Okay, yes I know this is not my usual forte, but whatever. It's a China/Skulduggery.
IMPORTANT: SET DIRECTLY AFTER MORTAL COIL, and Tanith DID NOT GET POSSESSED BY A REMNANT.
I don't own Skulduggery Pleasant, the awesomely awesome Derek Landy does.
On with the story!
Valkyrie Cain had never been more shocked when she saw China Sorrows sitting, as radiant and elegant as ever, in Bespoke Tailor's.
"China?" Skulduggery Pleasant, also known as the Skeleton Detective, for obvious reasons, also looked surprised. "What are you doing here?"
China shrugged, picking up a cup of tea and taking a delicate sip. "Weren't you the one who said that we were all now friends? I just thought it might be a good idea to get to know my friends better." Her sarcasm was clear.
Tanith Low, who was sitting opposite her, folded her arms, a scowl flitting across her pretty features for a moment. "Ghastly invited her." She then forced a smile. "She liked my outfit even more than she did the last time!"
Ghastly Bespoke, who was sitting in the corner, stitching up the hem of a shirt, shrugged, and shot Skulduggery a look. "I just thought she might want something made."
Skulduggery stared back at his best friend, and if he had a face, his expression would have been an accusing one. "Ghastly. Talk. Now. Let's go."
"Now?" Ghastly asked, casting a look at his unfinished creation. "But this shirt needs—"
Skulduggery stomped over and pulled the other man into the kitchen. The remaining girls stared, puzzled.
"What's with him?" Valkyrie asked, puzzled. "He's acting even weirder than usual."
"If that were possible," China said quietly.
Tanith rolled her eyes. "We're all weirdos here, China."
"Just because we are all now friends"—she said the word like it was something disgusting—"that does not mean I am as mentally unstable as the rest of you."
"China." Valkyrie folded her arms. "Be nice."
"Yes, mother," China muttered, before giving a dazzling smile. "I do apologize, Tanith dear. But I do not like to classify myself as something weird. I prefer, perhaps, unusual? Though your brand of unusual seems to be much stronger than mine."
Tanith smiled back at her. "Perhaps, China dear. We are all unique in our own ways, are we not?"
Valkyrie shook her head. "I don't know which I prefer. You and China being horrible to each other is annoying. But you and China being nice to each other is disturbing."
Fletcher Renn suddenly appeared behind her, putting his hands over her eyes. "Guess who?"
Valkyrie shrieked at the sudden "attack", and, not realizing it was only him, she elbowed him in the gut before delivering a kick to his shin. Fletcher doubled over before collapsing, writhing in obvious pain.
"Val, it was only Fletcher," Tanith said carelessly, leaning back.
"Oh." Valkyrie helped her groaning boyfriend up, suddenly apologetic. "I'm sorry, Fletch. But you really should know better than to sneak up on me."
"Yeah, I really should," Fletcher mumbled, before his hands went to his hair. "I'm still gorgeous, right?"
"Define gorgeous," China put in. "Does it include ridiculous hair? Because then I'm sure you've found the right description."
Fletcher childishly stuck his tongue out at China, but Valkyrie could see he was struggling, as so many like him had, not to fall in love with her. It wasn't real love, but it was just as strong, and Valkyrie herself knew how hard it was to resist.
"Why are you here?" she asked, trying to distract him.
"What, I can't come and visit my favourite girl?" he asked, slipping an arm around her shoulders. "Though, actually, I was here to take you to Australia again. Take you surfing, if you like."
"What, right now?" Valkyrie looked down at her crime-fighting outfit. "Not in this, I'll shrivel up from the heat as soon as we get there. Let me get some stuff from home and then we can go."
"Cheers." Fletcher grinned, and then looked at Tanith and China. "Would you lovely ladies like to accompany us?"
Tanith shook her head, and China shrugged. Fletcher took that as a no, and then he and Valkyrie disappeared.
The two women sat in awkward silence, and after a minute, Ghastly and Skulduggery returned. Ghastly was grinning widely and Skulduggery was muttering under his breath, sounding irritated.
"What were you talking about?" Tanith asked curiously.
Ghastly opened his mouth to reply, but Skulduggery cut across him. "Nothing." He looked around. "Where's Valkyrie?"
"She went to Australia with Fletcher," China replied, taking another sip of tea.
"Oh." Skulduggery looked thoughtful for a moment, before striking up a conversation with China about something or another.
Tanith got up and walked over to Ghastly, who had returned to his beloved sewing machine. "Seriously, what were you talking about?"
