Disclaimer: If I owned One Piece I'd probably be more oriental.

Summary: Sabo was saved by Dragon when the tenryuubito, Saint Jalmack, shot his boat. He, Ace, and Luffy went out to the sea together at age 17/14. What would happen to our beloved Straw Hats if they had a captain who had experienced Grand Line once already?

Warnings: slight OOCness, language, gay jokes, some violence.

Pairings: nothing permanent between main characters, start reviewing if you want something badly (but no LuNa).

I'm seriously considering Sanji/Nami though, and maybe Gin/Robin

A/N: People please tell me if I blunder with Mihawk's name anywhere! Auto correct automatically corrects Mihawk into Mohawk whenever I misspell the name.

Posted: 08.02.12


Previously

"I had a little chat with Sanji and Gin before, and he confessed to have been attacked by a person who could only be Mihawk. Behold, Zoro, that's what you would be capable of if you master busoshoku. Pretty neat, huh?"

Zoro looked at the galleon and gulped. "This is unreal." He whispered.

"Oh, it get's better." Sabo whispered to the swordsman with a sly smirk.

"What do you mean?" Zoro asked the swallowtail coat wearing man.

"You'll see." Both the brothers said together. The slightly maniacal look in their eyes made Zoro a bit nervous.

Suddenly there was a loud noise coming from the galleon, produced by about one hundred men screaming their war cry.

However the enemy pirates did not make it too far as their bigass ship was promptly cut cleanly in half.


"Oh shit!" Luffy screamed suddenly. "Sabo, go make sure Merry won't get sucked into this. I don't trust those bounty hunters to retain cool heads in this situation."

Sabo nodded and ran to Merry, which was tied to the other side of the restaurant.

"What a lucky twist of fate." Sabo mumbled to himself. "If that sissy marine lieutenant hadn't come, Merry might've been docked where it's actually dangerous right now."

"Luffy what's going on?" Zoro asked his captain seriously.

"I think you already know." Luffy replied with a sly grin.

Zoro swallowed heavily and turned an intense gaze towards the wreckage again. "Where?" He whispered. Zoro started sweating nervously. Nami and Usopp shared a confused look. They had yet to realize what exactly happened. They both just theorized that one of their cannons somehow exploded and blew the ship apart. Neither even once considered that a single swordsman could cause this much damage with a single slash.

"Look! Over there!" A random Don Krieg pirate screamed as he noticed a coffin-shaped boat leisurely gliding through the waters. On that boat was a man about 40 years old*. He was wearing a black sleeveless coat and a purple blouse; both unbuttoned, thus showing off his defined abdominal muscles and pectorals. On his head was a fancy hat with a big decorative feather. All that made the man look flamboyantly impressive, but what made the man even more memorable was the ornate oversized sword on his back.

"Wait until he glares at them. They're going to have nightmares for months." Luffy giggled as he watched Krieg's pirates panic, getting some bizarre sadistic amusement from their distress.

"You mean they're not already?" Nami replied dispassionately.

"Oh, yeah. I guess they are." Luffy chuckled sheepishly.

A brave (or foolish) man gathered up his wits and asked Mihawk why he had attacked them again. Mihawk only glanced at him, uninterested.

"I was bored." He replied aloofly.

Apparently the pirate took offence.

"Don't bullshit us!" He screamed and pulled a gun on Mihawk. He pulled the trigger. Nothing seemed to happen, but the blade seemed to magically appear in Mihawk's hand. Truth was he just drew it faster than an average person could see, and used the blade to deviate the twin bullets' path. It resulted in a bunch of very awed but confused pirates.

"What wonderfully subtle and graceful skills…" Zoro whispered, more than impressed. "Every swordsman in the world is right to admire him."

Predictably, for those who knew him, Hawk-Eyes' dramatic scene was ruined by Luffy.

"Miiihaaawk! How's Shanks? I haven't seen him in such a looong time!" He practically sang at the swordsman, drawing the attention of every single person to himself.

Mihawk raised an eyebrow.

"There's a face I didn't expect to see in East Blue… and another I expect to see even less." Mihawk mused aloud, amused, as Sabo reappeared next to his brother.

"Good morning, Mihawk-san. I hope you are well?" Sabo greeted with a polite smile.

"Why yes, thank you, Sabo-kun. Have you and your brothers stayed out of trouble lately?" Mihawk replied with a similar polite smile.

"No, not a snowflake's chance in hell, I'm afraid." Sabo shook his head with a chuckle.

Everyone, except Straw Hats and Zeff (who was only shaking his head in amusement), was stunned into silence. Hawk Eyes, the celebrated most powerful swordsman in the world, was having small talk with unknown brats! What the hell was going on!

