In An Instant
Chapter 12: The Art and Consequences of Letting Go
GENRES: Drama, Romance, Humor, Tragedy, Angst, ...pretty much everything. So...gen?
MILD CHARACTERIZATION SPOILERS for Chris Colfer's Struck By Lightning!
WARNINGS: lots of mentions of Sex and a shit ton of snark. Also, sexual tension. As if that wasn't already obvious.
PAIRING: Jesse St. James and Carson Phillips AKA Jarson AKA St. Phillips AKA Jarson St. Phillips. There may be mentions of other pairings down the line, especially ones from GLEE.
WORD COUNT: 5768
"Carson, babe, have you ever considered that you work too hard?"
"Jesse, is that on the list of acceptable endearment terms I gave you?"
"No. All that paper said was 'Carson'."
"Exactly. There was a reason for that."
Jesse rolled onto his side and stared at Carson's back.
"I've been thinking…"
"Uh-oh," Carson sighed, pushing away from the desk. "What now?"
"What do you call me to your friends?"
"An idiot," Carson said point blank before rolling his eyes and standing quickly, arching his back and stretching his arms.
"Jesse, you know I have no friends, at least that aren't family in some way, shape, or form. And you already introduced yourself to all of them a long time ago, if you forgot. Over facebook. By claiming to be fucking me. They tend to refer to you as whatever expletive feels right in the moment. Usually with Andrew it's along the lines of curly-haired-motherfucker. Why?"
"But I'm the curly-haired-motherfucker that you also call your boyfriend, right?"
Carson snorted.
"Did those words actually just leave your mouth?"
Jesse narrowed his eyes haughtily.
"Of course they did, Casper. It's existentially romantic."
"Yeah…not really using existentially right, sweetheart."
"I'm giving you the side-eye right now so hard. And, if you didn't know the side-eye is-"
Carson groaned.
"Jesse, I know I'm not the most familiar with current slang, but I do know basics. Is it your time of the month right now or something?"
Jesse scowled.
"I'm horny and sex-deprived, and I like romantic things, so I want my boyfriend to say for once that he actually is my boyfriend, instead of treating a golden nugget like me like a dirty little secret. I may be willing to get dirty, but the rest of that should never apply to Jesse St. James."
Carson watched him a moment, expression inscrutable, then moved to sit beside Jesse on the bed.
"I don't like the word boyfriend," he said after a moment. "It feels strange. You know better than anyone that this is all new to me. But, from my research, everyone says compromise is the foundation of any relationship. So… I've called you my boyfriend in my head a few times. I'll just start saying it out loud now. Better?"
Jesse sighed dramatically, and extended a hand towards Carson, who watched it warily for a long moment. Then, belatedly:
"Oh. You wanted me to hold it?"
Jesse's lips quirked in amusement, dark eyes glinting as Carson's hand inched forward, the other boy's forehead wrinkling, and, finally, the fingers connected and intertwined.
Jesse looked at their locked hands and then at Carson, and then leaned forward to breathe hotly over their fingers, watching with satisfaction as Carson's flesh tensed, a small shiver darting through the limb, fingers twitching against Jesse's palm.
"I think you're giving me a teacher fetish," he observed, head cocking slightly. Carson coughed.
"Is this really all you wanted?"
"Sex would be nice too."
"Jesse…"
"Yes?"
"No. …What is that look for?"
Jesse turned away dramatically, pulling his hand from Carson's.
"You need to use a pet name for me."
"This may be the most ridiculous and inane conversation we've ever had," Carson informed Jesse, annoyance audible in his ringing voice. "Jesse St. James, we do not live in a chick flick, no matter how much you want to believe we do."
"I'm pretty sure this is really a revamped version of Ten Things I Hate About You," Jesse replied confidently. "I'm sure everyone in the theater is desperate for us to just get it on already."
"That would only be because people these days are almost as sex-crazed as dolphins are."
Jesse frowned at him.
