Chapter 1

July 14, 2010

"The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again."
Charles Dickens

Edward Cullen

"Fucking shit! Come on! That call was bullshit!" I yelled at the TV and pointed my finger at it like it was an actual person I was scolding. I'm normal I swear.

I sometimes got made fun of for how much I got into the game, but damn…the shit got me worked up.

I got passionate about two things in life; my work and sports.

My work and sports pretty much summed up my life. It was sad, really, but oh well. I got money, I got excitement, and I ate food. Some people would kill for my life. Sometimes I felt like killing for any other kind of life (figuratively speaking of course), but that was beside the point and it only brought out the melodramatic side of me that was often kept hidden.

Life is a bitch and you just have to get over it, a good friend once told me. Well he was actually my best friend. He's also the one sitting next to me on the couch glaring at me with his arms crossed over his chest thinking he's all elitist and shit. He hated baseball. He hated all sports except for football, and that season had long ended, but was starting up soon. I didn't really know why I was his friend. Actually, I did know. I loved the guy, but we barely had anything in common.

"You need a hobby." He said a matter-of-factly and got up from the couch. He waltzed away with his arms swinging out by his sides.

"Fuck you, Cooper."

"You better watch your mouth before I tell your mom." He called.

Bastard.

I was a momma's boy, I was not even going to try and deny it, but my mom was pretty strict even though I was thirty-five years old. If she found out I swore, she would slap me upside the head and tell me how much swearing goes against intelligence and all that fuckery. I think I was allotted the right to swear. I had a MBA and Ph. D in business management, I owned my own business, and was a professor at Harvard University at the young and ripe age of thirty-five. Swearing was a recess for my brain.

"Vegas, Coop. Vegas." I said as a reminder.

Not much else had to be said. Blackmail between friends never got old. He knew what that meant and he let out his own string of expletives as he left the room to probably grab another cup of coffee. It was eight at night and he was still drinking coffee. He drank coffee a lot; so much so that I always associated the smell of coffee with him. I told him that once and he laughed at me for days.

I brought my attention back to the game and watched as some player from the other team, that I didn't really care about, tried to hit the ball. He looked like a four year old swatting at a piñata. (Not really, I'm just bitter) I could have been there at that game, but Cooper didn't feel like going out. Wednesday was my designated night out and I thought spending it with my best friend that I barely saw because of work sounded like a good idea. He was a picky bitch though and didn't want to go to the game because of unknown reasons.

I could go to any game I wanted to. I bought myself the season's tickets as soon as they went on sale. I sold the ones I didn't use online, and I got a lot of money from that. Let's just say I was well off. I just didn't really do much with my earnings. I didn't have anything or anyone to spend the money on, really. I never was one for material things. As a kid, I found joy in playing outside, getting into trouble, and having my face buried in a book for most of the day. I was the classic nerd in that way, but man did it pay off.

I never really indulged on much. The only things I indulged on were my condo and my car. I was brought up right. I didn't use my money for stupid shit. I didn't do drugs, I drank a little, but not stupidly, I had no wife, no kids, no nothing but a shit load of money. I felt bad having it though. After I started the teaching job at Harvard, I took fifty percent of both of my paychecks and sent them anonymously to charities. I didn't need the money, so why harvest it? At this rate in my life, I would have no heir to take my money after I died, so there was no need for it really.

I looked over my shoulder and looked out at the wall length windows out to the city. It was always beautiful at night, even if it was raining or just foggy.

Boston had been my home since the day I was born. I moved away for a couple of years to live in Seattle for my high school years, but that was during a tough time in my life. It's always tough when your parents separate and you are forced to leave the only place you knew as home to live a new life without your father or brother around as you were phasing from a boy to a man with only a mother around.

"Your kitchen is disgusting." Cooper said as he walked in, cupping his mug in his hand blowing softly into the cup.

I rolled my eyes. He always bitched at me about how messy my kitchen was. The rest of my house was spotless except for the kitchen. I just hated cleaning it. Plus, Cooper usually cleaned it when he came over so it was all good.

