem like a strange question because hello, you are talking to her and touching her so she's obviously right there – but you want to know if she is actually, really there. As in, mind and soul, there. You think she is.

And she knows what you mean. "Yes," she says. "I'm here."

"Are you staying?"

She nods. "Yeah. Unless you want me to go, I am staying."

You shake your head and whisper, "I don't want you to go." Your voice is breaking and tears fall from your eyes.

"Then I'm staying," she promises.

You feel so relieved. You're crying again. Again. You are so god damn tired of crying, but you can't do anything to stop it. Clutching Arizona's hands in your own, you gasp for air as you sob.

"Callie, what's wrong?" she asks again, softly, as she searches your eyes. You see pain in hers, and helplessness. "Please, talk to me," she pleads.

You still gasp air into your lungs, unable to control your crying. "I'm- I'm scared," you stutter.

"Of what?" she asks sympathetically.

"That you'll leave."

"Honey, I told you I'm staying," she says in confusion.

"No," you say, shaking your head. "I mean, leave leave."

She looks shocked as it dawns on her what you mean. Then she shakes her head too as tears quickly start to fall from her eyes. She squeezes your hands and scoots closer to you. "No," she says, her voice trembling. "No, never. Callie, baby..." she trails off, horrified, kicking herself internally for allowing her insecurities to cause you this pain on top of everything else. "I'm not leaving you. I'm not." Pulling one hand out of your hold, she brings it to your face, placing it on your cheek, stroking her thumb back and forth over the wet skin. "God, I'm sorry. I'm such an idiot."

"You don't want this," you say, finding her words hard to believe. "You didn't want a baby and now she's sick, and that's why you never wanted kids. And you haven't been here. You've been away almost all the time, never giving me a chance to talk to you. You don't even spend the nights with me."

"I know, I'm sorry," she says, trying to come even closer to you. "But Callie, this is what I want. I just, I haven't been thinking, I don't know what I've been doing, I've just been scared and... If I had realized you thought I was leaving, I would have-"

You interrupt her, because you need to say this too: "You asked me..." you trail off, choked by your own tears. "You asked me to marry you," you finish.

Arizona's chin drops a little – obviously she didn't think you remembered this.

"And you..." you trail off again. God, it is so hard to talk while crying. "You never brought it up again."

Then, she pulls both her hands away from you, following them with her eyes and putting them in her lap,.

Your chest constricts, you get scared. She just pulled away from you. You think to yourself that you should have expected that, but you didn't. Now she looks like she is ashamed. You don't know why, you don't even know what's happening right now, all you know is you're panicking, yet again, and you don't know what to do.

She wants to take it back. She regrets saying it, is what you are thinking. And you are quite sure that this is true, because it would explain why she has been so distant ever since you woke up after the accident. And you don't think about everything she has just told you, that she loves you and that she isn't leaving you. No, because that just doesn't make sense. It doesn't fit with the way she's been acting for the last ten days, but this does. The fact that you think she regrets asking you to marry her, that makes sense.

"No, no, you can't do this," you protest; loudly, desperately. "You can't ask me to marry you and then take it back." You're yelling now. You're furious and disappointed and broken and scared, so you're yelling. "You just, you can't do that."

"What?" she asks, and she sounds shocked to you, but you ignore that.

"You can't do this to me," you say, again.

You have no idea how this happened, you feel like you have no idea how you got to this place. Even though you know that you in fact actually do know, it feels surreal and somehow you just don't understand.

But then...

"I don't want to take it back."

You are about to keep yelling, because at first you only hear her talking but you don't actually know what she's saying.

But then you stop and look at her. She's crying, and she's not saying she's sorry, she's not saying that you are right – she isn't saying anything right now. But you heard her say she doesn't want to take it back. Yes, you are quite sure that that's what she said.

And she reassures you. "I don't want to take it back."

You don't understand. In this moment, nothing makes sense to you.

"What?"

You feel so confused.

