WARNING THIS IS 8 PAGES LONG, UNEDITED AND UNFINISHED B/C TONIGHTS EPISODE LOST MY WILL TO FINNISH (PLEASE READ NOTE BELOW AT LEAST.

I will not be updating this until I get a better grasp on Finn and Rachel''s future involving career, life, and college. If you read t 'Trails' I had Finn based on Osu, and Rachel based on Julliard (b/c I was sooooo stupid to look up of EVERYTHING I look up, like I even know what their houses look like the furniture in their guest bedroom, their car, everything however I did not even look up If JULIARD had a stupid preforming arts major, STUPID STUPID STUPID, but if you just love my writing then you will have to read once I publish it my AU story, regarding falling in love in the big city or NY rather in the safe halls of William McKinley for ours (mine at least) favorite couple. Until I write again. –Mady

Feel free to read this but the quality probably sucks but I spent like a freaking month writing this in between English papers, Chem labs, and the craziness that is Ap world. P.S follow me on tumblr if you haven't every once in a while I will post about how my stories are going. It's not even done

"Rach were home," Rachel heard her husband call from the front door, followed by her girl's pitter patter of feet, and "Mommy, Mommy!" Rachel however, was focused on the unexpected guest in front of her.

….

Ding Dong Ding Dong. Rachel heard from her spot in the kitchen where she was currently enjoying the unusual quietness of her home, Finn took the girls out to do who knows what, it was some holiday and Finn and Ali didn't have to go to work or school respectively, leaving Rachel home with a six-month old Liam. Rachel groaned at what came next the shrieks of said eight-month from the playpen she had him napping in. Picking up and lugging him to the door she was shocked by the woman standing on the other side.

"Rachel! hi," the brunette smiled taking in the still seemingly young mother with a crying baby on her hip, "Oh I'm soo sorry I didn't know that he'd be asleep, I should've called, or knocked softly."

"Shelby," Rachel breathed, "What are you doing here? What are you doing in New York, and here of all places?"

"Can I come in" Shelby asked her 'daughter.'

Rachel wrinkled her brow "Um yeah sure," she stepped aside, to allow the slightly aged but still same woman who she had not seen since her senior year of high school. "I'm just going to put him upstairs, um I guess you can wait in the kitchen just straight back." Rachel sighed opening the baby gate at the bottom of the stairs and jogged up them to take her child to his room. Upon returning she found her estranged mother admiring the photos that littered the hall way to the kitchen.

"Your family is beautiful," Shelby said still viewing the photos.

Rachel pointed to one particular from a Disney World, in which they courageously took a newly five year old, three and a half year old, and 4 month old for said five year olds' birthday. "That's Alianna, she had just turned five, and Lola is three almost four, then Liam was four months old, but now he's almost 8 months old."

"You look so," Shelby took a pause "Happy"

After a deep long breath, Rachel mustered up a response "Do you want some coffee?" It was still a response no matter how lame.

"Sure," Shelby replied following the younger nearly identical woman into the kitchen. "I have to ask, how did power hungry Rachel Berry, who wanted Broadway and nothing else, become a stay at home mother, half an hour out of the city?"

"Things change, what I thought I wanted wasn't what I really wanted. I really don't expect you to understand, at least not with me anyway." Rachel told Shelby with her voice slightly on edge.

"Yes Rachel, I gave you up ok, and I don't ever expect you to understand why, but I understand more than you think, because for the past 15 years, I've not been able to do this." Gesturing to the house that was nearly a picture of suburbia, I did things all wrong, both times, I could've had a life with you, and I decided not too, then I have Beth, who I love to death but I'm alone, I cannot do the field trips or the birthday parties. You have your house, and your husband, and your fame, as short-lived as it was. Rachel things would have never worked out when you were young, I didn't come here to be some long lost grandmother to your children, and I came to see how you were doing, to meet them, because I do still care about you."

"Mommy who's that?" Alianna questioned entering the kitchen with Lola behind her, both clutching brand new dolls. Rachel's eyes flicked from Shelby to her daughters, unable to muster a response.

"Hi, I'm Shelby; I'm a friend of your mommy." Shelby said crouching in front of the girls

"That's silly," Ali said to the older woman.

"Ali" Rachel warned, at her daughter's bluntness.

"May I ask why? Shelby questioned.