"Your face is disgusting." I said off handedly.

That was us. We always made fun of each other. It was in our nature. Our friendship started because of the need for the both of us to just rash on the other.

He sat beside me again and took a small sip of his coffee. I was sitting there wearing a pair of my grey sweatpants and a Harvard sweater, and he was there dressed like he was going to an interview. He wore perfectly dry cleaned black slacks and a white button up shirt with a blue bowtie. The only thing that threw the outfit off were his lion slippers. He kept them at my house for some reason and loved to wear them. I bought them for him as a joke for his birthday, but he seemed to like them.

"How did your date go last night?" He asked.

I rolled my eyes. "Stupid. I think she was a hooker."

He choked on his coffee and I slapped him on his back a couple of times just to be fucking nice.

"Excuse me?" He asked.

I shrugged. "Either that or she was just a straight slut."

"I thought you met her at the bookstore. You met a hooker in a bookstore?"

"Apparently. She had her tits practically hanging out of her shirt, her feet never left my crotch as we ate dinner, and her tongue was down my throat when I was trying to drive her home. Or to her brothel. Who the fuck knows." I took a sip of my beer and shook my head at the memory. It was a disaster much like many of my other dates.

"Aw Edward, don't judge her like that. Maybe she was just lonely and wanting to get some."

"Maybe, but she wouldn't have given me a starting price once she got her hand in my pants."

"Ew." He gagged. "I hope you gave the little guy a nice washing after those hands had been on it."

I chuckled and rolled my eyes. Only Cooper would be thinking about my dick's hygiene after I went on a date with a prostitute. Typical doctor. I was used to my dates turning into complete busts though. Story of my life.

"I take showers daily, Kobza."

"Good." He shivered and took another sip of his coffee. I shook my head at how he had his pinky up and everything. He was sometimes unreal in his actions. I called him Spongebob often just because he seemed like a cartoon character to me I don't know why. Why did I choose Spongebob? Because he was the shit. "You sure know how to pick 'em, Edward."

"Yeah I know. I don't need the whole 'you suck at life speech' right now though. Spare me, please."

He laughed. "You should just start playing on my team." He said with a shrug like it was no big deal.

He said it like I could just wake up one morning and say, 'I would like to be gay today' and skip away and go on with the rest of my day like that. Yeah, no. I was not going to play on his team ever because I did not like men in that way and I never ever would. I obviously had no problems with anyone who did play on that team. Hell, my best friend was gay.

I snorted. "You wish."

He cringed. "I wouldn't touch your stuff with a ten foot pole."

"Great. Now I can't even get the gays to like me."

"As a matter of fact, a lot of the boyfriends I've had were rather fond of you. The problem isn't people liking you." He got that voice that told me he was about to give me a lecture.

Oh the Super-Duper-Cooper lectures as I liked to call them. I felt bad for any future kids the guy had. His lectures were always very interesting, extravagantly delivered, and completely right. It was annoying.

"A lot of people like you. You are very charismatic; you are just too picky with what you want. You're too structured and if one girl has an attribute that you don't like, you are completely turned off."

"That is not true." It was very much true. I was just trying to make myself seem a little less like a fucking two year old who couldn't make up their mind about what snack to have, the fruit snacks or fruit bar. Oh there I go comparing women to food again. Maybe that was why I was still single.

"Exhibit A." Oh here comes lawyer Cooper. There were many sides to that guy. "Kerry Levine. You dated her for a week—a record for you I might add—and then she goes to your house and puts her bare feet on the coffee table. You never called her again after that night,"

"Well that was just rude. Imagine what other rude tendencies she could have had hidden."

He completely ignored my argument and continued. "Exhibit B. Lauren Mallory. You dated her once, called me the next day and told me you were in love. You go on another date, she starts talking about how she hates all Boston teams and thinks sports are a waste of money and time, and you all of a sudden hate the girl."

"You forget she called me a mindless bastard." I pointed out. That was a good argument. Insert internal fist bump here.

"Yeah, after you told her she was bitch for thinking like that."

