~xxoxx~

Escaped

by Yui Shunrei Ryuzaki

Disclaimer applies.

Warning: Might contain scenes and themes not suitable for some readers.

~xxoxx~

Chapter 3: I won't give you up

~xxoxx~

I saw a glimpse of pain in her eyes as I watch her pack her things in her room. Her smile vanished and I somewhat felt guilty that I'm the cause of her distress. The bruise on her arm that she'd obtained when she blocked herself to defend me from our father's wrath still visible in her pale skin. What have I done to her? Rin was suffering because of me. Am I too selfish? To claim her as mine? To love her regardless of our blood bonds? Does love has boundaries? Does love knows blood relations? Rin loves me and I love her. I didn't mind what would others will feel and would say. I'm a shameless bastard who fell in love with my own sister. But Rin... Rin isn't like me. She's a respectful and kind person. She knows limitations and ethics nevertheless she shares this indecent love with me. Throwing away all her beliefs to be with me was enough for me to know that she loves me and chooses me over anything else.

She lifted her gaze and noticed my presence. Her eyes were lifeless. Her face was pale and it seemed that her strenght had left her. Slowly, she scrambled up from the floor and approached me. She tripped on her own foot and I saved her from her fall. I pushed her with me inside her room and closed the door.

"Rin." I heard my voice and pulled her in a tight embrace. Her sobs echoed within her silent room. What could I do to ease her pain? I cannot bear to see her in such state. It breaks my cold heart to see her crying. Should I let her go? Should I leave her alone to find love with someone else? I bit my lip and grimaced. I couldn't. I couldn't give her up to another man. But to give her a happy and normal life, I must. This would break our hearts but if Rin wouldn't stand before me, I'll save and protect her for the last time.

~xxoxx~

Sesshomaru must be struggling and is in pain by now. I could sense his guilt not for the reason that he loves me but to see me hurt by our love. This morality forbids our love. I cannot deny my feelings for my brother. I should've expect this to happen. Certainly, they wouldn't understand how Sesshomaru and I love each other in a romantic way. I couldn't blame them.

"Perhaps we should..." but I halted his words.

"Stop it.." I whispered.

"You know we should. I will always be there for you. You know all this, you've always known..."

"Stop," I said under my breath. "Don't say these things to me." and pushed away myself from his embrace. He gave me one of his rare worried look.

What a lie all this was, what a travesty. It was just the kind of exchange I had always detested, the kind of talk that I could never make myself. In my imaginations, I had never expected it to be like this. I never want to be parted from him. I never thought I would bawl when he said he was going. I never thought I would throw myself at his very feet just to make him stay beside me. We looked at each other for a long moment. My eyes might be tinged with red because of my tears. I felt my mouth quivering.

As if he'd lost his control, he went to me and held me in his arms like I'm a small, delicate child. I determined to not to let him go, no matter how he struggled. But he didn't struggle. I cried almost silently as if I couldn't make myself stop. But he didn't yield to me. I felt myself melting in his arms. He drew back. He stroked my hair with both his hands, leant forward and kissed me on the lips, and then moved away lightly and soundlessly.

"All right, Rin. As you wished." he said.

I shook my head. Words and words and many words unspoken. We couldn't give up this love easily without a fight. I hate this world. I hate this destiny, fate or what so ever that brought us as siblings. What would you do if the only one you ever loved is your own sibling? Should you give up on it? Would you fight for it? If it's wrong to love Sesshomaru with all of my heart and if it is a crime, perhaps I'm guilty. What am I suppose to do when all I want to do is to be free to tell the world how much I love him? But still... I couldn't deny my love for my parents. I saw our mother devastated as she discovered our immoral relationship. I could see how much she tried to save us from this damnation. It breaks my heart to see her pleading to us to stop this love that we have for each other. I'm torn between my love for our mother and my love for Sesshomaru.

