Silvara Maxwell ~ Okay, well… I finished my one story (Still posting the chapters) and I decided it was time to torture Ryoku (The Hero) and Jowy a little. Well… it's not torture… They just dislike lemons! ^_^

Disclaimer ~ Don't own, don't sue..

Warnings ~ Slash: boy on boy lovin'! And a lemon.. Spoilers, probably… A bit of fluff somewhere too and possible OOC (Corniness ensues!)

Pairings ~ The Suikoden II Hero and Jowy

Note ~ Suikoden II Hero is named Ryoku and he leads the Star Army

'Thoughts' (In the ' ' and italics)

Flashback/Dream (In just italics)

Forever and a Day

Ryoku's left thumb rubbed absently over the top of his right hand. Under his finger, beneath the glove he wore over it, was the symbol of his half of the True Rune, 'The Bright Shield Rune'. His gaze focused intently on the person walking a few feet in front of him, the holder of the other half of the Rune and his best friend. The long, blond hair, swishing gently along his back before parting to rest gently on either side of his knapsack, entranced him, tan skin glinting with a sheen of sweat, visible muscles flexing…

It had been nearly five months since their final confrontation as 'The King of Highland' and the 'Leader of the Star Army', but Ryoku could still recall with startlingly clarity the fight, the conversation, when Jowy nearly… nearly… nearly died. Something had run through him at that moment, a deeper kind of fear at losing Jowy, that went far passed the loving friendship he knew they shared.

He had spent many nights under the starry skies trying to identify what it was, wondering when the feeling started. Looking back over their friendship, nearly a year before they had ever joined the Highland Youth Brigade, Ryoku couldn't find even one encounter, one memory with Jowy that wasn't colored by that feeling. He just simply couldn't ever remember not feeling it, the warmth in his heart reserved only for Jowy, and had taken it for granted, never peering closer to wonder what it was. Then, when he almost lost him, the feeling magnified ten- fold, and Ryoku was alarmed that such a feeling could exist within him with the depth and intensity it had, and never be noticed before.

Ryoku knew it for what it was now, could place a name on a feeling so wondrous and indefinable that it was almost wrong to label it, knew it as love. Ever since then, it felt as if a rather large rock had taken up residence in the pit of his stomach, making him slightly ill and despaired at something that could never be. Because it was wrong. Besides, Jowy loved Nanami at any rate, he was almost sure of it. And Ryoku couldn't deny the way Nanami looked at him with her heart in her eyes, could only fervently hope that his eyes didn't look the same. Over the past few days, as his feelings became increasingly difficult to ignore, the nausea increased, imagining Jowy's disgust should he ever found out.

But… could anything that felt so right… really be so wrong?

Ryoku shook his head at his hopelessness, flinging several beads of sweat off his plastered down hair. Damn it, it was hot. A muzzy, dazed feeling slowed his thought process down, and he couldn't even manage mentally scolding himself as he watched Jowy through the heat- filled, shimmering air. He blinked blearily as his sister and friend came to a halt, and he barely coordinated himself enough to stop, too, before he ran into Jowy.

"…What do you think, Ryoku?" Nanami was talking to him… Nanami. Her voice swam in and out of his ears as he tried to make out what she was saying.

"Ryoku? Ryoku?! RYOKU!!" Now, Jowy and Nanami were looking at him in concern, worry apparent on both their faces. He forced a brittle smile, drawing on his last energy stores to hold it there and answer them.

"Huh? Sorry… I spaced out for a second there…"

"You 'spaced out for a second there'…? Ryoku, are you feeling all right? You haven't been looking very well for the past week," Nanami frowned at him in a motherly fashion.

"I'm fine… Really. Just a little hot, that's all."

Jowy and Nanami glanced at each other, then Jowy grabbed Ryoku's pack. "C'mon. There's some shade over there, and maybe we'll find some water. Let's get you out of the heat for the rest of the day, okay?"