Shit. He was always right. "Oh well."

"You need to loosen up, Edward. No girls like a tight ass."

I put my hand over my mouth to hold in my laugh. "And gay men, what do they like?" I asked. I couldn't help it. He knew I was only joking. It was too easy to joke around with him and it brought on lots of laughter.

He gasped and slapped me on the shoulder in that way he did. "You are disgusting."

I keeled over on the couch and clutched my stomach as I laughed. I only laughed like that once every few months or so, and man did it feel good when I did.

I only joked around like that around Cooper and my family. Maybe that was also a part of my problem. When I met someone new, I treated them like I did when I was working, which was disciplined, focused, and completely wary about them. I had caught many motherfuckers trying to cheat me out of millions and having to cut down my workers. I hated firing people. It was the worst part of my job, and most of the time I worked to make sure that I would never have to fire someone.

That also meant I had to hire the right people as well. That's where my skepticism came in as well. I did thorough background checks on all of my potential employees and they went through various interviews with some of my assistants and then finally with me where I made the final decision. I had a good detection of bullshit, and that helped me immensely with my job and it's a part of what made me so successful.

Although, having the poker face visible for most of the time, meant I didn't really have that much fun per se. I loved my job. I lived for my job. I loved seeing the smiling faces of my workers when my company scored a new deal because of me, which meant more money in their pockets. I loved making the assholes in the industry fall to their knees and feel like shit. I loved that what I did helped many others and I made enough money to donate to charity. That didn't even include the joy I got from teaching. In a way, my life was fulfilled more than many other people, but in a way, it was completely empty. I had no one to share the joy with.

But I did have Cooper and an amazing family, so I guess that counted for something. I just couldn't help but notice that something felt missing.

"You know what I think your problem is, Edward?" Cooper said thoughtfully.

I got up and wiped the tears from my eyes from me laughing at him. "What?"

"You are too much of a man."

Well that's the first time I had ever heard something completely stupid come from Coop's lips. "Pray tell, how does one become too much of a man?"

"Well maybe that came out wrong. What I mean is, you treat everyone else as if they were a man."

The guy was fucking insane. That didn't even make any sense. I just took another sip of my beer trying to pretend like he wasn't right.

"Woman like romance. They like a little sensitivity. They like a man who will spontaneously give them flowers or read them poetry. They like talking about their feelings, not about whether or not the Red Sox won the latest game. Women don't like guys who treat them like guys."

"Jeez Kobza, maybe you should turn straight since you know the ladies so well."

He rolled his eyes. "Don't be jealous that the ladies like me and not you."

"You like me. You act like a woman sometimes."

"You're right. I do. But that's different. I may be a feminine gay, but I am still a guy. I have the same plumbing as you do."

I rolled my eyes. "I treat women right. I open the doors for them, I…I do a lot." I honestly couldn't think of anything else. I still didn't completely agree with Cooper though. I would treat a woman right. I would probably read her poetry and shit, but that wasn't my problem. My problem was I was never given the opportunity to show a woman I could treat them right because the right one hadn't come along. "I'm not going to change who I am." I finally said.

He sighed and placed his coffee on the table in front of us. He turned towards me and gave me that serious and compassionate look with his blue eyes that everyone always commented on. They were really, really blue. They were also really, really intimidating. I hated it.

"You don't have to change the way you are, Edward. You are fine the way you are, I am just saying, maybe you should start thinking about what woman want and stop thinking there is this perfect woman out there that will fulfill all of your expectations. That doesn't happen in real life." He said bitterly and turned away.

I felt bad right then. I knew that wasn't true. I knew many couples that would also argue against that, but Cooper didn't have a very nice history and I couldn't find it in me to tell him he was wrong.

