AUTHOR's NOTE – So this is my first attempt at M rated writing…so hopefully it wont be too bad.
This is about Sirius and my OC, Naina, and tells of their relationship with each other…how they each battle their insecurities and the others' too and whether they succeed or not…

PLOT – Sirius and Naina – two souls, two approaches to life and love but they are connected by a thread – a thread of life and love itself. But will the thread hold? Sirius/OC. Rated M for a reason.

Disclaimer - I dont own HP, obviously...but I do own my own characters in this story as well as the plot itself. Using either of these without my permission will not be appreciated AT ALL.

NOTE to ALL those who have ADDED this to their Alert, fav list, REVIEW OR DON'T ADD AT ALL. A writer invests a lot into these pages you read…least you can do is respect them.

There Is Nothing Else

Chapter 7 – The Truth?

And Sirius felt her lips on his, moving against them like they had never left them in the first place and with a groan he surrendered. His hands wove themselves in her dark hair, messing it up around his fingers as he pulled her closer.

He granted her entry into his mouth and their tongues embraced each other. He felt her hands running up and down his back, her knee pushing into his arousal and a guttural moan escaped him and he steered her towards an abandoned table nearby, coaxing her to sit on it which she did but did not ease her grip on him while doing so.

Sirius did not what had come over him or her for that matter…he had expected another slap or tears but not this..not her concern and her care and her…her kiss. Her eyes held so much concern for him, not pity, not sympathy…but pure and simple care that he had been bowled over and when she had moved closer, he couldn't help but move closer to.

And then her lips had met his waiting ones…and he had lost all track of coherent thought.

He had left her lips now and was dragging his own across her hot skin…from her chin to her collarbone as she gripped his hair, pulling at the strands, arching back giving him better access.

He was now pulling her sweater from her shoulder and was nibbling and licking the exposed skin when she moaned out his name and the reality came crashing to him.

WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING? I TOOK SO MANY PAINS TO PUSH HER AWAY ONLY TO LET HER BACK AGAIN? No, no way. She has to hate me, she has to forget al expectations with me! Sirius thought, his face flushing…trying to ignore the soft touch of her fingers on his shoulder.

Lightly shaking his head, he mentally apologized for the words he was going to utter next.

"Enjoying this, Purple?"

Naina moaned again, her eyes closed…feeling him breath into her shoulder.

"Yeah? Well good…we can do this…because you are fucking good at this…"

Naina stirred a bit, not really understanding him.

Sirius sighed inwardly. He had hoped he would not have to go further but it looked like he would have to and with a deep breath, he spoke the next words, not believing he actually was…

"You know…this will be so much better…just fuck buddies. You would like that, wont you? You are like all other girls, aren't you? You would love me sliding inside of you from night to night, make you scream my name…and the other nights, we could both be free to do whatever or whoever we lik-"

Naina had pushed him away, her eyes wide and filled with disgust.

Her lower lip shook, all swollen and pink, "That's what you think of me?"

Sirius desperately wanted to rush to her and grab her hand and hit himself hard and tell her he didn't, that he was lying through his teeth…tell her he will break anyone's teeth who ever made her feel like that but he didn't. Instead he smirked, rubbing his own lip appreciatively.

"You think I am a whore? A slut?" Her voice was now breaking and her eyes were fast watering.

NO, he thought, I don't think that! I could never think that! You are so pure, so precious…and that's why you deserve someone so much better than me…please forgive me for all these harsh UNTRUE words..please…

But he said nothing.

"I cant believe it, Sirius…I thought I was different for you. I thought you…I thought we were different…"

"Well…you are like all others, okay Purple?"

"Don't call me that."

"Oh come on…don't get this way…we can still have fun…" He sauntered over to her, letting one cold finger place itself under her chin.

