AUTHOR NOTES- Inspiration is a weird thing isn't it? It hits you like a wave and all you can do is hold on tight of the ride.

The inspiration for this story hit me while i was going to a boat show, i didn't think I'd need my computer so i left it at home, only to have my MP3 play a song that i had forgotten... one from long ago. This story hit me like a ton of bricks, i begged my sister and mom to find some lined paper... a note book anything.

All i got was a small yellow note pad... but i made it work. the pictures in my head came to life on that small sheet of paper... although i pondered who the male lead would be ... i was easily torn between Sasuke or Kiba, but Kiba had more of a past with Hinata, also was (through the series) playing a more active role in her life... so me being the lazy writer i am, with having inspiration shoved down my throat, settled with Kiba (less describing of the past)

Anyways this is my monster child.. one coming from a packed van of small children, my mother and my sister...

I hope it makes sense...

"Kiba-kun" Your voice cracked as you stood there; your hands clutching that familiar brown suitcase, your grip so tight it as if it was you were holding on for your dear life. "Can I stay with you tonight?" tears escaped your eyes as you spoke, falling down your rosy cheeks.

It wasn't night anymore, it was three in the morning. There could only be one reason why you were here.

That Jackass did something again, didn't he.

You were too forgiving with that bastard. Every time he flirted with other girls you easily forgave him, and blamed yourself for not being "pretty enough" for him. You thought he was in the right. You are selfish like that. Even when your father abused you, you always claimed it was always your fault.

Yeah, Hinata I knew about the abuse. The way he hit you. The venomous words he fed you. How he claimed you were never going to be good enough for him. That you were not worth keeping alive. You always told me that same excuse whenever I asked about it, that he was only hurt that your mother died while giving birth to you. That it was your fault you were "slow". This was typical of you. You never blamed anyone else for problems in your life, just accepted the sins of everyone else as your own, silently carrying everyone's burdens in your chest… when late at night you would cry yourself to sleep.

You would be surprised by how much I knew about you.

That is what I prided myself in, absorbing everything I possibly can about you. I was your best friend after all, we have been around each other since were little. You are the only person I have let in close enough to see the real me, and I… I just learned everything I could about you. For example, the differences between your blushes (Dark red=mad, like pink= embarrassed ex.) The way you twirled your fingers in conversations; if it was clockwise that meant you were pestered and holding back anger, unlike when they were twiddled counterclockwise, that meant you were happy, joy filled. I notice everything about you Hinata, I know you. I know you, to the point that it is unhealthy.

So I knew why you were here-

At my Door-

At three in the morning-

And I knew what was going to happen.

The first time this happened, you had been dating that boy for about a year. I never understood what you saw in that love-sick guy… but he was your choice… so I had to accept him… for you. You came to my house that night, it was raining outside. You were drenched. I was a miracle that I ran into you. You hadn't even rung my doorbell, you were just standing outside my apartment door, like you were in a trance. I, on the other hand, was on my way out to a keg party down at Choji's house but seeing you outside my door made me throw all my plans in the trash.

Your eyes were vacant as tears kept falling down your cheeks. You looked up at me. Your expression seemed so filled with pain and sorrow. All I wanted to do was hold you in my arms, shielding you from all the cruelty that this world had done to you.

I invited you into my apartment. You followed silently, like a broken china doll… you weren't you. You seemed like a shell, hollow. You had built a wall, trying to hide the emotions in your heart as you spoke to me, try to tell me what had happened.

You had caught him in bed with Sakura after returning home from work. He had slept with her while you were hustling to pay for the apartment you shared. He had told you before that they were just childhood friends like we were, that they shared no chemistry like you and he shared. You didn't let him say a thing and just walked out of that room, filling your suitcase with everything you could. That he yelled in protest, but you didn't say a word… you didn't look at him as you left through your front door.

You told me you wanted out. That you didn't want this painful relationship, you were sick and tired of feeling insecure. That you shouldn't have to deal with his constant childish behaviors. That you shouldn't have to keep forgiving him. That you were sick of yourself for being so blind. That you hated the person you were. That your father was right, that it was your fault. You were the one who refused to sleep with him until you were married. That no boy could love a girl like you

I couldn't believe the venomous words that escaped your mouth… That you hated yourself. That you were hideous. That you were worthless….. You father was a complete idiot to make you believe things like that. I could easily name someone who was so insanely in love with you that he would kill just to have a girl like you in his life.

Me. I am in love with you. I loved you since we were little kids spending our nights looking up at the stars. Why did you think I was so obsessed with you? Why did you think my only relationships were one night stands? All I ever wanted was you. All I ever wanted was that lustful blush to be directed at me…

Why should you hate yourself? I loved everything about you. You were kind, patient and accepting of everyone. You were open, warm and loving, even to people who didn't deserve it. Who ever said you were ugly? Girls killed to have a body like yours. You had your curves in all the right places. Your long hair glimmered as if diamonds were embedded in the fine strands. Women paid millions to look like you did. Who ever said you were worthless knew jack-shit…

Because you are my everything.