Ryoku nodded, unable to refuse, or utter a response of any sort. He followed them as far as his legs would take him, then pushed himself even farther to kneel by the small water hole, an oasis in the middle of the hot, barren grasslands. He took off his gloves and splashed the water on his face, refreshing despite its warmth, then settled beneath a tree.

"I'm fine, really… Don't worry. I'll just rest here for a bit, 'kay?" The two, who had been watching him the entire time, nodded reluctantly and moved towards the water hole themselves.

Heavy eyelids closed as he could no longer expend enough energy to keep them open. It was just so tiring, holding it in all the time, worrying constantly and placing such stress on himself. It was reminiscent of when he led the Star Army, the same yet different at once; no one was now dependent on himself except for himself, and it gave him far too much time to think instead of do, too much time to place so many demands, emotional and physical, upon himself. Then, it was easier to decide what to do, every one of his companions backing his decisions, but now he was left alone with himself and his uncertainty.

A buzzing sound grew in Ryoku's ears, loud and annoying. There was something else to, a higher- pitched voice and a lovely tenor his heart, if not his mind, placed immediately. He couldn't understand, couldn't make his way past the fuzziness, the feeling of being wrapped in layers of cotton, as inky blackness claimed his consciousness and he knew no more.

"I'm sorry I didn't notice sooner… Sorry I made us continue for so far without realizing…"

"Ryoku? RYOKU!" Jowy and Nanami looked happy and relieved.

"Jowy, Nanami!"

"Are you all right?" Jowy asked in concern.

"Fine, just a little sca-- hungry. I didn't have anything to eat. Tired a bit, too."

"Come on! I saved some of my special dinner for you!" Nanami ran inside excitedly.

Jowy grinned. "Good luck eating that… and… I'm sorry."

"My own fault for getting lost in the woods…"

"But, I wanted to go in them…"

"And I followed you by myself, and got lost by myself."

Jowy smiled and nodded. "I was… worried about you. I'm glad you're okay…"

***

"…But I've got you now, you'll be all right…"

Jowy turned, looking away from the door of the tent, face bathed in pale moonlight. "Sorry, did I wake you?"

"No… Jowy? What's wrong?"

"…Nothing."

"Jowy?"

He sighed. "I never could keep anything from you, could I?"

"Nope!"

"Yeah," Jowy grinned.

"…So?"

"Oh, well, I was just feeling… a bit homesick, to tell the truth. It's just… strange being out here, in the army, fighting in a war, away from Nanami and Kyaro…"

"It is, isn't it? But, we'll be back soon, don't worry."

"Will we?"

"Yes, I'm sure. Already, they're throwing around the idea of a peace treaty, so I'm sure we won't be here much longer…"

"Thanks, Ryoku."

"No problem, just get some sleep. It's late out."

"Okay."

***

"Please… PLEASE hang on… Don't die on me, you can't… you won't…"

"JOWY!!!"

"I… I used too much power… the Beast Rune that Luca tried to free… I had to… use my… 'Black Sword Rune' to stop it… Our Rune… together… they make a True Rune… But… if you use it by itself… it takes your life…" 'Your… life? Your life?! JOWY?!'

"Ryoku… I'm going to die anyway…" 'NO! No you're not!'

"So… I give you… my life… so the two Runes can become one again… Ryoku… your right hand…"

"I can't do that."

"Ryoku… I… I'm sorry… I can't stand it anymore… all the lives I stole…" 'Like when it was me sending men to their death, it was any better?!'

"All the people I hurt…" 'And you want to make it worse by hurting me again?! Hurting me everyday I see that Rune on my hand?!'

"I can't do that." 'I can't, and I won't damn it! Because you're not going to die! Weren't you listening the first time I told you no?!'

"Please… I beg of you… don't let our dream have been in vain…"

"I can't do that." 'Our dream in vain? What good is a dream, what good is peace, when the people you love, when the ONLY PERSON YOU LOVE LEFT ALIVE, dies?'