His parents divorced when he was fourteen. He was just starting to discover that he was in fact gay, and when all was said and done, he was sent to live with his mother. After three years, he knew for a fact he was gay and he told his mother. His mother was fine with it. He was happy. Then three years after that, he went to go see his father who he hadn't seen after the divorce. I went with him to London to find his father, since we had been good friends for a while by then. I remember laughing hysterically at Cooper as he commented on how hot British men were and he quickly fell in love with the place. And then we met with his father and when he told him about his preferences. I thought his father would be like his mother; completely understanding. I was wrong. His father punched him in the face and told him he should be ashamed of himself. He told Cooper, my caring and good best friend, that he didn't consider him his son anymore.

He didn't love the city that much after that.

It took me months to get him out of his little state of depression. I hated seeing him so beat up, but whenever I wasn't at school or working, I was trying to get Cooper to smile again and say inappropriate things about hot guys he saw in the streets. It took a while, but I got him back to normal.

Then he fell in love. He fell completely in love with a guy named Julio and he had never been so happy. I met Julio many times, and I agreed that he was a good guy and I thought they were perfect together. I was wrong. Turns out Julio cheated on Cooper numerous times throughout their relationship (with both men and women mind you) and Cooper was once again devastated. At that point, I was pissed the hell off and I beat the shit out of that fucker. He didn't look so hot after I was done with him and that was the first time I was arrested. It was worth it.

So between his parent's divorce, his father's reaction, his doubt that true love existed, and his failed attempts at finding 'the one,' Coop wasn't much of a believer in someone being happy with the same person for their whole lives.

I wholeheartedly disagreed with him.

My parents were proof that true love could withstand the test of time and of problems. Yes, they separated when I was fourteen. Yes they lived on complete opposite sides of the country for four years, but my mom and dad, no matter what they thought, never stopped loving each other. I lived with my mother those four years while my brother, Emmett, lived with my father. I missed my father and brother terribly during that time, and because of that, I turned to focus on school. As I looked back, that time was crucial to my success in my later life.

My parents reunited on my graduation day. My dad brought Emmett with him to watch me walk across that stage and ever since then, my parents haven't separated. Yes they still fought…quite a lot actually…but they loved each other. They have also been through a lot since then. That was proof enough to me that there was going to be one person that would love you and that you would love back no matter what the hell happened in life.

"You'll find someone you know." I said and patted my best friend on the back. I didn't like that he doubted happiness so much. It bothered me.

"Yeah sure." He said and picked up his mug again. "Ortiz just struck out." He said.

My eyes snapped to the TV and sure enough… "Fuck off!"

July 15, 2010

"Tell him I need to reschedule that meeting to a later time. I have a meeting with corporate this morning that can't be held off." I said into the phone as I tied my tie at an expert speed while looking in my mirror. I always thought I should enter a tie-tying contest. I would win for sure.

I went with a red tie that day. I accompanied it with my white button up shirt and dark grey suit that Cooper bought me for Christmas. Most of my wardrobe consisted of suits and sweats. There wasn't really a go between. I only had three pairs of jeans that I were worn when I went out to social events, which wasn't often. Most people hated wearing suits and business clothes, but I liked it. It was what was comfortable to me.

"Edward, you know he will not be happy about that." Jessica said nervously.

Jessica was my intern/assistant and she was constantly on edge about everything. She was a hard worker though, so I kept her around.

"Just remind him that I don't need his partnership, and he knows that. Also remind him that I am the one doing him a favor." It was simple logic, really. I finished tying the tie and I flipped the collar down and smoothed the front of my shirt down. Cooper was good at ironing.

"Alright." She said and I could hear her gulp through the phone. She would get used to the confrontation and negotiations. She was a college student and the actually confrontations aren't really something they can teach. I would give her time. "See you soon."

"Bye, Jess." I said and ended the call.

I put the phone in my pocket before pulling the suspenders over my shoulders. I turned looking at the mirror to my stomach. I always felt the suspenders made me look fat. I wasn't of course, but still. I picked up the suit jacket and folded it over my arm. I stumbled out of my room and to the kitchen to grab my shoes. I never really put them away. My shoes were always scattered around the house and I didn't know why I didn't just put them away. It was just a habit I guess.

I put the jacket on as I made my way out to my car. My baby. My silver 2010 Jaguar XJ. She was barely a month old and I was in love. It was very fast. I liked very fast things. Saved me a lot of time.

