"What's wrong with him, Ratchet?" Alita asked fearfully. She had wasted no time in seeking out the Chief Medical Officer when she arrived on Earth.
"It's hard to say for sure, but I believe that Prime has suffered a nervous breakdown, or came very close to one. I checked him out just yesterday, and physically, he was fine." Ratchet pause. "However, he did seem disturbed about something that he wanted to talk to me about. Unfortunately, the Decepticons attacked before he could elaborate."
Alita nodded, understanding too well. "He needed to talk to me about something too, but the Decepticons interrupted us. He insisted that it wasn't important, but you know him. He always puts his needs last."
"Yes," Ratchet agreed sadly. "And look where it's gotten him." He gazed at Alita, afraid of voicing his next thought. "Alita, I ran an in-depth analysis of him and found something rather disturbing."
"What is it?" Alita asked, not entirely successful in keeping the worry out of her voice.
Ratchet held up a vial containing a sample of Prime's lifefuel. "I took a sample of his fuel to analyze, and the results aren't good. I found traces of, well, of drugs."
"Prime's been taking drugs!" Alita exclaimed in shock.
Ratchet shook his head. "I know. I can't believe it either. There is one good thing, though. The traces were low, he can't have taken very much. No evidence of drugs has shown up in any prior fuel analyses I made on him over the past few months. So I feel safe in saying he isn't addicted, as of yet."
Alita looked only slightly relieved. "I want to talk to him. When will he wake up?"
Ratchet sighed. "It's hard to tell when he will regain consciousness. The mental pressure is what caused him to retreat in the first place. He may not be ready to return to us just yet."
Alita crossed the room to the medical bed that held her mate. "Prime," she whispered, taking his hand. "Please come back to us. I love you so much. Whatever is bothering you, I'm here to help. Please, Prime." She broke off as a sob welled up in her throat.
Prime slowly opened his optic covers and gazed at her sadly. "I'm sorry, Alita. I let you down. I let all the Autobots down."
"Hush," Alita told him. "Blaming yourself won't help one bit. Just lay back and concentrate on getting better." Ratchet smiled and left the room, leaving the couple alone.
"I guess you know about the Enerweed," Prime said, closing his optics in shame. "It was only one joint, and it was the first time I had taken it. I know that's no excuse."
She squeezed his hand. "It doesn't matter now, Prime. I'm here, and you won't need drugs to relieve your tension any more. I've made arrangements to stay here, for good. Magnus can take over for me on Cybertron. I think he was starting to miss our home planet anyway. We've been apart for too long as it is, and it's high time we pulled rank and stationed ourselves at the same base."
"You're going to stay?" This should have made Prime delirious with joy. But this was not the case. He felt the old guilt rising up in him once more. "Alita, you shouldn't have to transfer on my account. I'll be fine, really."
"Don't give me that, Prime!" she said sternly. "I'm doing this for me too. For us. I want to be with you, whether you need me or not." Prime smiled faintly. Alita saw it in his optics and was pleased.
Prime gazed at her sadly. "Alita, I know you've come a long way, and I'm very pleased to see you, but if you don't mind, I need to be alone right now."
Alita couldn't quite hide the sadness that rose up in her. "Of course, Prime. I understand."
"Please send in Hot Rod to see me. He'll have to lead until I'm back on my feet again, you're settled in, and Magnus has departed for Cybertron."
"I'll do that. You just lay back and rest." Alita kissed the cheek of his metal mask and walked out of the medical bay.
* * * * *
"You wished to see me?" a voice asked hesitantly.
"Yes, Hot Rod, come in." Prime beckoned to him. Hot Rod stepped over to the bed, unsure of what to do. The sight of his leader looking so worn twisted at his soul. He sat down in a nearby chair and leaned forward.
"I suppose you need me to lead again," Hot Rod spoke.
Prime gazed up at him solemnly. "You are correct. This will only be temporary, of course. Alita will need help settling in and adjusting to our chain of command, and Magnus will need help in preparation for his transfer. I'll be back on my feet again soon, and--" He broke off in surprise as Hot Rod reached out with his hand, pushing him gently back down on the bed.
"Don't you worry about it, Prime," Hot Rod told him. "Just take your time in getting well. You need a break from all the stress."