"Don't, Sirius, don't make me hate myself…don't make me hate myself for falling in love with you. I am sorry I did, I am sorry I thought we were different, I am sorry I thought I was different for you but please don't…don't make me feel so disgusted at myself that I cannot live with myself." She spoke in a soft defeated voice straight into his eyes and he staggered just a bit, letting his finger drop as he involuntarily moved back and watched her fix her sweater and her jump down from the table and move away from him.

And all he wanted to do was call out to her, call out to her and tell her to come back and save him but Sirius had always had a big ego and he always had ideas he held strong and they held his heart back.

Sirius knew what he had done was unforgivable but wasn't that what he was aiming at anyway…to disgust her so much with him that she would not grant him with a second look…ever.

But those tears…they told him something, something he had not expected to see in them after he said all this…they were not angry, they reflected an emotion he couldn't put a finger on…and those words, they provided him with no comfort…instead they had sent a chill down his spine.

Had he gone too far? Had he done some irreparable damage and not the kind he was aiming for?

Had he?

Sirius had no answer and frankly he was too ill-equipped to think about it…for once he had not been able to read Naina Kapoor's eyes and that frightened him…

Plus, he had bigger things to worry about or rather more tangible…Remus had punched him when he had cheated on Naina, what would he do once he got to know what he had said to her…killing him did not seem like a far off possibility but honestly Sirius could not even argue that he would not deserve it. His words were unforgivable and because Naina had not really punished him for it, he was expecting (even hoping) for some kind of punishment for those blasphemous utterance.

He realized he could have effectively ruined his friendship with Remus because he knew Remus could never be proper friends with someone he didn't respect and Sirius was almost certain that his words today would be the reason Remus Lupin would stop respecting him…he sincerely hoped that that wouldn't happen…that by some miracle Remus would forgive him after cursing him to oblivion if that's what it took…

Naina could not believe that this was how she had said those three words to Sirius, to anyone. Yesterday she had felt betrayed and confused, today she felt disgusted and small…she felt dirty and low. Sirius' smirk, his words, his suggestion…she shuddered at the mere recollection of them. She could not believe that the first guy she ever fell in love with, the first guy who she trusted with everything thought of her this way…as a slut.

And truth be told, ever since that incident in the library, Naina was feeling closer to that word with every passing second…she was feeling as if that word was washing over her entire self, washing away every other identity. That word had started to define her and a whimper escaped Naina's shaking lips as another sob wrecked through her body and she pulled her knees closer to herself as she sought refuge in the 6th year bathroom's hard cold floor.

And this was where her roommate Allison Thomas found her, almost lying down, exhausted with bloodshot eyes.

"Naina?" Allison approached the girl on the floor hesitantly. She knew what had happened with her and Sirius…the cheating the break-up, after all everyone present in the castle knew it and she was sure that those out of it would come to know as soon as they returned.

Naina did not look up because quite frankly she had little strength or even will to do so. She just lay there, despondent – that word still slashing her on the inside.

"Naina?" Allison repeated, now kneeling down next to the girl, worry etched on her face.

"Slut."

Allison thought that Naina was referring to Betty Rice and she just laid a comforting hand on her roommate's shoulder.

"Come on Naina…leave her. Don't go as low as her."

"Me."

Now Allison was confused and more than a little worried. Why was Naina calling herself 'a slut', if that was what she was indeed doing and Allison wasn't mistaken. Had she made some rash decision in consequence of the breakup…

"What?"

"I AM. A. SLUT."

Allison was shocked but still confused and definitely enraged that anyone had called Naina such a crappy thing!

"No, you're not. Who said that to you?"

"Sirius…he implied it." A throaty laugh escaped her mouth now but there was no humour in it.

Now Allison was livid.

"WHAT? Are you sure? THE NERVE OF THAT ABSOLUTE JERK!"

"Leave it, Allison…" Naina was now staring at her hands, her voice small.

"That scound- What?"

"I don't want to think about him any more…"

Allison blinked but then gathered herself.