Starbucks wasn't far away from my place and only minutes from my office building. I knew it would be a stressful and busy day, so I needed my coffee. As usual, there was a huge line, so I took out my phone to look at some of my notes. I had four meetings that day and there were a lot of things I had to remember to talk about.

I owned my own computer company; Robot. Yes it was a little bit of a strange name, but to me it made more sense than Dell or Microsoft or Apple…really? Apple? What the hell did that have to do with technology? Anyway, my company was slowly making its way up there as the most profitable company in America, but I wasn't really one to brag.

The place was full of noise from people all around. Behind me I could hear a child crying and when I looked back, I saw it was because their mother was paying more attention to the laptop then at the toddler. The kid noticed me looking at him and I stuck my tongue out making him stop and laugh. His mother didn't even look up. I didn't get that. I was never one to really want kids, but I knew if I had one, I wouldn't ignore it like that. Isn't a child's laugh to best sound to a parent? What is this world coming to?

Some man was talking loudly into his phone behind me and he sounded way too happy for someone who was out at six in the morning. I tried to block everything out and looked back at my notes on my phone and even added a few more. As I got closer to the front of the line, someone caught my attention. It was the woman standing in front of me in line.

"Why is this shit so complicated? I just want a coffee, not a fenti extravaganza." She mumbled under her breath, causing me to hold in a laugh. There was something about crazy people talking to themselves that just tickled my funny bone. Alright, I know that made no sense, but it does in my head. Anyway, the woman, she had her hand over her mouth and she was swaying from left to right slightly. I couldn't see her face, but her little tantrum was funny and rather cute. "Oh my God." She seemed stressed out and unaware that she was actually speaking aloud. She was speaking low, but I could hear her. "Shit I'm next."

I couldn't just let her suffer like that. I leaned forward and whispered in her ear. "What do you want?" I asked. I couldn't help but notice how good she smelt. I wondered what shampoo she used on her long burgundy locks. It smelled amazing and quite familiar although I couldn't quite put my finger on how.

She jumped slightly, but answered quickly. "I just want a coffee to wake me up. I'm not asking for much." It surprised me how instantly she answered me. It made me smile because the poor girl must have been desperate. She didn't even turn around to see who the hell I was. I could have been some creeper and she wouldn't have even noticed it.

"Do you want cream and sugar?" I asked.

"Who drinks coffee without it?" She asked as if it was obvious what she wanted.

"Terrible, terrible people." I answered and she chuckled. I hated my coffee with cream and sugar. Coffee is coffee, I didn't need anything extra. "What size?" I asked.

"Well I want medium, but they don't seem to have that."

"Say you want a grande mild with room." I told her quickly as she approached the counter.

"What?"

"Trust me." I said in a hushed voice.

She nodded her head and when the cashier asked her what she wanted, she said what I told her and once she got the coffee in her hands, she paused. I pointed to the corner of the room, even though she was still not looking towards me.

"There is cream and sugar over there." I said.

She finally turned around and it took a second, but I noticed something that made my jaw drop and according to the look on her familiar face, I could tell she noticed as well.

"Edward?"

"Bella?"

We both said each other's name at the same time as we stared at each other.

I was looking at Bella. Bella fucking Swan. It had been about seventeen years, but I would recognize that face anywhere. She was the coolest girl I had ever known at a certain point in my life. Hell, she was probably the coolest girl—well now woman—that I would ever meet. We were the best of friends when I was in high school back in Seattle. We won the superlative for class best friends, we went to every event together, I went over her house, she went over mine, we went to prom together as friends, and we even took up the top two ranks in our class. Bella was valedictorian and I was salutatorian.

And then it all just went away. I moved back to Boston and she moved to Los Angeles. We drifted apart like most high school friends did. We kept in touch for a little while, but it didn't last long.

