The final chapter in this twisted tale.

As he is being cleared to depart the senate after the assassination of the Chancellor halted all incoming or outgoing space traffic Rodger 8 gets a coded communication from the club he knows what to do as he pokes his head out of the ship. "Excuse me s-s-sirs! You might want to look at this."

Jar Jar sits back in the emergency meeting as they debate the pompous delegates proposal to make him Chancellor. He doesn't need to mind control them all into voting for them just enough of those that haven't been convinced by the smooth talker to ensure a majority vote in his favor.

"Uh-ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" The droid smacks himself in the head. "...oh. We have company sir."

Vader looks out the back to see trooper transport ships gathering all around them.

The radio crackles to life. "We know you're in there Vader land now or you will be shot down."

"Would you like me to take evasive action sir?"

"By all means. I will handle them."

The delivery Rodger zigs the ship into an asteroid field and zags around them crazily at break neck speed.

Vader gets bumped around and tumbled all around the back before he can attempt to use his Sith powers on the pursuers. "What are you doing?!"

"Taking evasive actttttttttttttttttttttttttt ttttttt..." As he smacks himself in the head this time it turns around backward again. "...action sir."

"Stop it before you get us killed in here."

"I'm sorry sir you didn't say the magic word."

"Magic word?" Vader attempts to use his Sith powers to incapacitate the Rodger only to realize when nothing happens that Sideous wasn't the only one who used him.

The driod opens the radio channel. "Sirs I have Vader here would you like me to put him out of your misery for you?" Rather than waiting for a reply he corkscrews into the asteroid ejecting himself from the cockpit just before impact-which isn't noticed in the resulting explosion.

After the senate vote Jar Jar stands up before them all. "Fellow senators...it is with a humble heart that Meesa accepts your overwhelming vote to make Messa Chancellor."

At the club the cookie tender looks up as the holo-feed spits out another news report. "Sources close to the investigation report that Vader has just been killed in a high speed chase with trooper through an asteroid field."

"Excellent."

As Rodger 8 pilots the super speedy delivery ship back to the club he is unaware that a hitchhiker floating in space grabs hold of the hull as he passes the asteroid field where Vader was killed.

Very late that night Jar Jar finally returns to the club. He pays the speedy cab driver to wait for him because he doesn't intend to stay long. When he goes inside the droids are still celebrating the death of Sideous.

"What took you so long?"

Jar Jar looks down at the new Sith Lady. "Had to vote on a new Chancellor."

"Good riddance to the old one. Too bad about Vader though I liked him. We lost the delivery Rodger too."

"Good riddance to that crazy thing." He looks around at all the droids sporting 'Vader was framed' T-shirts and drinking milkshakes out of goblets that look like a big headed mini version of Vader. "Where'd they get all that stuff?"

"Made it down stairs. They work fast."

"Join the party sirs!"

Lady Lunous turns to the Rodger. "In a minute we have some business to attend to." She turns to Jar Jar. "As promised Jar Jar, I dub thee Darth Goofenhimer."

"Woo hoo! Weesa the big time Sith Lords now. Sorry Lady and Lord. So what now Darth..."

"Lunous."

"Good name."

"For now we lay low. We don't want the Jedi out there finding out who we are."

"That would be bad. For now we can party though." He runs out to the droids. "Stomp dance!"

Lady Lunous smacks herself in the forehead.

Outside the hitchhiker hides in the shadows as Rodger 8 goes inside. He jumps off the super speedy delivery ship and makes his way to the waiting speedy cab.

The driver looks back as the door opens. "I got orders to wait. Besides we don't serve your-" The driver is cut off as he is dragged out of the ship by his throat.

The techno mix of the "Dayo song blares in the club as Jar Jar and several of the Rodgers stomp in rows first the front row jumping with feet spread out then the back row with feet spread out jump and pulls theirs together. It goes on back and forth for most of the song before Jar Jar gets a little too enthusiastic gets out of rhythm and crashes into several Rodgers which causes a chain reaction knocking them all down. They all pick themselves up laughing over it though.