Our father's case differs though. I knew well how much Sesshomaru despise him. Sesshomaru became cold and a passive person because of our father. He became used of his beatings when we were younger. I don't know why he is so mean to Sesshomaru. I cannot emphasize too much how disturbed I was by that. It seemed to stir something in me deep inside, something I couldn't fully grasp. Father left Mother with us when we were about ten years old and marry Izayoi, the woman who'd changed him. They have a son named InuYasha that seems kind to me but not in good terms with Sesshomaru. When he found out that we are in a relationship, he was so mad at Sesshomaru. He almost killed him but Sesshomaru didn't even flinch and showed any pain. He received all his wrath which I couldn't stand to see. He took all the blame, pain and punishment just to protect me.

"Do you think for a moment I don't acknowledge my own guilt? And in if you are the only one..." I said. He reached out for me as he drew near, but his fierce eyes settled on me and I let my hands drop back limp. "Do you think I would leave you alone?" I said.

He was smiling. A bitter smile. For a moment, I didn't believe my eyes as if I was being deceived.

"No, you would not, Rin. You would not." he said.

"Love holds me unto you." I said softly.

"Love?" he mused. "What do you mean by love? I believe in nothing." And then, as if he could see the pain in my face, he came closer again and put her hands on my cheek. He was cold, unsatisfied, as I was cold and unsatisfied too.

"That you take my love yet you take all the pain always,' I said to him. "Have you forgotten that we're wed..." But even as I said these words I felt my old conviction waver I felt that I was being tormented. I turned away from him.

"You would leave me for mother she told you to do so..."

"Never..." I said to him.

"You would leave me, and you would marry whoever man that father arranged for you to marry..."

"Never." I whispered but it was firm and strong. The door was locked. No one could witness this another stolen moment of ours. Only we could keep them away by rising as early as the light would let us. This night might be our last being together. I was forced to move out from mother's custody and to torn me away from him. I would stay with father with his new wife and InuYasha.

He made his way to my bed and sat on it. He turned to me and told me to come. I was then at his side. He buried his face in my hair. I wanted to beg for his forgiveness for the pain he is suffering because of me. And in truth, he was right we should stop, yet I love him, love him as always. He drew me closer to him and said: "Do you know what it was that you do to me over and over without ever speaking a word? Do you know what was the kernel of trance you've put in me so my eyes could only look at you, so that you could pull me as if my heart were on a string?"

He took a deep breath before kissing my forehead.

"You rendered me powerless." he added.

I held him tight, but my tears stood in my eyes. Life without him is like living in a lifeless, gray world. I love him and he loves me. We have each other and we wouldn't have anyone stand in the way.

Early the next morning, I left him. He let me go reluctantly, and I was troubled, deeply, by the expression in his eyes. Weakness was unknown to him, and yet I saw fear and something beaten as he let me go. They torn us apart but they cannot put an end to our love. We would stay with each other regardless of what they say.

~xxoxx~

Three months left before our graduation and I felt that we're losing our time. I haven't seen Rin for nine days since she left our home. I wonder how she is. I didn't even have a chance to give her a proper goodbye. During the time that we're not in school, I tried to call her several times. After some time, the operator informed me that her mobile was out of service. Maybe father had took her phone so she couldn't talk to me. It was just fortunate that we're so close in graduating in high school and they didn't have a chance to forcefully transfer her to other school. I've heard enough of their cruel words but then I'd already anticipated that it would happen.

"Takahashi-san, care to tell us what is the right answer to the problem?"

I turned my head and saw that my math teacher had disturbed my deep thoughts. What an impertinent insect.

"The answer is negative eighteen."

He continued the lesson without acknowledging my answer. Such a moronic idiot. I may have been distracted by Rin but he was fool to think that he could caught me off guard. I remember the talk I have with father last night. He wanted to send me to America after graduation. He didn't want me stay where I could find a way to reach out to Rin. As I look at mother, I knew she want it too. Want me to forget my feelings for Rin. Want us to go back and act like we're siblings.