"Since when are cute sea creatures sex-crazed?"
Carson snorted, hand moving slowly forward to reclaim its place in Jesse's.
"Sweetheart, they've always been that way. They'll try having sex with just about everything."
Jesse smirked.
"Only you could make the word sweetheart sound identical to the word idiot. And good for them! At least we know the dolphins are getting some then. Someone should be."
"Jesse, you're like the real life Anne Shirley. Has anyone ever told you that? Not having sex for…how long has it been since you last had sex?"
Jesse pulled a face.
"That sounds a lot like a trap."
"And that sounds like a pile of crap."
Jesse beamed at him.
"Okay, I have to give you some style points for the rhyming there. That was pretty good. And I have the perfect reward in mind…"
Carson eyed him, expression deadpan.
"No sex. I am not a whore. And I don't want my boyfriend to be one either. Got it?"
"It's who I am," Jesse whined. "It's in my blood."
"No, it's in your brain. In the hormones released. And the only place blood has in any of this is where it keeps going."
Jesse smirked slightly, tugging at Carson's hand abruptly, so that the other fell on his side, and then wrapped himself around him, angling a thrust at his boyfriend's thigh.
"You mean here?"
Carson glowered at him, disentangling himself.
"Did I ask for a demonstration?"
"It was my brain," Jesse said, grinning, and Carson sighed, but didn't move from his side, in fact wriggling just ever so slightly closer.
Their shoulders and thighs were warm against each other, and hands were still held tight. Carson stared at their fingers together for a moment, then sighed again.
"You're destroying my IQ, sweetheart," he said glumly, though with an undertone of teasing. "I always thought I was so much smarter than all of this. And I didn't need or want any of it."
"Oh well," Jesse replied lightly, pulling Carson ever so slightly closer, and smiling when Carson didn't fight it, but moved himself closer as well. "You could stand to lose a few of those babe. You'll still be smarter than four-fifths of the Earth's population, even if you lose a hundred."
Carson laughed full out, turning so that he was pressed fully against Jesse's side, smothering the sounds of his ringing pleasure into his boyfriend's chest.
"You either think exceptionally highly of me, or alarmingly little of the rest of the world, 'babe'. I'm not really sure which option I prefer."
"It's starting to be both," Jesse said truthfully. "Which reminds me. Who else's work are you doing now?"
Carson stiffened, then shrugged into Jesse's side, his fingers tightening their coil around Jesse's own.
"I don't know what you mean."
Jesse raised an eyebrow at him and Carson scowled.
"Oh, don't give me that look, St. James."
"And don't give me that bullshit, Phillips," Jesse retorted nonchalantly. "I happen to be able to read you pretty well by now, you know? Whose is it?"
Carson took in Jesse's words a moment, then, slowly, moved forward, up the bed, and even closer to Jesse, who watched him with bemusement but interest.
"Jesse… I don't know what difference it makes, but my load at school just got a bit bigger, okay? That's all. I'm in a bunch of AP classes. It happens. I'll admit though…Seeing you like this is a little…hot, to me."
Jesse laughed.
"Me asking about you is a turn on now?"
"Maybe," Carson said, undaunted, legs abruptly going on either side of Jesse, straddling him firmly. Beneath him, Jesse pulled himself up as best he could. "What do you think?"
And Carson ground down just as firmly as he'd straddled his boyfriend, an unmistakable hardness gaining Jesse's attention.
"This is new…" Jesse murmured, eyes on his boyfriend's, battling between his lust and the complete understanding that this was Carson's method of diverting him.
Lust just so happened to be winning.
"But new things are good."
A little growl escaped Jesse's throat before he could stop it, and he felt the rest of the blood fueling his brain finish rushing southward.
What the hell did diversion matter?
"Very good. Very, very good," he replied throatily.
Carson grinned, and the satisfaction and clear pride on his face was just enough to wipe away the last traces of Jesse's concern.