Ghastly glanced at Skulduggery, who, though was not facing him, was clearly eavesdropping on his conversation with Tanith. "I'll tell you later."
99999
Later, it transpired, was only really ten minutes away. China rose and said she had to get back to her library. Skulduggery had decided to return home, simply for lack of anything better to do with his time. It had mostly been peaceful since they had returned all the Remnants to their room in the Midnight Hotel.
Tanith waited until she saw the Bentley driving away before turning to ask Ghastly, "Alright, for about the hundredth time, what were you and Skulduggery talking about?"
Ghastly gave a roguish grin. "Stuff."
Tanith glared at him, hands on her hips. "Ghastly."
Ghastly looked back at his sewing machine, hiding his grin from his now-irritated girlfriend. "What? We were talking about stuff."
"Ghastly." She had a threatening look on her face. "Don't make me hurt you."
Knowing that this was a very real threat, as well as one Tanith was capable of, Ghastly gave in. "Skulduggery…and I…were talking about…feelings…"
"Feelings?" Tanith pulled up a chair and sat down beside the other man. "Feelings about what? Or should I say about who?"
Ghastly looked like his face was going to split in two he was smiling so widely. "You should say who. I know that this is going to sound a little crazy, but…Skulduggery…" Ghastly paused. "I don't know if I should tell you, he might seriously injure me…"
Tanith smiled sweetly. "Yes, well if you don't stop beating around the bush, I'll seriously injure you. Now be a sweetie and tell me what you were talking about."
Ghastly sighed. "Skulduggery has…feelings for—don't laugh, okay?—China."
Tanith shook her head, sure she must have misheard. "I'm sorry, what?"
Ghastly pressed his lips together. "Skulduggery. Likes. China."
Tanith stared. "Like-likes?"
"What are we, five?"
Tanith stared some more. "You're joking."
Ghastly shrugged. "Ask him if you don't believe me."
"Ask who what?"
Fletcher and Valkyrie had appeared behind them, dressed in T-shirts and shorts. Valkyrie was already shivering, and Fletcher moved over to the door to close it and turn the heat up.
"Skulduggery likes China!" Tanith burst out, and, as it finally sunk in, she started laughing.
Ghastly glared at her, or at least tried to, but his mouth was curling up at the edges too. "Tanith. Don't laugh."
Valkyrie shook her head, and then pinched herself on one bare arm. "Wake up, Val, you're dreaming." She then glanced at Fletcher, who didn't look at all surprised.
"You mean you didn't know?" he asked, looking at Tanith.
Three pairs of eyes turned to him, wide.
"And you did?" Ghastly asked, speaking for all of them.
Fletcher shrugged, and then nodded. "Sure. It was obvious. He's always talking to her. But I think he only realized it a couple of months ago. Like, right after we got rid of all the Remnants. But I knew he did right after we heard about Darquesse."
Valkyrie went quiet at that. "I'm really sorry I didn't tell you about that."
"Val, seriously, it's okay," Tanith reassured.
"It was a big thing to keep secret." Ghastly gave her an understanding glance.
Fletcher shook his head. "Don't worry, Val." He gathered her under one arm and kissed her tenderly on the top of her head. "Anyway, he's, like, kinda protective of her now. Don't tell me you didn't notice?"
The other three all shook their heads. Fletcher sighed. "How unobservant of you all."
"Well, we need to get them together!" Valkyrie said enthusiastically. She wasn't known for liking things like this, but at this moment, she found it both hilariously funny and sweet that her partner liked the impassive China.
"I think we need to find out if China feels the same way before we try anything like that," Ghastly put in thoughtfully.
"Tanith and I can do that," Valkyrie answered. "Right Tanith? We can go see China now."
"Great," said Tanith in a tone that implied the opposite.
"Wait," Fletcher interrupted. "How can you be sure that it's not that spell that China puts on people? The 'fake' love thing?"
Ghastly shook his head. "That hasn't worked on Skulduggery for almost centuries. If I remember correctly, the only time it worked was the first time he met China and that a long time ago."
Valkyrie nodded. "Yeah, now let's go find China. Fletch, teleport us over?"
Fletcher nodded. "Alright. Ghastly, are you coming?"
Ghastly shook his head. "I've got clothes to finish. I'll see you later. Well, I'll see Tanith later anyway, right?"
Tanith nodded, before joining hands with Valkyrie. Fletcher took Valkyrie's other hand, and they disappeared.