"…Ryoku… please… There's no… time… Please… I'm ready…"

"Even so… I can't…" 'I can't Jowy, I can't! NO! You won't die, please don't die… God Jowy, please PLEASE don't die… You can't… You can't die on me…'

Ryoku could feels his stomach clench at that last memory and concentrated on the voice that murmured soothingly and the cool hand that rested on his fevered head. Tiny droplets of water sprinkled his face as a wet rag was place on his forehead. Fingers gripped at his right hand, threaded through his own comfortingly.

"Please… be okay…" The words danced around in his haze- fogged mind, and Ryoku gripped them, clung to them desperately as he tried to rid himself of the darkness that pervaded his senses, prevented him from seeing where he was.

'What happened?' The last thing he could remember was resting on the ground as Jowy and Nanami looked on worriedly… This felt nothing like the hard ground he had been lying on, softer and more comfortable, and the air felt different. Still hot, but not as dusty and maybe a smidgen cooler.

Ryoku fought desperately with his body to fully awaken when he felt something warm and a bit chapped brush against his cheek, then hot breath whispering in his ear. "Please be all right, Ryoku… I… I love you."

The last part was softer, whoever was with him pulling away, and probably not meant to be heard. Ryoku managed to force his eyes open for a fleeting second, but he was so tired… So tired… It hurt to stay awake, and he couldn't do it anymore… But as the blackness once again claimed his mind, Ryoku held fast to the words and flash of honey- blond hair he glimpsed.

***

Ryoku groaned at the bright light that brought him back into consciousness and blinked his eyes dazedly. Snatches of memories gnawed at him, fragmented images of nightmares, arms wrapping around his body to calm him, and cold liquid being forced into his open mouth. A stiff white sheet was tucked around his body, and he lay on a stuffed- straw mattress in a small room.

"Ryoku!" The loud noise startled him, hurt his ears, and he winced. He felt himself being raised off the bed slightly, engulfed in a hug, and nose buried in someone's shoulder. A deep breathe, and he inhaled a scent that, even though slightly sweaty, was uniquely Jowy-- there were no other words to describe it, but this. He savored the embrace for as long as he could, blush creeping up his face as he realized he was naked save the sheet, until Jowy pulled back and looked at him with a tired, haggard face and bloodshot eyes.

"You're awake, thank god."

"…Awake?" Ryoku's tongue felt thick and sluggish; it took him a few tries to get the words out properly.

"Yes, awake. You were sick for a week, delirious, and we were so worried about you… I was so worried about you."

"Sick?"

Jowy nodded. "One of those dragonfly- looking monsters that lives around here stung you, and you got poisoned. Nanami used an antidote on you while I beat it, but you wouldn't wake up, and we noticed that you were unusually hot-- all flushed and sweaty. Nanami thought you might have a fever, so I carried you to the nearest inn, and for the past week you've been unconscious, having all sorts of nightmares."

"Oh… Sorry…"

"Sorry? What for? Just… You're all right and that's all that matters, huh? But… Please, next time you don't feel well… tell me, okay?"

Ryoku nodded his head slowly, "Okay." Then, he looked around the room, bare of everything but the bed, two chairs, and their knapsacks. "Where's Nanami?"

"She… She went to get something to eat… We've been sitting here the entire time, so worried, and I told her to go… Want me to get her back? She'll be so happy to know you're awake…"

"No… Let her eat…"

"Okay." Jowy smiled again, looked so happy and relieved, and hugged him again. "What about you? Are you hungry? Something to eat? You should probably-"

"No," Ryoku told him as he stood up. "No. Just… stay, please? I'm fine… just a little tired, that's all."

"I don't trust you when you say that-- it always means you're sick and feel like shit, but won't tell anyone because you don't want them worried."

Ryoku grinned weakly at him, and Jowy smiled back. Something nagged at the back of Ryoku's mind, words that kept him fighting the darkness and helped him when he was scared, words that he must have dreamed up… right? He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, resting comfortably for a minute, then looked straight at Jowy.

Perhaps the fuzziness in his head prevented him from thinking straight, made him ignore the little warning bells going off loudly in his mind, but Ryoku knew there would never be another chance like this. He screwed up his courage, preparing himself if Jowy should toss his heart carelessly away, and took a chance that he hadn't hallucinated those words.

