Chapter Twenty: Sanity…?

I wanna give a special thanks to a good friend Brady who doesn't have computer access all the time but has printed this story when he gets the chance so he can read it at home! I'm just glad that people read this ^^ I love y'all and really hope you enjoy!

The towns in this chapter are completely made up and of no real significance. I own nothing of Final Fantasy 7 just my own OCs

Shiroi gasped, finally filling her lungs with air as she slowly uncurled from her fetal position. She looked up with teary eyes to Yochi and another of the Ancient Elders and choked on more tears, just barely able to swallow them and sit still.

Yochi wrapped his arms around her and she shuddered at his warm touch. "Shiroi, what is the matter?"

She shook her head and wiped away a stray tear from her dark violet eyes and pushed her platinum hair from her damp face. "What we feared has happened, Yochi, she is….she has….it's happening again!" she crumpled against his chest. "It's my fault! It's…because of my…blood.."

Yochi slowly rocked her in his lap, one hand rubbing her back in a soothing motion and the other stroking her hair. "No, it's not your fault, please calm down and tell me what happened?"

Shiroi struggled to collect herself and tried to remember what they had been doing before she had felt the icy pain assault her body, the connection between her and her daughter sending her a signal, the same signal that had been given so many years ago. Fear was dominant in her mind, fogging her common sense and telling her to run to Kituna and swoop her away to a safer place where she could be safe from herself. It was so strong she had to fight herself from pushing Yochi away from her and leaping up and doing what her body wanted her to do as fast as was possible. She looked up fearfully at Yochi and found his presence and concerned face calming as it had always been to her. He was the one who had saved her from Jenova's madness, convinced her that she didn't need to consume a planet's energy and take away life to make herself stronger, that a family, that love, did the same and made you the strongest being in the world. She took a deep breath and focused on what was happening or had happened in this case to their daughter.

"She has become unbalanced again, I felt a rush of cold energy like before, the same feel of my power but much stronger than my own or hers at the time of the last incident. She released much of it, slowly gaining control of it…she took five lives in such a short time…" she wrapped her arms around her, the imprint of the icy power awakening her own killing instincts and dark urges she had buried for so long. "It's affecting me my love, I feel the urges to kill arising…"

Yochi looked up at the Elder behind him and nodded his head stiffly. Things were definitely not going according to plan with his daughter and he was afraid if history repeated itself she would end up in another mako pit to crystalize once more, but this time she would be placed where no man or beast could find her. It pained him to think of that as a solution but knew that the past bloodshed couldn't be repeated at any cost and then there was the mission she had bestowed on herself of altering the past for a better future. Someone else would have to fill her shoes, but was anyone strong enough and able minded? He looked down at his wife and sighed as her old self and her true self battled beneath her skin. Right now he had to make sure she didn't break loose either while the Elders dealt with Kituna, that and pray for the best.

"Darling, remember that she isn't alone anymore though. Sno found her during last time and is with her now. She will help her…"

Shiroi barely managed a nod and clutched his tunics front with white knuckles. Yochi smiled weakly and hugged her tighter. "It will be different this time, it has to be. As long as Jenova remains dormant Kit will be alright this time."

080

Genesis stretched his arms high above his head, his now trademark red leather coat and gloves laid out on the table of the room he'd been given in the small town of Baol along the coast of Wutai. He had just been sent out for special recon with his new troops as his first line of missions as a SOLDIER First Class and he was bored out of his wits. His eyes scanned the small room he had all to himself, his men sharing other rooms in the same hotel as well as other hotels in the city and its neighbor, Ramm.

He was finding that besides the fact of having a lot more men under his command, he had no real difference in his duties from his previous ranks besides making the decisions that kept them all alive or killed them and the fact that he could pass up a mission assigned to him, which he wouldn't do unless he had to. But this wasn't a mission that was under him exactly, all he had to do was follow the commands Lazard had given him and they were pretty clear of getting information on Wutai, not talking about it just writing it down, without being seen and then returning after two weeks with the documents and whatever else solid they could get their hands on without giving themselves away. To him it was a boring mission indeed.