"Because," Ali sighed as if it was obvious, "that's my sisters name" Rachel closed her eyes, knowing what she was referring too. "I'm Alianna Carolyn Hudson, and she" Ali pointed to her sister, who she tended to speak for, "is Lola Shelby Hudson, and my brother is Liam Christopher Robert Hudson, and my mommy is…"

"Ali that's ok," Rachel warned.

"Hey babe, were back, I took the girls to the toy store and…" Finn said entering the kitchen with a bag from the toy store, stopping when he observed the guest in the kitchen. "Oh" he said his eyes meeting Rachel's that were pleading for help. "Girls go put your dolls upstairs," Finn sputtered as his girls begrudgingly sulked out of the room, "if you don't mind me asking" Finn started once the girls had gone upstairs. "No never mind it's my house what the he'll are you doing here?"

"Finn" Rachel found herself warning

"No, maybe I shouldn't have come, it's just Beth she was visiting with her father and it's the first time we've been here. I knew you were here and maybe my curiosity got the best of me. It's obvious this is just going to cause trouble and questions for your daughters. I'm sorry but I'm just gonna go" Shelby said picking her bag off the kitchen table.

"No don't" Rachel blurted, "Stay, it won't really be a problem, I don't know, we can talk, catch up?"

"I would like that," Shelby smiled, however Finn sighed and ran his hands through his hair.

"Mommy, Lola woke the baby up" Ali said walking in with her hands on her hips emitting a groan from Rachel,

"Nu uh, you did because you wanted to show him your doll." Lola frowned.

"I'll go get him," Rachel groaned walking out of the kitchen, with Finn following close behind,

"Rach, what just happened?" Finn followed his wife up the stairs, "Rachel come on," Finn groaned at his wife's lack of response "Rachel"

"I don't know ok? " Rachel whisper yelled at Finn once they were in the nursery of their son, she pulled the child out of his crib, and onto her hip. "I was enjoying the quiet Liam was napping, and then she was just there, and no matter how messed up our relationship was or is, she's still my mother what am supposed to do, tell her to leave?"

"I just know what she does to you Rachel, time after time she has rejected you and I see what she does to you, and know. Now there is the girls, who are very bright and already acknowledged that there are obvious similarities between Shelby and them, and you, what are we supposed to do when they ask why you guys look alike, because Rachel in high school it was pretty obvious how much you two looked alike and now, now it's just weirdly uncanny. Oh yeah she's your other grandmother who never bothered to meet you." Finn pleaded.

"Please Finn, just let me do this, maybe this will blow up in our faces and the girls will be emotionally scarred but Finn I haven't seen my mother since our senior year of high school. Please Finn." Rachel pleaded back.

"Fine," Finn groaned with lack of approval, "Do you want me to take the girls back out so you can have some alone time."

"No I'll be fine," Rachel said bouncing her fussy baby on her hip. "Just take the baby, I need to make him a bottle." Once downstairs they found Shelby at the Kitchen table with the box of Rachel's scrapbooks she had made on the floor. The girls were on either side of her, with open books. Rachel had started scrapbooking when she was pregnant with Ali, and not working. She had various events categorized in those books, from her wedding to her children's first couple years. "Girls you're not supposed to get into the books without my permission."

"But mommy Miss. Shelby wanted to know what I was gonna be for Halloween and then I wanted to show her my costumes from last year, annnnddd I just wanted to show her!" Ali said from the table.

"I'm showing her when I was a baby!" Lola said, Rachel sat down watching her daughters interact with her mother.

"You know girls, Mommy hasn't seen Miss. Shelby in a long time, why don't we go downstairs and watch a princess movie." Finn said from his spot at the island giving Liam a bottle, Rachel had made.

"On the football and x-box tv?" Ali asked excitedly referring to the large TV Finn kept in the basement away from little hands and projectile toys.

"Yes now come on," Finn said propping the basement door open with his foot and watching two pairs of feet scurry down the steps, fighting already over who gets the recliner. Once they were gone Rachel brought two cups of coffee over to the table, she picked up one of the books off the table and went for the other one which happened to be Lola's baby book but Shelby stopped her.

"Do you mind if I look?" She asked Rachel.

"Yeah, um sure." Rachel said, putting down the other book, and grabbing the box off the floor. "I have more, my wedding, vacations, baby books, and just general years. It's kind of my stress release." Rachel said while pulling out some various books. "That's Lola's baby book, she is my tiny baby."

