Hm, say hello to yet another fic! ...This one will probably be even more crack-ish than all the others... Yay! ^.^

DISCLAIMER FOR THE WHOLE FIC: I don't own Naruto...as a matter of fact, I own nothing of Naruto other than a Gaara pillow (which I made myself) a Suna headband, and one suna glove. (Yes, one. My friend who gave it to me can't find the other...-.-")

-X

"You don't mean that?"

"Yes, I certainly do."

"Well I mean it should've been done like this."

"No, no it shouldn't."

"Yes, I think maybe it should."

"Shut it."

"I believe you just stole the words out of my mouth."

"Did not."

"I didn't talk to you."

Kakashi came to the team 7 training ground expecting the day to be like normal. Arrive late, being yelled at, going to do a few D-ranks, get yelled at some more, train, leave. Unfortunately, it seemed that would not be the case.

"Erm…yo?" The silver-haired man said uncertainly. His three cute students looked up. "Ah, you're here." Sakura noticed. "Aa. It seems he is." Naruto remarked with a casual flick of his wrist. "Well, we better move then. Shoo." Sasuke waved his hands.

"…?"

XXX

"No. You cannot kill the cat with the kunai."

"You sure?"

"She is. We'll use the wire."

"Oh, yeah…should we tie on an explosive tag too? I have a couple of my own."

"…Good idea."

Kakashi looked quite panicked as he dashed trough the forest to stop his not-so-cute little students from killing the target, listening to them trough the radio they each had.

'…Since when did Naruto get his own explosive tags?'

XXX

A singed, very irritated sensei was glaring at his three not-cute-at-all students. "What the hell are the three of you doing?" He demanded.

"Trying to kill a devil cat?" Sakura suggested. Kakashi glared even more.

"Eh, suggestion: Take us on a C-rank mission?" Naruto said with a raised eyebrow. Kakashi scowled. "Not a chance. As a matter of fact, all three of you are suspended for a month!" He claimed.

"Oh. That long? Hm…Naruto, when does the bar open?" Sasuke asked, disregarding their pissed off, confused teacher.

"About 1700, I think. That's five hours." Naruto sighed. "Damn." Sakura pouted cutely. Kakashi sighed heavily.

"…To the Hokage's office."

XXX

"Okay…now we have a problem, I think."

"Yes, it seems that is the case."

"…We need some booze. Helps clearing things up."

"Quite. So, we're coming over to you. I'll pack my stuff, and we'll meet up at Yoi Suzume, hm?"

Sasuke nodded his consent, and Naruto and Sakura left to pack. The dark-haired boy himself just took a walk. He calmly strolled around a corner and abruptly stopped.

'…Fangirls…' A horde of girls, and was that some older women too, was standing in his way.

What is a man to do…? The answer is of course…run away.

Sasuke hurriedly ran somewhat comically with flailing arms away, up a wall, jumped over to a rope hanging over two roofs and stood there looking down at the screaming women.

"…M'ladies, you will always remember this as the day you almost caught up to Uchiha Sasuke!" The dark-haired boy said jovially, and continued bouncing over the roofs. Several took up chase, while some were left with stupefied expressions.

"…Sasuke…?" A certain blonde girl said dazed, never once having seen the antisocial boy act like…like…Naruto! The blonde, Ino growled. 'This is all Naruto's fault I bet!' She thought, and set out to find the blonde boy.

Meanwhile, Naruto was calmly packing his stuff, and Sakura was sneaking out of her house.

XXX

"Naruto!" A shrill voice screamed, and Naruto flinched, looking at Ino who was storming towards him. "What have you done to Sasuke?" The girl demanded. Naruto blinked.

"I've done something?" He asked curiously. "Yes you have! Sasuke was acting like you! And he was all…cheerful and wobbly and…!" Ino screamed. Naruto blinked again. "Oh that. No, that's just something he finds funny. It originated when he drank too much." He explained with an airy wave.

"Sasuke doesn't drink! You liar!" Ino yelled.

"Whoever said I didn't? It's a lovely feeling, being drunk that is." Sasuke said as he jumped down from a roof. Ino gaped. "Sasuke!" She yelled. Sasuke winced. "I hear ye, I hear ye. No need to yell, bonny lass."

