Slap.

Slap.

Slap.

Slap.

Slap.

Mother of god, that didn't sound right.

Out of all the things Steve Rogers should have been worried about, all the things that should feel different, it was the sound of his bare feet hitting the tile that stuck out the most to him. It wasn't his loose clothes, his shorter form, or even the lack of… support in certain areas, just the sound. He missed the thudding of heavy foot falls, not these dainty slaps his feet made.

Pull it together Steve, he thought to himself.i You've dealt with worse. Just keep calm.

Right, okay, so the "being calm" front was a weak one. Probably the only reason he hadn't lost his grip on his sanity was his focus on running and the hope of help at his destination.

Steve slid to a halt at a locked door at the end of the hallway. "Jarvis, I need access to the lab!"

The computer program, watching him through a small lens at one corner of the door, was silent for only a moment. "He has requested not to be disturbed."

"Jarvis, this is important!" Steve pressed, pushing on the door impatiently. Quite honestly, the sound of his own voice was causing him a small a panic attack. "I've got a bit of a problem!"

The computer was silent for another moment and the camera on the door clicked softly, as if the lens was adjusting its focus. "I believe that may be an understatement, Ms. Rogers," the computer replied just as the door hissed open.

"Don't call me that," Steve told the AI before dashing into the doorway.

Tony Stark had learned rather quickly that having a group like the Avengers all occupying the same general space meant there was a lack of proper "work space," or the simple peace and quiet required to get anything productive done. At all. To solve this problem, he had quickly set up a system of work hours, also known to some as the "stay the hell away from Tony's lab" hours. It wasn't so much that he chewed out anyone who disturbed him so much as assigned them terrible chores equal to the amount of time he felt their disturbance had cost him. Needless to say, the others had quickly learned to vacate that area of the mansion during his lab hours.

Of course, there were those times when someone either had a legitimate need to disturb him or just seemed to crave garbage duty.

"Sir, I have granted Captain America access into your lab due to a matter of importance," Jarvis suddenly piped up.

"What kind of matter?" Tony asked, straightened up from his bent position. He dabbed the tip of his soldering iron on a wet sponge and set it back on its holder. Wires from one of his Iron Man suits lay on the table in a tangled heap near part of the armor's hip plating. Today was what he liked to call "Maintenance Monday."

"I believe it's best for you to see for yourself, sir," Jarvis responded just as another voice came from the hall.

"Tony?" the soft voice questioned just as a figure emerged from around the corner. "Something's wrong, but I'm not sure what happened…!"

Well hello… was naturally Tony's first thought, which showed through in a charming, almost predatory smile at the lovely woman gracing his lab in what was possibly the most simple, but also might have been the single most intoxicating bedroom attire he had ever seen.

She stood, one hand braced on the wall, the other hand clasped against her obviously bra-less chest. Her lovely bare feet were planted firmly on the ground, despite the flighty look the rest of her posture held. Both her shirt and pants hung loose on her, covering her curves in some places, yet showing just enough off in others that it made the look incredible sexy. The pants hung low on her hips, threatening to fall off should she not watch herself and the shirt… Well let's just say he was glad that he kept his lab on the chilly side. With the way it hung down across her chest, he could see just about everything through it, despite the shield design that adorned it—

Whoa whoa whoa, stop. Back up.

Tony's eyes focused on the center of the T-shirt, bugging out to the size of dinner plates.

"Tony. Please stop staring at my chest."

"Holy shit," Tony gasped. "Please don't tell me that's you, Steve."

"It's me," Steve replied, sighing in that cute feminine way.

No, no, no. Abort. Abort. Abort male programming. Oh my god, shut my brain off.

"What… How did you even…?" Tony breathed, tearing his eyes away from that shirt and forcing himself to stare into female Steve's eyes. Looking there didn't help. It seemed that brief moment of not knowing who the beautiful woman standing in his lab was had gotten… iareas/i warmed up and ready and not willing to stop even though that was Steve.

"I don't know!" Steve groaned. "I woke up this morning and I just…!" She glanced down at her breasts, her face turning into a pout before she threw her hands in the air. "I was like this!"

For a brief moment, Tony could only watch as the rest of Steve's body… jiggled in response to the movement.

Steve saw the look and immediately tucked her hands under her armpits, trapping her rather large and unrestrained lady parts to her chest. "Sorry," she sighed. "This is probably… Hard for you."

"Oh you have no idea."

"Hey, I'm the one who woke up like this."

"Are you saying you gave yourself a thorough check over before you came running for help?"

"Tony!" Steve yelped, her face flushing.

"Sorry, sorry." He sighed, rubbing his hand across his eyes. "I was hoping some stupid humor would help take some of the tension off."

"Believe me, if I thought stupid humor would take the edge off, I would have showed up cracking jokes about calling me Stephanie," Steve groaned.

"….Can I?"

"No."

"Well then how about a little squeeze?" Tony asked, holding his hands up to make groping motions in the air.

Steve glared and tightened her arms over her chest. "I liked it better when you were struggling not to be attracted to me."

"Who said I'm still not?"

"Fine, I liked it better when you were horrified by the fact rather than amused by it like you are now."

"I'm starting to find it's easier to deal with the emotional trauma of being attracted to your best friend when you choke back the horror and just go with being an ass about it."

"Look, can you just help me figure out a way to get back to normal?" Steve snapped, looking a mix between angry and petrified. Apparently the brief humor between the two hadn't done a lot to help Steve's emotional state.

Tony raised an eyebrow at the blonde. "How?"

"I don't know! Just do something!"

"Steve- Stephanie- Whoever you are now," Tony said, waving a hand when the female glared. "If you magically changed genders, then Thor is a better source to go to for help. Not me."

"Thor? Uh…." Steve murmured, her eyes turning to the floor. She shuddered lightly, obviously imagining the meeting. "If I have to go see him like this, I'll need a…. I can't believe I'm saying this, I'll need a bra."

Of course, Tony's immediate reaction was a bark of laughter. "Oh yeah, we have to get you into a bra before you can face the others. Your priorities are in order."

Steve flushed a shade of red that looked far too nice on a face framed by soft blonde hair. "Shut up. They… feel weird, okay?" she said. "Just help me find something!"

"I could go see if Pepper's got any spares with her."

"No!"

Tony grinned. "Oh you're right, sorry. Hers are way smaller. What was I thinking?"

"Tony, you do realize that female or not, I can still kick your butt across New York and back, right?"

"Right, sorry," the millionaire said, grinning and holding his hands up in surrender. "I'll just go check my bra drawer and see if I have one that'll fit you."

Steve's eye narrowed at him, a soft growl building in her throat. "Look: If you don't have something I can wear underneath… can you at LEAST get me a shirt that isn't see-through?"

"Sure thing babe." Tony smirked, moving toward a closet on one side of the room. "Can't have anyone else looking at what is only for my eyes to see, right?"

The only response he got was a sour look as Steve stomped daintily after him.