"…Jowy?"

"Yes?"

"Were you… with me… here, the entire time?"

"Of course."

"Did you… Well, I mean… Do you…" His courage suddenly seemed to fail, and Ryoku wondered where in the hell it went hiding to.

"Ryoku?" Jowy looked at his friend curiously as he stammered and turned faintly pink.

"…How do you feel about Nanami?" 'Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!'

"She's like a sister to me."

"That's it?"

"That's it." Jowy frowned at Ryoku. "Why?"

"N-no reason…" Jowy gave him a look that clearly said, 'I know you too well to believe that' and demanded to know the truth.

"No… I was… probably just hallucinating, like you said I did. But I remember someone saying 'I love you' and I thought maybe that was you and Nanami…" 'Damn it! LIAR! Just tell him, already!'

Jowy's eyes widened in surprise for a moment, then his face went impassive, and Ryoku's heart dropped a little. "Maybe you heard Nanami telling you? She was pretty worried, after all."

"N-no… It was you… Nanami doesn't have blond hair, and that's what I saw… But I was probably just hallucinating, so forget about it."

Ryoku looked away, trying to ignore the ache building in his chest, and missed pained look that passed over Jowy's face. "…Ryoku… You're my… best friend and I care about you a lot…"

"Please… just forget about it, okay?"

"No, I… Ryoku…" He pressed the side of his face into the pillow, doing his best to look asleep, and Jowy sighed in frustration. He moved to sit next to the younger boy on the bed and took his hand in his own.

"When you were sick… And I thought you were going to die and I pleaded with you to hold on… I mean, I didn't know you were awake to hear…"

Ryoku opened one eye to look into Jowy's nervous, red- tinged face, and suddenly found where his courage went to. Before he could think about it and lose his nerve, he grabbed Jowy's shoulders, pulling him down and pressing their lips together briefly.

He swallowed past the lump in his throat as he let go and Jowy pulled away, trying to gauge his reaction. The blond looked more shocked than anything else, mouth working in vain to form words, so Ryoku decided he may as well plunge in all the way.

"I wanted to know… because, well… I love you."

There was a long pause and just as he felt his heart about to shatter into a million pieces, Jowy gave him a small, tentative smile. "You… love me…? Like… more than a friend?"

Ryoku nodded, and the smile grew wider. Then Jowy bent down, and he felt warmth and happiness flow through him as those soft pink, dry chapped lips collided with his own. "I love you, too."

Jowy ran his fingers through Ryoku's tangled hair and looked down tenderly at him as Ryoku yawned sleepily. "Rest now… I'll get you up in a bit for some food."

Ryoku nodded again, then tightened hand on their still clasped fingers. "Stay."

Jowy kissed the top of his forehead and leaned down to whisper in his ear. "Always. I'll never leave you."

***

(WARNING: The rest is pretty much a lemon, so if you squick at gay sex, don't read.)

"Psst… Ryoku… Are you asleep?"

"No," Ryoku turned over in his sleeping bag to face Jowy and raised an eyebrow questioningly. They had been together for nearly four months, stealing moments together when they thought Nanami wasn't looking, though they weren't entirely sure whether or not she was oblivious to their relationship. It was just that they didn't want to hurt her, wanted to be together a little bit longer before they told her.

"Do you want to… take a walk with me?"

"Sure." They both wriggled out of their sleeping bags, careful not to wake Nanami, and sneaked quietly away into the woods, barren grasslands having given way to trees nearly a month ago.

"C'mon…" Jowy grabbed Ryoku's hand, entwining their fingers, and led him along the river they camped near. Once they were sufficiently far enough away not to have to worry about being quiet, Jowy pulled them down to sit leaning against the trunk of a tree. Ryoku settled himself into Jowy's embrace, leaning back on his chest as arms wrapped around him.