Prime scrutinized the youth in front of him. Although he was physically the same, Hot Rod had matured since his stint as leader of the Autobots. That maturity had remained, although the Matrix had been removed from him. Prime felt like he was seeing the youth with new eyes.
"I'm ready to accept my duties," Hot Rod said solemnly. Prime nodded, his hands reaching for his chest. The panels there swung open at his mental command, allowing him to reach in and withdraw the Matrix. The room was bathed in a soft blue glow. "Lead well, Rodimus Prime." Rodimus reached out cautiously, taking hold of the Matrix and drawing it close to his chest. His chest panel opened, and he placed the Matrix inside. Both robots' chest panels closed with a sense of finality.
Prime watched in astonishment as Hot Rod's body expanded, maturing before his eyes. He instinctively knew, though, that the change was only physical. Inside, Hot Rod had always remained Rodimus Prime, despite his return to his smaller form after Prime had returned.
Rodimus gazed down at his former leader. He could understand all too well what had happened to Prime. Rodimus had felt the incredible pressures of leadership, too. While Prime had become accustomed to them, it was true, the pressure had probably built for many years and, without any means of relief, overwhelmed him. Rodimus realized that he may be the only one to truly realize what Prime had gone through. Not even Alita had felt this pressure. It was this unique understanding that prompted him to speak. "Would you like to talk about it?"
Prime looked up at him in surprise. Rodimus had been among those that regarded him as perfect. The fact that he was now providing Prime with a sympathetic ear showed that he understood the burdens of leadership, and that Prime was only mortal and could not bear the strain by himself. Hot Rod had certainly come a long way. Prime now regarded Rodimus as an equal, someone who could truly understand him. He spoke the words that he could not bring himself to say to anyone after waking up in the med bay, not even to Ratchet or Alita. "Yes, Rodimus, I need to talk about it."
Rodimus nodded. "I thought so. I would have sold my soul to Unicron to have someone to really talk to when I was leading." He knew what Prime really needed, what would help him even more than a heart-to-heart talk. He leaned forward and placed his hand on his leader's shoulder.
Prime was frozen for a moment, almost in shock that what he truly needed was being freely offered by one so young, yet who had become so wise. His shock dissolved, and he slowly opened a mental link between them.
Rodimus held onto Prime's shoulder tightly, reeling slightly as he felt the tension and stress that had built up within his friend. "Let it out," he whispered, knowing how badly Prime needed to release the pressure within and cleanse his spirit. They stayed like that for a long time, Rodimus giving his friend comfort, and Optimus gratefully receiving it.
Finally Prime stirred and broke the mental link. He said with some embarrassment, "I'm sorry to have dumped that on you."
"Nonsense," Rodimus reassured him. "That outburst was long overdue. Don't worry, I understand. I'm just glad I could be here for you."
"You're a true friend, Rodimus," Optimus murmured. In a spontaneous human gesture he reached out to Rodimus, hugging him gratefully.
A giggle came from the doorway. "I didn't know your tastes ran that way, Prime. Kinky."
Prime sat up and felt heat rising to his face at the implication. "Alita, we were just--"
"I know," she laughed. "It's too bad, though. I would have liked to see what happened. Rodimus would have kept me on my toes."
Rodimus grinned at her. "You better hold on to him tight, or I may steal him away from you."
Prime looked absolutely bewildered. "I don't believe you two!" he exclaimed. They started laughing at his comical expression. After a moment, he gave in and laughed too.
"It feels so good to laugh," Prime remarked as Alita approached the bed. Rodimus stood and let her have his seat. He smiled as they held hands.
"I have decided on my first command," he announced. "As soon as you are well, Prime, I order you and Alita to take a vacation together." He grinned at their astonished expression. "Don't disobey me now."
"Thanks, Rodimus," Prime whispered.
Alita leaned over with a mischievous look on her face. "We can start enjoying ourselves right now." She ran her hand suggestively up the top half of Prime's leg.
"Alita! I don't believe you!" Prime gasped. He had to laugh at her persistence.
Alita grinned knowingly at Rodimus, who grinned back. "Please excuse us, Rodimus," Alita said. "We need our privacy now."
"Wait, Rodimus!" Prime protested as he turned to leave. "You don't really have to go! She's just kidding! Aren't you, Alita?" She smiled and bent down to give him a passionate kiss.
As Rodimus' chuckle drifted back to him, Prime knew that everything was going to turn out just fine.
The End