Thanks to my lovely beta, Fayth in the Music, who beta-ed this chapter… then kind of quit on me, I'm not sure. Anyways, this story has themes of domestic violence, not-consensual incest, and rape. If any of that offends, please do not read. Also, I will occasionally do things that are not strictly grammatically correct- that's to help the story's mood and have it flow better.

Disclaimer: I own the Novaks- well, besides Casey. Everyone else is Dick Wolf's

Note: After someone brought this to my attention, I realized I had to clarify something. This fanficiton is based off something that happened to a friend, not me. In fact, he even helped write the flashback scene in Chapter 11. Sorry for any confusion.

Chapter 1

Casey took a deep, shaky breath, trying to calm herself down, but it only took one look at the house to nearly send her into yet another panic attack.

"Shh, shh, calm down, girl," she tried to soothe herself, knowing that now, of all times, she could not freak out. All she had to do was walk inside, take a look around, then leave. Not too dangerous. That was all she had to do... right?

"God damn it," she muttered under her breath, leaning her head against the car door. "I don't want to do this." Never had a truer statement been spoken, because God knows she didn't want to do this. No, no, no she didn't. God, he could kill her. He could and she would be too damn weak to stop him. And yet, she had no choice. By going into that house, she was voluntarily offering herself up for sacrifice. Linda and Shelly had no choice in this, though. And Casey would rather die than let them suffer through the hell she had, so many years ago.

Besides, it had just been a one time thing, right? That horrifying night, it had only happened once anyway. The chances of it being repeated now were slim to none. Plus, she did have precautions to make sure it wouldn't happen again... yes, yes she did. Casey smiled coldly as she ran her hand along the slim object hidden by her shirt, stroking the cold knife like it was a fluffy kitten instead of a weapon used to kill. "Come on, girl," she tried to convince herself again, "Just a couple minutes, that's all. Then you can leave."

And then, that cruel voice in her head added on, It's either this or two funerals.

That was all Casey needed. Buttoning up her jacket to hide her knife, Casey got out of her rental and hurried up to the house, all the while trying to resist the urge to throw up right there on the sidewalk. When she reached the door, it took almost all of her strength not to flee and, instead, raise her hand up shakily to knock.

Casey was about to jump for joy when no one answered when, just a moment later, it opened to reveal the man of the hour himself, Mark Novak. "Casey!" he exclaimed, pleasantly shocked, wrapping his strong arms around her in a hug. "What a surprise!"

As usual, it took her a few seconds to calm herself down when he touched her, to stop being afraid that he would hurt her. She even managed to return the hug, something that made her quite proud of herself indeed. "Hey, Mark," she said as she embraced him back.

Finally, he stepped back and let her breathe, and as her panic began to subside Casey looked him over. With her red hair and green eyes, Casey was an oddity of the Novak family- her father had been adopted into it, so the majority of her relatives, like Mark, had brown hair and blue eyes. He was as tan and muscular as ever, strong enough to do a pull up with only two fingers. "So, what brings the great prosecutor back down to my humble abode?" he asked, smiling at her. "Got any more stories where you throw the badasses in jail to tell me?"

She shrugged, trying not to think about the irony of the situation. "Oh, sure, sure, I always do," she said as he stepped back, allowing her to come inside. She looked around, inspecting her surroundings closely, but she could not see any signs of a fight. She gave a sigh of relief before getting to the real reason of her visit. "But hey, are Shelly and Linda here? I feel like I haven't seen them in forever!"

Mark laughed and rolled his eyes. "Oh, there we go, the ulterior motive! Casey Novak would never come see her big brother unless she wanted to discuss, hair, boys, or makeup with my wife and daughter!" Casey blushed and pretended that he was right, because if they weren't here, she needed to get out of here, and now. "Shelly, Linda!" he called loudly. "Get down here, you'll never guess who's here!"

Casey turned to the stairs, keeping one hand resting on the hidden knife, using its cool temperature to calm her. They were going to be fine. They had to be.

Two people came down the stairs, one a woman, one just a little girl. The woman was short, petite, with soft brown hair and eyes and a hesitant smile. She looked like... well, as much as Casey hated to admit, the average victims she spoke with in her office.

The sling she wore on her arm didn't help much, either.