But seeing her then made me realize how much time had passed. She looked completely different, yet completely the same. She had the same color hair, only a lot longer. She had the same eyes and face, only a little older looking. She used to be as skinny as a stick, but now she had some meat on her bones. Her um…her breasts were even a little bigger. Why was I even noticing that? This is Bella. I scanned her outfit and saw she was wearing a simple t-shirt, jeans, and a sweatshirt. She seemed completely out of place in the room filled with people waiting to get their coffees to get to work as soon as possible. She looked relaxed in a room filled with so many uptight people. Including me.

"Edward you…you look like a man." She said in disbelief.

I laughed. Hard. It was so like Bella. She was always so blunt and honest and just the best kind of person to be around. She always made me laugh way back in the day—I really needed laughter at that point in my life—and it seemed some things never changed.

"Well I wasn't going to grow into a woman."

She scrunched up her nose. She was fucking cute. Wait, what? This was Bella. Bella fucking Swan. My friend. Bud. I never, ever thought of her like that. We were friends, strictly friends for all those years. People always assumed we were a couple, but I could never look at her like that. Maybe it was because I was so focused on school, I don't know.

"Yeah I guess not. That would have been weird."

"Wow, Bella. It's really good to see you. How have you been?" I asked. I grabbed my coffee from the counter—I went there so often I didn't even have to tell them what I wanted—and paid them. I walked with Bella to the table with the cream, sugar, and everything.

"I've been great. Happy." She didn't look me in the eye when she said that.

Bella never looked me in the eye when she was trying to lie to me about something or keep something from me. She wasn't as happy as she tried to make it sound. How the hell would you know? You haven't seen her in seventeen years.

"Good."

"What about you?" She asked, looking at me straight in the eye with a beautiful smile on her face. This is Bella. You were friends. Friends.

"I've been excellent." She rolled her eyes and I laughed. She always used to make fun of me for my vocabulary. She said I spoke like no one else. I thought she was crazy. "I have no complaints." I actually did. I had no wife or kids when I was thirty-five fucking years old. That was sad.

"You look…executive." She said with a wave at my apparel. "The hair kind of throws it off, but nice look there, Cullen." I ran my hand through my always messy hair at her mention and looked down at myself.

"Thanks. And as a matter of fact, I am the CEO of my own company, so you hit the executive nail right on the head."

"Oh yeah? Well good for you, Edward." She said sincerely, yet not completely affected by what I told her. Usually when I made that fact known to someone, they would ask even more questions and try to act like they were really interested when I knew all they really wanted to do was get close to me and therefore get close to my money. But not Bella. No, she just picked up four packs of sugar and ripped the tops off of all of them at the same time. She poured them all into her cup and stirred it around with a spoon. "I'm happy for you."

Those words right there meant more to me than I think she could have ever known and it gave me a feeling that was so foreign to me. She was happy for me. No one had ever said something like that to me before. Maybe Cooper has said something along those lines, but his happiness for me was kind of expected. Cooper and I were really close. I was happy for anything that made him happy and vice versa. But hearing that from Bella; someone who hadn't seen me in seventeen years, made me realize something.

Feelings could really stand the test of time.

Bella and I were the best of friends. She cared about me and I obviously cared about her. After seventeen years, she was still able to stand there and tell me she was happy that I was happy and successful, and I was able to stand there and notice that she wasn't completely telling me the truth when she said she was happy. I was still able to say that that bothered me. It bothered me that she wasn't completely happy. Some as beautiful as her on the inside and outside deserved nothing but happiness.

Although in the back of my mind, I knew I may have been expecting too much. It had been seventeen years after all. She would have changed right? That may have been true, but I knew without a shadow of a doubt that I wanted to try and figure her out. That's more than what I can say for any woman I have ever met or dated. I thought getting to know her was just a routine part of the whole relationship thing. But with Bella, it was different.

What does all of this mean?

"What are you doing in Boston?" I asked.

"Oh you know; just needed a change I guess."

