Shadow of Illusion

Prompt: Heliolatry - 'worship of the sun'

Some say men, fool men, were the only ones brave enough to traverse the desert, and even more so to attempt at the peak of the season. But this had been an urgent mission, and one preserved for only the best of SOLDIERs. An A-ranked mission, approved by the President himself.

He'd immediately agreed, knowing the urgency of the situation, and a chopper had dropped him off deep into the heart of the outskirts of Corel. His PHS securely in his pocket, SOLDIER First Class Zack Fair headed off, aiming to call back and have the chopper return by nightfall.

But even SOLDIERs were still human.

There was a call - one of the MPs scouting the area had reported suspicious activity in the desert, possibly some movement of Genesis Copies searching for places to set up base. While it was certainly strange, there was still no word of Genesis himself being sighted, and they still needed to be stopped. A desert would be secluded, for sure, and planning another strike on Midgar would be easier if none of its infantry could even reach the place.

"This is suicide!" One of the lower Classes had claimed. "Sir, you can't possibly go alone! Do you even know what kind of monsters are out there? If the heat doesn't kill you first, they will!"

A leather-gloved hand fell on his shoulder, indicating the arrival of the General himself. At that, the Second immediately clamped his mouth shut, waiting for Sephiroth to speak.

"I'm sure Lieutenant Fair is well-aware of that, SOLDIER." He'd spoken calmly, his tone always cold and unchanging. But Zack could tell - he was worried, too. "It's his decision."

Almost as if on cue, a rush of wind blew past the three men, the ShinRa-grade chopper lowering itself for a brief landing. And with that same gusto, that same upbeat, unshakeable confidence that could only be Zack, he clapped the younger man's back with a grin, ignoring the stunned look on the other's face.

"Relax!" He'd said, not a trace of worry or unease in his tone. "I already said I'm gonna be back by nightfall. And when have I ever gone against my word?"

The younger voice was more subdued this time. "Never... sir."

"Though if you happen to run into any danger you can't handle..." Sephiroth trailed off, the words stern on his tongue, and those emerald green eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, I got your number." Just to prove his point, the other First pulled the PHS out of his pocket, waving it within the silver-haired man's vision. He was still not entirely convinced Zack would be able to go this alone, though he still held some faith in the boy.

He'd be alright.

That was several hours ago.

The chopper had taken him as far as it could without being sighted, where the base was said to be. From there on in, he was alone. A man against the desert, which had been known to take the lives of many fool enough to drag along with no sense of direction. The bodies were there for a day or two after they'd perished, then quickly swept away by the infamous sandstorms, never to be seen again. The young First shuddered at the mere thought, knowing that if he'd been the one to die here, his body would never be retrieved.

So far so good, though. There wasn't any sign of monsters, as far as he'd traveled. But there wasn't any sign of the base, either.

He had his emergency contact, tucked away for later use in the event that there wasn't a hideout to be found. If this wound up being some kind of wild goose chase, he would go back and thwack that MP upside his head. Or... something. Thoughts were a little fuzzy due to the heat. Instinctively, he ran his arm along his forehead, drawing out a huffing breath. Not that it was a bother - Gongaga had that thick humidity to it as well, so this should have been nothing.

...maybe.

"Do you have everything you need?"

Bright blue eyes blinked up at the tall figure standing in the doorway. He was leaning against the frame, arms crossed, to inspect the younger SOLDIER packing his belongings. Surprised for a moment, Zack blinked, pausing in his actions to stare up at his friend. Something was... odd about him. There was a deep, hidden distain for the mission Zack had selected, and to go it alone?

Nah. Sephiroth wasn't... worried, was he?

"Yep. Just double-checking a few things, and-"

"Why did you accept the mission?"

Whatever else Zack was preparing to say, it was immediately blown out of the window by that statement. The smaller SOLDIER sat there, mouth agape, the earlier enthusiasm quickly dying down.

"...you don't think I can do it."

The older man sighed, finally stepping into the room enough to be in close quarters with his companion. The glass door slid shut behind him, concealing the rest of their conversation from outdoor intruders.