Next was the child, with her mother's good hand rested protectively on her shoulder. She was almost an identical twin to Linda, though she took after her father and had cool blue eyes instead of brown. She was quite thankful that Shelly took after her mother for almost everything besides her eyes- with curly, light brown pigtails and pale skin, many people always called her an angel. Casey herself was guilty of that.

Of course, angels don't normally have black eyes.

"Oh! Linda, Shelly!" Casey exclaimed, trying to hide her horror. "What happened?"

Linda glanced quickly at her husband before she said meekly, "Car crash. I was driving Shelly to school when a taxi hit us."

Oh god no, he hit them, he hit them both and it's my fault, oh god, everything, now, everything is my fault, no no no! Casey tried desperately to keep her expression neutral, though she knew what had to be done now. She had only one choice. "Oh, that's not good," she said lightly, trying and probably failing to give them a lighthearted smile. "Well, actually, here's the real reason for my impromptu visit, Mark- I, uh... Well, one of my friends gave me his cat to look after for a couple days, and it turns out, my apartment building has a no pets policy. I got evicted last night."

Mark's eyes widened in concern, though Linda didn't even look up. Shelly was rooted to the spot next to her mother and didn't look like she'd be moving any time soon. "Oh, Casey, that's terrible!" he exclaimed, taking a step towards her. She almost fainted in terror at that. "Where are you going to stay?"

She forced herself to smile as she said, "Well, uh... I was sort of hoping that I could, you know... stay here?" The words made her want to throw up, but they had to be said. His response made her want to run screaming from the room.

"Oh, Casey, of course you can. You're my baby sister." He gave her a light hug, then said, "I'll go make up the guest room for you."

He turned and headed up the stairs. As he passed Linda and Shelly, it was impossible for Casey not to notice them both shy away and the pure terror in the little girl's eyes as he brushed past her, barely touching her shoulder. With a guilty moan, Casey collapsed onto the couch, already exhausted just thinking about the coming months. "Linda, Shelly," she murmured, beckoning to them. "Over here."

Shelly didn't move until her mother started walking towards Casey as well. She could see the horror in Linda's expression, and she knew exactly where it was coming from. Well, too bad, Linda. This is my mess to clean up, not yours. I won't let him hurt you again. Linda sat down next to her, keeping her distance, and Shelly clung to her mother's side until Casey reached over and gently took her hand, giving her a soft smile. "Hey, Shelly," she murmured. "Its okay, I'm not going to hurt you. I promise."

The little girl just looked at her, then nuzzled her head into the crook of Casey's arm and curled up beside her, closing her eyes immediately. Casey blinked as hot tears started to make her way down her cheeks, and it was then that she realized that Shelly hadn't even spoken a word since she had arrived. Poor girl, she must be exhausted… and terrified.

Then she looked back up at Linda and hurriedly wiped her tears away before saying, "Listen, Linda... I know you weren't hit by a taxi. I know it was Mark." At first there was pure shock on her face, and Casey quickly continued before Linda had even processed that, knowing that she didn't have much time. "I am staying with you from now until you can get a divorce. I can stop him from hurting you or Shelly, I promise. Now-"

"But- but, Casey- how did you-"

"Come on, Linda, keep up," Casey said, snapping her fingers. "We don't have much time until Mark comes back."

The younger woman stammered hesitantly, eyes wide with shock, "Wait! M- Mark said, if I got a divorce, he would take Shelly!"

Casey had suspected as much. "I know, come by my office tomorrow at noon so I can tell you my plan, we don't have much time." This was the harder part of the conversation, what she really didn't want to say but that she knew was required. She had planned this for a while, now, but only worked up the courage to come see if it was necessary today. It was her fault he was doing this and she wasn't going to allow two innocent victims get hit when she was a perfectly good target for his rage. "Now, listen, I know its difficult, but when Mark attacks you, scream. That's all you have to do, and I will come, and I will keep you safe- I promise. Just take Shelly and get her out of the house until the next day. All right?"

"But... Casey, I... how... when did you-"

"Casey!" Mark called from upstairs, interrupting Linda's shocked question. "The guest room's ready!"

Casey immediately stood up, being careful not to disturb Shelly, and murmured to Linda, "You must promise me you'll do this! Its okay, trust me. Please, promise me!"