"I know Rin wouldn't easily give you up. She's blinded by this 'disgusting' feelings she have for you. But you, Sesshomaru. You must let her go, if you really want the best for her sake." Father told me.

The best for her? What could be the best for her? Do they know what she really want? Do they know everything about her? To let her go and instead stay as her brother. Do they really think we could just easily turn our backs and act like there's nothing happened between us?

"I would not." I said.

"Stop being so rude and selfish, Sesshomaru! How could you ruin your sister's dreams and future with your lust!"

Lust? Lust! They thought that it was only carnal pleasure that I felt for Rin! No, it isn't. Yes, I only wanted her to be only mine. I want her. I'm very much attracted to her an attraction that can never understand by the others. It was not just what I wanted from her. I never knew what love is but I want Rin above the rest and if it's love that what I feel for her, I'm a slave of my heart.

"Sesshomaru, you must understand that this would be the best for you and to Rin. We couldn't change what happened but we would try to restore what is suppose to be." I heard mother's worried voice.

I clenched my fist in dismay. They want me to abandon Rin. But then should I ruin her dreams and future? Could I really take her away with me in damnation? I cannot... She was so kind and good to suffer such crap. Can Rin understand that I wasn't really for her and I'm not worthy to have her? Is there's no other way for us to be together forever? Regardless of what I want, they already arranged my departure after graduation. I didn't even realized that I was moving away from her again. Not until I saw her worried eyes from afar. She was so close yet I couldn't even move and it seemed it was tougher to reach her.

~xxoxx~

I wonder what happened. Why won't he talk to me. It's getting harder to see him these days. Did something wrong happened? A week left before our graduation and this would be the last day of classes. I would be attending Tokyo U very soon and yet Sesshomaru haven't told me any of his plans after he graduated. I'm terribly missing him and it's driving me crazy.

I checked the wall clock above the blackboard in front of the room. It would be a few minutes more before we would be left out for our lunch. I would have finally a chance to see him. My nose scrunched up. But what would I say to him? How should I talk to him? The bell finally rung, signaling the beginning of our lunchtime. I quickly gathered my notebook and pens in my bag and walked out of the room. I hoped to catch him alone,before anyone interfere us. By the time I reached the rooftop though, he was already there standing alone, staring at the far away horizon. His long white silvery hair sways into the midst of air. His amber cold eyes shine perfectly on the scenes. Sesshomaru gave me a small smile when he caught my eye.

"How are you, Rin?" he asked me nonchalantly, glancing briefly at me.

I shrugged. "Okay. I guess..."

He walked towards the door without looking back at me.

"Sesshomaru..." I called and he stopped on his tracks. He looked at me over his shoulder and said:

"Meet me after my meeting on student council room." and then left. I wonder why he was distructed. Didn't he love me anymore? I went back to my class with my worried thoughts for him. And then I overhead my classmates conversation.

"Haven't you noticed that Sesshomaru-sama's second button is already missing? Bet he'd already gave it to the girl he would like to marry." One of her girl classmates said and then giggled.

His second button had already lost. Did it mean that he's inlove with another girl? I trembled in pain. Am I too dense not to know that he didn't love me anymore? No. Maybe I'm just getting wrong.

~xxoxx~

She cautiously opened the door of the student council room. She could see that he was alone but it didn't hurt to be careful. His head shot up and gave her one of his alluring faint smile. She smiled sheepishly and took the seat beside him and placed her bag on the table.

"What happened to you? I'm so worried these past months. I didn't even have a chance to be with you."

"I'm perfectly fine, Rin." But she knew he wasn't. She could see it to his eyes that there's something wrong. They were silent for a moment until he broke it.

"You should probably heading home by now. Father might be looking for you." He wanted nothing but her to stay with him a little longer but he didn't want her to get in trouble again. She shook her head.

"I told him that I'm staying late in school for the last rehearsal of my songs for the graduation ceremony. He's not expecting me to come home earlier."

He smirked. "You're too cunning."