She says it a third time. "Callie, I don't want to take it back."

You frown as you study her face, and you are just completely lost right now. You don't say anything, because you don't feel like you can produce any words and even if you could, you would have no idea what to say.

"I'm sorry, I just..."

You didn't think it was possible for you to get anymore confused, but you were apparently wrong. Why is she apologizing? She doesn't want to take it back? She doesn't want to take it back and still she's apologizing?

Without saying anything, you are pleading with her to explain, to help you understand, to make everything better.

She moves a little closer to you again. "Callie, after the accident..." she trails off and shakes her head, looking away. "I didn't know how to live with myself," she says. "I didn't know if neither you or the baby would live, and then you both did and I thank god for that every minute of every day." She looks at you again, fresh tears falling from her eyes. "But I felt so guilty, I still feel so guilty and I didn't know how to look at you, knowing it was my fault."

If your head was clearer and you weren't so completely and utterly confused, you would protest because it wasn't Arizona's fault. If it was anyone's fault, it was yours. But you have a hard time taking in what she is saying to you, you have a hard time believing and registering, because this isn't what you expected.

"I love you," she whispers. "But I couldn't ask you to marry me when I could barely be in the same room as you because of what I did. I didn't think you remembered that I asked."

You are just staring at her. You've heard her, you have, but you need a minute to really take it in, to get your mind back to normal. You need a minute for the panic and the fear and the anger to melt away.

"I'm sorry," she says again, and you need to think for a second before remembering what she is apologizing for.

But you are still unable to talk. You've stopped crying, you're just simply staring right at her, but you can't talk yet. Too much has happened to you, too many difficult emotions have been forcing themselves into your system at the same time, but now, you just feel numb. You are aware that what she just told you should make you happy, but it doesn't. No, you don't feel anything. You're drained. It's like your body and your soul couldn't take anymore, so you've shut off.

You can't deal with this right now, you can't. Somewhere deep inside you know Arizona will be broken if you don't say anything, but you don't have the sympathy right now and you can't feel her sadness the way you always otherwise can.

"Callie, please," she cries. "Say something."

You can't. You don't know how or what.

"Do you want me to go?" she asks brokenly.

You shake your head. "I-I, I don't- I don't know," you stutter, and you really, truly don't know. Your mind is blank.

Arizona thinks this is her cue to leave, to give you some space. "Okay. That's okay," she mumbles and sniffles, unable to make eye contact with you. "I'll just, um, leave and come back, later. Okay?"

"Yeah," you reply, your voice flat.

And she leaves. She glances at you quickly but then turns and walks out of the room.

You fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.

#

When you wake up later, she's there. And again, you know this before you open your eyes, and this this time she isn't even touching you.

You don't open your eyes right away. You stir and take a deep breath and as you do, you hear Arizona move in the chair she's sitting in. When you do open your eyes, you meet hers right away. She's looking at you. She's not crying, but you can tell she's sad.

You feel clearer now. Your head isn't that much of a mess anymore, and you're almost not scared.

"Hey," she whispers softly.

You don't answer. Instead you look at her hands as you reach out for her to take the one hand you're extending. She does. She places her palm in yours and then you both hold on tightly. You look into her eyes, searching her face again.

"You really don't want to take it back?" you ask in a low voice.

She shakes her head slowly. "No," she says. "I just... I didn't think you would... After what happened, I didn't think you would say yes."

"I didn't think you wanted to ask me anymore."

She shakes her head again and moves to be closer to you, placing her other hand around the hand she's already holding. "I'm sorry," she whispers.

"It wasn't your fault," you then quickly point out and you shake your head too. "The accident, it wasn't your fault."

"I wasn't looking. If I had been looking-"

"If I had been wearing my seat belt, I would have been fine." You look intently at her, needing her to know that you don't blame her. "If you had a part in it then so did I. Let's not talk about who's fault it is. We didn't mean for it to happen. You're okay, I'm going to be okay and Sofia is alive and that's all that matters."