As the song ends Jar Jar starts a chant encouraging the new Sith Lady to get up onstage and sing. One by one the Rodgers pick it up until the entire club is buzzing.

While the Rodgers get her up onstage Jar Jar goes back into the kitchen to mix up a special Gungan celebration milkshakes. In one glass he uses the sugar the supposedly secret crystals are hidden in-which he knows has been tainted by them. He leaves that glass alone as he passes the rest out to the Rodgers. When she comes off stage he waits at a table in the back and pushes the glass to her as she sits down.

"That stuff has enough sugar in it to make a person bounce off the walls for days."

"Its power good though. Just like Meesa Mom used to make it."

Sith Lady Lunous downs most of it in one gulp. She looks up as one of the Rodgers comes over. "Sirs there is a speedy cab ship outside." She looks over at Jar Jar. "You expecting company?"

"Nope. Meesa can't stay. Lots to do back at the Senate." He pauses for dramatic effect. "They voted me Chancellor."

"Why would you do that?"

"What makes you think Meesa made them do it?"

"Its what any Sith Lord with a chance to take over would do."

He shrugs as he gets up and starts to walk away. He stops after a few steps looking back at her with one of his lovable looks. "Meesa used all the sugar in the kitchen. Yousa need to get the Rodgers to bring up some from storage for tomarrow."

Her Sith apprentice is out the door before Lady Lunous realizes what he really meant by that comment. By then its too late and she slumps over the table.

As the ship takes off Jar Jar gets a call from the Rodgers.

"Darth Goofenhimer here."

"Sir we just found Darth Lunous dead."

"Messa noticed the Hut put had an order for recipe 24 on the board. Throw her on the compost heap."

"Rodger sir."

Jar Jar kicks back in the seat. "Chancellor and Sith Lord in one day. Meesa gonna do what kooky old Sideous only dreamed of." He pushes a button lowering the privacy shield between him and the driver. "Take it slow. Messa in no hurry tonight." He screams as the delivery Rodger turns its head around to face him. He screams even louder as the dead driver falls out of an overhead compartment during a sharp turn.

"Sorry sir no can do. You're in a speedy cab shippppppppppppppppppppp..." It smacks itself in the head as it veers into the asteroid field. "...ship. Thank you for choosing us for your transportation needs and have a nice afterlife."

Jar Jar continues to scream as the crazy Rodger crashes the ship into a nearby asteroid.

in the end lady lunous grossly underestimated her apprentice. that wasn't my intended ending but to cut it short and keep it zany i liked the serial killer aspect the short circuiting delivery Rodger started to show. the stomp dance sequence is based on a dream i had after Sig Hansen started singing 'Dayo' on a Deadliest Catch episode and got that song stuck in my head then i watched a video of Hanson recording stomps as percussion for their album and somehow it all got mixed up with a dream where all 3 of band guys and the ship captain did a stomp dance to a techno mix of 'Dayo' and for some reason Jar Jar was ended up trying to join in and wreaked havoc. i couldn't resist throwing it into the final chapter.

i didn't invent the shirts or the cups mentioned in the story those are real Star Wars novelty items as well as jar jar's shirts mentioned in an earlier chapter and the slogan on the baker's apron.

that isn't the end for the fantasy club sith though-just this crazy story. in the fantasy version both lady lunous and lord goofenhimer are alive and well and the club is frequented by the greats of cartoons past and present-as voted on by Sith Lady-Sith Lord and all the minions who okay membership applications. to visit all it takes it an overactive imagination and knowledge of our floor plan and services available-an the offer of a cookie from a shady looking character. in the case of this story we will also let cookie recipe requests be valid-just tell our bouncers Black Blaze and Tigertron that Darth Lunous invited you-although a cookie recipe request as proof couldn't hurt ;)

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