Her lips quivered and she began twiddling with her fingers. She stood up and leaned against the table directly in front of him.

"What would happen to us now? After graduation, what else should we do? They're trying their best to seperate us. Maybe the world is trying to tell us to stop just like them."

"I don't know either but I don't care. The only thing I know is that I want you and I need you." He stood up from his seat and walked towards the door and locked it. He went back to her and put his hands on the table behind her, caging her body in his arms. She gasped because of their closeness. Her scent calmed his disturbed senses.

"We're never be siblings anymore." He said.

"You think so?"

"Yes, with all I've got. I'll take the risk of loving you."

Her lips curled with a sweet smile that he loves the most. Her eyes flashed with happiness.

"Rin." He whispered sensually before dipping his head low enough to kiss her. The kiss quickly became heated, with their lips clashing with each other. Her nails scraped along the front of his black uniform jacket, feeling the rippling of his muscles beneath. His hands slipped underneath her uniform, reveling in the feel of her soft skin underneath his fingers as he traced the round curves of her body. How much did they missed those kisses. How much they missed the feeling that they have everytime they touch. He began unbottoning her blouse and she helped him the rest of the way. She threw her shirt aside while he removed her bra. He massage her breast with his hands as he laved and kissed the skin on her shoulders. One hand slipped between her legs and the abandoned breast was replaced with his mouth. His fingers pushed her panty aside and played with her folds. She moaned wantonly as he stroke her and her juices start to come out.

Sesshomaru grabbed Rin's hand that was holding on his shoulders and placed it to the bulge in his pants.

"Rin. Touch me." She was surprised when he told her to touch him. Though they'd already have sex several times before, Sesshomaru didn't really demand anything from her. Her fingers began undoing the buttons of his uniform. It was hard for her to concentrate but she wanted to please him too. She parted his shirt, exposing his well chiseled body to her gaze. Her fingers scraped into his skin and she heard him groan under her touch. Her hands start to move until they reached the top of his trousers. Their eyes meet. They are full with want and desire. She unfastened the clasps of his pants and lowered his zipper very slow, dragging out his anticipation. She pushed his pants down with his boxers, just low enough for his erection to come out. Her face reddened and she couldn't help but to gasp on what she'd seen. Her fingers carefully explored the blunt head of his manhood before she wrapped her hand around it. It was so strange to her that she didn't even know what to do to please him. She noticed that he stopped and his forehead was leaning against her head.

"What do you want me to do?" she asked shyly.

"Move your hand up and down." He instructed her in between his ragged breaths.

"Like this?"

"Tighter, Rin."

She gripped him tighter and continued her motion. She could feel him pulse against her hand, his hips jerking slightly in her rhythm. His head moved down on her shoulders and his breaths ghosted her skin.

"S-stop." He stuttered out and hold her arm.

"Did I do something wrong?" she asked worriedly. "On the contrary, you did something really good."

He kissed her gently before urging her to lay her back to the table. He took her legs and wrapped it around his waist as he continued assulting her neck and her chest with his mouth and playful tongue. She couldn't stop herself and she really didn't want to. Large hands rounded her hips before he hooked his fingers to her white underwear. He loosen her legs from his waist before pulling down her panties and dropped it on the floor before leaning on her core tasting her without a warning.

Rin's eyes snapped open as she felt his tongue invaded her wet hole, going so deep as if he wanted to taste her inside. She fought her urge to scream his name. She fell on her back, exposing her breasts to the cold air. He alternated from sucking and licking that could almost lost her sanity. The tension between her thighs started to build up and she felt the need to release it. Her moans got louder and her knuckles had turned white from the tight hold she had on his silver locks. Her body shook as a bolt of pleasure run into her skin.

He stood up and lined himself to her. In no time, he sheated himself inside of her.

"Sesshomaru." she breathed his name with her flushed red face. He placed gentle kisses on her lips and neck before he began a slow rhythm and then the need to go faster urges him to lift her and hugged her waist. Her arms coiled instantly around his neck. Soft moans bubbled out from her throat as he continued to move inside of her.