"You were only promoted to First a few months ago." He explained, that calm tone deathly serious. "Considering we don't even know what's out there, it's an unnecessary risk."

Zack was quiet a moment or two, pondering this information.

"Let me go in your stead. You don't have to-"

"My mind's made up."

Zack had left for the landing shortly after that, making sure not to give Sephiroth another chance to protest. How was he going to do any good if he was just staying in Midgar the entire time? He wasn't a kid that needed to be shielded from the adults. He was an adult, something his friend should have understood by now. With every step came a new burst of determination, every footstep marking a new milestone in his accomplishment.

And even if he passed his deadline, he would still keep going. He had the heart of a SOLDIER, and a will to surpass anyone else. He could do this.

Sephiroth found it increasingly difficult to concentrate on any of his projects.

Maybe it was due to how quiet the Building seemed after Zack left. Or maybe because he started to worry about how his young friend was faring. Even the best of SOLDIERs, a good chunk of them also Firsts, had never been found alive within Corel's wastelands. They'd never been found, was the larger worry, despising that kind of a fate for someone so young and promising. The General rubbed at his eyes in annoyance, dropping the report he was currently filling out on the desk.

This was absurd. Did he not have any faith in Zack at all? Or had being around the younger SOLDIER for so long softened him too much? Being worried like this distracted him from what he needed to be doing, and he didn't like it.

The silver-haired man stood, the chair scraping against the polished floor, abandoning his work pile to walk out onto the deck. Already, he could see the scarce traces of a sunset beyond Midgar's mako-poisoned clouds, expecting a response from his comrade sometime soon. Evening, if not before, had been the promise, regardless of whether his friend needed help or not. Unconsciously, he felt the device gripped firmly in his gloved grasp, expecting. Almost willing it to ring. But the PHS remained silent, as did the stern General.

Could what they'd spoken of before even been considered a fight?

Zack didn't seem to be angry afterwards, though the other didn't make a habit of showing his true feelings. Maybe it was a factor of hanging around Sephiroth too long, or maybe he didn't want to cause even more heartbreak for the more seasoned SOLDIER. Angeal had passed, much too recently already, and Genesis... well.

Genesis was a traitor. He didn't believe a mere fall could kill a First that easily, and even talk of his copies still wandering about wasn't surprising. Somehow, he felt it. The situation was not yet resolved. If anything, it was just beginning.

Cat-like eyes trailed down to the phone again. Still no answer. If it came to be too late, Sephiroth would contact the boy himself. But only if it got to be too late. He had to trust Zack's judgement, and...

Wasn't that what friends did?

...he couldn't do this.

The thought raged in his mind, again and again, nearly drowned out by the searing heat and the little pinpricks of blowing sand against his flushed skin. He couldn't remember what time he'd been walking, though as long as it was, time halted to have any meaning whatsoever. He just knew he was dragging on, pushing his feet through the sand, feeling his overworked heart throbbing in his chest with every dry gasp.

The bottle of water he'd brought with him was just about gone, even having been used conservatively. Rumour was it that most in the desert died with still half a bottle left, claiming that it was best for the body to ingest it all at once and be able to conserve it. Well... it sure as heck was gone now, and he didn't feel any better.

His bleary gaze turned to the sun, past the noon point and well over into setting by now. But he couldn't remember what he was supposed to do before then, or why. Just that the sun setting was a bad sign, and it meant things were about to get much worse. Didn't it get colder once evening was in place? Or was that just another myth? He didn't want to have to go through hypothermia, of all things, facing the most ridiculous and ironic death ever.

Freezing in a desert. Now that was just silly.

He walked on, every breath gasping, every limb feeling as though it were about to lob right off his torso. Trying to find... a base. Yeah. That was it. Some kind of base, maybe even with water. Or air conditioning. It had to. Just being able to lay down, rest his eyes. Just collapse on a nice, soft bed...

Before he realized what was happening, he did feel himself collapsing in the sand. He'd... tripped over something stiff, half-buried in the environment. With some confusion, the First carefully picked himself back up, pulling into a sitting position to brush some of the sand away from the prone form.

