Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, or Zoolander. I do own this story though.

Little Green Baby

BPOV

"I don't know why you two don't just fuck and get it over with," said Rose, eyeing the menu like a ravenous lion. I could almost hear her mouth watering from across the table as she salivated over the pasta dishes.

Riley nodded, stirring his ice water with a straw. "She's right, you know. Look at you, you're about to jump the next guy who speaks to you."

"He doesn't have to talk," I argued. "He just needs to have a cock and be willing to fuck a fat, pregnant woman."

At the turn of twenty-two weeks my hormones were still in overdrive. Occasional fits of crying would turn into rage-induced tantrums over something as simple as the store being out of my favorite brand of gum. My midsection had popped outwards all of a sudden - what was once a small bump was now a smooth round balloon that poked out just over the top of my jeans. Nothing I owned disguised it, or the resulting weight I'd gained around my hips, which meant that there was no hiding it now. Everyone at work knew, the neighbors knew, people passing by on the street knew. And because of this, it seemed like everyone's respect for my personal space flew out the window. Random strangers were stopping to rub my bump in coffee shops; patients at work would hug me and congratulate me by touching my stomach. The idea of getting a huge t-shirt with the words 'Fuck Off' printed on the front was becoming more and more appealing every day.

The miracle of childbirth? It was a miracle I hadn't killed someone yet.

As well as the weight gain and severe emotional issues, my milk aversion had morphed into a dislike for anything remotely creamy or dairy based. And the worst thing was, I was craving a chocolate milkshake like a fucking drug addict, but every time I brought the milk to my mouth, my stomach rolled and I almost vomited. On the flip side, I'd discovered a fondness for anything fatty or salty - preferably both. Fries were a big favorite, and onion rings. Oh, and chicken strips. Oh, fuck, and the spring rolls from the Chinese take-out down the block from our place. I'm pretty sure Edward was on a first name basis with the guy who owned the place.

My penchant for anything salty had made visiting Esme happy, since she liked to put salt on every-fucking-thing. She was just happy that I wasn't craving anything weird since apparently Alice liked to gnaw on raw potato when she was pregnant with Lashawn, and rubber when she was pregnant with Janetta.

Since our first meeting, Esme and Carlisle had visited fairly regularly. I was sure Esme couldn't get any more tanned, but every time they showed up she was an even brighter shade of orange. As strange to look at as she was, it was nice to have a motherly figure around who wasn't going on about the benefits of fennel and licorice root for my heartburn. I didn't have the heart to tell Sue it wasn't the baby giving me heartburn; it was the deep-fried pickles I was ingesting by the fistful.

But worst of all, and by far the most frustrating side effect of my pregnancy, was that I was constantly turned on. From the minute I woke up beside Edward, with the female equivalent of morning wood, I was a walking, talking, ball of sexual need. Just the slightest sexual innuendo from him had me clenching my thighs together. He couldn't even say the word 'hard' without making my insides quiver.

"So you and Edward still haven't…" Riley made a crude gesture with his hands.

"What, Riley? Have we fucked? Has Edward banged me yet? Am I getting cock on the regular?"

Rosalie smiled apologetically as a mother at a nearby table cupped her hands over her child's ears, scowling at me.

"No," I hissed quietly. "Edward still has this thing about our first time being special," I said with a pout.

Riley held his hands up in defense. "Okay, Miss Cranky Pants. Geez."

Rose snorted, waving the waitress over. "Sounds a bit fruity to me. Are you sure Edward isn't gay?"

I shook my head vehemently. "Having been there, and most definitely done that, I can vouch for Edwards's heterosexuality. That guy knows his way around a woman's body like a fat kid in a bakery."

"Aw, you got a taste and now you're a little Edward-whore?" Riley said, pouting dramatically at me.

At first the idea of being "wooed," as Edward put it, was kind of romantic. I'd never been actively pursued, let alone wooed. I figured it would be a date or two, some groping in the back of a cinema, maybe a blow job or two and then hours of sweaty animal sex.

Apparently, I was wrong.

Flowers and movies there was. Blow jobs and sweaty animal sex – there was not.

I rubbed a hand across my belly as little bubbles of movement rippled under my skin; like a hundred butterflies dancing inside my abdomen. The first time it happened, I thought it was just gas, like a rumble in my stomach. But when it moved across the breadth of my belly, I realized it was the baby, not a fart. Edward tried to feel it, pressing his hand to my stomach for hours on end, but I guess it was too soft. The twenty-two week scan was going to be the first time either of us had gotten a good look at the baby, and we were both nervous and excited at the same time. Edward had spent hours reading up about the procedure the night before, telling me all about the scans and measurements the doctor would take. He was so hot when he was being smart and shit.

