The credits for Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire began rolling, declaring that movie night was officially over in Blue Base.

"Damn." Tex stated.

"So that fuckin' guy without a nose is back, and killed Edward Cullen?" asked Tucker as he reached for the remote to turn off the TV.

"He's Cedric Diggory in this movie. And his name is Lord Voldemort, dumbass." Church scoffed.

Caboose shook as he clung to his 'friend', "Church! I'm scared of Voldemort!"

Tucker turned the TV off and set the remote down on the table, "So what happens in the next movie?"

"You can just read the books." Church suggested. "I did."

"Fuck that."

"I'd rather go to Hoggywarts." Caboose announced.

"Hogwarts…" Church muttered.

"I agree with Caboose," Tex said, "It'd be better than hanging out with you assholes."

"I could be like Hairy Potter!" Caboose jeered and childishly clapped his hands.

"Harry Potter." Church corrected him.

"Wow, you seem pretty defensive of this Potter world." Tucker laughed at him. "An adult obsessing over a children's book?"

"Well, I wouldn't expect you to understand." Church's hands clenched into fists.

"What's not to understand about a bunch of teenagers waving their sticks around for two hours? Bow chicka bow wow!"

"There's more to it than that…" Wash sighed at Tucker's immaturity.

"Agent Washingtub! I forgot you were here!" Caboose shouted.

"Don't tell me you're one too?" Tucker asked grudgingly.

"A what?"

"He means a Potterhead." Church informed him.

"Then yeah." Wash told Tucker. "And you're an idiot for not recognizing how amazing it is."

"Okay, look. I'm sure being a fuckin' wizard is fun. But being a stupid—what's it called?" Tucker asked.

"A Muggle." Church and Wash suggested.

"A Tucker." Caboose said.

"Yeah, a Muggle." Tucker continued. "It's stupid being one and having to watch freakin' witches and wizards do magic when we can't do shit."

"You sure can bitch a lot." Church laughed.

Tucker snapped, "You shut the fuck up or I'll—"

"Well, I'm going to bed," Tex declared, "Goodnight assholes."

"I'll be there in a few minutes." Church told her as she left the room.

"So you expect to walk into the teleporter and appear in fuckin' Hogwarts?" Tucker asked.

"I never said that!" Wash shouted at him.

And for the first time in a while, Caboose had an idea. He grinned to himself at the thought of how happy it would make Church. Glancing at the three whose argument seemed to have turned into more of a shouting match, he scurried off to bed to think of his plan. His simple, yet amazing plan.

"Hey…" Tucker yawned as he walked into the kitchen the next morning.

"Mmm…" Church groaned in response. He had a cup of coffee in one hand and he stared blankly at the wall in front of him.

"Hello!" Caboose greeted cheerfully as he rushed into the kitchen, wide awake.

"There's cereal in the cabinet." Tex said as she brushed passed Tucker and out of the kitchen.

Tucker growled as he opened the cabinet, "Is this all we ever fucking have? Cereal?"

"Yeah, sorry. All we've got is Muggle food." Wash apologized.

"Can we shut the fuck up about that? I already told you guys that you're right…" Tucker said grimly.

"It's just fun being right." Church said groggily.

"Lucky Charms!" Caboose shouted as he pulled the box out of the cabinet.

"Don't just eat the marshmallows this time." Wash told him.

"Well," Church said as he stood up and stretched, "I'm gonna go take a shower."

"Church, wait!" Caboose shouted with his mouth full of cereal.

"It can wait till later." Church said and left the room.

The blonde pushed the box of cereal away from him, taking the opportunity to go into Church's room to retrieve his copy of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

"C'mon, Church! This will make you happier than ever!" Caboose yelled as he dragged Church by the arm to the top of the base.

"Caboose, what the fuck is so important that you have to show me?" Church asked angrily as sunlight hit his face, making him squint his eyes.

"You'll see!"

Wash, Tucker and Tex were already outside and yelling about something. But when they saw that Caboose and Church had arrived, they turned their attention towards them.

Finally, Caboose let go of Church, "Stay there." He told him. The blonde walked over to the flashy green teleporter.

Church crossed his arms over his chest. He thought, this isn't gonna turn out well…

"Behold!" Caboose shouted dramatically, "The teleporter!"

"Wow…" Tucker mused. "You discovered something that has already been discovered."

Caboose bent over and opened a very small compartment on the side of the machine. He then pulled out Church's copy of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

Church shouted, "Wait, Caboose—what the hell are you—"

Caboose stuffed the book into the compartment.

Whatever was inside the teleporter's compartment shredded the book causing bits of paper to fly everywhere.

Wash, Tucker and Tex just stared in amazement.

"What the fuck! You idiot! You just ruined—" Church was red in the face from yelling. He turned around, resisting the urge to murder Caboose, and began walking back into the base.

"Wait, no! Church, that means it's working!" Caboose yelled.

Church kept walking.

Desperate to get his attention, Caboose dashed into the teleporter and disappeared with a soft whoosh.

Church angrily rolled his eyes and turned around, "That fucking idiot is gonna get himself killed." He walked through the teleporter, followed by another soft whoosh.

"They're both gonna die…" Wash sighed and followed Church.

Whoosh.

Tex looked at Tucker, "After you."

"No fuckin' way! I'm gonna get covered in that black stuff!" Tucker protested.

"Oh, don't be such a baby." Tex smiled and shoved him through the teleporter.

Whoosh.

She followed Tucker.

Whoosh.

"Caboose! Caboose, where the fuck are you?" Church yelled over the loud noise. His voice cracked a little bit, but he shrugged it off as Caboose approached him and grabbed his hand.

"C'mon, Church! Let's go to Hoggywarts!" A rather young looking Caboose said as he pushed through the crowd filled with people in robes, pushing trolleys, owls in cages.

Caboose continued to pull Church's hand, guiding him through the crowd.

"Wha—?" Church looked up and saw a huge train with the words 'Hogwarts Express' written on the side. Church stopped letting Caboose drag him.

"Caboose," He spoke slowly, "What in the hell did you do?"