One of two things happened in this moment.

One being that Zack, of all people, had been the first to find one of those lost souls swept away into Corel. It was the body of an Infantryman, just barely a day old, a smile permanently frozen on the young, deceased cadet's face. The second...

This was the very same cadet that had informed them all of Genesis' plot. From a quick sweep over the barren, sand-swept desert, nothing could be found. There was no trigger for a cloaked hideout, no underground entrances... just sand and sun and death sprawling out for miles. The cadet suffered a mirage, just before falling dead in a tomb of sand.

It was a lie.

No... no, there had to be something here! There had to be!

In a delirious panic, the First started clawing frantically at the sand, digging for some kind of passageway, some kind of shelter, anything! But he dug and dug, and there was just more sand, more pain, and more heat searing down on his dehydrated form, pulling his mind further and further from sanity.

But... wait. What was that?

Was that... water? Had he just dug right into an ocean? Maybe it was an underwater base, and he just hadn't been looking hard enough! This was great! He raked further past the sand, going deeper and deeper, allowing himself to partially fall into the ocean, an elated laugh bubbling out of his dry lips.

Except... he didn't feel any better. Why was that? Why did the water feel so-

Oh...

Shit.

Now he was hallucinating.

In a daze, the First pulled himself back to his feet, nearly falling back over when weakness threatened to buckle his knees. He... had to contact someone. But how? ...and where? Wasn't he supposed to?

The SOLDIER, confused and disoriented, continued walking into the sun, his pace less than steady as time went on.

Nightfall. No answer. They had to leave.

Sephiroth had attempted several times to contact Zack's PHS, in the span of the past two hours. Each and every time, the phone rang, and rang, until it eventually turned over to voicemail and he'd hung up in frustration. He didn't feel up to leaving Zack messages he would find later, if he had not already perished in the desert. He needed to know he was alright now.

Unfortunately, even by helicopter, the trip to Corel would take another couple of hours. Every hour meant an even larger chance that Zack would be lost in that sandy prison, and another hour of his life lost. He clutched the PHS tighter, his only lifeline between him, and his remaining friend. The only lifeline that was now failing him because the SOLDIER just wouldn't pick up. Morbid thoughts flooded his mind - maybe he can't hear it. Maybe it's too late. Those were thoughts he wanted to shove out of his mind. Again, he was not trusting Zack enough.

The phone flipped open.

Just that morning, he had texted the General, having just woken up and wondering what he was up to. The silver-haired man looked through his messages, finding that particular text still in his inbox. He smiled slightly, though the grief was still there. The silly, almost childish way he had of typing. Nobody else would be able to get away with it in ShinRa.

'wanna hang out?'

He didn't want that to be the last reminder of Zack. He would bring the boy home, drag him back if needed, or assure that he would get the very best care ShinRa could offer. Time passed, and the negative thoughts were getting harder and harder to push to the side.

Something went wrong.

"Sir, what about the base?"

The question snapped up the elder SOLDIER's attention, focused on a Third sitting across from him. "If we could get there by helicopter, wouldn't we have done so in the first place?"

Sephiroth leaned back, his tone grim upon relaying the words he never wanted to say. "There's a small chance Lieutenant Fair has not located the hideout." If so, Zack would at least report it before going in. There had been nothing, not even a text, to show he had made it that far. "We'll need to comb the desert if we're to find him. And if we do stumble upon some... unwanted company, then we will act accordingly." Who knew? Maybe fighting a few Genesis copies would ease some stress.

"This is crazy, going all the way out for one man."

The General gave a slow smirk, his expression telling everything else that could not be said.

"It is."

Another hour passed. It felt like another hour. Or maybe it was another day.

...no. Another hour. He was counting the minutes, the seconds in his head, struggling to keep his sanity. Words tumbled out of his mouth for so long, he wasn't even thinking about what was being said anymore.

As the sand blurred and churned underneath his feet, vision doubling from more than just the sun beating down on the dunes, he knew it wasn't going to be much longer before he finally collapsed. His legs did not want to move, half-buried in the desert itself. It was the only thing keeping him upright, at this point, one hand shooting out in front of him when he felt the world tip too far once again.