They sat silently for a long while, gazing at the stars and enjoying the other's presence. An owl hooted somewhere far off, and the moon rose higher in the sky as the night wore on. Ryoku felt relaxed and completely at ease, lulled into a drowsy state, and felt himself drifting off to sleep when warm lips pressed themselves against the side of his neck.

He shivered involuntarily as a wet tongue lightly licked upward towards his ear, and teeth gently nipped at it's bottom. Ryoku turned slowly in Jowy's arms, looking into eyes filled with love, and brought their mouths together in a kiss. Lips massaged each other and Jowy's tongue flickered along the outline of Ryoku's.

Warmth spread through Ryoku's body as they continued, kisses becomes deeper in intensity until their lips were crushed to each other with a bruising force and tongues delved into the depths of the warm, moist cavern of their mouths, fingers threading through each other's hair. Ryoku felt himself being lowered to the ground, and he kissed his way downward to suck on the soft skin of Jowy's neck.

"Mmm…" Fingers danced along his chest, coming to rest on the belt he wore, and Ryoku looked up into Jowy's questioning eyes. Slowly, cheeks burning, he nodded, and Jowy leaned up to kiss him again, quickly undoing the buckle.

"God… I want you, Ryoku…" Jowy shifted so the bulge in his pant's pressed against the other's, and Ryoku arched his back into the older boy, taking a shaky gasp of breath in surprise. He bucked his hips, rubbing himself against Jowy, and loving the delicious friction it created.

Ryoku tugged on Jowy's shirt, pulling it out of his pants and over his head, throwing it away while Jowy did the same to his own and his bandana. Shoes were kicked off and Ryoku's gloves were quickly disposed of, leaving them in nothing but their pants. Jowy's hair fell over his shoulder, brushing across Ryoku's sensitive nipples, and eliciting a groan from him. Their mouths met again in a hot, slick kiss as bare skin touched for the first time, and they continued rocking their hips against one another, increasing to a feverish pace.

"Nn… God… Jowy… wh-what?" Ryoku's moans ended in a mewling note as Jowy held Ryoku's hips firmly, moving to kiss and lick his way down the smaller boy's chest. He squirmed and wriggled, making short breathy noises, as Jowy sucked on one hardened nub, teeth nipping gently, then applied the same treatment to the other. Pleasure tingled through out every fiber of his being, racing up and down his skin, arcing in a line of fire from wherever Jowy touched straight to his groin.

"…Can I?" Jowy paused at the waistband to Ryoku's pants, and then, at his nod, rid both of them of the last vestiges of their clothing. Ryoku could feel his cheeks blushing as Jowy gazed longingly at his bare, aroused body, but didn't look away. His breath caught in his throat as Jowy slid up him, catching his swollen lips again in a passionate kiss.

"Ryoku… I want… I want to be… in you…" Jowy nuzzled his cheek with his nose, then moved back to stare in his eyes. Ryoku was confused for a moment, then swallowed hard, nodding his head as he realized what Jowy meant.

"Are you… sure? It's going to… to hurt… for your first time… our first time…"

"I know, but I… I trust you, because… I love you…"

Jowy smiled tenderly, face filled with affection and desire. "I love you, too."

He looked around for a minute, then stood up, pulling Ryoku after him. Jowy removed the circlet around his head, kissing his forehead, and placed it carefully on the ground. He led him into the cool river water, up to their chests, and turned to face him again. At Ryoku's confused look, he explained, "I don't have anything to make it easier, lubrication, but this will help…"

"…Okay…" Ryoku kissed Jowy gently, placing his hands on his shoulders, and spread his legs wider, pushing their bodies together. One finger trailed down his spine, then hesitantly nudged his entrance, slowly entering him.

"Is that… Is that all right?" Jowy murmured against his lips, and Ryoku slid his tongue into the open mouth, reaching down with his right hand to intertwine their fingers and squeezing encouragingly. After a few moments, Jowy inserted another finger, stretching Ryoku and trying not to pain him.

Ryoku squirmed in discomfort, but continued urging Jowy on. His fingers tangled in Jowy's mass of soft, long hair and pulled the leather thong out that held it up, letting it loose and running his fingers through it. Then, just as he was getting used to the sensation, it was gone, Jowy's hands settling on his hip.