Suddenly a proverbial bulb went off above Luffy's head, which most of the time was not a good thing.

"Mihawk, I wanna ask a favor from you." He declared.

Sabo almost facepalmed. He was pretty sure he knew what Luffy was going to ask.

"I can not guarantee my agreement, especially since it's you." Mihawk replied casually. Luffy only grinned, probably not even considering the possibility that he might be refused.

"This is Zoro, my first mate, and a santoryu user." Luffy pointed at Zoro.

Mihawk glanced at the green-haired teen. He was young, of average height, and well muscled, but the only thing that even remotely interested Mihawk was the word 'santoryu'. That was an exceptionally rare style. He heard awed whispers of 'Pirate Hunter Zoro' from Krieg's pirates. Apparently he was rumored to be the strongest swordsman in East Blue; however that didn't mean much to Mihawk, since it really was the weakest and most peaceful of all oceans.

"He aspires to be the greatest swordsman in the world; although he is very far from reaching that goal, believe me." Luffy laughed, oblivious to the disgruntled and annoyed look he received from Zoro. Sabo placed a hand on his shoulder and gave him an embarrassed, apologetic look in an attempt to soothe his irritation. Sadly, Luffy never learned the meaning of tact. Sabo believed it to be a family flaw.

"Would you grant him a spar to show him how far away he still has to go?" Luffy finally voiced his request.

Zoro's annoyance was instantly replaced with surprise. It has been awhile since he had actually sparred with anyone, he wasn't sure he even remembered how to not fight seriously. At least not against a worthy opponent.

"What's your name, boy?" Mihawk asked Zoro. Zoro chose to ignore the 'boy' remark for now.

"Roronoa Zoro."

"What do you think of your captain's idea, Roronoa Zoro?"

Zoro took a moment before answering.

"Whether it is a spar or a showdown, it would be an honor to cross blades with you."

Mihawk pondered for a moment before standing up to his feet.

"I came here to kill time anyway. I don't see why not cross blades with someone who actually knows how to hold a sword." As Mihawk said that he sent a dismayed glance at a few of Krieg's pirates who were hanging on to cheap cutlasses like they were wooden sticks.

In an instant Zoro was standing on the ruined ship's floating wreckage near Mihawk's coffin-shaped boat. He took off his bandana from his arm and tied it over his head. Usually he only would do it in a real duel, but even if it was just a spar Hawk-Eyes would warrant the seriousness. He unsheathed his swords and waited for Mihawk to get ready too. Mihawk moved even faster than Zoro had. One moment he was still leisurely sitting on his boat, the next he was standing beside Zoro.

He took his cross necklace and revealed it to be a small dagger.

"What's that supposed to be?" Zoro asked, a little ticked off.

"Seriously, Mihawk, what the hell?" Luffy screamed on the behalf of Zoro too.

"Show him the difference between us. Isn't that what you asked?" Hawk Eyes replied coolly.

"That is how far apart they are, Luffy." Sabo tried to calm his brother awkwardly.

"Well, yeah, but you don't have to be such an ass about it." Luffy replied with a pout.

Zoro couldn't believe what he was hearing. The captain was pissed because Mihawk was rude, not because he was underestimated? Were these people out of their damn minds, or was he really that weak compared to the summit? Whatever the case, he was majorly pissed off. At what or who, even he didn't know any more.

Their fight began. Zoro attacked head on, however all three of his swords were blocked by the very tip of Mihawk's tiny dagger.

As they continued on the people around them looked on in awe. Except for Luffy and Sabo. Luffy was observing the battle with a carefree grin, but Sabo was feeling a sinister foreboding dread. Something about this 'spar' felt off to him.

Johnny and Yosaku, who had appeared about the same time as the fight began, were cheering Zoro on. They were screaming all the wrong things though (bet you wouldn't like being told not to hold back while you're dishing out all you've got either).

The grin on Luffy's face started fading when Mihawk stabbed Zoro in his chest. It wasn't too deep a cut, but it drew more blood than should be acceptable in a non-lethal spar. Finally Luffy began to feel the same unease his brother.

"Do you want this knife to go through your heart? Why aren't you stepping back?" Mihawk asked.

"Not entirely sure myself." Zoro relied as if he didn't have a knife digging into his flesh. "But if I take a single step back now, it would feel like I had broken my promise, and I would never be able to stand before you again."

"Yes, that's called 'losing'."

Mihawk pulled his dagger away.

"Tell me, why do you aspire to be the best?"

"For my own ambition… and a promise I made to a fallen friend."

Luffy really did not like where this was going. This was far too serious for his liking.