Luckily, the clinic was only a short walk from the restaurant; and it wasn't like my ever-expanding ass couldn't use the walk anyway. The late October breeze kept me cool as I strolled past stores with Halloween decorations in the windows; oranges and reds reflected back at me from inside and out as the leaves on the trees lining the streets began to change.

As I turned the corner, ready to cross the road, my gaze traveled up the street and excitement buzzed through me as I caught sight of a tall, really, really, ridiculously good looking man standing awkwardly outside the health clinic. Dressed in an impeccable charcoal suit, with his trademark shiny shoes and bronze hair gelled within an inch of its life, was Edward. Knowing he was waiting for me sent a wave of pride through my body.

Great, now I'm possessive and horny.

Typing furiously on his iPhone, he hadn't seen me approach, affording me some time to give him a thorough eye fuck.

I watched as a tall blonde with legs for days and tits the size of my head, walked past him, her hips swaying side to side like a supermodel. Fuck, even I looked at her ass as she walked by. But not Edward. Not my completely clueless, socially inept, baby daddy. It wasn't until I called his name as I approached that he looked up, a smile bright as the sun appearing on his face.

"How was lunch?" he asked, tucking his phone into his jacket pocket.

"Good. I ate too much."

"So normal then?"

I rolled my eyes, but smiled as Edward placed his hand on my elbow, ushering me inside the clinic.

After more deliberation and arguments on Edward's side, we'd finally found an OB/GYN who fit his strict criteria. Maggie Maguire was a six-foot redhead with a thick Irish accent, shoulders like a weightlifter, and hands the size of dinner plates. She frightened the ever-loving crap out of me, but Edward thought she was perfect.

Under strict instructions from Maggie, I'd guzzled almost a liter of water, so by the time we arrived and got into the exam room, I was absolutely busting to pee. Squeezing my legs together, I tried to resist the urge to jump off the table and sprint to the bathroom.

Edward sat quietly beside me, looking at all the posters of uteruses on the wall.

"Can you talk to me, please? Distract me so I don't piss all over the exam bed."

Tearing his eyes away from the apparently fascinating female reproductive system, Edward looked up at me from beside the bed. "Uh, so do you want to find out the sex?"

Trying to squeeze my useless pelvic floor muscles, I shrugged. "I hadn't thought about it. I'll leave it up to you, I guess."

"Me?" he squeaked. "No, no. You have to tell me what you want to do, Bella. What if I say yes and we find out, but you get upset when it's not a surprise?"

"I won't."

"Or what if we don't find out, and then we can't decide between pink wallpaper and blue?"

"We can get yellow. For fuck's sake, Edward, it's not rocket science."

The combination of hormones and my extreme need to pee had me on edge, the pressure in my bladder beginning to become painful as we squabbled about the pros and cons of finding out the sex of the baby.

"I swear to God, if this bitch doesn't show up soon, I will cut someone."

Edward inched back a little in his seat, giving me a little breathing room.

Luckily for Dr Maguire and her exam bed, she breezed in the door moments later, my file in hand.

"Hey, guys!" she boomed, clamping a paw on Edward's shoulder. "You ready to see your baby?"

Both he and I nodded, and Maggie got to work getting everything ready. "You two picked out any names yet?" she asked, snapping a pair of latex gloves over her paw-sized hands.

Edward and I looked at each other. Names were a big step. Apart from the tests that had shown us I was having a baby, we hadn't even seen the thing, let alone think of a name for it.

"Not yet," I answered quietly.

"Oh well, you've got plenty of time for that. There are so many strange names around at the moment. One woman called her child Journey the other week. Journey! You know she's just destined to be—"

"Can we just get on with this please?" I interrupted, suppressing the urge to hold myself before I leaked pee everywhere.

"Right, right," Maggie said, taking a seat at the side of the bed. "Let's take a look then."

Edward and I both watched in rapt fascination as she squirted a big gob of clear gel onto my abdomen.

"Fuck that's cold," I yelped, pursing my lips as she then proceeded to push a hand-held device against the gel, making my urge to void even worse.

After a moment of swirling the thingy over my belly, a quiet whomp-whomp began echoing from the monitor.