"Now, now. Don't confuse the poor little piglet." Sakura said as she poofed into place beside the two. "Wah, forehead? What are you doing? Sasuke is acting like that deadlast!" Ino shrieked.

"Aye, that be true."

"Well, do something then!"

"Why would I do that? What lies in it for me?" Sakura wagged her finger in front of Ino's face, and flicked her in the forehead, causing the blonde girl to fly backwards into a wall.

"Since when were you that strong?" Ino gaped. Sakura shrugged. "Since I actually trained?" She suggested.

"Ah, we have no more time to spill! Come now, move, move, move!" Naruto made a shooing motion with his hands and the three members of team 7 hurried along. Ino was left dumbfounded.

XXX

"So, aside for the brief moments of piratey craziness, we're good."

"Don't forget that we tried to end Tora's misery. Again."

"I didn't forget it. I just…suppressed it."

"Whatever. The bar's open a little early today, it seems."

"Yay!"

People looked weirdly at the trio of strange teens as they went into Yoi Suzume, one of Konoha's well-known trouble-places.

"Welcome. Hm, aren't you guys a little young to be coming here?" A petite woman with leather clothes and scarred hands asked with a slight smile.

"Probably, yes." Naruto answered airily. "Indeed." Sakura added. "But we're shinobi, are we not?" Sasuke finished. The woman laughed. "Yeah, yeah. But don't expect me to help you when you get into trouble. What'll it be?" She asked, leaning towards them.

"I'll have some sake." Naruto grinned. Sasuke shrugged. "Sake." He chose. Sakura tilted her head. "I'll take some sake too, thanks." She beamed. The woman nodded and got their orders. "My name's Yoru. Just in case you needed to know." She said as they paid for the drinks and sat at an empty table.

"Hoh? Since when did Yoru allow pipsqueaks in here?" A rough though feminine voice asked. Sasuke turned to see Anko Mitarashi grin at them. He shrugged. "Since they could talk for themselves, I'd say." He replied calmly.

"Or maybe she just likes us. We have that effect on people." Naruto said with a tilted head. "Maybe both." Sakura added, sipping her sake. Anko came over towards them. "Oh? You're tough, huh? Now that I think about it… You're Kakashi's brats aren't ya? Heard you got into some trouble." She chuckled.

Naruto grinned. "I wouldn't say trouble outright… we just tried to rid the world of the evil Tora, and Kakashi wouldn't let us blow it up. Suspended us, even." He sighed dramatically, and Anko sat down on a free chair. "Not even one of you have thrown up yet, and you're trying to blow up cats, wow, I have to say Kakashi got a nice bunch." She exclaimed.

"Yup. Though it seems he doesn't share your meanings." Sakura nodded sagely. Anko laughed. "No, I can't say he does." She agreed. "Hey, Mitarashi? You know if one is allowed to smoke here?" Naruto questioned. Anko raised an eyebrow.

"Yet another bad habit?" She chuckled. "It's allowed." She added. Sasuke huffed, setting down his empty cup of sake. "He doesn't see it as a bad habit, considering the fact it doesn't hurt him. The Kyuubi cleans it all up." He complained.

Anko raised an eyebrow. "You know of it?" She said, surprised. Sakura and Sasuke nodded. "We know everything about each others. I daresay we're quite complicated." Sakura waved her hand airily, and glared at Naruto when he blew a ring of smoke towards her.

"You bet we are. Say, Mitarashi, you're a real cool jonin. Would you mind training us while we're suspended? Kakashi probably suspects us to sit at home doing nothing."

Anko tilted her head. "You know, I like you, so I only have one thing you must follow in that case. Never EVER call me sensei!" She hissed. All three nodded, and she grinned. "Good. Then meet up at training ground 44 in the morning. You'll get training if you come, and if you don't, well, then I'll just have to find something else to do."

"Yay!" Sakura exclaimed happily. Naruto breathed out some smoke with a satisfied look, and Sasuke smirked. "Thank ye for yer offer, we all appreciate it." He said. Anko laughed, very amused at their changing behaviors and left.

"Well now, this might turn out interesting." Naruto chuckled. Sasuke and Sakura nodded. "Very much so." Sakura smiled.

Over at the disk, Yoru chuckled at the strange trio of genin.