You just look at each other for a little while, and Arizona nods her head slightly.

"I love you," you whisper as tears form in your eyes.

She looks into your eyes for a moment as if trying to figure out if you really mean it. "I love you too," she then says. "I love you so much. God, Callie, I've been so scared. For you, for Sofia. And I'm still so scared."

You nod in agreement. "Me too. But we're okay, right?" you ask, still not completely sure. "You and me, we're good, right? I mean I'm not angry with you, and-and you're not leaving or anything?" You tighten your hold of her hand.

Arizona stands up and reaches down to kiss you. She moves one hand to your face and holds your hand with her other. Her lips press carefully onto yours a couple of times as her fingertips tickle your cheek. Opening her mouth a little, she let's her tongue brush over your lips. "We are good," she says. "And I wouldn't dream of going anywhere if it's away from you. Never again."

You pull your hand from hers and cup her face, pulling her in for more kisses. This time, when she opens her mouth, you eagerly open yours too, taking her tongue in between your lips to move against your own.

"I missed you," you tell her, still holding her face close to yours.

She closes her eyes. "Sorry." She can't stop feeling guilty.

You shake your head. "You're here now. And we're okay, so it's all good. But just, don't stop kissing me."

She shakes her head and smiles weakly. "I won't."

And she doesn't. She keeps kissing you, softly, lovingly, until you feel like you just want to hold her. You just want her chest against your own, you want to smell her hair and feel her breath against your neck because you haven't done that in what seems like forever, even before the accident.

"Hold me," you say quietly. Without another word, she lays down in bed next to you and takes you into her arms, holding you so close to her. You nuzzle your face into the crook of her neck and inhale, smelling her scent. You press your lips twice to her neck before you whisper, "You smell good."

You relax. Finally, you can relax. You are still worried sick about Sofia, but at least you and Arizona are okay, so you don't have to worry about anything other than your daughter anymore.

After some time, you pull away to look at Arizona. "I want to marry you," you say.

Her face lights up but tears also form in her eyes. "Yeah?"

You bite your bottom lip and nod. "Yeah."

#

An eternity passes by, at least that's what it feels like to you. It's weeks, a little more than two months now since the accident and you have been going completely and utterly insane with frustration that you still have not seen your daughter. Every day you drive Bailey crazy as you beg and nag about seeing your baby and every time she says no, you get angry. You know why, you are painfully aware why exactly you cannot see Sofia, but it doesn't make it any easier.

This day Arizona walks in with an unusually big smile on her face, but you are still cautious to hope too much. The woman invented the word perky, hence the almost constant smiling. So you do not jump to conclusions.

"Arizona, please, please tell me that I can see her today?" you plead desperately.

If possible, her smile grows wider. "Yes!" she announces.

You stare at her as she sits on the bed next to you.

No, wait, what? Did she just say that?

"What?" you ask, terrified you'd heard her wrong.

"Yes," she repeats. "You can see her today." She takes your hand and squeezes it in reassurance.

"Really?" you ask, a tentative smile forming on your lips, still disbelieving.

She nods. "Yeah."

You bring your free hand up to cover your mouth as tears blur your vision. "Oh my god," you say. "Oh my god."

She nods again and leans down to kiss your forehead. "Bailey's getting a wheelchair right now and then I'll take you to the NICU."

You drop the hand from your face and take a deep breath as the tears of joy fall from your eyes. "You promise? You're not, you're not messing with me or anything because I will kill you if-"

Arizona brings her fingers to your lips to stop you from talking. "Calliope, honey," she starts, "calm down. I am not messing with you. You're going to see her today, I promise you."

You only nod as more tears fall from your eyes and you smile a ridiculously big smile. You can't say anything, you're so overwhelmed and excited and, oh my god, where is Bailey? You need that wheelchair now.

"Hey, by the way," Arizona continues, "I'm offended. Like I would ever lie to you about something like that." She winks playfully at you as she smiles and squeezes your hand.