"There's the heartbeat," said Maggie, smiling as she moved the hand piece around some more.

I was surprised she couldn't pick up my own heartbeat it was thumping so hard. When Edward's hand found mine, it just got worse, and then before I could stop them, tears filled my eyes, the quiet flutter of the baby's heart the only sound in the room as both Edward and I stared at each other.

"That's its heartbeat?" asked Edward, looking just as astounded as he squinted at the screen. "It's so fast," he whispered.

I sniffled a little, dumbfounded that something so simple could evoke such a visceral reaction in me. Shifting his chair as close as it could be, Edward pulled my hand into both of his, squeezing gently. He looked about as awestruck as I felt, his green eyes bright as he smiled up at me.

"And there we go," said Maggie, interrupting the quiet. "We've got some hands, and look – there's its head."

My head whipped around and Edward practically launched himself over the bed to get a closer look.

There it was.

A baby.

Maybe not a perfect rendering of a baby, but nevertheless, tinted green from the scan I could still see its head and one of its hands.

"Oh my God."

Suddenly, the pressing urge to pee disappeared, and all I was left with was an overwhelming sense of reality. There, moving inside of me, with its own heartbeat, with ten tiny toes and fingers, was my baby.

Our baby.

I turned to Edward, loath to take my eyes off the screen for anything else. "That's our baby."

Wide-eyed and slack-jawed, Edward nodded, his eyes locked on the monitor.

The tears I'd tried to keep at bay spilled over as he smiled; his whole face alight with wonder. "Hey, baby," he said quietly.

Moving my hand up to the little strip of skin that wasn't covered in gel, I pressed my hand against my belly, closing my eyes as I listened to the heartbeat echo around me.

When Edward pressed his lips to my forehead, I just continued to cry, looking up at him as he gazed down at me.

"We're having a baby," he whispered against my skin, his hand cradling my cheek as his thumb brushed the tears from beneath my eyes.

Touching my hand to his, I sniffled, smiling, completely lost for words. Maggie spent some time pointing out a few other body parts; its feet and the length of its toes, its hand - with what she said were going to be long fingers. She even measured the space between the eyes, and how long its legs and arms were. The whole time Edward and I sat, staring in rapture at the little green baby on the screen.

"You two want to know the sex?"

Edward looked at me and I just shrugged gently, keeping a hold of his hand as it moved from my cheek. "Whatever you want."

Taking a deep breath, he shook his head. "I think a surprise would be nice."

He looked to me, his brows lifting in question, and I nodded in approval, unable to wipe the stupid grin off my face. After a few more moments of watching the baby, and listening to its heartbeat, Maggie cleaned the goop off my skin and handed us a bunch of photos.

"You're doing perfectly, Bella," said Maggie, snapping my file closed. "Your blood pressure is excellent, glucose levels are perfect – everything's just great. See Emily at the front desk and she'll make an appointment for two weeks, just for another check up, okay?"

Fully clothed and in a bit of a daze, I peed for what felt like an eternity, and then made my way out to a waiting Edward, who had been good enough to make the next couple of appointments for me. Even though it was the middle of the day, Edward drove me all the way home, apparently happy to take the time to do so. I think we spent the entire trip beaming like idiots. Once home, I pinned the photo up on the fridge and we stood back, looking at the little green baby. Edward draped an arm over my shoulder, his warm hand rubbing my shoulder as I sighed contentedly.

"Do you wonder what he'll look like when he comes out?"

Edward frowned, looking between me and the picture. "He?"

I nodded.

"What makes you think it's a he, Bella?"

Snorting, I crossed my arms over my chest. "Edward, come on." I gestured to the picture. "Obviously it's a boy."

Squinting his eyes, Edward leaned in closer, tilting his head as he looked at the photo. "How on earth can you tell?"

"You can totally see his thing!"

Edward's head whipped around. "His thing?"

"You know," I rolled my eyes. "His pee-pee."

A crease appeared between Edward's brows as he looked at me. "His pee-pee? What are you, six? You've been spending too much time with Janetta."

As he looked back at the picture my heart swelled at his words. He was giving me snarky back-chat. How far he'd come from the anal-retentive, highly-strung Edward I'd first met.

"Where?" he asked, pulling the picture from the fridge and handing it to me. "Where's his pee-pee?"

"Right there," I answered, pointing to the picture.

Edward's laugh was loud, echoing through the empty house. "Bella, that's an arm."

Grabbing the picture, I looked again. "No way!"