Another lie. Well maybe not a lie, maybe a half truth. She didn't look me in the eye. I so wanted her too. She was beautiful. Stunning, really, and I found myself maybe a bit too much attracted to her. There goes another foreign feeling; attraction. I never looked at a woman and said I wanted her. I never thought she was so beautiful that I had to kiss her. It shamed me to think it, but Bella looked like someone I would want and someone I would love to kiss. Just look at those lips…

"Alright well I guess I will see you around, Edward."

See me around? We lived in Boston. A rather large city. You didn't just see people around. I didn't want her to leave, but I had no right to keep her. I couldn't help but wonder if she was feeling the same things I was.

"Well would you give me your number? Maybe we could meet up sometime."

She looked up at me finally. Those familiar brown eyes stunned me. Were they always that beautiful? "You really would want to do that?"

"Of course." I said instantly.

A brilliant smile lit up her face and the whole room and my whole world and I felt so proud of myself for bringing that smile to her face. What the hell was happening to me?

She dug into her beat up looking purse and started digging through it. "Just a second. I just need to find a pen…"

I smiled at her. She seemed so scattered and all over the place, yet completely composed and put together. There was something about her that screamed an organized mess. I guess in a way I was like that as well. I looked like an organized and well put together guy, but I was really a mess. I tapped her on her shoulder and she looked up at me quizzically.

"I can just put it in here." I said as I waved my phone in front of me.

"Oh yeah!" She said and pushed down the papers in her purse and closed it up. "I have one of those too!" I threw my head back and laughed. She chuckled as well—never took herself too seriously. That was still there. I couldn't wait to rediscover the old characteristics of Bella and the new ones...if she'll let me of course. She reached into her pocket of her sweater and pulled out a little phone. She flipped it open and started clicking around. "Okay, what's your number?"

I gave her my number and she game me hers. We were making some guy mad at us for loitering around the table with all of the stuff on it, so Bella grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the way with her. I wanted her to grab my arm again and maybe wrap her arms around me. Fuck off.

I wished Cooper could hear my thoughts in that moment. I was acting like a complete girl and I thought it would prove him wrong. I was not that manly if I was having feelings for a woman I just saw not five minutes ago. Yeah I knew her for four years in the past, but that was so long ago. People change over the course of seventeen years. Hell she might have been married and had seven kids or something. I looked at her ring finger. Nothing on it. I started getting excited. Yup. Completely like a woman.

"Well listen, I really need to get going to work, but I will give you a call, alright?" I said.

She was staring at me like I was a confusing piece of art work in a museum. Her eyes scanned my body completely and I felt a little nervous. "You know," She started and my attention was completely on her. "I never would have guessed how handsome you turned out to be." She mused.

"Uhh…"

I didn't know what to say. I had been called good looking, sexy, fine, hot, and even banging—whatever that means—but never handsome. I was stunned into silence as I stared at the beautiful woman before me, looking at me in a way that I had never been looked at before. My stomach did some weird shit and I didn't like it. It felt terrible but amazing at the same time. I felt like we were the only two people in the room and it was the part of the movie where the fireworks would start going off behind them because damn did I feel them.

She hit her head with the palm of her hand. "Oh my God, I really should learn how to just shut up sometimes." She said in despondency.

"No, no…" I said and grabbed her arm when she went to leave. "It's alright, it's…thank you. Uh…" I felt like a babbling idiot. What the hell was wrong with me? I had an education. I was pretty smart, I could sit in a two hour long meeting and have everything to say, but I couldn't find one thing to say to Bella, someone I knew for so long and was so close to? Sometimes things just didn't make sense. "You look beautiful, but then again you always were."

Now where did that come from?

I never thought of Bella in the way I was thinking of her right then. It seemed completely unnatural for me to want to pull her to me and never let go when I just saw her for the first time in many years. It wasn't natural for me to not want to leave that Starbucks or never to stop talking to her. It was unnatural for me to want to take her home with me and cook her dinner or something. It wasn't natural for my body to react the way it did when I looked at her. This was Bella fucking Swan. The girl I considered my good friend all those years, but never, ever had I thought of her as anything more than that. Ever.

Until now apparently and I didn't know how I felt about that. There was too much I didn't know about her and her life and I wasn't the best person for anyone to be with.