"When did it change?" He asked himself out loud.

"What?" Nami asked what everybody was thinking. What did Luffy mean by 'change'?

"This has been doomed from the start." Sabo replied Luffy, completely ignoring everybody else.

Suddenly Luffy's mouth went dry. Mihawk had drawn his true sword, Kokutou Yoru.

Zoro and Mihawk dished out final attacks on one another.

And after a suspense filled moment…

Zoro's two lesser-quality swords broke and his chest squirted blood. Mihawk was completely unharmed.

Zoro sheathed Wado Ichimonji, stood up, turned around, and spread his arms**.

"What are you doing?" Mihawk asked, showing mild signs of surprise.

"A scar on the back is a shame of a swordsman."

Mihawk smirked.

"Well said."

Mihawk would have landed a near-fatal blow to Zoro's chest if it weren't for the fact that the blade of his sword was suddenly stuck between Luffy's palms. He only had a moment to register the lad's pissed off look before a powerful kick was aimed in his way. The kick had enough force to destroy another good portion of Krieg's already mixer-ed ship.

Mihawk landed some distance away, looking a little windswept but otherwise not affected. Kokutou Yoru was still in his hand.

"What the bloody ghost-fucking hell do you think you're trying to pull here?" Luffy screamed, nearly frothing with fury. "You agreed to a freakin' spar! When the hell did you turn it into an actual duel?"

Zoro, who had been angry just a moment ago for the interruption, smartly decided to quell his anger and keep his mouth shut.

Mihawk actually looked sheepish, or as sheepish as he could.

"My apologies, Monkey. It's easy to forget when fighting against someone who has such a strong will. To prefer death over defeat is not something everyone could be capable of."

Mihawk took a few steps closer. When he stopped he raised his sword and pointed the tip towards Zoro.

"Don't rush your death, kid. Go to the Real World, become stronger. No matter how long it would take I will await you in my strongest form! Surpass this sword! Surpass me! Roronoa Zoro!" He declared loudly.

Sabo wasn't sure whether to grin or facepalm, but Luffy seemed to be very pleased with the acknowledgment Mihawk gave to Zoro. That was all nice and all, but did he really have to be such a drama queen about it?

Zoro unsheathed Wado Ichimonji and pointed the tip towards the other swordsman.

"If I don't become the greatest swordsman my captain would be in a real dilemma. So, as of right now, for as long as I shall live, I will not lose to anyone ever again! Until the day I can defeat you, I will never lose to anyone! Any problems with that, Pirate King?"

During the entire vow Zoro's eyes were trained on Mihawk, but the last part was directed at Luffy.

"None, whatsoever." Luffy replied with a shit-eating grin.

Zoro and Mihawk sheathed their weapons.

"You make a fine team. I hope to meet you again some day." With that Mihawk went to leave.

"Wait!" Came the shout of both Luffy and Krieg.

Mihawk stopped and glanced over his shoulder.

"Didn't you come for my head?"

"Aren't you going to have a drink with us?"

Krieg and Luffy asked at the same time. The reaction was mixed. Some of Krieg's pirates nearly pissed themselves in fear as their captain prevented the swordsman from leaving; others gaped at Straw Hat lad for asking Hawk-Eyes to do something as humane as having a drink.

"A drink sounds nice. I think I've had enough fun for one day." Mihawk replied to Luffy, completely ignoring Krieg.

"BEFORE YOU GO, DIE!" Krieg screamed and opened fire against Mihawk.

Mihawk only rolled his eyes at the man's stupidity and swung his sword almost lazily to kick up some wood and water. The distraction was enough for Mihawk to slip away unnoticed. What most didn't realize was that Mihawk did not actually leave.

Luffy took advantage of the ruckus Krieg and Mihawk created as well, and helped Zoro back to Baratie where Sabo wasted no time to patch him up.

Usopp thought that he should get a big-ass hat too so he could hide some stuff there. After all, a bag is an obvious place to hide weapons and medicine, and would get confiscated immediately if they were ever apprehended. A hat would be less suspicious, and maybe in boots too…?


"Those parasites." Sanji mumbled distastefully as Krieg shot one of his men for speaking what everyone else from his crew was thinking.

"I think he's so pathetic it's funny." Luffy giggled.

Sanji almost jumped in startle. He hadn't noticed when the young Straw Hats Captain had snuck up to him. A glance sideways showed Zoro was still being bandaged by Sabo and Nami. He tsked in jealousy, momentarily daydreaming being cared by the ginger navigator himself. Luffy's cackling brought him back to reality.

"Is that so? What's funny about him?" Sanji asked Luffy, only mildly curious.

