What? A Christmas!fic in August? /intense giggle of creepy-ness

Yes. But this is what happens when Christmas songs are constantly stuck in my head.

Also, because I'm lazy, the Vargas brothers live in America and celebrate the American way. I just don't have the mentality at three in the morning to bother with the Italian version (there has to be a difference!).

ACHTUNG: For some reason when I write Lovino, I over use the italicize button. Seriously.

When Santa comes to town

He gets a hug and a pound from me

Can you steer your slay alright?

I'm sure you're good to fly tonight

'Cause I would get shit next year

If you die

~Breathe Carolina, Mile High Christmas

I awoke to the sound of bells tinkling just above me. Upon bothering to open my eyes, I find Feliciano hanging christmas decorations all over my walls. I groaned, pulled the blankets up over my head and went back to sleep, hoping Feli wouldn't realize I was not asleep.

"Ve? Lovi! You're awake!" Fuck. Me. "Now you can help put up the decorations~! Ve~" No, that was not a request, it was a command.

"Alright, in about an hour." I buried my face in my pillow, secretly trying to kill myself. I felt and heard a string of bells fall and land by my ear, damn those were loud.

"Wh-what?"

…

I could hear the eye twitch in his voice.

"Y'know, I changed my mind, I think I'll help now." I picked up the bells, handed them to my psychopath brother. He was scary at christmas, mainly because he obsesses over the fact that "We can eat as a family, Lovi! A family! Eheheh... heheh~ Ve~" and then you would be mauled by "~"s. Not a pretty thing.

So, wanting to stay alive long enough to at least take a siesta, I decided I would start with the living room. The tree was already there (big surprise) so I was left to decorate it. But then, my worst enemy came prancing in like she owned the fucking place.

"Mreeeow~?" Mrs. Kitty (totally Feliciano right there, folks) looked up at the tree with wide scheming eyes. I could already tell she was planning the demise of thousands of ornaments. Then she turned towards me and tilted her head in a fashion that she probably deemed cute.

…

Okay, it was cute. Kind of like Antonio's "Herp derp, I don't get it." face. But I digress.

Mrs. Kitty decided I wasn't interesting anymore but that the tinsel sitting beside the tree was.

Oh hell naw!

I launched myself at the fluff ball, scooped her up and began to scratch her head to distract her. As she purred, blissfully unaware of the approaching closet. I quickly opened said closet and threw her in, food and water and a mini kitty box already set up in there from the night before. She began to hiss and scratch the door as I smiled to myself, feeling accomplished. Now, on to that tree.

~X~x~X~

So the tree was taller than it seemed. I had some difficulties reaching the top and nearly toppled over before Antonio let himself in and caught me. Now, I mentioned earlier that Antonio can be cute, but shoosh! It's a secret that I like him and, yes, I do plan on telling him... eventually. Anyway, like I was saying, I was rescued by Antonio just in the nick of time. Then he helped me apply the tree topping. We stepped back to admire my work and I must say, that tree looked fiiiiiiine~.

Then the two of us sat and talked and stuff. The conversation went something like this:

"Hey, Lovi! I just wanted to drop by and see if you guys needed any help."

"Tch, like we need any help from stupid bastards like yourself."

"Ahahaha~ okay, I'll see what I can do. Perhaps Feli needs my help, hmm~?"

"Ajfkhdshjfdshakl- fine."

I swear to the heavenly father that bitch knows my secret feelings of secret gayness.

As it turns out, he doesn't. Damn, my life would have been easier if he did then kissed me and then we lived a gay ever after.

Anyway, we actually did end up needing his height and strength to set up some decorations so I guess it was good thing the oblivious bastard came over. Well, it was until he opened up a certain closet with a certain evil kitty in it thinking there might be a stool in it. Can you guess who was mauled? That's right, Antonio. Stupid Mrs. Kitty must have thought he was me when he opened the door. So, being the sneak he was, Feli had me take Antonio up to the bathroom and bandage him up.

"Gracias, Lovi, for bandaging me up." He smiled as I wiped off some caked on blood off of three scratch marks that seemed pretty deep.

"Yeah, your welcome or some shit." I pressed a little too hard on accident due to my apparently intense locked away feelings.

"Uh, Lovi, you're kind of hurting me." He grabbed my wrist with his hand and pulled it away. "Is something bothering you, amigo?" I froze as I heard shuffling from outside the door and ran to shut it as Mrs. Kitty came stalking up to it, panting in fear.

"I can never leave this bathroom or else I'll die." I muttered to myself. I looked up just in time to watch a hand disappear into the vent, mistletoe in its place. My eyes widened at the realization that Feli set this entire thing up!

"Huh? Why do you guys have mistletoe in the bathroom? You guys are so strange." Antonio laughed. "But we better follow the rules." Suddenly I was being pulled against Antonio and his lips were pressing against mine, rather gently for someone who just tried to kill me. I threw my arms up around his neck and pressed my lips back passionately (or what I hoped was passionate) and he pressed my back into the sink.

"Oh, Lovi," he said quietly when we separated. "you have no idea how long I've been wanting to kiss you again." He pressed his lips against mine again.

"Wait," I pulled away, "What do you mean "again"?" I eyed him suspiciously.

"You don't remember." He smiled "We kissed at Francis's party last week when you got really drunk. Don't worry, it was in a private room so no one saw us." Oh. Well, as long as know one else saw that kiss...

"Kiss me again, damn it. And this time, kiss me so hard we both get hard and Feli has to put decorations up wearing earmuffs just to focus." I commanded and he laughed loudly.

"Glad to."