Linda stared at her in complete shock, then slowly managed to give an amazed nod. "Good," Casey whispered before standing up and walking away, not sure how Mark would react if he saw the three talking. She heard Mark coming down the stairs and nodded reassuring at Linda before turning to face the abuser. "Hey, Mark. Thanks for letting me stay here, I really appreciate it."

He shrugged. "It's no problem- Linda, would you mind putting Shelly to bed? It's late and, quite honestly, she should have been asleep an hour ago."

All this was said with a smile, and Casey wasn't sure whether or not she imagined the fear in Shelly's voice when she replied, "Sorry, Daddy."

Mark smiled and ruffled his daughter's hair. "It's okay, kiddo." Linda took Shelly's hand, then, and led the sleepy girl upstairs. The moment they were gone, Mark turned to face Casey, still smiling. "Hey, Case, listen... would you mind making sure Shelly doesn't know about your work? I mean, she's a little young, and I don't think stories about child molesters or-"

"Oh, Mark, of course not! I'm not an idiot, I would never tell her stuff like that!" Casey exclaimed, all the while trying not to realize the irony. "Don't even think that," she said softly before picking up the sports bag she had dropped off by the door. "Thanks for taking me in like this, Mark, I really appreciate it."

"Shush, you," he said fondly, tousling her hair. "You're my little sister, Casey, so trust me when I say its not a problem."

Casey smiled, then forced herself to give him a light hug, though she was already falling for his sweet, innocent brother act all over again. "Well, all right," she said doubtfully, then pulled back and continued, "but I didn't get any sleep last night, so would you two mind if I just went up to bed?"

"Oh, not at all," he said and started leading her upstairs. "Why didn't you get any sleep last night?"

Casey hesitated briefly before saying simply, "Oh, you know, the job. My detectives needed an emergency warrant."

Mark just rolled his eyes and nodded. "Well, you go on up to bed now. Call me if you need anything." Casey nodded her thanks, but the moment he had left and the door to her new room was shut, she slumped against the wall, closing her eyes against the tears.

God, she had known. She had known when he got his first girlfriend after that night that it was dangerous. How many women had been beaten or raped over the years because she had been too terrified to speak up? God, how many lives could have remained sweet and carefree if she had just stayed and protected them? All her fault... all her fault...

SVU SVU SVU

Whether it was just luck or the gods smiling down upon her, she did not know, but nothing happened that night. She didn't hear any sounds from Linda indicating that something might be wrong- and Casey had gotten up to check several times, knowing from personal experience how hard it was to call for help in that situation, but Linda and Shelly were both safe… well, as safe as they could be under the circumstances.

Casey, though, exhausted as she was, had not slept. As a child, she had known how dangerous it was to sleep while he was awake, but had done so anyways, unwilling to admit the stupidity of her actions, denying that anything was wrong. Now, though, she could not allow herself to deny anything. Denial could get Linda or Shelly killed.

So she walked down the stairs, a bright smile on her lips, pretending to be carefree. "Good morning, Mark," she said as she walked into the kitchen. "Linda, Shelly." Linda was fixing breakfast while Shelly ate quickly, and Mark was drinking a cup of coffee while he read the paper... the perfect picture of a family. All it needed was a white picket fence and a son for Mark to play catch with and Casey could deny the past again and trust him.

"Hey, Casey," Mark said, glancing up from the paper and smiling at her.

Linda shot a smile at her over her shoulder and Shelly kept her eyes fixated on the plate before her. Casey was starting to think that Mark had told her not to talk with adults- he didn't want her spilling 'family' secrets, like the fact that he beat both his wife and daughter most every night. Well, that was going to stop soon. "Morning, Casey. Can I fix you something?" Linda asked from over by the stove.

It almost broke Casey's heart that the woman was able to show kindness to her, after everything she had gone through because Casey hadn't warned her about the dangers of marrying Mark. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she shook her head and said, "No, that's okay, I'm going to pick up something on the way to work." She gave Linda a meaningful look at that, hoping that she remembered to meet her at her office before starting to sort through the papers in her briefcase, pretending to be searching for something. In reality, she was just waiting for Linda and Shelly to leave so she could leave herself.

Finally, Linda stood up and took Shelly's hand, nodding at her. "Time to go to school, Shelly."