Carson leaned forward over him, warm, moist breath ghosting over Jesse's throat, which he then studiously pressed his lips against, biting lightly, and sucking determinedly.
The faint pain only made it all the more erotic, and Jesse's heart beat wildly as he watched, enamored with the sight, and the obscene sounds forthcoming.
If he wasn't such a sex master, he was pretty sure he'd have already come on that alone.
The wet sounds of Carson's actions washed over him, and he ground up, and Carson met this as well, maintaining an air of study that made Jesse want to laugh, cry, and kiss Carson until they melted into one another and became one.
Although that would make sexing each other up a little difficult.
Which would suck, because damn his boyfriend just seemed to get hotter, even if it was in the absolute strangest ways possible.
Carson's every move and action right now was so obviously thought through and researched, and it was that that Jesse found turning himself on the most. Carson had clearly had this on his mind more than he wanted to admit, and was more interested than he showed. There was so much that showed on Carson's expressive face, and so many ways his eyes and his mouth (definitely, his mouth) worked, but there was even more beneath, locked away.
Jesse's free hand, because for reasons he was unsure of the pair of them were still clinging hands, clenching twined fingers like copulation itself, their palms writhing against one another in time with their heated movement, in a steady, unstoppable magnetization, seized Carson's hip then back then hip again, found where Carson's shirt had risen or his jeans had fallen or something, and smoothed over the bare skin, tantalizing and heated, so fucking heated, and grasped as firmly at the flesh as he had his boyfriend's hand, moving over it with want and need and some indecipherable feeling that some line had already been crossed, so there were no fucks left to give, and if no "no" was said, then he'd be going as far as he could possibly get.
Carson grunted softly as he worked, and pressed into Jesse's hand, the sensations overwhelming him, his vision growing blurry around the edges even as every one of his senses seemed sharpened to the max, the volume on the world turned all the way up.
"Carson."
And, without question, because at a time like this questions always could be saved for later, Carson automatically ground himself down hard, their heartbeats throbbing against one another, and moved up abruptly, a popping cracking into the air as he released his suction on Jesse's throat and went instead for his mouth, diving in with heaving breath and inhibitions caught still processing the flow of events from the first moment his teeth sank to nibble at a sharp juncture in his boyfriend's throat, baser instincts taking control in their stead for what may well have been the first true time in Carson's life.
Thought was nearly impossible, other than the burning, throbbing note of closerclosercloser.
And closer they got, as close as they could, then closer still.
Heat and musk clung to every particle of air in the small room. A pulsating need, burning itch drove up Carson's spine, trembled through his arms and fingers and toes and eyes, shuddered out in clenching, locking limbs, and jerking, desperate need for whatever semblance of more there was, even if it was past what some part of his mind, lost as it was, still recognized as too much.
He didn't care about that right now. All that mattered was more…
His free hand moved of its own accord to get as much of that more he wantedneeded so much, and wormed its way towards closer, sliding over the burning skin of Jesse's abdomen beneath his shirt, then going back down to pull at the shirt's hem, murmuring an urging of "off" onto Jesse's tongue before sucking the word away once more.
But Jesse got the message and together they moved Jesse's shirt up and off, Carson shaking and practically growling with want, Jesse moaning and licking his lips every five or so seconds.
Carson's mind blurred again as his own shirt came off, and their naked chests pressed tight against one another as they returned to kissing, desperately invading one another's mouths, memorizing, mapping, as if preparing a course for some future venture.
Jesse moved to lick at a tender spot just behind Carson's ear that made him mewl sharply, and then another at the crook of his knee that made his entire body contact when Jesse rubbed a bent finger behind it as he pulled Carson further in. And Carson found that, rather predictably for a vocalist, Jesse's throat was one big hot spot, but also, a little less predictably, Carson's blunt nails against the middle of his back made stars absolutely explode behind his eyelids.