"He thinks the only reason Mihawk is so strong is because he has a Devil Fruit ability. Hehe, and Zeff's logbook includes the information about a strategy how to deal with people like that." Luffy stopped explaining for a moment in favor of laughing. "It's true that there's some very good ways to counter Devil Fruit users, but Mihawk isn't a Devil Fruit user. He's just that strong in his own right. Poor sucker."

Sanji shrugged.

"Well, anyway it looks like they're about to attack. Hey, go to the control room and open the fin." Sanji told a random chef, who looked surprised by the order.

"Are you serious? We'll give them a place to fight that way." He protested.

"So what? If we let the interior of the restaurant get damaged the old man will never let us hear the end if it."

The other chef apparently agreed because he disappeared.

"Speaking of the old man… where is he anyway?" Sanji wondered.

There was a battle cry, the enemy made a mad dash towards the restaurant.

"This is a pain." Sabo said, his voice betraying boredom. "How should we go about this situation?"

While he was contemplating the best way to fight the pirates to alleviate his boredom Usopp had already started his counterattack. He had hidden behind Baratie's ruined door while sniping off as many people as quickly as he was capable.

Sabo whistled in appreciation.

"Y'know, he's pretty fast with that thing." He said with a grin.

"Nice. But he's still not fast enough yet." Luffy nodded with a grin.

Sadly he was right. The distance between him and enemies was too small, and Usopp would likely be killed before he could snipe off every Krieg Pirate. Fortunately for Usopp, he had a very strong captain. Luffy launched himself off into the air and rained a parade of fists at his opposers.

Everyone's mouths fell open in shock. Well, they didn't know Luffy had a Devil Fruit ability and seeing his fists stretch and multiply was enough to warrant a heart attack on a lesser man.

Luffy landed back at Baratie, smoothly, after he was done pummeling Krieg's henchmen.

"You brat, you have a Devil Fruit ability, don't you?" Don Krieg declared loudly and confidently.

"Yups, I'm a rubber-human." Luffy replied as he stretched his face to add emphasis.

Suddenly a platform floated up from the sea and stuck to the boat. So, that's the 'fin', huh?

"Whoa! That's so awesome!" Luffy exclaimed with stars in his eyes.

Sanji, ignoring the distracted pirate captain, stepped on the (surprisingly not slippery at all) platform and declared. "Why not fight to your hearts content now, you pirates? This is your opportunity."

Krieg liked the idea of fighting without damaging the ship very much.

Suddenly they were all distracted when the restaurant's fish 'figurehead' dislocated from the main ship. It turned out the figurehead was a miniature warship. Unfortunately, it wasn't very effective as Krieg only 'threw' it away once it was close enough. It did get a few good shots at his goons beforehand though.

Don Krieg, as a demonstration how smart he was, threw the warboat right at Baratie. The very same ship he wanted to himself and unharmed. Cue sweatdrops.

Thankfully the day was saved by Sanji who kicked it away from its course so it landed into the 'fin' harmlessly. Apparently cooking wasn't the only skill Zeff taught Sanji.

Patty and Carne, who had steered the ship, weren't all that grateful though.

From then on there was an all-out brawl between chefs and pirates, with chefs losing, but only until Patty and Carne joined in, then it was the pirates who were getting their asses handed to them. The tides were turned again when Patty and Carne were taken out immediately by a weird, weird guy. Although nobody could tell he was such a weirdo yet because he was hidden in the water. It was only until he climbed to the fin his true nature was revealed.

As Patty and Carne were lying on the floor, defeated, the weirdo started talking.

"What are you guys doing?" He spoke with a noticeable lisp.

"Who's that dude?" Luffy asked out loud.

Well, he certainly looked like a weirdo. He was wearing a pinkish 'pearl' helmet; metal shields on front and back of his body that also had pinkish pearls in the middle; similar shields, just smaller, guarding both elbows and knees; and the same shields were also in his hands. But the real weirdness came out when he answered Luffy's question.

"I am Mister Pearl. Invincible Iron-Wall Pearl." He simpered with a laugh, "Commander of Krieg Pirates second unit. I've won my last 61 battles completely unharmed. I have never been injured in battle; I've never shed even a drop of blood. I'm so beautiful, I love myself."

"Can I kill him?" Luffy asked Sabo like a child would ask a parent for sweets.

"Ask again when my brain's come home." Sabo replied with a vacant look. "And I thought I've seen everything."

"What would happen if you'd make him bleed during battle?" Luffy thought out loud.

"That's… a good question. Let's find out."

Sabo grabbed his staff and smacked Pearl in the face. He didn't hit very strong though, just strong enough to give him a nosebleed. Pearl completely flipped out and set himself on fire… literally.