"She looks a lot like you," Shelby said "Alianna does too, but Lola, she is you, your fathers would send me pictures, and videos of your recitals, and she is the spitting image of you even when she was a newborn, that I especially remember," she told Rachel flipping through pictures of firsts- steps, haircuts teeth.

"My fathers say that too," Rachel said toying with the ribbon dangling off of the scrapbook adorned with wedding photos.

"Do you see your dads often," Shelby asked closing the book, and picking up Ali's

"As much as we can the girls love their grandparents, and then they all of course eat the girls and Liam up." Rachel said. "It's just hard, they try to come out here, but my dads and Finns parents are both still working, and with us it's really hard to pack up three kids and drive twelve hours or said three kids through a crowded airport. "

"The girls," Shelby started to go into a little deeper discussion, "they don't know about me?"

"They," Rachel sighed, "they know of you. Adoption and parentage is a tricky subject for our family, the girls they understand that it takes a mother and a father to have a baby, and that the mom has a baby. It's hard because Ali started having questions when I was pregnant with Liam and then of course anything Ali knows Lola has to too, and with a family like ours the questions are different, so as soon as you explain about mommies and daddies, and how they have babies they immediately went to her cousins. Kurt, Finns brother if you remember, is gay, well he has two adopted twin with his husband. They wanted to know why their cousins had two daddies and no mommies, and we explained to them that sometimes mommies will give their babies to someone else to take care of so then they asked about my dads, so they know that I have a mommy who loves me very much who gave me to their grandpas, just like their cousins have." Rachel explained.

"It was very kind of you to name Lola after me," Shelby told her daughter. "I understand if you don't want them to know that I'm your mother, as a mother myself I wouldn't want Beth to have to go through something like that, and I know what you went through as a teenager with me," Shelby explained, "why hurt them because I was too much of a coward."

"Thank you for understanding," Rachel sighed, "How is Beth? She is with Noah I suppose?"

"Yeah, she is great, it's the first time she had been to New York since he moved here, and normally he comes out to visit her, it's a little weird how he lives so close to you know?" Shelby said almost posing a question.

"Well yeah, but what can you do, he is very good with the boys." Rachel smiled; almost five years ago Puck had (another) nasty split with Quinn resulting in him deciding to move to New York, where he slept with Rachel's best friend and got her pregnant, he was now living down the street with Lacie, her son (a result of a bad relationship when she was still in college), and their other two sons. "How often does Beth see Quinn?"

"Quinn reduced her visits with Beth drastically even when she started seeing Noah again, but there would be times when Noah would come alone, she knew they were together, and he kept making excuses, it's really awful how she went from about three times a year to once, while Noah tried to see her every other month it not every month. When Noah moved here, I decided there was no need for us to stay in Ohio, if she was only seeing Quinn once a year, they see each other about every two years, it really hurts Beth that Quinn is like that but I really think Noah compensate fairly well, he still managed to see her about four times a year." Shelby explained her own complicated family situation.

"Where do you live now?

"Maryland," Shelby told Rachel while picking up another album. "It's nice there, I have a good job, Beth is happy. When we lived in Ohio is was too hard. Too painful,"

"Why now, why come now" Rachel asked quietly, "because there have literally been graduations, weddings, opening nights, births, and birthdays, why now?

"I would like to say 'I've been busy,' or 'The timing was never right' because those make me sound like less of a coward than I just was afraid of if you'd want me there." Shelby looked at Rachel. "I'm really sorry, Rachel."

"I understand," Rachel spoke her eyes to the floor,

"You're a lot like me you know?" Shelby proposed.

"I think you wrong," Rachel said her voice slightly raised. "I would never give my daughters or Liam up, I would never not want my children,"

"Rachel I thought we've been through this? I did what was best for you." Shelby sighed.

"What if it wasn't, I've never had a mother. Sometimes I feel like I don't know how to be a mother because I never had the example." Rachel nearly whispered the last part.

"Sweetie, you don't need a mother to be a mother, when the first time you heard Alianna cry what did you think?" Shelby asked.

"I mean I was pretty drugged up, and tired but I think I just wanted to hold her and take care of her." Rachel responded.

"And the first time she stood up, and took her first steps just to fall back down and scream?" Shelby encouraged.

"I kissed her all over and cuddled with her until she was ready to try again" Rachel smiled at the memory of her stubborn first born.