Jesse mumbled something about showing him a true performance and they adjusted together, Carson barely aware by this point, until he was dragged back by the indelible, mind-blowing sensation of smothering wetness and soft nibbling at one of his nipples, while their hands slipped and slid and made love between the sheets, and Jesse's free hand clenched and twisted around Carson's side, making the boy seize up and moan tautly into the air, red as an apple, ripe for the taking.
It was at this juncture in time, Jesse's teeth and tongue swirling about a nipple, free fingers pinching just below Carson's ribs, scratching ever so slightly, that a shout sprouted and spread through the room, and the boys froze, or at least Carson did, since Jesse wasn't stopping for anything right now. Carson's breath hitched, his limbs locked, his eyes burst open (though he didn't even remember when it was they had closed, since he was sure, so sure that he had seen everything, every minute, of this tryst with Jesse. How could he not have?). Jesse ground up, groaning, the words "close" and "come on" and a whine, a wanton whimper that resounded in Carson's ears and sounded suspiciously like his name.
"Fuck no, fuck no, fuck no. What the hell is going on here?"
"Andrew, calm down. Let's go!"
Amy's voice was high and panicked. Andrew's angry and stricken.
Carson lurched off of his boyfriend, heartbeat somehow quickening even more, reaching a pace so fast he was sure it would burst from his chest any second.
He wasn't sure he would mind.
God, how stupid was he?
The hard sound of flesh hitting flesh felt like a hit to Carson himself, and he flinched from it, wincing, sickness rising, before snapping up, because the hit wasn't to himself but to his boyfriend, and goddammit, he loved Andrew but he was a big boy and could make his own decisions, and fuck, but he'd been kind of in the middle of something, and had his cousins completely forgotten what phones were or something?
Carson stood sharply, and went to his cousin, all his rage and shame and confusion going into the punch he delivered to his cousin's cheek, and the man stared at him in shock for all of a second before returning at full force, and Carson took the hit hard to his bare stomach, breath whooshing out, gasping at the sharp pain.
He'd not taken into account the very clear differences in strength between himself and Andrew, who had had an addiction to weight training for a while, in an effort to prove himself worthy of a fraternity he later nearly took over before abandoning completely.
Carson hit the ground hard, and he heard a high-pitched sound of furious rebuke before a clear, weighty smack jolted the thick, muggy, sex-filled air, and Carson found his heavily-lidded eyes on Amy, who was looking about them with an air of absolute rage, but, even more so, disappointment. And simmering just below, to Carson's ever present horror, disgust.
Fuck it all.
What had he done? What had he been willing to do?
Was he honestly that desperate, that pathetic, that idiotic…
"That human. Carson, you're human, that's fine. We were just shocked. Come on, calm down."
Fingers he'd lost came back to him, and the roaring of self-recrimination in Carson's ears died down just a little.
There. That. That was something in all of this that was…revitalizing, reaffirming. Carson may have been being a fucking moron, but damn if he hadn't felt closer to Jesse in those moments than he'd felt to anyone in probably forever.
Of course, if anything, that surely made him all the more idiotic.
"Carson, I'm sorry, man. I don't know what came over me, I just…"
Even stranger, the violence had felt like even more release of something Carson hadn't even known he'd been holding, and the throbbing in his gut had become a warm sense of catharsis.
Carson didn't know what to think, and the perplexity terrified him. What was he now?
He'd engaged in sex-type activities with heat and enthusiasm, had lost and found himself in things he liked so often to deride as pointless and made purely for the brainless. And then he'd fallen into violence, and had…not enjoyed it. But felt better for it. For so long, Carson had craved, despite his denial of such things, to be at least a little normal, a little human, but he'd made his differences his talisman against the world so that he could survive. And now, when he was maybe not so different in these ways after all, it left him feeling hollowed out and humiliated, and hating himself for the knowledge that he'd do it again in a heartbeat, because there was something there he'd never conceived of before, never had the chance to, and, despite his desperation not to, Carson found himself loving that.
"I am not a kid," he said at last, enunciating the words carefully, blue eyes sweeping up to pierce Andrew through.