Sabo masterfully evaded the flame, but the tip of his coat tail got a little singed. He tsked and took off his jacked, more annoyed at himself for allowing his clothes to get scorched than the actual fact that it got scorched. It was a pretty rookie mistake.

"Whoa. He's practically spitting fire. The restaurant will be ruined at this rate." Luffy commented calmly as the fin caught fire completely.

"You got time to make such comments, how about you think of a way to kill this fire?" Sanji grumbled angrily as he kicked Pearl in attempt to take the freaky thing out.

"Hmm…" Luffy said thoughtfully while scratching his chin.

"Oh crap." Sabo mumbled.

When Luffy made that face he more often than not comes up with the most bizarre plans. They're usually quite effective, despite their odd nature, but sometimes they're actually counterproductive.

"How about this?" Luffy asked as he kicked his foot 30ft in the air and brought it down with massive force, shattering the fin to pieces. Well, it did manage to douse the fire at least.

"What the fuck, Straw Hat! Are you trying to destroy this place?" Sanji screamed.

"No. Just the fire." Luffy replied simply.

"YOU DESTROYED A PART OF THE SHIP!" Sanji raged.

"Oh, I see." Luffy claimed with a mildly surprised look.

Sanji gave up.

Suddenly a roar resonated through the air and Pearl flew out, determined to pound Luffy into the ground. Luffy didn't react the least bit to the danger, but considering Pearl's face was kicked in by Sanji a moment later, he had no need to.

"That's enough!"

Their attention was grabbed by Gin, who had somehow taken Nami as hostage. Usopp was lying behind them, unconscious with a big lump on his head.

"For real?" Sabo sighed. "Are you honestly already desperate enough to try and take hostages?"

"Desperate!" Krieg guffawed from where he was standing. "It doesn't matter what you do. Honor? Sympathy? They're for the weak. All that matters is that you win. How you obtain victory doesn't matter as long as you won't lose in the end."

"That sounds… really boring." Luffy commented.

"How the hell can you be so fucking calm? Gin's got your beautiful navigator as hostage!" Sanji raged at the seemingly unconcerned captain.

"Gin should worry more about his own life." Luffy said nonchalantly.

And he was right. Not a moment later Gin grunted and made a mad leap to avoid the sword slash courtesy of Zoro. Said swordsman looked highly disgruntled.

"You should've speared him!" A random chef shouted at Zoro.

And Zoro could have if he had wanted to, since he had been standing behind Gin. However Zoro really didn't like attacking people from behind, no matter the situation. So he actually first got Gin's attention, then attacked from the side. If Gin didn't have such fast reflexes he would've gotten impaled. Using Nami as shield hadn't been an option from that angle.

"Gin, you useless piece of trash! You should've let him impale you, imbecile!" Krieg raged.

Gin hung his head in shame.

"Hey! Gin's your officer, isn't he? You're supposed to be the one protecting him, not demanding his life on a whim!" Luffy raged at Krieg. Gin looked like a kicked puppy to him.

"His life is insignificant compared to my ambition!" Krieg declared self-importantly.

"You devil-cursed, feces covered, dickmuffin! You're the captain, YOU'RE supposed to be the one protecting your nakama, not BLOODY ABUSE THEM!" Luffy raged, stomping his feet.

"Hah! That's the difference between us, boy. Feelings of caring are for the weak. And only the strong can get to the top." Krieg declared self importantly.

While Luffy and Krieg were screaming their different opinions, Sabo went next to Gin.

"Your loyalties are truly admirable, but completely wasted on a man such as Krieg." He said quietly.

"Krieg is my captain. He's truly strong." Gin sobbed.

Sabo shook his head. "You haven't seen strong. Your captain is, for the lack of better term, pathetic. You're like a dog, Gin. And Krieg is like an abusive master. A dog's nature is to be loyal, but it yearns for a nice master. Sadly because the dog doesn't know anything else but his master's cruelty, he can never be free. Look around a bit, and find a captain who will appreciate you the way you should be."

With that Sabo stepped away from Gin towards his younger brother. In doing so he exposed his bare back and tattoo to Gin, who fell over in shock. His gaping was noticed by Krieg and his crew.

"Gin-san, what's the matter with you?" A random Krieg pirate asked.

At first Gin couldn't find his words, instead he choked on his tongue and pointed a shaking finger at Sabo.

"I know that mark!" He shouted as he finally regained control over his voicebox. "That's the mark of the current most powerful pirate, the only other pirate who gave Pirate King Gold Roger any competition! Whitebeard!" He declared.