You laugh at that, because you know this already, and she knows you know.

"I can't wait for you to see her," she whispers as she smiles at you and tears form in her eyes.

You smile back at her, big, as the tears keep streaming down your face. "Me neither."

After only a few minutes, Bailey comes in with the wheelchair and Arizona immediately helps you into it and then wheels you off in the direction of the NICU. That section of the hospital has never felt further away before.

Your heart keeps beating so hard in your chest with anticipation and you feel like Arizona isn't pushing you fast enough.

"Faster," you say, and you do sound quite as childish as one could imagine.

Arizona chuckles. "I'm not going to race you through the corridor, Callie."

You lean your head back so you can look up at her. "Just a little? Please?"

"No!" she exclaims. "Look, you're gonna get there soon, it's not that far."

"Are you kidding? My baby is on another floor than me!" you point out in fake anger as you bring your head up. "I have never seen her and you won't race. Now that's just not cool, babe."

Arizona sighs, but she smiles. She knows you are partly kidding but that you at the same time are partly dead serious. You are aching to see your baby and she knows this better than anyone, next to yourself.

Taking a look around, she checks to see how many people are around, and as it turns out, the corridor is fairly empty. Besides, the elevator isn't that far away. So she pushes you quickly forward once, and then her legs start moving faster. She jogs to the elevator and you laugh out loud because Arizona is actually running with you in the wheelchair, but also, you are seeing your baby in just a few minutes.

You are happy.

"You call that racing?" you mock playfully as you enter the empty elevator.

"Thank you for running me through the corridor, Arizona," she says, but really means that's what you should have said. "Why you are welcome Calliope." She pushes the button for the fifth floor.

You lean your head back again and smile widely up at her as she looks at you. "I'm gonna see her." Your smile widens even more.

She strokes your cheek as she smiled back at you. "You are."

But then your smile falters as you realize something. "Can I hold her? I can hold her, right?" you ask in desperation. "I mean, my hands and fingers aren't completely back to normal yet but I think I could do it, and-and, you will be there, so you could-"

"You will get to hold her," she cuts you off and the smile instantly reappears on your face.

"Yeah?"

She nods. "Yeah."

The doors slide open and if possible, your heart beats even faster now as Arizona rolls you toward the NICU. It's close now, it's really close. You've seen your daughter in pictures and on video, but you haven't seen her in real life and you haven't touched her. Oh god, you're going to touch her. You're going to hold her. You can't believe the moment is finally here.

You feel the emotions taking over you, and tears come to your eyes. Somehow, Arizona notices because she puts her hand on your shoulder. You instantly put your hand on hers, needing her not to let go. She squeezes your shoulder, letting you know she will keep her hand there.

When you reach the NICU, you have to put the pink gown on first and you wonder why on earth everything is taking so long. Going to the NICU took forever and putting the damn gown on is taking forever.

As Arizona finally wheels you into the NICU, you reach for her hand again and she places it in yours, holding on tightly. You look around the room at all the babies in there but they are so many, you can't see where Sofia is.

"Over here," Arizona says as she motions toward the window where four babies are lined up in their respective incubators.

Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres, you read on one of them, and your heart is about to pop out of your chest. You look inside and you see her. It's your daughter. Your baby. Your flesh and blood, and she is so beautiful. She's so little but she's got thin, black hair and big, brown eyes. You sob uncontrollably and reach out your hand to her to be as close as you can. She's small, she's very small, but her eyes are open and her hands are flailing.

You are so overwhelmed and relieved and happy you feel like you are about to burst. You can't touch her soon enough, you can't hold her soon enough, she can't see you and know you are there soon enough.

"I want to hold her, Arizona, I need to hold her," you whisper desperately through tears, never letting your eyes off the baby. Arizona squeezes your hand and then goes to pick hers and your daughter up. You watch as her hands carefully slide under the tiny, tiny body, picking her up. She looks so light, and she's so little you bet Arizona could hold her in just one hand.