His cousin nodded.
"I'm sorry, C-man. I suck. I was just…I don't even know. I acted without thinking. I'll go now."
"I'm sorry, Carson," Amy said softly. "Can I talk to you a minute though? And then we'll get out of your hair I promise. We were only stopping by to say a quick surprise hi anyway, just because we were in the area."
Carson paused, then nodded, because really what was there to lose at this point?
Well, plenty, of course. There was always plenty.
But, if he were honest with himself, he was caught somewhere between resentful and grateful that he and Jesse had been interrupted, anyway. If things had gone any further, he might not have been able to forgive himself whatsoever, and maybe would have had to go throw himself off the nearest bridge.
He could give Amy a minute of his time in private.
Carson went to stand, but found the endeavor difficult, and looked at his and Jesse's hands, still insistently, stubbornly entwined, and a gentle smile took the grimace from his face and knocked it away into nothing.
"Are you going to let go or are you going to start coming with me literally everywhere?"
Jesse smirked at him, the cocky self-contentedness somehow exacerbated with the blossoming redness across the line of his jaw, right beside his ear. A beading of blood clung like a jewel to his lip.
"I really like that last idea. Where are we going next, babe? Cause I'm thinking shower."
Carson laughed, before remembering that he probably wasn't supposed to, but couldn't quite bring on the self-chastisement for that.
"I've got to talk to my cousin now, sweetheart," and, even as much as he was sure it should have, the term of endearment definitely didn't sound like the word idiot right there. "I think it's better we detach before our hands fuse together and they need to call a surgeon. You need your hands to perform don't you?"
"Sexually or…?"
Carson snorted, pulling his hand free more than a little reluctantly.
"You would. Okay, Ames, where to?"
Her brown eyes were soft and glittering.
Andrew's brows were low, his nose wrinkled and unsure.
"I'll be in the car," he informed them slowly, before turning tail and heading down the stairs.
Amy put a hand on Carson's back, which was good for her because much as he adored her he had a sudden aversion to the idea of anyone but Jesse holding his hand right this second, and the pair moved from Carson's room into the hall, then into his grandma's old room from before she'd been moved into the nursing home.
"Carson," she said softly as she closed the door behind them. "Please, first, give me a hug?"
Carson didn't even bother to hesitate in the manner he typically would, obediently wrapping his arms around his cousin, who inhaled quietly as he did.
"You're happy?" It was said as a question, but they both knew it was more of a statement.
Carson nodded against her hair anyway.
"I think I am. I know it's stupid, and you probably-"
"Carson, it's not stupid," Amy said heavily. "Getting mad at yourself for being happy for once, though, is. You're brilliant, Carson, and the king of logic, so use all that brilliance, please, and figure that out already. We love you, and we just care about you and want you safe and happy. That's all. It's simple really."
She looked him in the eyes now, very, very sternly.
"But pace yourself alright? And let yourself relax, just for a bit. You need that."
"I don't think I can do both."
"I think you can do just about anything, except for maybe take care of yourself properly, which is why it's so good we're all around, isn't it?"
Carson laughed a bit.
"Oh is that why? I was wondering why you guys were sticking around… Figured I had something to do with leaving food out. You know what they say… You're not going to cry are you, Ames?"
Amy grinned instead, though her eyes were, in fact, brimming.
"Sorry, girls' time, and I'm feeling even more sentimental than usual because of it. Go back to your boyfriend, and call me later, okay kid?"
"Not a kid," Carson made sure to remind her, and Amy's laugh bounced off the sun-spotted walls.
"No kidding! Fine, I'll see you later, my full-grown-man-cousin."
"See you," Carson said lowly, and she left him in the room.
Moments later, Jesse entered, grinning widely.
"Hey babe."
Carson smiled at him, against his will.
"Hey."
"What'd the cousin want? Details, right? I wouldn't be surprised. The two of us are so freaking hot, we'd make any girl's ovaries explode."