Complete silence reigned for a moment, before whispers broke up everywhere. The pirates tried to peer at Sabo to get a glimpse at the mark, who only smiled in amusement and turned around to proudly display the mark for everyone to see.

Krieg had to demonstrate his brilliance again.

"Haahaahaahaa! This is perfect! Killing a few of Whitebeard's underlings is sure to bet me more infamy." He guffawed.

"That's also a sure way to get yourself murdered." Sabo replied with a smile. "Pops is highly protective of all his kids. Whitebeard Pirates are likely the most sanctioned, as they're sure to be avenged should they be harmed."

"Are you trying to intimidate me into sparing you?" Krieg snorted.

The brothers burst out laughing.

"No, intimidating people out of a fight is not our style." Sabo said through chuckled. "But even if it were, we would have no need to with a weakling like you." Luffy finished.

A vein on Krieg's temple pulsed angrily. "Are you brats mocking me?" He demanded.

"Yes." The brothers replied without missing a beat, completely straight faced.

Krieg whipped out a weapon.

"Let's see you laugh, when you're poisoned." He snarled.

Whispers of 'MH5' was spread throughout the enemy pirates.

"Don Krieg, you can't be serious!" Gin shouted.

"I'm very serious! Though, I usually wouldn't waste it on a pair of brats such as yourselves, but rather on a small village, or a warship. You ought to feel honored. Enjoy!"

"Y'know, Lu, you do usually laugh when you're poisoned." Sabo whispered to his brother.

"I thought it annoyed him." Zoro, who made a surprise appearance, piqued in.

"If he notices he's being poisoned he's annoyed, if not then most of the time it puts him in a good mood."

"Really?" Zoro asked with a raised eyebrow.

Just then Krieg launched off the weapon, and immediately Luffy and Sabo realized something wasn't quite right about the projectile. Luffy grabbed onto Zoro and immediately jumped back alongside Sabo. Good thing too, as a barrage of shurikens exploded out of the projectile a moment later.

"Didn't he say he was going to use poison?" Luffy wondered, confused.

"He was bluffing, Lu." Sabo explained patiently.

"Oh, so that's what he did!" Luffy exclaimed while hitting his fist to his palm.

"How's Usopp?" Luffy asked Nami who had been tending to the unconscious sharpshooter.

"He'll be fine." Nami replied.

Then their attention was caught by a loud bang. The noise was created by Gin shattering Pearl's Iron Wall with his tonfa. From then on there was an all out duel between Sanji and Gin. It was damn hard to watch, what with the brutal moves they pulled on one another. At one point Gin had Sanji pinned, but just as it seemed like he was the winner he got a burning cigarette spat into his face, dangerously close to his eyes, momentarily turning the tables. Then at one time Sanji pulled a completely unnatural looking move the looked like it should've shattered Gin's spine, if it hadn't been for the blocking tonfa, which then on out had a slight indention.

Finally Sanji managed to crack their stalemate by somehow disarming Gin and having him pinned in a way that would've given a very wrong impression to an outsider. By Gin's blush he realized it too. Sanji was blissfully oblivious.

The surrounding Krieg Pirates were gaping with their mouths open, flabbergasted that their battle commander lost. Krieg didn't take it well either.

The arrogant pirate captain pulled out another weapon.

"I'll show you, you little brats, why Krieg Pirates are the most powerful in East Blue." He growled.

"You have the most people. Doesn't mean you're really strong." Luffy deadpanned.

"I'll show you the power that conquered East Blue!" Krieg screamed and waved his weapon around like a lunatic.

"That's MH5, but for real this time!" The pirates claimed and took out their gas masks.

Gin took out his as well.

"Throw that mask away." Krieg screamed at Gin. "I have no need for weaklings. You aren't one of mine anymore. Drop dead."

Gin looked like all life's meaning was suddenly stripped from him.

"What a despicable coward you are." Sabo tutted.

"Don't say that!" Gin protested, but rather weakly. "Don Krieg is the strongest man in the world. There's no way for you to beat him."

"Gin, remember what I told you just a moment ago." Sabo shook his head sadly at the recently abandoned Krieg Pirates Battle Commander.

Just then "MH5!" Krieg screamed and unleashed the true poison gas projectile.

However as it turned out the gas masks weren't even necessary, because just as soon as the gas exploded it was all sucked into Luffy. Said rubber boy looked like a bloated balloon by the time he had inhaled the last of the poison. He cupped his hands over mouth to prevent any poison from escaping while looking like he was having minor spasms.

Krieg let out a loud guffaw.

"What a fool! All that talk about true strength and caring for your nakama! Now look where that got you!" He laughed uproariously.