99999
After bidding Fletcher goodbye, Tanith and Valkyrie approached the library. As usual, her assistant was standing at the door, arms behind his back. When asking him where China was, he raised his eyes to the ceiling.
"Thanks," Valkyrie said, and led the way up to China's apartment.
Tanith knocked, and the door opened after a moment. China was standing there, wearing a pale blue dress and no shoes. She raised her eyebrows.
"Just when I thought I'd seen the last of you for today," she said, but she was smiling slightly. "Come in."
It was starting to darken outside, as could be seen through China's windows. The apartment was warm and well-lit, and China led them into the parlour.
"Sit down," she said. "Do you want any tea?"
Tanith nodded, and Valkyrie shrugged, so China opened the fridge and different cupboards, pulling out teabags, milk, sugar, and other essentials.
"China, can we ask you something?" Tanith began, glancing at Valkyrie quickly.
"Ask away," China replied, her back to them as she searched her cupboards for a packet of biscuits.
Valkyrie looked at Tanith, who nodded at her to continue. Valkyrie took a deep breath, before asking, "Do you like Skulduggery?"
Both women saw China stiffen, barely for a moment, before she turned, a smile on her face that didn't reach her eyes, which held an emotion they could not identify. "Of course I do. I suppose he is quite a good friend when he isn't acting too paranoid."
Valkyrie gave China a withering look. "China, don't play dumb. You know what we mean."
China raised an eyebrow. "Really? Because if I do, I'm not aware of it."
Tanith folded her arms, also fixing China with a look. "Come on, China. You do know what we mean."
China sighed, and sat down in the third chair. "Honestly, I don't know what you're talking about.
"Alright then." Valkyrie raised her eyebrows. "Do you have romantic feelings for Skulduggery?"
"No," China replied, her expression unchanging.
"Wait here," Tanith said with a sigh. "I'll be back in five minutes."
99999
Tanith returned with Philomena Random by her side. China's eyes widened, and she stood gracefully.
"What on Earth do you think you're doing? Don't you dare try to get her to use her mojo on me, Tanith Low."
Tanith smiled widely, and Valkyrie patted China's shoulder. "And there it is," the younger girl said with a smirk. "Now we don't need to."
"Thanks, Phil," Tanith told the other woman.
Philomena rolled her eyes before leaving. "My name is Philomena."
Tanith shrugged, before returning her eyes to China. "Thank you, China. Now we know that you like Skulduggery."
China's eyes narrowed. "What—?"
"Well, duh," Valkyrie said, as though it was obvious. "The only reason you'd mind Philomena using her mojo on you was if you had something to hide."
China sighed, and sat back down. "Couldn't leave me alone, could you?"
Valkyrie placed a hand on China's shoulder. "Why is it a bad thing? Why don't you tell him?"
China rolled her eyes at the younger girl. "Oh, I don't know, maybe because I don't feel like getting laughed at?"
Tanith sat down again. "If he laughs, I'll punch him for you."
China gave a forced smile. "I appreciate the…offer, but I'm not planning on telling him. Not now."
"That's the problem with immortality, China," Tanith said softly. "Procrastination. One thing I would regret if I had died in the Remnant attack would have been not telling Ghastly how I felt earlier than I did. Tell him before it's too late, that's what I say."
China shrugged. "I'm still not telling him."
Valkyrie exchanged glances with Tanith. "Maybe you won't have to…" she said cryptically.
"Or maybe you won't have a choice," Tanith added quietly.
99999
"Ghastly. What are you and Fletcher doing?" Skulduggery Pleasant was being pushed in a rather undignified manner towards a room in China's library by Fletcher and Ghastly.
"Just go in there," Ghastly replied impatiently. "I'm conducting an experiment with Fletcher. We need you to go in there for a few minutes.
"Okay…" Skulduggery raised an eyebrow (he was wearing his façade, this time with black hair and green eyes). "What sort of experiment?"
Fletcher sighed. "We can't tell you: that would ruin it. Just sit in there for a few minutes, alright?"
Skulduggery shrugged, knowing he didn't really have a choice either way. They reached the doorway, and Fletcher opened it quickly as Ghastly pushed Skulduggery in. The door was slammed shut behind him, and Skulduggery heard Tanith's hiss of "Withstand" as well as Valkyrie's laugh.
"Let me guess," came a wry voice, and Skulduggery spun around, hands out and ready to attack. "They told you they were conducting an experiment too?"
It was China, wearing a pink sleeveless top with a black skirt. Her shoes were simple pink flats.