He fell to the floor on his hands and toes and began to rigorously do sets of push-ups, reveling in the burn of his muscles being put to work, craving to be out fighting instead of quietly sneaking through shadows with open ears. He continued to pump up and down, hypnotizing himself with the rising and descending of his torso and the sight of the floorboards drawing closer to his steady eyes. He didn't notice when the temperature in the room dropped until he was feeling the beads of sweat chilling his face. He paused and held himself above the floor for a moment, his eyes scanning the room for the sudden drop in temperature but finding nothing, questioning what he expected to find in the first place. He pushed against the floorboards and pulled back, bending his knees so that he was in a crouching position before standing and rolling his arms. He stretched the lactic acid free of his muscles while he strolled around the small room he had taken for himself, giving the larger rooms for his men who would be sharing and needing the space. He searched this time for cracks in the floors, walls and along the ceiling, then he moved on to search for any signs of an icy spell being used by someone or some monster trying to get into his room and take him out in the name of Wutai. He still found nothing. He reached for his leather gloves, pulled them on, then slipped into his long leather coat as the temperature continued to drop. He reached for his strongest fire spell and tapped it to activate the small orb so that it bathed the small space in a warm glow and radiated warmth. He rubbed his hands together around the orb and began to roll it along his chest, arms and legs in an attempt to negate the freezing temperatures. He shifted his weight from foot to foot, bouncing in place to keep his sluggish blood flowing, wondering why his body felt like he was standing outside the Icicle Inn during a blizzard. He made his way over to the small square window and looked out at the warm afternoon scene, women walking around in swimsuits to and from the nearby beach that the small town was built around and men running around in shorts and some with no shirts on, their bare chests glistening with sweat from just walking down the streets. So how could he be this cold when they weren't! He was feeling the heat not three hours ago at best, walking around in his sleeveless black shirt like it was the middle of June with his men!

Genesis shivered for what felt like the millionth time and rubbed his arms through his coat's sleeves. It just didn't make any sense and he feared he was either going crazy or suffering severe symptoms from his last mako injection which was ludicrous. But what other answer was there?

My son….

Genesis turned towards the door, half expecting to see his mother smiling back at him with something she for some reason decided to bring to him in Wutai then mentally slapped himself in the forehead. What would she be doing here? Absolutely nothing is what she'd be doing here. He growled at his own foolishness and stomped over to the door, throwing it open and going out into the hall. He locked the door behind him and frowned when he shivered again, his teeth chattering violently in his skull. What was wrong with him? He rubbed his arms aggressively against his coats sleeves and quickly marched down the hall and down the creaky steps to the lobby. He stopped when the cold was still with him but a tourist couple walked past him in shorts and sleeveless shirts. Something was definitely wrong and it wasn't the air circulation like he had hoped.

He snarled his frustration at himself and forced his arms to relax at his sides and his feet to walk out into the harsh sunlight. He laughed dryly when he wasn't surprised that the temperature he was feeling didn't change. He calmly accepted that he was either dying, dead, or insane and walked down the crowded street to a bar with loud laughter and music flowing out into the street. Maybe some liquor would warm him up at least on the inside and if not then he'd just drink until he didn't care anymore.

Genesis chose a lone seat by the far wall in the shadows and motioned for the bartender for a shot glass. The ample brunette sashayed over and flipped her long straight hair and flashed a perfect white smile his way as she set down a glass by his gloved hands.

"What'll it be tonight handsome?" she asked in a silky voice.

Genesis ignored her flirtatious attitude and rolled the glass between his fingers on the polished bar countertop. "Your strongest Scotch."

She nodded. "Alright, been a hard day?"

Genesis chuckled softly. "You could say that, or a hard week or two."

She pulled out the Scotch and filled his glass with the amber liquid with a knowing nod. "Shit happens to the best of us, ya know? Need to vent?"

Genesis swallowed the Scotch in one swift gulp and didn't even flinch as the liquid burned its way down his throat, it didn't do much against the cold. He looked up at her and flinched at the girl's dark eyes, they were such a dark blue that they looked violet. He looked down instead at his now full glass as she filled it again and tossed that one back as well, wishing it was stronger.

"Not really… I don't really know what I'd say to you." he mumbled as she filled him up again.

She shrugged. "Anything you need to hun, that's part of my job description, hmhm." She giggled gently and leaned on her elbows in front of him, silently coaxing him to unburden his troubles to her.

Genesis remained silent as he tilted back his glass and grimaced at the cold burn he felt, he felt like he was growing colder instead of warmer. He shook his head and cradled his forehead in his gloved hands. "You wouldn't understand…"

"Girl trouble?" she guessed with a tentative smile, tilting her head to look past his interwoven fingers to see his azure eyes.

He sighed. "Part of it."

"Well, let's see… That could be one of a few things. She could be crazy for you but you sick of her, she could be sick of you but you crazy for her, or you could both feel attracted yet disgusted in each other. Then again there's always the possibility that she or you are already engaged with a person and still feel the attraction… hmm…do any of those hit the mark?" she giggled, trying to lighten the mood.