XXX

Next day, Anko was lounging at the fence to one of Konoha's largest and most dangerous training grounds, looking after the trio.

"Do we have an accord?"

"Aye, we have an accord."

Anko turned; slightly shocked at seeing the trio stand beside her shaking hands. "Seems you have some skills with stealth, after all." She commented. Naruto looked up through black sunglasses. "Of course. Now what'll you teach us today?" He wondered, looking like a pleading puppy.

Anko leapt down from the fence to stand in front of them. "First things first. Get new clothes. Second, find me in the forest when you come back!" She grinned, and leapt inside. The trio looked at each other and dashed back to the Uchiha compound.

XXX

The trio arrived at the fence again, now in new clothing.

Naruto wore a black t-shirt with fishnet sleeves to slightly above his elbows, dark crimson combat pants with many pockets and black combat boots. He also had black, finger-less gloves, and his blue headband had been turned black with long ends.

Sakura wore a long-sleeved, loose white shirt with a black vest over, a short black skirt with slits up the sides, white training shorts underneath, black boots with many buckles, and her headband had turned black as well. Her long hair had been put in a messy bun.

Sasuke wore a dark white t-shirt with black fishnet sleeves to his elbows, dark blue shinobi pants, a thin chain on each hip, near knee-high shinobi sandals and no headband, but the metal plate fastened to one of the chains. His bangs were allowed to fall down his forehead.

As one, all three dashed into the trees, landing only a little ways from the fence.

"Well, we have already formulated a plan, haven't we?"

"Aye, Captain."

"No ship here, no captain."

"Eh, let him call me whatever he wants. I think he liked being a pirate too much. I smell Mitarashi in that direction." Naruto pointed into the trees, and they leapt up into the trees, beginning to tree jump.

"She's hidden her scent well." Naruto remarked as he span around to get a speed boost. "With your nose, that shouldn't be a problem." Sasuke said with a pointed look. Naruto grinned. "Nope! It's not far now." He hushed his teammates, and they sprung into a clearing where Anko was standing.

Sasuke dodged the snakes she sent at him, attacked her, but halfway through the attack pulled back and disappeared into the trees again. Then Sakura came from the other side, kicking the ground. The ground cracked up, creating a huge crater.

Anko leapt into the air, tossing a few kunai after the pink-haired girl. Then she span around to dodge a cutting wind, originating from a small black fan Naruto held.

"You have to do better than that!" She yelled, grinning. Naruto tilted his head and nodded to his two teammates. Sakura and Sasuke charged at the same time from two different directions, while the blonde pulled a cigarette from his pocket and lit it.

"You can't relax in the middle of a fight!" Anko chastised, charging towards the boy, who blew a cloud of smoke at her.

"…Huh?" Anko uttered, hanging still in mid-air. Around her was the smoke Naruto blew, shifting yet stable. Naruto grinned triumphant. "Don't forget that everything can be a weapon! I'm merely manipulating the smoke with my chakra." He explained.

"Good job, Captain!"

"Still not captain."

"Shut yer mouth."

"Enough already!" Naruto yelled, blowing smoke on his two teammates and manipulating it to hit them on their heads.

"So, did we pass this impulsive test, Mitarashi?" He asked, waving his fan idly. Anko blinked. "Put me down. And yes, I'd say so. You're surprisingly good at teamwork considering the rumors of being the worst genin team this year. And you have a clear leader, that's good too." She complimented.

Naruto siphoned his chakra away from the smoke, and Anko landed on the forest floor silently.

"So, what'll we be learning?" Sakura asked curiously. Anko tilted her head. "Well, you've got teamwork pretty well down so far…so individual skills it is!" She grinned.

Sasuke smirked. "Already you're proving to be a better teacher than Kakashi. He'd have us do chakra exercises, teamwork training, and more chakra exercises." He sighed dramatically.

"He would? Wow, even worse than I thought. Anyway, tell me your skills, just a summary." The purple-haired jonin demanded. Naruto nodded. "Well, I have Kage Bunshin and it's various relatives, manipulation of air and unstable matter in air, chakra strings, chakra shaping, sealing skills, jinchuuriki cloak, etc. I really can't remember everything."