"Sabo, is everything alright?" Zoro asked the older male, who suddenly looked really nervous. "I mean, he'll be fine since he's immune to poison, right?"

"I'm not worried about Luffy right now. I'm more concerned about us." Sabo confessed. "Moderate amount of poison doesn't do anything to my kid brother, but if it's in abundance… Well, it does have affects."

"What kind of affects?" Zoro asked, suddenly feeling a foreboding dread.

"There hasn't been very many occasions when Luffy ingested a lot of poison, but the times he did… I just hope he only gets really sleepy. The last time he went into all out rage that lasted for four days straight. We had to shackle him up with a lot of kairoseki."

Just then Luffy final spasm imploded his body back to its normal size. Luffy let out a loud belch and a small cloud of mauve poison gas exited his mouth and withered into nothing. For a moment nothing happened. Then Luffy started shaking all over his body. The shivers got worse and worse until finally he let out a loud shout and started doing laps around Baratie in an enormous speed.

"Oh great, it has the same effect as coffee." Sabo groaned miserably and palmed his face.

"Luffy." He tried to get his brother's attention.

Luffy continued his laps.

"Luffy!"

No effect.

"LUFFY!"

Nada

"MONKEY D. LUFFY! PAY ME SOME GODDAMN ATTENTION!"

Nothing.

"Meat!"

Skiddle. Skiddle. Stop.

"Meat?"

Zoro snorted at the absurdity of the situation.

"Lu, I know you're really full of energy, but how about you take it out on him instead of the restaurant?" Sabo suggested while pointing towards Krieg.

Luffy blinked stupidly for a moment and then started quivering all over and a maniacal grin broke on his lips. With a sudden shout he took straight across water towards the older pirate. Krieg had no time to react before he got a chestful of rapidly pounding fists. And when I say rapidly I don't mean the usual multiplied-looking rain of punches, but so fast there was visibly nothing there but skin-colored mist.

A moment later his armor completely shattered, but the little unassuming-looking-but-really-monstrously-strong runt did not stop his punches. So now Krieg enjoyed a thorough intestine rearranging massage.

After Krieg was pulverized to the point he would definitely have to retire from piracy (but not yet into wooden shirt***) Luffy leaped around like a demented frog before stopping and trying to whack random pirates from where he was standing. Because the pirates were in water and Luffy on remaining ship rubble, the game turned into a gomu-gomu variation of whack-a-mole. After Luffy had gotten bored with that as well he returned to Baratie and proceeded to sprint laps around the restaurant.

Back with the cooks and Straw Hats, another surprise was imminent.

"Things like that always seem to happen around that youngling." A random voice said above them.

Everyone looked up and most people's jaws dropped.

Hawk-Eyes and Owner Zeff, sitting on the balcony, sipping wine, and enjoying the view.

"Owner! Since when…?" A random chef sputtered.

"It's not every day a restaurant is visited by a Shichibukai. Just common courtesy to at least offer a drink, isn't it?" Zeff snorted.

"Oh, what are you drinking?" Sabo, one of the few not at all surprised, climbed to the balcony to have a better look.

"A vintage from North Blue, Woehoo Kingdom. It has a very unique taste, quite exquisite." Mihawk replied and poured Sabo a glass.

Thunk. Snore.

Luffy had suddenly collapsed and started snoring loudly.

"Oh good, I was afraid he might start a fire with his running." Zeff commented.


When Luffy woke up it took him a moment before he panicked loudly and scream for his hat. Suddenly it was deposited on his head. Luffy looked up to see his smiling brother.

"Ah. Morning Sabo."

"Hello Lu. Did you have a nice sleep?"

"Ara? Where did everybody go?" Luffy asked, confused.

"They left after you pounded Don Krieg's to the ground."

"Captain! You're finally awake." Nami entered to room.

"Hey, Nami-chan. You look happy."

The ginger navigator grinned like a cat that got the canary.

"Krieg had quite a bit of loot in that ruined ship of his. Although getting it all was a bit difficult."

"Speak for yourself." Zoro grumbled as he entered the room as well. "You forced me and that pervy love-cook to dive multiple times until we had salvaged all that we could and more. You didn't lift a fucking finger."

"Stop complaining, it was for the greater good." Nami snipped.

"Greater good for whom?" The swordsman growled.

"Aaah~! For the dearest goddess, I would dive to the bottom of the deepest ocean if only she commanded. Over and over again, and bring about the purest of pearls. I would-" The fair haired chef entered as well, singing praises to Nami.

"Yes, yes, thank you." Nami waved his appreciation away, but the man only looked happier.

"A-ah! Luffy's awake?" Usopp tried to enter the room as well, but since so many people were blocking the doorway he only ended up making everybody collapse into a heap.

