That was eight years ago.

Eight long years ago, I met and married the most incredible man to ever walk the face of the earth. My body and face have now morphed into something much older, much more mature as far as physical standards got. No longer a teenager, I was now an adult, able to live on my own in the real, outside world. But I'd never forget.

I turned twenty six years old about a week ago. For some reason, as I sat in the middle of a pub with my friends and laughed my head off at my birthday celebration, I realized that I would have many, many more birthdays. Because I was alive, and I was enjoying living life.

Sometimes, I thought about Kurt. Kurt Hummel, the beautiful boy who stole my heart eight years ago. To be honest, those feelings haven't died down. I know that I'm supposed to move on. I'm supposed to find a new partner, required to get re-married so I won't be considered lonely. But I'm not lonely. And as easy as it sounds sometimes, you never forget your first love. Some people can fall in love over and over again. Some people, like me, cannot. I found who I was in love with, and everyday I think about Kurt.

I still live in Lima, but one day I'd really love to move to a city, hopefully somewhere big and noisy where Kurt wanted to go. I visit the Hummel-Hudson residence during the holidays and when I have free time. They're doing lovely, by the way. Burt and Carole Hummel, still living in that house that I used to go to almost everyday eight years ago. And I still love everything about that house, because I had very good memories inside of it. Burt isn't frustrated or angry at the world anymore for taking Kurt away. He learned to adapt to life without his son, just as I have learned to adapt to the world without Kurt in it.

I never hated anyone, though. I never blamed anyone or anything for Kurt's death. Kurt always told me never to do that. You may think that I'm being a complete stalker right now, some creepy man that sits in his house all day and rocks back and forth with a picture of his deceased husband clutched in his hands. No, actually, that's not who I am. I get out plenty. I spend time with my friends and family, sometimes even calling up some of the member from the New Directions. I still love them, because during that time of pain and suffering, they were there for me. They easily accepted me as Kurt's boyfriend, and later his husband.

I do, however, get sad sometimes. When I think about those ocean blue eyes, the soft smile and tousled hair, his long eyelashes and gentle laugh, his beautiful singing voice...I do miss him. Sometimes at night, I roll over on my bed and look at the empty space next to it, reaching my hand over and imagining Kurt lying there. I release a few tears now and then, sometimes the heavy sobs come and hit me out of nowhere.

I still have Kurt's letter. It's still sitting in the same red envelope, tucked safely away in my drawers. In my cupboards our glass wedding mugs that the New Directions made for us. And I use the scarves that David, Wes, Nick and Jeff gave me. I am able to live my life without Kurt near me 24/7. I'm not a sad, miserable, angry man who hates the world and wants to end his life. I love my life very much. I cherish it, and I live my life to the fullest in honor of the one person I ever loved, who could not live his own. I am happy, joyful, and treat everyday like my last. Kurt taught me that. He taught me to live my dreams and not be so afraid to live outside my box. I promised him that I would someday pursue my dreams as a musician, and I did. It's because of him that I write songs on my keyboard and guitar. It's because of him that I perform them at local coffee shops and restaurants. It's because of him that I'm doing my best to live my dreams. Don't get me wrong. Kurt isn't the only reason the way I am today, however, without his help, I probably would have shoved those dreams and thoughts away to the back of my mind. I would've done something boring, like working behind a desk or typing away at a computer.

Kurt Hummel saved my life. He changed me in many ways, some ways I didn't even think were possible. Every night, before I close my eyes and dream, I think of Kurt's angelic face, his body, his personality. I hear his words whispering at the back of my mind the lyrics to only hope. I hear him giggling sweetly, telling me that he loves me. I want to tell him that I love him too, so much, always and forever. When I visit Kurt's grave, now covered with small flowers and grass, I talk to him about me, my life, and how much I miss him. I'd just sit for hour and hours sometimes in the grass, talking to him. I knew he was listening. Whenever I'm there, at his grave, it's like I can feel him next to me, in front of me. Once, I even fell asleep underneath a tree at the cemetery, just lightly snoring and snoozing away in the summer breeze. That probably sounds a little creepy. I don't care what anyone thinks about me. I love my husband, and I always will.

To be honest, I did try and take Kurt's words in his letter. I tried going out with other men, and they were great. But going on dates with them, becoming something more than friends with them...I couldn't do it. Kurt's face would always come to my mind, and there was no way I'd do it. I felt like I was abandoning my vows to him. I promised to be with him forever, and I wanted to be. No one could compare to him. I just yearned to feel his lips moving against mine, to hold him in my arms, sleeping together under the stars. It felt like such a long time since I'd done that. He was my rock that held me down to the earth, he was my inspiration, he was my other half. And he aways would be, even if he no longer by my side anymore.

Life is a precious gift. No matter how harsh and bitchy it can get sometimes, it's valuable, something not everyone gets the chance at. Kurt, my husband, my sweetheart, never got that chance fully. His short eighteen years were nothing compared to what some people look at. He wasn't even a full-fledged adult before his gift was taken away from him. But I knew that I'd made him happy, or at least, I sure hoped so.

I feel him all the time. Whether if I'm taking a shower, washing dishes, messing around with my guitar or walking down the street, I'd just feel an overwhelming amount of happiness because I knew he was there, trying to communicate with him. I would always always answer.

What Kurt and I had and still have is special, a love that not everyone gets to experience. Kurt was mine, and I was his, and I knew that it was something worth fighting for, worth going to through all the pain and doing one hundred more times. Whenever I had dreams about him, I'd wake up smiling and chuckling to myself. I wondered where he was. Where do people go after they die? Up into the sky? Do they stay on earth in an invisible, silent form? Do they become reincarnated as parts of nature, in the form of a bird or a tree? Kurt was lost up in the sky somewhere, floating into a cloud of nothingness. But when he was with me, when I felt him around me, he was always safe in my memories and heart. I wonder what he looked like now. Did he look the same, the innocent face with delicate features? Or did he look like me now, much more mature and older?

It didn't matter. He could look any way he wanted or be anywhere he wanted, and I'd still love him no matter what. I look down at my wedding ring when I feel lonely, trace the glittery gems with my eyes and think of how Kurt put it there. Nothing is ever over. Even when it is, it goes on somewhere in another life. I'd been looking for someone like Kurt my whole life, even when I didn't realize it, and when I found him, my troubles flew away.

I know I'll see Kurt Hummel again one day. It'll be my time, and when it is, I'll drift upwards into wherever the after life takes me, and I'll walk into it acceptingly. Kurt will be there, his arms stretched wide open as I run into them and cling to him tightly. It's like my heart is tied to his with an unbreakable cord, and when we meet again, the cord will vanish because we won't need it anymore. We'd never have to leave each other's sides again. So no, if you're going to ask, I am not afraid of death, because I know something beautiful will be waiting for me when that time comes.

But as for now, I love my life, so I think I'll just live. For the both of us.

THE END.

Hi faithful readers, thank you so, so much for taking this incredible journey with me. It's been an absolute pleasure reading your comments and taking this story and turning it into my own. This story was more successful than my last, and I wanted to thank everyone who's shared their cancer stories with me. They touched my heart and I'm so glad I was able to write something that could connect with others, even if this story was an inspired idea. I'm going to New York to watch Darren Criss in H2$ in two days, but when I get back, I'll start my new story that I've been planning for a while now. Thanks again so much for reading! A Walk to Remember really is fantastic, so I'm gad I could include Kurt and Blaine in such a bittersweet tale such as this one. :)