"Yes way!"

My finger rapped against the shiny photo paper. "That is SO not an arm. It's a boy, and that's his little wang!"

"Bella," giggled Edward, his cheeks pink from laughing. "Unless he's going to be born the most well endowed kid on earth, that's an arm. See?"

Pointing out the features, I found Edward was right; it was an arm.

"Okay, smart ass," I conceded. "Seriously though, we need to start thinking about names and stuff."

Edward nodded, stepping forward to place an open hand on my stomach. No matter how many times he did it, my heart still beat a mile-a-minute when he touched me, and this was no exception.

"We can have a look through the baby names book when I get home tonight," he said, his body so close to mine I could feel his breath wash over my cheek.

The air around us seemed to hum as he reached down to pluck the photo from my fingers. Looking at it one more time, he slid it onto the bench.

There's always that moment right before you kiss, where your heart leaps into your throat and your palms begin to sweat. After a while I guess that feeling goes away, and a kiss is just a kiss. I hoped I never ever got to that stage, that the strange surge of nerves I got right before Edward kissed me never abated.

His kisses still left me weak-kneed, a little breathless and, of course, after months of pent-up sexual tension between us, more than a little worked up. When I wrapped my fingers around the silky material of his tie, pulling him closer, Edward whimpered quietly, and all of a sudden I found myself being lifted onto the kitchen bench. I gasped as his lips found my neck, his kisses hard and needy against my skin. Gripping his tie in my fist, I urged him closer, desperate to feel some kind of relief.

He groaned again as I palmed him through his slacks, the thin material doing nothing to hide the erection straining against his boxers. Sliding my hands up his broad chest and into his hair, I pulled his lips to mine again, using the opportunity to rough his bronze hair up, setting it free of its over-gelled confines. Edward whimpered quietly, his mouth opening for me as I kissed him deeper, trying to show him how much I wanted him with just a kiss.

I waited for him to pull away like usual, to take step back and put distance between us like he always did. But when I tightened my fingers in the short hair at the nape of his neck, he pressed forward into my hand, breathing unsteadily, and I knew this time wouldn't be like the others. My skin prickled as his hand moved up my bare thigh and under the hem of my dress, and I thanked my lucky fucking stars that I'd chosen to wear the long-sleeved dress as opposed to my jeans. Pulling me forward until I was perched on the edge of the counter, Edward brushed the back of his fingers against my underwear, the too-gentle movement sending sparks of desire shooting through me.

An unsteady breath hissed through Edward's teeth. "Oh, God." I knew he could feel how wet I was. God, even I could feel it as I pulsed and throbbed, aching for him to do something to relieve the tension.

His hand pulled at my underwear roughly, letting them slide over my hips and down my legs, where they slipped from my ankles to the floor between his legs. My back arched and my legs clamped around his hips as he touched me, his fingers coated in my desire for him, and his cock pressed against my thigh, hot and hard for me.

When he pressed two fingers inside of me I thought I would explode, and when he pulled them out, circling them around my clit, I almost screamed, I was so fucking on edge.

Reaching for his belt, I kissed the soft skin under his jaw as he continued to tease me.

In, out, swirl.

In, out, swirl.

"Edward," I groaned, pulling the thick leather material through the metal buckle. "Please, just fuck me. Please," I practically begged, trying to undo the button on his pants as he continued to torture me with his fingers. I knew it wasn't a ladylike thing to beg, but I was beyond caring.

Resting his head on my shoulder, I could feel him trying to compose himself, trying to rein in his own desire.

But I was having none of it.

Freeing him from his boxers, I wrapped a hand around him, moving my hand up his length once.

"Bella," he groaned, his fingers missing a beat as I repeated the action, swirling my thumb over the slick head of his cock.

"Just do it," I whispered, squeezing gently. "Fuck me."

"Jesus, Bella." When he looked up at me, his startling green eyes meeting mine, I'd expected to see conflict raging there, but was startled to see nothing but heavy-lidded lust. With his bottom lip between his teeth, he watched as I gripped him tightly again, his eyes slipping closed for a moment as I positioned the head of his cock right where I wanted him, where I was aching and wet and so fucking ready for him to have me.

With his hands on either side of my hips, practically crumbling the granite bench top in his grip, Edward pushed forward slowly.

"Shhiiiit," I moaned, my arms wobbling as I tried to keep them wrapped around his neck.