"Oh my god," you choke out and cover your mouth with your hands. Arizona holds the baby close to her chest as she walks over to you.

"Hey my little baby, you're finally gonna meet your mama," Arizona whispers as she looks down into Sofia's tired baby face. You don't miss the fact that she said "my baby", and that makes you all warm inside. She looks at you and she smiles brightly, rocking your daughter softly in her arms. "Say hi to your daughter," she says as she bends down to hand her over to you. You hold out your hands and Arizona slowly puts the small body in your arms.

Suddenly the rest of the world disappears and you feel like you are finally whole. Sofia has been missing in your life, she's been the lack of your completion, but now you have her, she's in your arms. Your daughter, your baby, your child.

Your arms are trembling a little and you realize you're not going to be able to hold her for too long. You are still not fully recovered, but you struggle and you're determined that you will hold her for a little while, at least.

You are smiling, you are laughing, and you are crying. "Hey," you manage to say as you tuck her closer to your chest. "I've missed you, so much," you stutter, the tears streaming down your face.

You bring her closer to your face so you can nuzzle your nose into her little neck to feel her scent. That baby smell, you love that baby smell, and you love it even more knowing that it's your own baby. She smells sweet, and warm and perfect. You feel that you will remember this smell forever. You feel her skin against your own, and she's so soft and warm and it's your own flesh and blood. She is yours. This perfect little creature is yours.

Lowering her again, you look into her dark, warm, little eyes and she looks back at you. "Hi," you say. She reaches up with her hand to touch your face and you kiss the teeny fingertips when they meet with your lips.

You don't really notice, but Arizona kneels in front of you, puts her hands on your knees and studies your face. She's been waiting for this moment, she's been waiting for you to finally be happy and maybe stop worrying a little. She studies your face and hopes she will see you like this a lot in the future, the happiness practically radiating from you.

She slides her hands up to your thighs, squeezing softly. You glance at her quickly and she giggles softly at you and you giggle back, feeling ridiculously happy and content. There are tears in her eyes, but you know they are tears of joy.

Sofia fuzzes a little and you immediately shift your focus back to her. "Oh I'm sorry baby, what is it?" you ask as you rock her gently. You place your hand on her forehead and stroke back across her head of dark, thin hair. She reaches up with both of her hands and grabs your index finger and your thumb, squeezing them tightly with her tiny, tiny, little fingers. "You probably don't recognize me, because I haven't been with you since you were born, but I never stopped thinking about you, not one second. I've missed you terribly. But we're going to be together now and I love you so much, okay?"

"She recognizes you," Arizona counters, and you snap your head up to look at her again.

"Yeah? You think?"

She nods. "I do." She nods again but this time towards Sofia. "Just look at her. She knows who her mama is." You do, you look at the baby in your arms. She lets go of your thumb and reaches up that hand to your face, poking at your nose. You smile again as you think that maybe Arizona is right, but at the same time you realize something, and you look back to your fiancé.

"Her mamas," you say.

Arizona's eyes water yet again and she nods at you and smiles, knowing that if she talks, her voice will crack and she will start crying, and she doesn't want to. She wants to just enjoy this precious, precious moment.

"I love you," you whispers as you put your right hand on her left.

She turns her hand so that her palm meets yours and clutches your hand in her own. "I love you," she says.

"We have a baby." Saying it out loud causes fresh tears to come to your eyes.

Arizona nods again. "We do."

"And we're getting married."

She laughs heartily and then smiles at you. "We are."

You look at Arizona for a little while longer and then look back down at Sofia. "You want to go to your mama Arizona a little while?" you ask the infant in your arms.

"What?" Arizona asks in bewilderment, confused as to why you wouldn't want to hold her anymore. "Callie, you don't have to-"

"I know," you cut her off as you look at her. "But do you know what I've been longing for almost as much as holding her?"