But as you sat there that night, breaking down slowly… I knew I couldn't say a thing. All I could do was offer soft words of hidden protest, not sharing with you these hidden feelings swelling deep in my heart. I held you tightly that night as you cried, until you feel asleep peacefully in my arms.

The next morning you woke up, with a smile on your face and pancakes on the table. You said you could get over this. You could get over your first love. That you were alright.

I got angry. I knew what was going on. You were hiding your emotions again, for the benefits of others. You didn't want me to feel uncomfortable.

'You're not alright' I remember retorting 'Would you just stop faking it, I'm not one who deserves your pity Hinata.'

You started crying again, smiling softly as your tears fell swiftly down your cheeks. I jumped up, holding you in my arms once more, 'It takes time… but I am here for you' my body easily wrapped around your tiny frame, it was like our bodied were made for each other

You thanked me in-between sobs, that you were happy to have a friend like me in your life, I have always been happy to have you. We talked, wrapped in each other's warmth, reliving the good old days. The adventures we shared and events in our lives we wished never to repeat. Your crying had come to a halt as you reminisced; a smile crept across your stained cheeks. I honestly believe you should always be smiling. It was such a glorious sight to behold. I knew I would have the happiest life if I could spend the rest of my existence having you in my arms as we spoke softly of our past and our hopeful future.

I don't know what took over me, but it finally happened. I knew I wanted to tell you. I wanted to confess my love to you. I wanted to have you like this forever. I wanted you. 'Hinata, there is something I have to tell yo-' but before I could utter those final words the doorbell rang.

I had to leave you on that , leaving your frail body to fend for itself as I made my way to the door. You had a small smile on your face, and in your eyes, a glint… of something. I couldn't comprehend what it was, but as you looked at me I felt warm. I felt my chest swell up with love, but I didn't have a clue what the look you were giving me signified.

I answered the door, thinking it was Shino or something… not expecting to see Naruto. Rage boiled through my veins. Before your ex could utter a word I slugged him, knocking his skinny ass on the floor. I started yelling at him, calling him every cussword in the book. Every time he would try to get back up I would punch him to the ground again and continue the swearing tangent I was on.

Until you appeared behind me. You were shocked by his presence. He told you that you both needed to talk and I told him that I'd kick his ass again if he didn't leave. You put your hand on my shoulder, telling me that it was okay, that you wanted to talk with him.

I left you both in the hallway, but not before threatening to rip out his vocal chords if he tried anything. You came back in shortly after, telling me you've forgiven him. That he claimed to be drunk when it happened, that they both were wasted, and that she started it, that he promised to never go near her again, that he said his life was incomplete without you.

I didn't believe those lies for a second. That what he was telling you was pure bull-shit. But I didn't say a thing, just nodded softly as you picked up your brown suitcase. It was not my place to tell you how to live your life….

But then I noticed a glint of pain was in your pale eyes.

As you started leave, I felt this urgency, as if this was my last chance….that it was now or never.

'I love you Hinata' I called out.

You turned, smiling sweetly as you edged closer to me.

'I love you too, Kiba' you responded, kissing me on the cheek. Then… you left my apartment, going back into his arms.

I wasn't surprised by your reaction. We had shared those words before but… you never realized the true meaning behind then, that it was my confession of love to you.

There were countless times after that night that you would leave him… because he would cheat again. You would come to me each time… crying your heart and soul out. Then, he would come the next morning and apologize, making false promises and claims of undying love… and you would go back to him.

You always did.

Now you were engaged… and were going to be wed next march. I saw the diamond ring twinkle in the crappy lighting of the hall.

Did I really want to do this again?

You break my heart into millions of pieces every time you leave, going back to him.

And I knew this time was no different

That you would always go back to him.

I knew you would accept his false promises once more

That you would run back to his adulterous arms.

You believed you didn't deserve better.

Why do you torture yourself like this?

When will you think you've had enough?

Does he make you want to fall in love?

Are you afraid to be alone?

Is that why you stay with him?

I don't understand this Hinata…

This is the one thing I don't think I will ever understand….

It hurts me every time I see this pain on your face… I hate him for it. Each time it happens I wonder if I can let you enter my apartment once more. Can I manage this heart break? Should I just ignore you and move on… Should I fall for another? Knowing this, know you.. Should I just cut my ties and let you work it out on your own... leaving this town this country so I would never have witness and feel this pain again. Could I really do this to the girl whom I've loved since childhood? Could I even live a life without you?

"Sure" I sighed taking you in my arms.

I love you Hinata… to the point of insanity. I know, without you, my life is nothing… So I stay here for you. I will be that once place you will run too to escape the cruelty of the world….

I will be here…

Until you leave me once more.

PLEASE RATE AND REVIEW~