The little girl immediately hopped down off the chair to the ground and nodded. "Okay. Hey, Mommy, can I go to Lindsey's house after school? She promised me that I could play with her dolls and then she said that she had a real shiny one named..." Shelly's voice trailed off as she walked out of earshot, and Casey was unable to resist a smile- she still seemed so... childlike, even after everything she had been through. God... it was so unfair that the innocence of these years had been stolen away from her.

With a heavy sigh, Casey closed her briefcase and got to her feet. "Well, I've got to go to work. I'll see you later tonight?" she asked Mark, wishing the answer was no though knowing it would be yes.

And, sure enough, he nodded and said, "Yep." He put his and Shelly's dishes in the sink, then got up and followed her out. Casey knew he was just going to work, too... but the fact that he was behind her... and bigger than her, and stronger... frankly, it terrified her.

Finally, when she was safely inside her rental with all the doors locked, Casey let out a heavy sigh of relief and started driving. She felt the, by now, familiar pang of nausea in her stomach but shook her head, tightening her grip on the wheel. No, no, not yet. She had to make it to work. She couldn't get sick yet.

Thankfully, she didn't have court today, so she could go straight to her office. Once there, she knew she had a good four hours before Linda would come by. That was four hours for her to use to break down. Sleep was not an option. She had to get everything done at work now- there wasn't a very big chance she'd get to finish up anything at home. Not anymore.

So, while tears slowly trickled down her face, she started working, trying not to make any noise so as not to attract attention. There were periods of time when she was able to focus on the papers in front of her and not let her thoughts get distracted by images of Linda and Shelly being beaten by her own brother, but, most of the time, she was struggling not to just fall apart and start sobbing. And, of course, the nausea was so bad that, sometimes she actually did throw up into the trash can beside her desk.

Unfortunately for her, Olivia walked in right when she was throwing up, her face still streaked with tears. She stood there in shock for a second, then rushed over to her, kneeling down beside her in concern. "Casey?" she asked in bewilderment, holding back her hair gently as Casey emptied the contents of her stomach- hell, she hadn't even eaten anything in the past twenty four hours, what on earth was there to throw up?- into the trash can. When she was done, Casey scooted away and leaned back against her desk weakly, still trembling as she averted her eyes from Olivia's concerned gaze. "Casey?" she asked again. "What's the matter?"

She just shrugged, knowing that admitting the truth was not an option. "I'm... I'm just..." she panted, trying to search for an excuse. "I'm just fighting off a stomach bug, that's all."

Olivia shook her head, unconvinced. "Well, you shouldn't be at work if you're this sick..."

Casey glanced up at her and tried to smile. "Well, you know me. Workaholic," she offered lamely. Olivia frowned and was about to ask another question when Casey asked one of her own. "So, Detective, what can I do for you?" she asked as pleasantly as possible while she pulled herself up into her desk chair. "Warrant?"

Olivia frowned again, then said, "Casey, you're not avoiding this discussion. Wasn't it you who said just last week that you would only take off work if you're throwing up? Well, you're-"

"I didn't say that I would take off work, I just said that that was the only reason I would. Look, Olivia, I really do have a lot of work to do, would you mind just..." she trailed off when she saw a man in the hallway. It wasn't Mark, it couldn't be. But... but it looked just like him... no, no, no! Casey fought for each breath as she examined him carefully, and god every feature she could see looked exactly the same and, in her already weakened state, it was too much for Casey and she collapsed sideways out the chair, falling to the floor in a heap.

Olivia hurried forward, immediately getting down beside her. "Okay, that's it, Casey, I'm taking you home. You still live in-"

"No!" she exclaimed fiercely before she started coughing. As Casey once again found herself in a struggle for each breath, her eyes caught sight of the clock in the wall- it was noon. Oh, god, Linda! Immediately pulling herself back up towards her desk in alarm, Casey pulled a sleeve across her mouth and tried to compose herself. "Look, Liv," she said, her voice hoarse, "I promise, I'm fine. Now, I have a meeting that's supposed to be happening right now, so-"

At that moment, Casey's office door opened and Linda stepped inside. She kept her eyes glued to the floor and her good arm was held tightly to her side. Now, Olivia may have been completely in the dark as to what was going on, but that didn't mean she couldn't recognize a battered woman when she saw one. She immediately saw the telltale signs, which didn't really surprise her- Casey was, after all, a sex crimes ADA... but Olivia didn't recognize the victim from any of their cases.