She considers that for a moment but then shakes her head. "No."

New tears form in your eyes yet again. "To see you with her."

This is true, and even though your arms are tired, that's not why you want to hand Sofia over to Arizona. You truly just want to be able to look at the love of your life with your baby in her arms. They are now your whole life.

Arizona just stares up at you, and she's so grateful for what is right in front of her. It's you, the woman she loves, and your baby. Hers and your baby. And Mark's, yes, but Sofia is just as much Arizona's child as she is Mark's and yours. And right now Mark isn't there and you are quite content with that because you just want to spend time with the two people you love more than anything in the world, and that's Arizona and Sofia.

Arizona nods. "Okay," she whispers. "Let's go sit on the couch." She reaches up and kisses you, then kisses Sofia's little head before she wheels you over to the couch in the back of the NICU.

"Can you get into the couch while holding her or do you need me to take her?" Arizona knows the answer to this question already, but she wants to ask you anyway, she doesn't want to make your decisions for you.

"Can you take her?" you ask, a little embarrassed for some reason. You hate being this weak, you don't like it at all, even though you know Arizona understands better than anyone.

"Of course," she says as she reaches down to take the baby out of your arms. She studies you carefully as she slowly lifts the baby up and into her embrace, afraid to make you sad by taking Sofia, even though you said you wanted her to.

She sits on the couch as she cradles the infant in her arms, but she keeps looking at you, but you don't look at her, you look at Sofia.

"Hey, you okay?"

You snap your head up and look at her. "Yeah," you say, and you truly mean it. "I'm perfect." You smile brightly and then start to stand up on shaky legs.

Arizona reaches out her hand to give you support and you take it. Normally you would tell her you were okay and didn't need the help because you don't want to need any help, you want to be good on your own. But now, nothing matters except for the little girl in Arizona's arms, so you don't care. And you know it will be easier anyway if you accept her help, so you do, because you could care less about your ego right now.

You slowly sink down into the couch next to your baby and girlfriend as you watch them intently. "Thanks," you say as you slip your hand out of Arizona's, and she just smiles at you in return.

Taking a deep breath, you press your side into Arizona's and drape your arm loosely around her shoulders as you watch her silently interact with the baby. You smile widely, you feel so happy. Your heart swells with pride and joy and you are not quite sure if this is even real, because it feels better than you ever thought possible.

Sofia looks up at Arizona with wide, exploring eyes and Arizona looks back at her as she strokes her little head. "My little girl, I'm so happy you finally got to meet your other mama," she whispers, and you think your heart will explode with love for this woman. She leans her head down and brushes her nose against Sofia's and Sofia reaches her hands up and grabs hold of Arizona's hair. "Oh, yeah, look at that," she says and giggles at the baby.

Looking into Arizona's eyes, you find nothing but adoration and you don't know how you got this lucky. Despite everything that has happened, you feel lucky. This moment is perfect and your life feels perfect.

She looks at you and smiles, and you just look back at her, and you can't believe how it's possible to love two people this much. "I'm so happy," you whisper, your voice almost cracking. "Everything is perfect and I'm so happy."

You rest your head on Arizona's shoulder and she kisses your forehead. "I'm happy too. So thankful that you both are alive and doing good."

And it hits you that you could have missed all of this. You could have died, or Sofia could have died.

You could have missed this.

You pull away from Arizona to look at her and Sofia again. When she turns to you, she has a frown on her face. "What?" she asks.

"Nothing," you say. "Just... I just want to enjoy this. Enjoy looking at you two. You and Sofia are my life now and I just want to take a moment to be thankful too. So I just want to look at you for a while."

She nods. "Okay."

You feel as though you could die right now. You have everything you have ever wanted, and it's better than you ever imagined. Maybe it's because you went through so much to get here, you don't know. All you know is, you are so happy right now that you feel like you don't need anything else the world could offer you.

Your whole life is right in front of you.

And you are completely and utterly happy.