Genesis shivered and rubbed his arms. "I'd rather not talk about it, okay."

The bar maid nodded solemnly and emptied the bottle into his glass. She raised her eyebrows in surprise, not realizing she had poured him a whole bottle and he was still on his feet and coherent. "Uh, are you alright?" she asked with a slight hint of worry in her voice that the SOLIDER First Class didn't appreciate.

His head snapped up and he glared at her. "I just want to be left alone with a drink, now will you do your job and fill me up again or do I have to go to another bar?"

The brunette peered into his clear blue eyes, momentarily captivated by their stark beauty, like the blue ice of glaciers in the Northern Continent. Then she started, his eyes were still clear, he wasn't even buzzed! "You… drank a whole bottle of our strongest Scotch… Are you sure you're okay?"

Genesis instantly realized the cause of her concern and grew concerned himself. He had never been a light weight when it came to drinking but he had been drunk or at least buzzed before finishing any bottle of liquor. He looked down at his hands with wide eyes laced with fear, further worrying the bar maid. He shook his head then nodded it.

"I… I'm fine… I guess I didn't realize how much I had been drinking. I'll just be going now then…" he fished out a handful of gil from his wallet, not even counting it or waiting for change as he pushed himself away from the bar and staggered through the crowd filling in to get out into the stuffy streets. He staggered around, failing to make sense of what was happening and fearing the worst as he made his way to the soft sands of the beach.

He slumped down in a secluded space behind a pile of rocks and stared out at the rising and falling white frothy crests far off on the horizon.

"What's happening to me?" he whispered, it had only been yesterday he was normal, everything had been going great. His career was finally taking off and he was getting everything he had ever wanted from his life in ShinRa. What did he do wrong? Did he deserve this? Was it the end?

No.

Genesis paused in his thoughts at the familiar voice, the one that had called him 'son' back in his hotel room. He sat up straighter and looked around for the woman the voice belonged but saw no one.

Heheh, oh child, you can't see me yet but we will meet. I promise.

He felt the chill inside him almost flex, the feeling like icy shards moving throughout his muscles and bones. He raised a hand to clutch at his skull and winced.

My dear, you are a strange one, I am not so strong in you as I had hoped to be… Pity, but you will do.

"I'll do for what? What are you talking about!" Genesis yelled from his now kneeling position.

The cells aren't strong in you but you possess some of my power, that much is proven with my ability to talk with you at such a great distance. Now, on to more important matters, I know your desires Genesis, all of them. You are troubled by my other children, are you not? You long for something that is far beyond your reach though right in front of you. You are not alone my son, I will help you get what you need. I need it too, the Gift of the Goddess, we can have it together.

Genesis looked up, forgetting there was no one there to look at. "What do you know of the Gift of the Goddess? The last act is missing of Loveless so no one but the writer knows what it is so how can you give it to me?"

The voice laughed. Gen, you are a funny one, I am pleased. The Gift is anything open to interpretation, the author probably never even wrote the last act, leaving it open for the viewer or reader to place what their gift would be and what it stood for. What do you desire Genesis? What is it you truly desire? Tell me, I am your Mother.

"You aren't my mother…" he mumbled.

Hm, just tell me, dear. What do you want most on the Planet?

Genesis thought for a moment and studied the golden sand under his hand through his long fingers. What did he want? What was he doing? He was talking to himself, placing his mother in the role of guidance as she had always been for him to sort out himself. He smiled at this realization, he wasn't crazy! There was no other voice in his head but what his subconscious interpreted as his mother back in Banora. He sighed with intense relief, feeling his body loosen up immediately from the loss of the stress such down spiraling thoughts had chiseled into his mind and body. That was when his eyes were opened to what he wanted.

"The Goddess herself…" he whispered with a small grin of joy and longing.

The Goddess? Whom would this be my son?

He chuckled lightly, his body finally warming up at her memory of the golden Goddess he so desired. "Kituna."

Ah, her. Yes, I need her help too my son and you are the one I wish to get help in getting her help. She is close to my eldest son and getting closer especially now. You have to return to her as soon as possible.

"But I'm on a mission, I can't return now, not until we get our information." Genesis protested.

There is no time to lose but you are right, you are hindered by ShinRa. You wouldn't be though with my help. What do you say my son? If you help me, I will help you.

"What help is it you have in mind for me?" Genesis asked cautiously, unsure of his mental state once again. What could his mental illusion of his mother offer him to get him out of his recon duties?