"Casey?" she asked in surprise, looking the woman up in down. "Who is this?"

The woman looked up and, when she saw the detective, she immediately backed away and said, "Oh, Casey, I'm sorry, I didn't realize you weren't alone- I'll just go and-"

"No, you won't 'just go'." Casey got to her feet and took the woman's hand tenderly, pulling her back inside her office. "Detective Benson was just leaving." Casey gave Olivia a cold look and nodded at the door before sitting back down at her desk across from Linda.

Olivia stared at them both for a second before slowly backing away towards the door. "Right... Casey, I'll call you about the warrant later," she said before heading out, wondering what on earth was up with the ADA.

As soon as the door was closed, Casey turned towards Linda with a small smile. "Hey, Linda. Sorry about that. Anyways, since you have to leave to pick up Linda at two thirty, I'll be brief: if you divorced Mark now, he would still have a right for custody with Shelly. Even if I had him arrested on assault the next time he attacked you, it wouldn't be enough- as horrible as this sounds, unless he used a weapon, he'd get slapped with a misdemeanor. That's just one year in prison, at the most, Linda… and Shelly's only five. And, trust me when I say this, the courts would not be kind to you just because your husband was abusive. There's no telling which judge you got for your case- in fact, I know a couple who would make Shelly visit with her father simply because of your last name: they don't really like me." Linda was about to interrupt when Casey raised her hand like a traffic cop, shaking her head. "Wait up a sec, I have a plan. While assault wouldn't get him in jail long enough... attempted murder would." Casey took a deep breath before continuing on with her next proposition, because there was no way in hell she was going to sit idly while Linda got hit. She was going to use sleep deprivation to dull her emotions to get through this meeting and deal with her fear later; this was her only option. "Now, I'm willing to take the beatings for you, but when one of them is bad enough to be called attempted murder, it will most likely put me in the hospital. Even then, don't tell the police. I'm a lawyer, I'll know when one of them is bad enough to be classified as attempted murder. But, until then-"

"Wait, Casey," Linda interrupted quickly, eyes wide with shock. "Wait. Mark... he's my husband, and... and you can't- I can't allow you to take... I can't allow him to hit you and do nothing! I..."

"You won't be doing nothing," Casey assured her. "Whenever Mark attacks you, just scream. I will come, I promise, I'll trade places with you- you, however, have to get Shelly out of that house until the next day. And the reason we can't switch roles is because, first of all, you're Shelly's mother. Right now, you're the only person she trusts, which is understandable- so she wouldn't go with me without a fight for a long while. Also... Linda, I've dealt with him before. I can handle him. He won't kill me. He'll reign himself in before I'm dead. You... I'm not so sure of."

Linda continued to stare at her in complete shock for a moment, then stammered, "B- but Casey, I... I c- can't... h-how... how did you know? I m-mean, I n-never told anyone..."

"Shh," Casey said softly, shaking her head. "It's okay, don't worry about that now. Just... promise me that you'll scream. Trust me, I've been there, I know it hurts, but... you have to. Please."

Linda hesitated a moment longer, shaking her head as she said, "But, Casey, you don't have to do this- this is my daughter, my husband, you shouldn't get hurt just because-"

"Linda," she interrupted, reaching across the desk to take the young woman's hand into her own. "This is my choice. You haven't coerced me in any way. Please don't feel guilty about this. It's for the greater good. It will keep Shelly safe and no one will die. Please, Linda."

Finally, she agreed. "I... all right. But Casey, if you, at any time want to back out of this, you can. By all means, don't stay with us out of some fake belief of duty."

Casey nodded, satisfied, though dreading the months to come. "Of course. Now, Linda, one more thing before you go... did Mark... did he ever... okay, this may be too personal a question, but did he ever ra... did he ever ra... rape you?"

Linda blinked, shocked. "I... no. No, he hasn't. Casey, why-"

"No time for questions," she said, forcing a smile. "Come on, if Mark found out you were here, can you imagine what'd he do? Hurry now, head back over to your job. I'll be home in your home at 2:30 sharp. I promise." Linda continued to stare at her in confusion as she got up and left. The moment the door was closed, Casey leaned back with a sigh of relief. Easy part done, impossible stuff left to tackle... sounded like her normal, typical day. Without the life-threatening bastard waiting for her, of course.

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