Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter story but I am willing to eat a chocolate less pink cupcake that's not chocolate for it. Now that's a serious sacrifice.

"I'm scared," I state.

"Why?" Mrs. Plum inquires with the gooey surgarness of something that's way to sweet and like is bad for your teeth.

"That pink will dominate the world." I reply with the sweetness of mud burying cupcakes and turning into proper chocolate.

Mrs. Plummy Pants frowns before smiling again, "What's bad about pink?" Mrs. Plummy Pants asks with a disgustingly sweet smile. Eurgh, she's wearing a way too red lipstick.

She's ugly… What are you doing here?

Cynthia… you're my bloody mind… why the heck do you not know?

Minds deserve a break too, okay?

Yah... whatever… cause McGonagall thinks I need mental help… Darn!

She's supposed to be your therapist?

Pretty much… yah…

Wow, I never thought I'd say this but she's more mental then you!

Thanks

About that Plum lady, she should go Goth.

That's a great idea.

Of course it is, It's my idea.

Hmph… my ideas are good too.

Yeah, right.

Growl…

"Darling, sweetie are you okay?" Mrs. Plummy Pants questions with a fake concern bubble of sweet evilness.

"No, I just realized that I have a scroll of potions to finish and I can't seem to find my glittery pink ink or my cupcake scented quill!" I exclaim with pure horror that was so fake only pink sweatered glittery ladies that smell like polar bear cupcakes of evilness that are inferior to penguins wouldn't notice.

"Oh poor dearie," Mrs. Plummy Pants cooes, "You're not crazy! Just misunderstood! I'll tell your rude teacher how sweet you really are!" She bounces up and skips away.

That actually worked…

Yupeedoodle

Your troubles aren't over yet

WHAT! THAT AIN'T TRUE! I'M FREE

Look behind you.

Why?

Just do it, alright?

I whirled around. I was met with darkness. Oh, and a weird old castle smell. Plus, I saw a bunch of spiders wiggling around. Eurgh. Ooooh, and three angry but good looking boys running toward me. Well, I'm flattered. Woah, they look a bit like the Marauders, don't they Cynthia?

Run!

Huh?

There are three extremely muscular and pretty darn angry guys running at you with their wands out that you offended last week,

Oh.

I scream as loud as I could, which is by the way loud enough to break the glitteriest monkey's left eardrum. Then I start running. So then I continue running. My feet hurt. I should so work out more often. I mean I could finally use those look-good-while-working-out, outfit Aunt Lithia send me. Oh look they are catching up to me. I suppose it is time to use my running-from-mad-monkeys-and-avoiding-rotten-bananas technique of running.

Sirius's POV

I widen my eyes. That girl was crazy. She was spinning around, waving her arms, and still running meanwhile shrieking something like, "Pot the hippos." That thing was a dangerous hazard to the school.

"Are you sure she was sane enough to pretend to be Bellatrix realistically?" I gasped for breath.

"Yes," Remus replied.

Oh that sounded weird. It was total alliteration. Remus replied. No, that wasn't good enough. Wait, I got it! Remus replied rambunctiously! Oh that was hilarious!

"Okay I've got it!" James suddenly yelled, "Remus, you enter the left hallway. Sirius, you follow her and I'm taking the right corridor. We'll corner her."

We both nod. Remus and James leave, and I run. Watching my feet move fast is fun. It's like this bur of feet. It reminds me of polar bears. I like polar bears. Doom to those awful penguins if you ask me!

We were cornering her. She had no way to run. The girl was trapped at the end of the hallway. We stopped gasping for our breath that had ran away during the chase. She would be king of pretty if it wasn't for the mad look in her eyes and the Bellatrix thing.

Her thin creamy fingers ran through her hair. Her bright blue eyes darted around filled with concern. I might snog her if she didn't resemble a penguin. Oh and she did. Well a pretty crazy penguin.

"We've gotcha!" James declared finally managing to catch his runaway breath. The girl looked at him and replied,

"Err… No, you don't."

James looked quite miffed at that. He ruffled up his feathers, like a peacock. Oh I was so sure that he would be one when we're… you know. I would be a polar bear of course. Peter would be a mouse or something rodent like.

"Yes, I do!" James argued.

The girl looked at each of us with a sly grin on her pretty penguin face.

"Are you sure?" She inquired.

Oh James don't say yes! I know she has something up her beak. That penguin ook gives me the shivers. I know that the best course of action when meeting penguins are too slowly back away and then run away screaming.\

"Yes!" James answered. Oh no.

"Well…" She grinned, "I have somehow found your lucky snitch and I'm hiding it. I found Remus's stash of chocolate and I'm keeping it. Oh, and Sirius's hair comb and I'm burning it!"

!

Sandra's POV

I grin in a very evil way that actually made some polar bear stomp in a fearful way look un-scary. In all truth, I did fina a snitch but not his, I found a diary but not Remus's, but I did fing a hair comb that belonged to Sirius. Hey, I had to lie. I deserved the lie-and-don't-get-scolded!

It isn't fair. Not fair at all to poor me. My turn to run so goodbye my fellow Gryffindors. So I run very fasty in a speedy way in order to avoid a very meany pantsy jerk face. Merlin curse long legs. Why does Nutty Vase have long legs. SSuch a fast runner person too. Argh. Merlin curse my luck. Or more of my lack of it.

Yeah that pretty much summarizes it.

Then the most amazing thing ever happened. The polar bear looking Sir Eat-a-lot fell on his muscular knees and started bowing to yours truly. I mean I was so honored. Then the weirdest thing happened.

"Oh give it back!" He pleaded. Well not that weird part.

"I'll even marry you!" Sirius begged, "Anything!"

Look he proposed to you.

Cynthia. I think he's crazy.

I know he's crazy.

Are you a brainbot?

Excuse me!

You know those mental things that take over minds?

No.

Er… _ POV

A femine voice broke the silence.

"Are you sure?" She asked hoarsely.

The girl lied limply on the white sheets. Her face was smeared with ashes and her breath riddled with sickness.

"I'm sure," Another voice replied, "How else could we survive?"

The boy who answered the girl held his wand aloft, glaring into the darkness. Another figure stepped out. The girl screamed and the boy stepped back already taking charge.

"Mione, make sure they stay asleep, I'll deal with him." The man yelled.

The girl nodded weakly, terror apparent on her face.

Wait a second! What does that got to do with anything? You'll see…

I am so sorry for not updating! School was out to murder me and I had no spare time! So I finished it today making it extra long! Please forgive me. The last part is only a little part of the story! Don't runaway! It is going to be a humorous story not a dark one! Thank you so much for reviewing!

Sandra: Why do they laugh at my life story?

Lady Tia Malfoy: Who told you that?

Sandra: I didn't look at the reviews at memorize them word by word like you told me not to or anything!

Lady Tia Malfoy: Grrr…

Excuse me while I go chase the penguin girl, thank you!