I remembered Edward being good. But I did not remember him being this good. It was like everything had become tighter under the weight of the baby, and I could feel every single fucking inch of him filling me. And when Edward's mouth fell open, his bottom jaw slack as he panted, his eyes locked on where we were joined, I knew it felt different for him too.

Lowering me onto my back gently, Edward pulled my dress up, bunching it around my waist as he gripped my hips. My head rolled to the side as he unbuttoned the top three buttons of his shirt, his tie already hanging loose around his neck.

"Wait, wait a second," I whispered, sitting up and shimmying off the bench. I sighed as the heavy weight was lifted from my lower back and hips, and my dress fell around my thighs again as I turned around, repositioning myself over the bench top, my ass pressed against his dick.

Warm hands slid up the back of my thighs, and leaning forward to kiss the spot beside my ear, Edward rolled his hips against my ass, and I could feel his smile against my skin as every muscle in my body tightened at his touch. His fingers slid up the outside of my thighs gently taking my dress with them as I bent forward, my chest almost flush with the cold granite.

Grabbing the ultrasound picture from beside me, I turned it face-down, my fingers almost tearing it in two as Edward pushed into me from behind, his hands firm on my hips, his thumbs pressed against my lower back.

As his hands slid up my back and down again, gripping my waist, I couldn't help but echo his movements, meeting Edward's thrusts with my own. When he gripped my hips tightly and began to snap his hips against mine, the movement making my hands squeak against the granite bench top, I couldn't stop the almost-scream that tumbled out of my mouth.

Never slowing his pace, Edward ran the tips of his fingers across his tongue and slid them between my legs, pressing against my most sensitive spot.

"Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck." With every punishing roll of Edward's hips against mine, the heat at my center began to expand. Seconds later, I was practically chanting Edward's name as the combination of his fingers and the angle of his hips sent wave after wave of my orgasm crashing over me, spreading warmth throughout my whole body, making my muscles twitch and clench.

His hair wild, and his eyes ablaze, Edward looked almost feral as he stood behind me, his hips driving into me at a punishing pace as he came crashing after me, his breath warm on my back as he buried himself in me one last time.

Panting and wobbly-legged, Edward stayed resting against me as we both caught our breaths, his weight on his arms as he tried not to press against me too hard.

"Well, that escalated quickly," I said, breaking the silence.

Edward lifted his head, pressing a kiss to the dip between my shoulder blades.

"That wasn't really how I planned on doing that."

I shrugged, feeling him slip out of me. "It was still pretty fucking okay with me."

"Oh, god," he said suddenly, his eyes popping open as he held his softened cock in his hand. "I didn't wear a condom!"

Standing up, I pulled my dress down to cover myself up again. "I think it's a little late to worry about that, don't you?"

Tucking himself away, Edward grinned sheepishly, picking my underwear up off the floor. "Good point. It's not like you can get any more pregnant, is it?"

I giggled, wriggling my underwear back on. "Nope."

Bits and pieces tucked away, and suit jacket back in place, Edward leaned in to kiss me softly on the cheek, his expression still soft and post-coital blissed-out. "I'll see you tonight?"

"I'll be here."

I waited until his car drove past the front window before erupting into a victory dance. If my vagina could have high-fived me, it would have. It would also have asked for an ice pack since it was a little out of practice, but whatever, the bitch was happy.

After triumphantly dancing around the house for a while, I scrubbed the kitchen bench thoroughly, and then decided to send a copy of the ultrasound to both Esme and Carlisle, and Sue and Charlie. God knows Charlie could use a little visual stimuli to warm to the idea of being a grandpa. And hopefully the photo would warm his heart enough to make him stop scaring the shit out of Edward every time he visited.

A week or so later, Janetta sat on the carpet in the living room, her crayons spread around her again, brows creased, and her little tongue poking out of the side of her mouth as she scribbled furiously, coloring perfectly inside the lines of her 'My Little Pony' picture.

"Who taught you to color inside the lines like that?"

To be honest, I don't think I could have done a better job.

"Uncle Edward."

I snorted loudly.

Figures. Only Edward would teach a child to keep the crayon inside the lines at all times. Anal bastard.

Since our afternoon tryst in the kitchen, Edward and I couldn't seem to get enough of each other. There was only one word for me, and that was insatiable. Whereas before I could only whine and bitch about being turned on, now I had the means to solve the problem, and a veritable sex-god attached to that means.

The pool house.

The bathroom in the pool house.

The laundry room.

His car.