"Well…that's probably a good idea…lets go back to the common room now…" she said, getting up from the cold floor from beside Naina and held out a hand for her distraught companion.

"You…you go ahead, Allison. I'll come in some time…need to get myself sorted first…"

"Ummm…are you sure…I can wait…" Allison said, not convinced this was a good idea.

"Yeah…yeah I am. Go on. I'll catch up. Thanks a lot though, Allison."

Allison nodded and left the bathroom, passing an encouraging smile to Naina at the door before closing it softly behind her giving Naina the privacy she needed.

Naina had by now gotten up and was making her way to the washbasin where she splashed her face and neck with the ice cold water and looked up at the mirror to examine herself and thasts when she noticed the slight swell in her lips.

Absentmindedly, she ran a wet finger over them, her tip touching it lightly and that's when a small doubt came to her…and she snatched her hand back.

What if Sirius was right? Was she a whore?

Her reflection seemed to be pointing it to be not a very distant possibility…her lips were swollen, hair tousled, shirt askew…and she knew it in her heart that she would have gone a lot further with Sirius in the library had he not said what he said…she would have had sex with a man right after he had cheated on her and was not even sorry about it! Did THAT not make her a fit definition for a 'slut'?

A shiver ran through her and she shut her eyes tight in disgust and she felt nauseas…she could not even bear to look at herself! She had dropped so much in her own eyes!

But even with her eyes closed to the world and to herself, Naina could not banish the thoughts which were now flooding her whole self…her shirts were too tight, her breasts too big, her skirt too short, her figure too curvy…she looked and dressed like a slut! It wasn't Sirius' fault…she looked like one! Maybe she even acted like one! Wasn't she too forthcoming in her advances with Sirius? WASN'T SHE?

And she fell to the floor, her face in her hands, hiding it from the world…but her thoughts…they seemed to have invaded her soul.

I look at you all see the love there that's sleeping
While my guitar gently weeps
I look at the floor and I see it need sweeping
Still my guitar gently weeps

I don't know why nobody told you
how to unfold your love
I don't know how someone controlled you
they bought and sold you

I look at the world and I notice it's turning
While my guitar gently weeps
With every mistake we must surely be learning
Still my guitar gently weeps

I don't know how you were diverted
no one alerted you
I don't know how you were inverted
you were perverted too

I look at you all see the love there that's sleeping
While my guitar gently weeps
I look at you all
Still my guitar gently weeps

I look from the wings at the play you are staging
While my guitar gently weeps
As I'm sitting here doing nothing but aging
Still my guitar gently weeps...

~ While my guitar gently weeps by The Beatles

So…what do you think? Has Sirius caused more damage than he ever thought he could? Will Naina fall prey to these thoughts?

So…you want more? Want to know what happens next? I have seen that this story has got a lot of hits and some alerts but only three people seem to be reviewing...I request the others to please also send in a few words...it means a lot and helps an author come up with better stuff...Thank You.

If you like the sound of Sirius and Naina, please do check out my others stories on them…

Please do make your suggestions… :)

A quick shout out to blackprongsscarletlily (you are getting a shout out for every chapter you review…you are my most consistent reviewer! :D), Writerchic88 and cylyste for reviewing and asking me to continue…Thank You!

Writerchic88 – No problem about the late review…at least you did. :p And I am glad you like Remus…he is one of the main people in this fic, besides I love his friendship with Naina…hope you like it too…and am glad you like the fic and are waiting for the next chapter…hope the excitement only increases with this chapter. :)

Cylyste – I am glad Remus is 'dazzling' you! Lol! :D And I am happy you like the girls' bonding…hope you liked this chapter too. :)

NOTE to ALL those who have ADDED this to their Alert, fav list, REVIEW OR DON'T ADD AT ALL. A writer invests a lot into these pages you read…least you can do is respect them.

Thank You for reading (and hopefully reviewing)

KingKhan aka Rae