"Usopp!" Nami suddenly seemed to transform into a she-demon and the sharpshooter gulped nervously.

"Get the hell off me, you love-cook." Zoro growled when heart-eyed Sanji made no move to get up (his head was pretty close to Nami's bust).

"Uh, am I interrupting something?" A timid voice asked from the doorframe.

The sight was an odd one Gin had just walked in on. The Straw Hat lad was sitting on the bed, his older brother standing next to him, and the rest of the crew plus Sanji all in a bundle on the floor.

"Hey, Gin! I thought all Krieg's men had left." Luffy greeted, genuinely happy to see the older man.

"Oh, uh, I didn't go with them." Gin said, looking a little nervous. "Since Don Krieg pretty much fired me I'm not sure I'd be welcome again with him. And after what you did to him I'm not even sure he can continue as a pirate. No future there…" The last part was mumbled.

"Okay. So whacha gonna do now?"

"Uhh, I'm not sure. Find another pirate crew to join, probably."

"Cool. You can become my nakama!" Luffy exclaimed happily.

Gin blushed sheepishly, not-so-secretly hoping the kid would say that, and bowed his head deeply.

"Thank you for this opportunity. I promise I will not let you down."

"Awesome, I got two new crew members!" Luffy grinned.

"Oi, why are you counting me?"

Luffy gave Sanji the Puppy Eyes of Doom.

"No." Sanji said and turned his head so he wouldn't be persuaded by the über adorableness.


A ringing sounded throughout the ship, signaling a mealtime. Sanji led the group to the dining room where all the chefs were already pigging out.

An incident that started with Patty insulting Sanji's cooking chased the blonde chef out of the hall. Then on the other chefs explained to the Straw Hats that they only insulted his cooking and were generally being mean to Sanji on purpose to make him feel unwelcome and encourage him to finally leave the restaurant to chase after his own dream. Unknown to everybody (except the brothers as they were skilled at kenbunshoku) Sanji heard the entire conversation as he was standing right behind the door.

Incidentally that also convinced him to go and find All Blue.

And that is how the Straw Hats Pirates got their amorous chef.


The group had set sail from Baratie and just as night fell the booze was broken out.

"Now, our dear newest comrades." Started Usopp, as Gin and Sanji sat next to one another with confused looks. "We will now commence with christening you as our nakama. Let the ritual begin!" He exclaimed.

"Ritual?" Both men echoed.

Bang

Nami hit a bottle of booze on the table.

"You two are going to have a drinking competition with our captain." She declared.

"I'm in!" Gin grinned, in no need for more prompting.

"I don't know, I don't usually drink too excessively." Sanji hesitated.

"Chicken?" Zoro mocked.

"Fuck no! I'll drink all you losers under the table if I have to!" The chef replied hotly.

"Good. First round!" Nami began the semi-friendly competition.

Fist mugs went smoothly.

Seconds went a little happier.

Thirds went with songs.

Fourths went with more singing.

Fifths went with occasional hiccupping.

Sixths went… already too happily.

Sevenths… let's take a closer look. Otherwise you wouldn't believe me.

Gin and Sanji had their arms around each others shoulders while singing uproariously. Suddenly, without paying too much attention what he was doing exactly, Gin smacked a kiss on Sanji's cheek. Sanji, not one to be indebted, returned one of his own. Suddenly they both turned their heads and touched lips in an innocent enough way. At least it started out innocent enough, but then it started to get longer and longer, with a little bit more tongue the longer it went on. Finally it lost all innocence and the pair of men fell off their perch, hands everywhere all over each other and lips permanently locked.

The rest of the crew were too busy gripping their sides laughing and trying to keep a lid on their bladders to even attempt to separate the pair, who were no doubt going to be completely mortified the next morning when sober.

Sabo produced a camera and took a nice bunch of pictures for blackmail.

"This is just too rich." Zoro chortled.

"Guys, I think we at least should have the courtesy to make sure they don't find any place too private. Who knows what might happen?" Sabo suggested, sending the rest into another bout of laughter.

"I hope they remember this in the morning." Usopp said once he had caught his breath.

"Kanpai!" Luffy cheered.


Thanks for reading.

Shortest chapter I've done for this story and took long as hell… Sorry?

*Mihawk was 41 at that moment.

** I actually accidentally wrote 'legs' instead of 'arm'. It took me a moment before my blunder registered. Then I giggled giddily like a 12 year old. Honestly, MiZo hadn't even really occurred to me before that XD

***Wooden shirt means coffin.

Question: what's the difference between 'affect' and 'effect'? I've tried dictionaries, but it's still foggy to me.

Word count: 6693