Oh, god – his car. Yeah. That was a good one.

There wasn't a surface in the house we hadn't defiled.

"Are ponies' hairs blue or lallow?"

Shaking the lusty thoughts from my head, I looked down at the picture, taking in the neon green pony with red eyes and pink grass beneath it. "Blue. Definitely."

Selecting the dark blue, Janetta got to work. As weird as the kid could be sometimes, I was growing a little affinity for the girl. Sure, sometimes she smelled like boogers and had sticky fingers, but she knew all the words – albeit some wrong ones - to Bon Jovi's 'Livin' On A Prayer', and always ate my carrots at dinner so I didn't have to. If my kid turned out half as well-adjusted and kooky as Janetta, I'd be happy.

At the thought of the baby, I rubbed my hand across my little bump, a movement I'd made a habit of lately. And as I watched Netty color fastidiously between the lines of her picture, I almost jumped out of my seat as I felt a strong ripple of movement near my bellybutton.

"Oh my…fuuuu-goodness."

Janetta dropped the crayon, gasping. "Is the baby coming?"

"No, silly." I grabbed her hand and pressed it against my belly, her tiny pink-wax-smeared hand under mine. "Feel it?"

Her eyes bugged out of her head as she felt the baby kick against her hand. "Whassit doing?"

"It's saying, 'What's up?'"

Leaning forward, Netty cupped her hands around her mouth and pressed them to my stomach. "WHAT'S UP, BABY?!" she said loudly.

Laughing, I shook my head. "You're strange, kid, you know that?"

We both sat there for a little while, moving our hands over my stomach, trying to feel some more movement. After about three and a half minutes, Janetta got bored and went back to coloring.

After about six minutes I got bored too, and scooted over to the table beside Janetta. "So, crayons, huh?"

I picked up the waxy pencil, giving it a sniff. It smelled like the inside of my pencil case from third grade.

"Yup."

Choosing a blue and a pink crayon, I stuck them under my top lip, clapping my hands together like a walrus. There was nothing like embarrassing yourself to make a kid laugh. And Janetta's laugh was pretty cool, all girly and high-pitched, and the sound of it made me smile.

"Me!" she giggled, clapping her hands.

Copying my move with a little help, we both made walrus noises loudly until our faces were red from laughter.

"What are you doing to my niece?"

I looked up to see Edward standing behind us, watching intently.

"We're waruses, Uncle Edward. Wanna be a warus too?"

Edward shook his head, declining politely. "No thanks, baby. But you two go ahead."

"Wait!" I yelled, dropping the crayons and standing slowly. "I think the baby kicked."

Faster than I could blink, Edward was beside me, his hand on my stomach. "Where? Did it hurt? How long for?"

"I feeled it," said Janetta, still focused on her drawing.

"You did?" he asked, smiling. "Lucky you."

Unfortunately, the baby wasn't as forthcoming with Edward. And not just on that day either. By the end of the following week – week twenty-four – almost everyone in the house had felt the baby move but Edward. I could see that he was trying to be positive about it, but when Jasper felt it one night, shit hit the fan.

"Jasper felt it?" he yelled, a little red across the cheeks as he fumed.

"He was right there, and the baby moved. What was I going to say? No? I can't make it move, Edward."

"Can't you try? Think about it moving or something." He poked at the side of my belly gently. "Hey in there. Give me something, please?"

We both waited with bated breath for something to happen. But of course it didn't.

But, with only twelve weeks to go, I had no doubt Edward would feel something soon. Especially since he had all but moved into the guesthouse with me.

"You don't think it's weird that you're living in the guesthouse of your own house?" I asked one morning, as we lay naked in bed after a very rousing Sunday morning wakeup session.

Edward shrugged. "Not really. And who knows what's going on with Alice and Jasper these days."

I sat up in bed. "What do you mean?"

"I heard Alice telling mom that she's stalling the divorce papers."

"Oh. Why? All they do is fight."

Toying with the ends of my hair, Edward nodded. "Yeah, but that's the way they are. I wouldn't be surprised if they're back together by Christmas."

"You mean we could have the house to ourselves?"

A smile lifted Edward's mouth at one side. "Maybe."

Resting my head on Edward's chest again, I made it my mission to make sure Alice and Jasper gave their marriage a second try.

Endless thank-you's to Krystle and to Alby for sticking out the wait between chapters. And to all those of you still reading. Not long to go now! Baby OCDWard is on its way!

Thank you xx Wink