I will awaken your body, enhance your abilities to make you like your idol, make you strong! ShinRa will see you're potential and worth and put you to better use after you return.

Genesis rose at the prospect of such power but paused. "But how will I return? ShinRa won't just send a chopper out here to get me because I say I want to return early to show them I'm stronger?" he frowned when he realized he was just talking to himself and sighed, turning to return to his hotel and his small room where he could rest. He obviously needed it.

My son, the voice continued as he walked along the stretch of the beach and headed toward the busy streets, I will give you a gift of transportation that comes with the power I have told you about.

Genesis smirked as he asked in his head, "And what would that be?"

Flight. Do you accept?

He laughed and shrugged at his mental fascinations. It made sense, he was engrossed in a play that told of wings and redemption and love, why wouldn't his mind put him in a state of getting all he wanted?

"Sure." He said aloud as he pushed past tourists exiting his hotel.

The voice laughed happily. That's my boy, we will have everything now!

"We sure will." He comically agreed while cracking a smile, returning to the confines of his room and kicking off his boots to lay down on the creaking bed. He wished he could get all he wanted, but the truth was Kituna was all wrapped up in another rich privileged young man with much more money and power than he had. He wanted her badly and would do anything to have her, but was also willing to accept that he would be a bachelor for life with his growing fangirl clubs, always having to imagine the girl in the dark was his angel, his Goddess.

He closed his eyes with a content smile, once again imagining what her body and lips felt and tasted like as he did every night since the night they saw Loveless. He brought up her pristine image instantly and walked up to her, wrapping his arms around her slight waist and leaning down with an eager smile as she returned his touch and smile. She let out a satisfied laugh as he kissed along her neck and down her shoulder.

"Gen, you are all I need, we will have everything forever and always." She said softly as her violet eyes flashed and his senses returned to his nervous system.

He felt the lingering effects of the Scotch he had downed back in the bar, the buzz he had bypassed fading in his pre-sleep euphoria, and the soft touch of his dream version of his love. He was overwhelmed with her and his longing for her that he didn't even notice the small pain that ran along his spine as he was lost in his sleep and his dreams.

080

Kituna sobbed as her other half leaned over her and gave her a small supportive smile. All she felt was ice and pain, an icy burn that was foreign and oppressing while also comforting and familiar, a part of her while not. It was her other half, in control of her body, killing…. What had she allowed Hojo to do? Why did she allow him to do it? She had made a grave mistake, worse than getting close to the three SOLDIER First Class, worse than getting close to Rufus… She could have just signed the Planet's death warrant early! She was a failure to her parents, to her Cetra brethren and to the Planet.

She didn't deserve to live.

This icy side of her… she could feel her joy in bloodshed, in killing, in being the killer… she could very well take Sephiroth's place as the avenging angel that seeks the Planet's destruction.

What had she unleashed on the world?

The green-eyed version of herself sighed at Kituna's crazed expression, her violet eyes wide, almost bugging out of their sockets, her mouth twisted in a grimace of terror and self-loathing, her body curled in the protective fetal position with her hands clenching her silky platinum hair. She knew what she was feeling without reading the expression, she was a part of her after all. She cleared her throat and edged closer.

"Um, you know, she doesn't have to take over. You just have to remember you're in charge." She said in her soft voice.

Kituna's eyes shot over to her, causing the Cetra to push back in momentary fear. Kituna's gaze wavered, her violet depths darkening in her own fear and desperation.

"She's so much stronger than me… she will only overpower me again…and again…and again…and.." she prattled on until her other half cut her off with a surprisingly forceful interjection.

"No! She is part of you, she is you! You have her strength and you control it. True you had an overdose on cells similar to your mother's but that is only half of who you are. I am your other half and now that the overdose has worn down some you can regain control."

Kituna slowly uncurled herself and looked up hopefully at the golden haired green-eyed version of herself. "I can?"

She nodded with a confident smile. "I will help you."

Kituna nodded and sat up, running her hands through her hair to tame the knots her fit of hysteria and pain had caused. "Okay… how do I do it?"

The Cetra sat beside her and frowned slightly. "You just have to calm down and concentrate I guess."

Kituna looked doubtful but nodded, accepting her father's side's hand in hers as she closed her eyes and took a series of calming breaths to slow her racing heart. She focused on the soft touch of her Cetra half and on herself, she heard every soft breath and felt every pulse through their veins until she was steady in her mind. She nodded once and opened her eyes.

"I am in control." She said softly, barely over a whisper.