Skulduggery frowned, tapping the symbols carved into his collarbones. The skin retracted, leaving him with a skull for a head. "You mean they're not doing that?"
China rolled her eyes, arms folding across her chest. "I've been in here for half an hour. Valkyrie and Tanith shoved me in here and told me the same thing."
Skulduggery sounded even more puzzled. "If we're not in here for that then why are we here?"
China's eyes widened slightly, and for the briefest moment, Skulduggery could have sworn he saw her porcelain cheeks flare with colour. He shook away the thought, however, because in the next moment, she was looking as emotionless as ever.
"No idea," she replied smoothly.
The words that came through the door, however, begged to differ.
"Skul, if you and China want to get out…" Fletcher's voice began.
"You have to kiss first!" That was Valkyrie's voice, unusually sing-songy.
"WHAT?" If Skulduggery had had a face, his cheeks would have been bright red. "Are you joking? I'm not kissing China! I'm not even sure I can! Are you absolutely insane?"
"Oh, stop acting like a girl," Tanith said from behind the door. "Go on. We'll let you out if you do."
China rolled her eyes (she'd been doing that a lot lately) and called back, "Like Skulduggery said, how do you even know if he can?"
But there was no reply from outside, and Skulduggery said loudly, "Are you even there?"
There was still no sound, and China sighed, seating herself gracefully on a box. "Guess we'll have to wait."
Skulduggery shrugged. "Guess so." Instead of sitting, he instead decided to lean against a wall, arms folded.
It was silent for a few minutes.
"Have you kissed yet?" came Ghastly's voice through the door.
Skulduggery leapt up and moved closer to the door. "Ghastly, open this door, and I promise I'll only hurt you a little bit once I'm out."
Tanith snorted. "I'm the only one who can do that. None of them know how to open the door."
"Though Fletcher could always teleport in there and let you out," Valkyrie mused.
"Not that I'm going to," Fletcher added mischievously.
China then frowned slightly. "I don't understand, Skulduggery," she said quietly, so that they wouldn't hear her. "Why would they want to make us kiss anyway?"
Skulduggery started spluttering incoherently, and if he'd been wearing his face, he would have been bright red again.
China knew why she would want that. But why would he? Unless…
China's pale blue eyes widened as she took a sideways glance and Skulduggery, who was now sitting against the door, arms folded and an angry aura radiating from his form.
"Skulduggery…" she began, not bothering to keep her voice down. "Are you going to answer my question? Why would they want to make us kiss anyway?"
She heard Valkyrie and Tanith's peals of laughter, Ghastly's muffled chuckle, and what sounded like Fletcher rolling around on the floor with silent amusement.
Skulduggery, however, was silent, his arms tightening over his chest as he glanced away from her. "I have no idea."
"I'm not stupid," China replied evenly. "You know, so please, tell me."
Skulduggery let out what seemed like a sigh. When he spoke, his voice was almost inaudible, and China had to strain to hear it. "They must know about…feelings."
China could feel her heart thudding in her chest, but she silenced it quickly. "Feelings for…?"
"You." Skulduggery sighed again.
China's eyes widened, and this time, she did nothing to hide the growing blush on her pale face. "What sort of feelings?" she couldn't help but ask.
Skulduggery stood so suddenly that China couldn't help but take a few steps back in shock. He closed the distance between them in three strides, his taller frame leaning over her petite one.
"For you, China. I have feelings for…you." He raised a hand to place it over his face, sounding utterly embarrassed.
China stood still for a moment, before smiling a beautiful smile. She took his hand, lowering it to his side, before tapping the symbols carved into his collarbones. A face flowed onto the skull, and Skulduggery's face was now red. His hair was this time dark brown and his eyes were blue.
"I do prefer you without the face," China said quietly, still smiling. "But it is so much easier to do this when you have one."
"Do what?" Skulduggery asked, frowning, just as China pressed her lips to his gently. Her hands went to his shoulders, and she had to stretch up on her toes to match his height suitably. Both pairs of eyes closed as Skulduggery moved his hands down to China's waist.
They were so caught up in each other that they didn't hear the door click open quietly. Four pairs of eyes peered in. The first pair, at the very bottom, was dark brown, almost black. The pair above was deep blue. The pair above those was a shade of green. And the final pair at the very top was a hazel colour.
Valkyrie let out a sigh as all four of them muttered one word.
"Finally."
Yes, I realize they are a bit OOC, but I really don't care! Hopefully some reviews...?
Hope you liked it!
I Like Writing Romance