One... two hands. One. He only had one hand.

...wait. Then where was the other?

Did his hand fall off?

Something twitched on the other side. It was still there. Good.

His head raised, to the departing sun over the horizon, where he spotted a small blotch of white. Using his free hand to rub at his eyes, the image remained there regardless. It... could have been another hallucination. But if that had been the case, then why wasn't it gone by now? At first, it appeared to be some kind of hyena, or coyote. The SOLDIER's eyes squinted as he moved forward, struggling to see just what this weird thing was. It was definitely an animal of some sort, but...

Wait, were there flames coming out of its back?

Glassy mako-blue eyes widened, now moving towards the unknown figure at a more elevated pace. Curiously lent him unknown strength, pushing his body past what it had been capable of, through the mountain of sandy grains. Upon his arrival, the white dog-like creature gave a low whine, turning its head around to fixate shining black eyes on the lost survivor. Something was different about this creature, separating it from the normal monsters that inhabited this area. It wasn't just its appearance alone - he could feel it.

It stood on four legs slowly, then gave an almighty howl to the heavens. The flames on its back spun more wildly, an unknown power shooting forth into the night sky.

Zack stared in disbelief, his gaze turned to the thick, sand-blasted clouds overhead. They appeared to open up, a small ray of sunshine pouring over the both of them. All at once, the SOLDIER felt a new rush of healing and hope bursting through him, though before he could thank the wolf... it was gone, taking the sunlight with it. Even with his renewed strength, he felt alone.

The dark-haired man dropped to his knees, blankly gazing up to where the beam of light had been. Was... that a sun god?

He just saw a god.

Whatever the case, it was his final thought before the rest of his body thumped into the dune, motionless.

"There!"

A frantic call erupted from the pilot's seat, pointing down into the desert below. Sephiroth, the Second and Third all rushed from their seats to see, finding a body sprawled out in the wasteland below. The General barked an order to lower them down, disregarding any dangers his men might have informed him of before. It didn't matter, none of it did. Someone was laying in the crevice and... oh gods. There wasn't any movement.

Once the chopper was low enough, the SOLDIERs all ditched the aircraft, rushing over to the body left in the sand.

It didn't seem to be moving. Or breathing.

No. Sephiroth thought, his mind in denial. No... no no! We're not too late. We can't be!

Cautiously, the Second moved to kneel by the still figure, a hand on that lifeless shoulder. Beneath the sand and dirt, the figure was the same height... same build...

Shit.

"...Lieutenant?"

Quietly, almost hesitantly, the body was pushed on its back. And as the sand cleared from its face, down the loose clothing and rolling over the grayed-out face, Sephiroth felt a mixture of relief and dread at the sight.

A ShinRa-grade Infantry helmet. Not Zack, but the cadet who had been sent to survey the location. The one that had reported the hideout in the first place. The elder SOLDIER's form sagged, disbelief flooding his features. Emerald eyes glanced up, past the dead form, to find...

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

A leather-gloved hand gripped at the sand in frustration, before he stood solemnly. The wind blew past his silver hair, grains of sand bumping off the helmets of the other two men. A cruel trick of the Planet was played here, and more than the fallen soldier had been cast for fools. Gaia at her cruelest.

"There's nothing we can do for him." His tone was low, but audible enough to be heard over the wind. "We need to keep searching." The MP could have been anyone, perhaps even Zack's friend. The younger SOLDIER had spoken to another boy several months ago, and in passing between missions. He had wondered exactly how two completely different division could have anything in comment, at the time. But the cadet was far beyond hope, and had only imagined what started this mission in the first place.

Zack had been sent to his death for nothing.

Without warning, the Third moved, standing up abruptly and looking down at something by the fallen cadet. That gaze turned, heading up the dune, a look of awe on the young face.

Sephiroth sighed, not in the mood for this.

"If you're done sight-seeing, we need to move. Immediately." If not for Zack, but the plummeting temperatures. He had no desire to place two more of his men in harm's way if it could be prevented. But the Third did not move, instead turning towards the General in alarm.