Ryoku reached upward to kiss him and held onto Jowy, wrapping his legs around his waist. "Go on… please…"

Jowy positioned himself at Ryoku's entrance and slid slowly in, groaning softly and suppressing the urge to go in one swift stroke. The smaller boy's face twisted in discomfort and he buried his head in the other's shoulder, gripping him tightly. Jowy hugged him, remaining unmoving, and tugged Ryoku up to face him.

"We don't have to… if you don't want to… We can stop now…" Jowy kissed away the tears forming in the corner of his eyes, and Ryoku shook his head.

"No… It just… It just hurt for a moment. It's fine now, really… I like having you in me… Move… please… I want to feel you moving in me…"

Jowy nodded and lifted Ryoku up a little, then brought him back down, trying to find some sort of rhythm as they moved together, up and down. Discomfort warred with tiny sparks of pleasure in the younger boy, and he kissed Jowy, thrusting his tongue into the other's mouth.

"Jowy!" Then, Ryoku's entire body seized up and pleasure thrummed throughout his veins as Jowy hit something in him, and he called out his lover's name. Jowy stopped in alarm, thinking he hurt him, and looked at him in concern.

"NO! Don't stop… Please don't stop…" Ryoku wriggled and moved up and down, impaling himself slightly on Jowy in effort to get him to move again. "Do that again… PLEASE… Do that again!"

Jowy smiled and kissed Ryoku, beginning to build a rhythm again, pulling out slightly as he pushed Ryoku up, then slamming together again. Every nerve ending tingled in pleasure as he snaked one hand between their bodies to pump Ryoku's arousal, his smaller lover holding onto him tightly and pushing himself up and down enthusiastically.

"RYOKU!" He felt something coil tightly in his abdomen, pleasure reaching an almost unbearable level, then releasing into Ryoku's body, barely remembering to keep his hand moving. Ryoku's nail bit into the skin of his shoulder as he squeezed his eyes tightly shut, body shuddering violently as Jowy's warm seed splashed his insides. He brought his hand down, placing it over Jowy's, and pumping up and down with him. He gave a hoarse, wordless shout before he followed the blond over the ecstasy, white sticky fluid covering both their chests, before being washed away by the water.

"…Wow…" Jowy managed to smile weakly and pant out as he caught his breath. Ryoku could only nod in agreement, untangling his limbs from around the other's body, and making his way back onto dry land. They flopped down in an ungraceful heap and curled up with each other, Jowy resting his head on Ryoku's chest, and twining their limbs again.

They dozed comfortably together, waking up occasionally, then falling back asleep again. As the sun began to peek over the horizon, Ryoku stirred, sitting up and cradling Jowy in his arms.

"C'mon… wake up, love… Jooowyyyy… Time to get up…"

"No… I don't like mornings…"

"You have to get up anyway. We have to get back before Nanami wakes up and gets worried."

Jowy grumbled and groaned, but got himself up to help look for the clothes they threw about last night. Ryoku could feel himself blushing as he washed the dirt off him and pulled on his clothes, turning away from Jowy.

"Mm… Love you…" Jowy came up from behind him, wrapping his arms around him and kissing his cheek. "Now, c'mon… We've got to start cooking before Nanami gets up… I don't want to eat whatever she makes…"

Ryoku laughed and followed his boyfriend, feeling happy and contented, knowing they were at beginning something wonderful, something that would last forever and a day.

Silvara Maxwell ~ So? What do you think for a one- shot? Review please! Sorry about the weird indents…. *Glares at Computer*

Silvara Maxwell ~ And for anyone who didn't get it, the first part in italics in when Ryoku got lost in the woods. The second part is when Jowy and him were in the Highland Youth Brigade, and the last part is the actual conversation when you refuse to fight Jowy and don't take his rune (With Ryoku's thoughts during the conversation thrown in). The part in quotations is Jowy talking while Ryoku's hallucinating/flashback/dreaming.