"Faster." she whispered.

He granted her wish and plunged inside her rough and fast. His hands grabbed her thighs and pulled her closer to him.

"Is this what you wanted?" he growled out as he continued his assault to her. Every bone in her body moved with his thrusts. She felt herself like she was a part of him. His movements were harsh and persistent as if he didn't intend to stop not until she release. Soon they found theirselves in a bliss of ecstasy. Her fingers played his locks as their lips let out some tired gasps. There was nothing and no one can make them feel this kind of euphoria except for themselves.

~xxoxx~

He dressed me silently as if I'm a little girl in his presence. He cleaned me up before he took care of himself. When he put on his shirt, I finally noticed that his second button was nowhere to find. So it was true? That he have someone else? Impossible. He noticed my stare and smirked.

"Here." He said putting a white button on my hand. I was left dumbfounded. How stupid am I to think that he took another woman? I felt my tears fell in my eyes as I said "Thanks." to him.

We walked out of the room silently not wanting to get trouble if someone found out that the great student council president of the school and the topnotcher of the graduating class was having sex with his own twin sister on the student council room. My heart yelped as I watch him says his speech on our graduation ceremony. But then I noticed the kind of sadness in his cold amber eyes as he looked back on me. What's wrong with him?

~xxoxx~

Let her go and leave her alone. My mother told me. Could I do it to Rin? Abandon her. The pain would be temporary but soon enough she'll forget about you. She'll fall in love with someone else. She'll have a life you can never give to her. Would you like to see her broken everytime she's with you?

Like what I'd said before. I cares for nothing. I believe in nothing. It was only Rin that I have concern off. Rin is my everything. To please her, to make her happy, to give her the best for her own sake. I love her yet I love her enough to let her go and not to ruin her life.

I looked on my watch and I saw that there's only one hour left before my departure. I'll do this for Rin. My Rin. I'll never forget these feelings of mine for you. Even in my reveries, I'm all yours and you are mine.

~xxoxx~

He didn't talk to me since our graduation and it made me wondered what was happening to him. Should I go to him and ask him what's wrong. The pain reflected in his eyes startled me. I don't wanna see him like that as if I was the cause of his pain.

When I got home one early afternoon after I officially enrolled myself to Tokyo U, I overheard my father's conversation with Izayoi. He's telling her that my Sesshomaru was leaving that same day. I was so shocked and my knees went numb. So that was the reason. He's leaving me behind for good. Why? Why didn't he informed me about this? Why does he keep on claiming all the pain and blame that I should suffer too? I silently wept and went outside the house only to find InuYasha staring at me with worried eyes.

"Rin-nee-chan." He uttured. He's still twelve years old yet he knew what I really feel that moment. I fell on my knees and buried my face on his shoulder. He touched my hair and sighed.

"Follow him. You only one hour left before his departure time. He ought to know what you really feel." he whispered. I stood up and wiped away my tears. He's right. No one should claim that they knew the best for me. I'll be with Sesshomaru even on the pits of hell.

~xxoxx~

A/n: I was surprised to see that I haven't updated this story before I announced that I wouldn't be around for sometime because of my hectic schedule on my work. I've already uploaded this chapter before and I'm so stupid I actually forgot to publish it. Anyway, I have no time to proofread it so I'm very sorry if you found a lot of errors. I'm so sorry to if the lemony part is so lame I'm not really good on writing such things. XD And it wasn't written on pov for I can't actually write it on that style. Again, thank you for reading this story. Hope to read your feedbacks soon. And wait! About the second button, I heard that in Japan when a guy gave his second button to a girl before/during/after his graduation, it means that the guy intends to marry her someday. Correct me if I'm wrong. Thank you. :)

P.S: my next update would be on October, same with my other SessRin fanfictions.

~Yui Shunrei Ryuzaki