"I've got Kage Bunshin, extreme strength, chakra shaping, very few sealing skills, medic jutsu including the destroying version of the chakra scalpel, and not really much else. I'm good at building ships though." Sakura noted.

"I have a vast amount of fire jutsu, a couple water jutsu, and many others, chakra strings, Kage Bunshin and Bunshin Bakuha, chakra scalpel, chakra manipulation, sharinghan, false jinchuuriki cloak, and so on." Sasuke ticked off at his fingers.

Anko blinked. "And you're genin? I'd have thought you to be chuunin, the least! Naruto; what's chakra shaping? Sakura; what kind of ships? Sasuke; false jinchuuriki cloak?" She questioned.

Naruto nodded with a smile. "Chakra shaping is mostly a control exercise, but it can be used for intimidation as well. It consists of molding your chakra outside of your body into a shape. It can be a ball, or if you're good at it, animals and such." He explained to the somewhat awed jonin.

Sakura tilted her head. "I can build a galleon. Though it takes some time." She said. Anko nodded and looked at Sasuke who looked transfixed at a blue butterfly flying by.

"…Oh! The false jinchuuriki cloak is something Naruto and I developed. Because of some trouble, he infused me with some of the Kyuubi's chakra, using a sealing filter to purify it slightly as not to harm me. In the end I got about one tail of chakra, which I can pull out to get a jinchuuriki cloak like Naruto. Though he can go more than one tail."

Anko's eyes were wide as she listened to the explanation. "Are you sure you guys are Team Kakashi?" She questioned incredulously. Naruto nodded. "Pretty much. Though we prefer the term Team 7 or Team We're-more-amazing-than-you'll-ever-be." He explained.

Anko got a deadpanned look.

"You think we broke her?"

"Nah, she's cool."

"Yeah, but even cool people can break."

"Not Mitarashi. She's even more than cool, she's awesome."

"Mm…you're right. Hey, who wants lunch?"

"ME!"

XXX

The trio and Anko sat at Ichiraku's, eating, of course, ramen.

"That's impossible Ino. You probably dreamt it all." A drawling voice sighed, and they turned to see team 10 come walking. "I didn't dream it! Everyone else saw it too!" The girl of the team claimed.

"Saw what?" Sakura asked. "That Sasuke acted weirdly!" Ino answered, and then span around in shock to look at the three of them sitting there. "Can't I act how I want?" Sasuke demanded, raising an eyebrow.

Shikamaru frowned as he looked at them. "Where's Kakashi? And aren't you supposed to have missions now at this time?" He asked, subtly studying their changes.

"Oh, Kakashi is probably trying to get another team or something. And we're suspended from active duty, so we found another, more awesome teacher!" Naruto explained, gesturing to Anko, who waved lazily.

"Suspended?" Choji wondered. "Aye. We weren't allowed to blow up cats." Sasuke nodded sadly. Ino gestured wildly towards him. "See, Shikamaru!" She exclaimed. The pony-tailed boy narrowed his eyes. "Are you really Team 7?" He demanded.

All three of them burst into laughter. "Wow! We got Shikamaru suspicious on us!" Sakura chuckled. "What do we do, Captain?" Sasuke questioned with a smirk. Naruto got a thoughtful look. "Aye, it seems we have a real problem here. I'd say we do…nothing! Cuz really, since when did we care about other's opinions?"

Team 10 looked absolutely shocked, while Anko was snickering, and Teuchi and Ayame Ichiraku looked confused.

"Sorry, Team 10, but we have to go. Au revoir." Naruto stood up, bowed, and lit a cigarette. Sasuke and Sakura did dramatical bows for themselves and then all three disappeared in a cloud of dark blue smoke.

Anko laughed at Team 10's astounded looks. "Yeah, they're not among the most normal, but they're definitively the most funny ones!" She said, and was gone in a cloud of normal smoke.

"…Oh no, Naruto have made Sakura and that jonin crazy too!" Ino screamed. She was silenced when Shikamaru actually bopped her on the head. "He haven't made them like that…they're all like that. It's…natural; didn't you feel it? Something's up with those three…"

"Huh?"

XXX

So? I must admit I got the idea from another fic, but it was so awesome, so I wanted to make a story like that too! ...Unfortunately, I don't remember the name. It's on my fav list though.

Please review!