Carson rolled his eyes, going to the small bed still in the room and sinking down to the floor in front of it.
Jesse smirked slightly and swaggered over to the spot as cockily as he could, slipping down to join Carson in his position, automatically mirroring him in gesture, though not quite managing to expression.
After a minute of silence had come and gone, he prodded a finger into his boyfriend's arm.
"Carson, I know you have the ability to think forever, but I'm not really like that, so if you don't start talking I'll be forced to serenade you again. I'm think "Your Song" or "Elephant Love Medley", since I like to think of those as our songs. That and 'First Kiss'… and maybe 'Timberwolves' too. We have a relationship soundtrack already. Oh!"
Carson laughed loudly, and leaned down to lay his head on Jesse's shoulder. Jesse wrapped an arm around him.
"She told me I need to realize that people want me happy. Or some derivative of that. And that I need to let myself relax. Same stuff she's always saying."
"Sounds about right. Are we doing anything tomorrow?"
Carson shot Jesse a look.
"Jesse, school, remember?"
"Not really. I like to pretend it doesn't exist, actually. The only existing things for me are you, sex, and the stage. You know, it might be fun to combine all three. What do you say, babe?"
Carson buried his face in Jesse's shoulder, head shaking back and forth instantly.
"Not happening, sweetheart."
"Ever?"
"While I still have any semblance of sanity."
Jesse grinned and kissed the top of his head, making Carson release a soft groan.
"So, in maybe a month or so is what you're saying."
"I think it's time for us to get back to work," Carson retorted, moving up and attempting to keep his face hidden.
Jesse, though, still caught a flash of reddened skin, and smirked in accomplishment.
They'd be all right.
He stood with Carson and reached out expectantly, smirk softening ever so slightly into a smile when Carson's hand moved as well to meet his, the gesture one of pure nature and instinct. Their fingers wound together, palms kissing.
But there was one more thing.
Jesse stopped them by the door, and Carson turned to him with a frown, face only slightly tinted now.
"You okay?"
Jesse had to smile at that. Carson wasn't usually so open with his concern, maybe not even usually concerned at all in the first place. Clearly, their make-out session had had more than one good effect.
If anything it had to be at around ten.
"Carson, I've been thinking."
Carson's hand pulled free and went to his pocket, shoving deeply in.
"Here we go again," he snarked, and Jesse grinned again, because while he loved open-Carson, and adored the Carson that had writhed with him, feral and wanting, this Carson was the one that had first caught his interest, and, more than the rest, that would stay with him forever.
Jesse leaned against the wall and raised a brow at his boyfriend, who rolled his eyes and sighed.
"What is it, Jesse?"
"You work too hard."
"Really? This again?" Carson asked drolly. "I never took you as the type to only think of the same things over and over, unless it was yourself. Although, of course, Benjamin Franklin did say that the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, and we both know that you could easily define insanity."
Jesse chuckled and pushed off from the wall, looping his arms around Carson, who stood stubbornly still, giving Jesse a dull look.
"Do you have another essay for me to write or something?"
"Actually, that was what I wanted to bring up. Our deal's off. I no longer require your assistance."
Carson's mouth fell open.
"Wait…what?"
Jesse sighed and rolled his eyes dramatically, then turned and strode quickly to the single bed next to the window, falling cat-like to the surface of the comforter and rolling his eyes once more when he realized Carson was still standing by the door, expression incredulous as he stared back at him.
"Well, are you coming?"
Carson scowled.
"I thought we were leaving actually. I need to get back to work remember? And undo all the crap I did for you since I've apparently been fired."
Jesse fell back abruptly, groaning.
"I thought I was the dramatic one of this relationship."
Carson sneered, then sighed.
"You are, Jesse. You're the dramatic one of every relationship."
Jesse grinned.
"I haven't told you about my ex much yet, have I?"
Carson shrugged.
"Let's go back to my room," he suggested, and Jesse moaned.