"SOLDIER, what is it yo-"

"General Sephiroth, sir. There's footprints."

Sephiroth was about to snap off another retort before the lower-ranking SOLDIER spoke. Quickly striding over to where the younger boy was standing, there were, indeed, imprints still left in the sand. Possibly from only an hour ago, and staggering away from the body. But they were there. They had a trail to follow.

The two SOLDIERs were led back to the helicopter, the silver-haired man's instructions firm and to the point.

"Follow that trail."

Again, time seemed to elude him in this deep, sprawling wasteland. Where there had been searing heat, and blinding light previously... all he could see was darkness, the faintest traces of stars twinkling overhead.

The heavy, bloodshot eyes blearily opened under an encasing of sand, a weak shiver running through his body. He had nothing left, no energy to pull himself forward, to pull out his PHS and struggle out a cry for help. All he could do was lift his head, follow the furry white creature that padded circles around him. It lowed and whined, nuzzling his face with a wet, black nose.

But he couldn't move.

What...

Huh.

A wolf. It was a wolf in the desert. The flames still swirled over its furry back, illuminating their now-dark tomb. An idle part of him wondered just how it was managing such a feat without burning the fur...

But it did no good. He could feel himself fading, the desert around him seeming to melt away into... something else. Something... like Midgar. Laying in bed with a gallon of water, under the sheets of his bunk. He was comfortable, and he could just drift off...

But the wolf was still there, watching him from the side of the bed. The sun's rays never seemed to fade from its form, and he smiled weakly. Oh, man, did he want to pet it. His arm would not cooperate, feeling as though it'd hardened with the rest of the sand, stiff as stone. He was inside, wasn't he...? What was he doing thinking about sand?

It wouldn't break itself free of the sheets. And a part of him still preferred it that way.

The wolf licked his cheek, folding its ears back. He... couldn't see anything else but that wolf, gasping lightly at a sudden change. Red marks began to appear over that stark-white fur, almost tribal in their design. He wasn't sure how or why he was seeing these markings... was it a sign of some sort?

Another low whine echoed in his consciousness, the world once again fading to black. No... it wasn't the time to think about things like that. Not now. He could just fall asleep... just for a moment. The SOLDIER's hand sluggishly dragged out, resting over that warm, furry head, strength failing him as the world grew even darker.

The wolf was gone, this time for good. Instead, the beating of helicopter blades and harsh wind overcame his still body. And... voices. Calling out his name...

"...Zack!"

It all happened at once.

Without even watching for the aircraft to land, Sephiroth was leaping down, landing on his feet yet crashing to his knees, hunched over the unmoving form. Zack was laying on his side, skin dry and cracked, limply rolling with the SOLDIER's desperate attempts to bring him back to consciousness. Sand stuck to his arms, his pants, over most of his face, running a little into a gaping mouth. Just like the cadet. But he was still warm, his body still loose.

They had a chance.

The Second was there shortly after, providing a water bottle and helping the General to lift the Lieutenant's head carefully. The man's spiked hair was matted down with dirt and sweat, uncharacteristically stiff, nearly digging into Sephiroth's fingers enough to cause a bit of pain. If it meant saving the life of his friend... it was a minor annoyance.

The wolf was under the back of his head, trying to squeeze inbetween himself and the pillow. It growled once, then settled down to rest.

The Third followed with a portable oxygen tank and mask, waiting for the water to be administered before acting. Though the First was still breathing - one hand was on his chest to be sure - there was a high possibility that could stop anytime soon.

-COUGH

The sound barreled through Sephiroth's ears, pushing out a heavy sigh of breath he hadn't even known he was holding. The smaller SOLDIER in his grasp continued to cough violently, his free hand moving to keep the boy down. As an afterthought, splashes of water were dabbed over his face, his arms, and even under his turtleneck, trying to cool the man down and restore hydration to his system. It didn't seem to be doing much just yet, so the oxygen was placed over the pale face, all three SOLDIERs working to pull the semi-conscious man up and carry him to help.