She narrowed her eyes and repeated herself, louder this time.

"I am in control."

Her face hardened in determination as she growled. This wasn't working.

There was a soft padding sound behind her and Kituna turned to see a large white ferno with garnet red eyes.

"Sno…what are you doing here?" Kituna asked happily.

Sno sat beside her and touched her wet nose to Kituna's cheek, causing the young woman to giggle from the cute and comforting gesture.

I am here for you, young one.

"Sno?" the ferno nodded.

You need to get back in control, the threat to you and the demi-Cetra is gone now.

Kituna nodded and closed her eyes, straining to focus on regaining control as Sno touched her nose to her brow. She felt a rush of burning heat that was surprisingly calming. Sno's presence itself was calming to her, pure and telling her everything was alright, like the first snow fall of the year that brought vital nutrients to the ground for the next harvest. She felt a gentle breeze blow around her form, blowing her hair around slightly.

080

Rufus re-holstered his gun and ran a hand through his blond hair, not knowing what to do about this. The church, once clean and pure, was now practically painted in blood and bodies. His eyes went back to the shadows where the man who was going to rape Aerith apparently hid, his unseeing eyes staring back at them and a deep hole carved into his chest, his unmoving heart lying somewhere by him. He had to do something about this though, the scent of blood would undoubtedly attract animals or monsters from the rubbage littering the Slums.

"Kit…" he started, he needed to speak reason to her about what she had done. It was obvious she wasn't herself but this new her was a ruthless killer and a danger to all, including herself. He was stopped however when her eyes widened in shock, one of her slender hands slowly going to her stomach, confusion knotting her brows. "Kit, what's happening? What's wrong now?"

She looked up at him, almost pleadingly. "I… something's wrong… I feel… sick." She fell to her knees and gasped for air, Rufus quickly jogging over to place his hand on her sweating brow.

"Kit? Kit, just breathe okay, just breathe." He said, motioning Aerith to retrieve his bag of goods he had laid down beside her. "I have some water and cloth, you can drink some then lay back down. You have a terrible fever." He removed his hand, blowing on it to cool his own heated skin.

Aerith brought him the back, handing it to him with a shaky hand before returning to her pew and sitting as far away as possible. Rufus sighed, she was in shock and probably needed some medical attention if the man had indeed been well into the way of raping her.

"Aerith, will you be okay? We can go to the ShinRa building for medical attention if you want to." He offered as he opened the water bottle. He poured a little on the cloth and twisted the fabric together to get it all damp and then held out the bottle to Kituna's lips. She took a few sips before her eyes screwed shut in silent pain. Rufus placed the cloth under her bangs on her brow and helped her up to the nearest pew and gently laid her down. That was when he saw it, her hair, it was changing color, the roots taking a darker hue and bleeding into dark gold. He watched until her muscles eased on their tension and her hair was entirely golden and stood up to give her space as she opened her dusk hued eyes and sat up, a smile on her pale pink lips. She turned to him and he saw tears glistening in her eyes.

"I'm back in control…" she breathed. She jumped up and threw herself at the startled President of ShinRa. "I'm back in control!"

Rufus looked with wide eyes at an equally startled Aerith and then back to the clinging hybrid with her arms wrapped tightly around his torso.

"Back… in control?" he asked slowly, not quite understanding.

She looked up at him and nodded. "It was scary, but I regained control and I promise it won't happen again! That half of me, the half I got from my mother… she's dark and dangerous and I don't know why I let her take control except that Aerith was in danger and I couldn't waste time resisting her. She was so much stronger than me…" she buried her face in his shoulder and sniffed. "I just want to go back to the building, okay?"

Rufus nodded. "Of course, we can go home. I'll send Tseng out here with Reno and Rude to clean up before the smell attracts monsters." He looked over at Aerith. "We'll stay here until Tseng gets here Aerith then he'll walk you home if you don't want to come with us…"

Aerith shook her head, her long braid bouncing against her back. "I'll go home with Tseng." She said quietly.

Rufus nodded in understanding and walked Kituna over to the pew and sat down with her. She leaned heavily on him, laying her head against his chest, her hands still clinging to his white coat like he was her lifeline. He didn't fully understand still what was going on or what had happened but Hojo would have to reveal more of what he knew about the young hybrid beside him. The fate of the world depended on it.

Otherwise he feared they'd all lose their sanity.

Okay, that's the next chapter, I suck at connection chapters if you haven't noticed ^^; but I'm happy with it. Please tell me what you think and thanks for reading!