"You know, sex can happen pretty much anywhere. It's not necessary for us to be in your room, hot as it is."
"Not what I meant," Carson retorted. "My mom should be home soon, and this is my grandma's room from before we had to put her in the nursery home. I don't like being in here, and my mom doesn't like anyone being in here."
Jesse nodded, and stood in one swift movement from the bed.
"Let's go back to your room then."
The pair moved into the hall and then to Carson's room, Jesse smirking again as he caught sight again of the wall of bookshelves on the far side from the door, the only real "decoration", if one could call it that, in virtually the whole of the room, then went and flopped onto the bed, crooking a finger in his boyfriend's direction.
Carson laughed shortly and instead grabbed the limb and pulled Jesse back up.
"No, not involving the bed right now," he informed Jesse. "First, why am I not doing your work anymore? You know I'm fine with it, and we made this deal when we met. I gave you my word. And I happen to like doing it… I know I complain a lot, but getting to do college work is actually really great for me."
Jesse shook his head.
"You're doing someone else's work."
Carson glowered at him.
"Seriously? That's what this is about?"
"Whose is it?"
"I'm not doing this with you, Jesse," Carson replied stubbornly, and Jesse shrugged.
"You're the one who said nothing with the bed right now, and if we're not conducting any bedroom gymnastics to distract me then I've got to get my gold medal at something else, don't I? I'm not as dumb as you think I am, Carson."
"I don't think you're dumb, idiot," Carson muttered irritably.
Jesse smirked fondly at the comment, but said nothing, and Carson sighed.
"Didn't you want to practice performing some song or something?"
"I'll serenade you later," Jesse said seriously, and Carson gave another little choked laugh. "Carson, come on. Whose is it? Why are you doing their work? You think I don't know how these things work, babe? What do they have on you? Did they find out you're an actual human being or something?"
Carson scowled and Jesse traced stars in the alabaster points of the ceiling as he waited, until:
"It's just a little debt I'm working off from getting the fake IDs for the In An Instant shoot. It's not a big deal, Jesse, okay? So you can stop with the melodrama."
Jesse grinned.
"I can totally give them a musical beatdown if you want."
"Right, sorry. I forgot that you're melodrama itself… No musical beat-downs are happening, sweetheart. That's not how it works in real schools."
"Carmel was a real school," Jesse replied instantly, and Carson frowned.
"No, no. Your old school was only real on an existential level. In every other way, it might as well have been built of impenetrable cotton candy that you could also eat and lived at the bottom of the ocean, guarded by the Little Mermaid."
Jesse laughed loudly and kissed him quickly on the lips, before he could be stopped.
"I think some of my drama is rubbing off on you, babe. Either way, my decision's been made. I might still ask you for help sometimes, since you're brilliant and a genius, and I have to focus on my more creative ventures, still, but I'll do most of it myself."
And Carson couldn't exactly fight him on that, either, could he?
It was, after all, exactly what Jesse needed to do.
Instead, their palms kissed once more and, then, with a sound of exasperated release, Carson pressed him hard to the wall and they did, too.
A/N-
SOOOOOOO, long story short, I am so sorry for the wait that everyone's endured. For all my fanfictions actually. I've actually stopped really writing Jarson, because, well, I'm now writing JARON. That is, an entirely original version of this story with my own characters Jared (new Carson) and Cameron (new Jesse), as a television show. It's actually going quite well, and I'm incredibly excited about it, but it has meant that I have to put my all into that.
However, for the sake of the holidays, I completed chapter 11 and, well, to be honest, this one's been completed since nearly the very beginning. But yeah. I hope everyone's enjoyed their holidays. I'll be posting a few of the much-later-in-the-time-line installments of this that I've written (including Jarson's first time and the afterward of In An Instant, which I've also had complete for ages).
I love all of you and am so thankful for the support I've seen for this over so much time. I can only hope that that support can continue going forward.
Happy holidays all!
Love,
Ashley/LunalitSol/Sage