The bed was shaking, trying to push him off. It had succeeded, and the ill man found himself sprawled out on the floor.

Laying Zack back down on the floor of the vehicle, a gloved hand ran over his friend's neck, checking just how severe the damage was. Despite everything that just happened, over their frantic screaming and struggling to pull him up... this was the one thing to cause the man to finally stir.

Or maybe it was how cool the floor felt.

Weary, heavy blue eyes cracked open, rolling over the unfamiliar territory. Surprised, Sephiroth drew his hand back, learning everything he needed to know. The other First's heart-rate was erratic, most likely leading to failure if they'd wasted even a few more minutes. And though the glow was dimmed, and Zack clearly had no clue where he was... he recognized Sephiroth.

That was important enough.

The wolf faded away, the scene of his quarters melting along with it. It was still dark, but this was not anywhere he'd seen before. ...maybe he had, but he couldn't remember.

"...Seph... iroth...?" The voice was faint, garbled. The word ran through dry, near unmoving lips at his struggle to gain a grasp over the situation. Hadn't he just been in bed with that wolf-thing? What was he doing here? Was this an illusion, too?

Those who worship the sun would be blessed by it. So why was it that he seemed to be punished? Maybe because he didn't actually worship anything.

...was it all a test?

The General's hand ran over that flushed, overheated skin, over the other's forehead and through a few, sticky stray locks draping down. Even through heat exhaustion, that black, spiky hair never changed its shape.

He smiled at that, more genuine than it had been all day.

He was blessed. He wouldn't be laying here now if he wasn't.

"Shh." He responded instead. "We're going back to Midgar. The mission is over."

"Miss..." Oh. Right. He was on a mission. But... what was he...? "...ah." The exhausted SOLDIER opened his mouth to speak, but he was swiftly cut off. There was nothing Zack needed to say - the whole thing had been a mess of misunderstandings. Something they'd need to clear up later.

Minor annoyances.

"There was nothing to be found." His friend admitted softly, shifting his position when he felt the aircraft start to take off again. Almost instinctively, Zack lightly gripped the floor underneath him, unaware that the side-doors were already closing. "It..." Closing those emerald, cat-like eyes, he shook his head. "It was a fluke. The cadet suffered a mirage in his own heat exhaustion, possibly only minutes before he fell dead. It was why he had not responded to later calls."

Misunderstandings or not, there was still that stab of guilt, deep within the younger SOLDIER. The cadet had been sent out here on a fool's errand, going delirious, contacting HQ about those messed-up visions, then just... dying. Alone. Because of it, he'd nearly suffered the same fate.

"...s-sorry."

Sephiroth tipped his head a little, half to hear what was being said, and half in confusion. "For what?"

Closing his eyes lightly, the dark-haired man shook his head, gasping out a wheeze through the oxygen mask still over his face. "S-should've called earlier." Sephiroth opened his mouth to protest, cut off by another pained wheeze. "Followin' the wolf."

Hn. So it didn't seem as though Zack was as sane as he'd hoped. A wolf in the desert? What kind of nonsense was this?

"...had th'sun on her back." He gasped again, not even opening his eyes. The man's voice was faint, fading still with every word. "Might've been a god... or som'thing."

With this, Sephiroth's hand gently pressed over the younger boy's arm, feeling the muscles beginning to sag.

"...I think... I pa-passed."

And that was it.

If there was an explanation to Zack's words, he would not have it now. The SOLDIER's head lobbed back, a long, relaxed breath passing through his lungs. The General's hand remained in place, looking over his companion with concern.

Fate worked in mysterious ways, or so he'd heard. The gods would put the strongest men through these trails, testing their endurance, their loyalty.

Growing up, he'd only known that gods were simply a scapegoat for those who were simple-minded enough to believe they existed. But... possibly. What other reason could there have been, to have a life spared when another had been taken so easily? There was no telling what their reasoning would be, and why. People simply accepted it, welcomed them into their lives.

Now...

Maybe he could, too.

The helicopter departed, raising into the sky until it was swallowed by the clouds. And underneath, a single, white figure remained, padding off into the night sky.

Morning would come. Life went on.

fin