How dare Cooper say I was too much of a man. I was experiencing the most girly event that could have ever existed. Maybe he jinxed me.

Love at first sight…or at least intense desire. Desire to see her again at least.

But then again, it really wasn't my first sight of her. I had seen her many times, but this time was different. She felt like the missing piece to my life. No, I was just making things up. I was just hoping that was what she was. Maybe I was just desperate to cling onto anything that would make me feel less like a loser and Bella always made me feel normal. I remember all the good times we had. I was crazy to think that things would go back to the way they were. I didn't even really know her. Seventeen years makes a big difference.

She smiled radiantly. Maybe I could tell myself that I was just intensely hoping that she was the one to make it easier for me, but why did my stomach twist up like that when she smiled at me? This was just so fucking confusing. She took a step closer to me and kissed me lightly on the cheek.

"Give me a call." She said before turning away and heading out of the place without another word.

She left me standing there like an idiot. She kissed me on the cheek. I wanted her to kiss me again. This wasn't natural. I went out to my car and put the coffee in the cup holder. I took my phone out and sent a message out to Cooper.

Fucking shit I think I'm in love. –E

I sent the text and put the phone down in my lap with shaking hands. I must just be getting sick and delusional or something. Stuff like this didn't just happen. I mean maybe I was over exaggerating. I obviously wasn't in love with her. Right? No. I was just…I didn't even fucking know. I just really wanted to see her again, and not because she was beautiful to me and not because she called me handsome or because she gave me a kiss on the cheek. No. I wanted to see her again because she made me feel a comfort when I was in her presence. A comfort that I had when I was in high school and I was around her and a comfort I seemed to have taken for granted.

But now that I had it back, I wanted to cling onto it and never let go. But how could one woman give all of that to me? Was this feeling always there? I shook my head and read the new message I had from Cooper.

Fucking shit that's great, Edward. Don't call her a bitch and look for signs of her being a prostitute. I don't want to have to console you when you find out 'the love of your life' has had more dick than me. –C

Wow. Well he was nice about the whole thing. I could see he was doubting my ability to carry a stable relationship. I was actually starting to doubt myself before I saw Bella. But now…man I was turning into too much of a woman.

Fuck you, Cooper. –E

You wish. –C

Ew. –E

Maybe it would take a while for him to take me seriously about this. Hell, I could barely take myself seriously. This had never happened to me before. I didn't know what to think. All I knew was that I wanted to see Bella again. And again. And well…a lot. I wanted to see her a lot. My phone buzzed again and I looked down, expecting another snarky comeback from Cooper.

That wasn't what I got.

Is this really Edward, or was that all just a really fucked up dream? –B

I smiled down at the text. It made me feel like maybe she had some of the same feelings I did. It did feel surreal to me as well.

It's really me. Don't make me bring up junior year when we went to the party at Tyler's house…-E

I felt giddy and fucking weird. That would get a reaction out of her. Actually, no. I started to panic a little. That would have gotten a reaction out of old Bella. What if I just pissed her off?

If you speak of it, you may just find your nicely tailored suit cut up to pieces and taped to the wall of your bathroom spelling out 'DIE.' Just saying. –B

I laughed out loud. Really laughed. I was sure anyone walking by my car and seeing me laugh like a lunatic would have thought I was well…a lunatic.

Boy did I miss your snarky comments, Bella fucking Swan. –E

Her answer was instantaneous and I felt my heart and stomach do weird things when I saw her response.

I missed you a lot, Edward. More than you probably will ever know. -B

Well here is my new adventure. I am really excited for this story, and I hope that you all will grow to like it. This story, much like all my others, is about something close to my heart that will be revealed later in the story. I will say right now that some of it will be dark, and some of it will be really sad, but if you have read my stuff before, you know I try to balance all that out.

Thanks to Alexa of course for helping me out with this story and being so supportive!

And thanks to you who are going to try and give it a chance, you are really great, and I hope to see you next chapter and all the rest of the chapters.

Review and let me know what you think!