"You know how to be a mother, I kind of think that why woman have the babies." Shelby laughed at her joke, "And your fathers were great parents, who raised an amazing girl when I couldn't" She sympathized, "Is this your wedding?" She asked changing the subject to the white lacy album.

"Mhmm," She said taking a sip of her coffee, while Shelby opened the album that revealed Rachel's favorite photo from that night, of her and Finn kissing with the Cincinnati skyline behind them.

"Oh that's so lovely. You looked beautiful Rachel," Shelby admired flipping through the photos of Finn and Rachel, the before the wedding photos, the pictures of the wedding party, the ones of Rachel walking down the aisle, them at the altar, the reception, it all really was so pretty. "Such a wonderful day," she smiled.

"Thanks," Rachel said semi flatly realizing all the things her mother has missed.

"You know I was there for more than you think," Shelby, sighed. "Even when you were little, your dad's invited me to a few of your recitals, then as an adult, I found myself at your college graduation, your shows. You were amazing, as Fanny, almost better than Barbra," Shelby smiled.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" Rachel questioned, "That you just decided I was only good enough for you to see me, that you didn't need to talk to me or support me more than buying a ticket and sitting in the back like a coward. I could care less about my stupid shows, my dreams changed. You weren't there for what really mattered, my wedding, the birth of my children, watching them get older and bigger. You missed soo much when I was growing up, and now you cannot just come here now and tell me that, I don't know what you think you want, but I'll tell you this you will not be part of my children's. And, and," Rachel stuttered, "I think you should leave" She finished, pointing to the way out of her home.

"I'm really sorry Rachel," Shelby said grabbing her bag and getting up to leave.

"I'm sorry this isn't what you expected." Rachel said with tears in her eyes, as her mother left. She sat back down at the table beginning to cry harder, she eventually composed herself to go down to the basement where her daughters, son, and husband were congregated.

"Hey," Finn whispered over snow white singing to birds, stretched out on the couch with a sleeping Liam perched on his chest.

"Hi Mommy," the girls said in unison from their father's leather recliner he had owned since he was in college.

"What a great choice," Rachel mused at the movie choice, knowing Finn complained they watched the same few movies. She plopped on the floor, her back leaning on couch, her head inches away from Finns'.

"Are you ok, you look like you've been crying?" Finn whispered concerned.

"I'm fine, I'll tell you later." She whispered back.

"And Shelby left?" Finn questioned.

"Yes," Rachel said flatly in return.

…

Later that night, once all three children were asleep, the still seemingly young couple lay in bed. Finn rubbing circles on his wife's back as she cried into his shirt.

"She just told me all this stuff, it was awful, she thinks she can get away with coming here after all these years, after all I, we've been through." She groaned while Finn tried to comfort her.

"Babe, she is not worth it, sweetie please," Finn groaned.

"You know what," Rachel said sitting up sniffling a little bit and pulling a tissue from her nightstand to dry her tears. "She's not worth the pain, I think I've done just fine without her all these years." She got out of bed with her hands on her hips. "I need to go do something."

"Ok?" Finn questioned as she marched out of the bedroom, Finn groaned and grabbed his phone off the bedside table, "Hey Puck, its Finn. Do you know the hotel Shelby and Beth are staying at?"

…..

Knock, Knock

"Coming" … "Hello?"

"Did you know when Rachel was little she would draw pictures of what she imagined her mother would be like, and then in the first grade when she learned how to write, she wrote these stories about who her mother was and why she wasn't there, and on mother's days she would make these cards, but her Dads never sent them, I know all this because when her Dads moved I helped them clean all their stuff out of their attic. And in high school after you rejected her I had to tell her that you adopted Beth and moved away, and she locked herself up in her room for like a week. And then her senior year when you came back we both failed, well she got a C but I got an F, because she spent the whole night she reserved for studying, crying into my arms. And after again you left she almost didn't send her college applications. Then when it came time for her graduation from college, she almost sent you an invitation, then again to our wedding, and then she had these birth announcements for our children that got sent out, they are all in a box in her closet, along with some letters that date back to Middle school that she never sent. I'm telling you all this because Rachel doesn't let a lot of people know this, I think I might be the only one, that knows just how much you mess her up." Finn ranted off standing in the door way of the hotel room.

"Do you want to come in?" Shelby asked.

"Sure," Finn sighed, he took the baby car seat he was toting with him. "I cannot stay long, Ali has a soccer game, that is where Rachel is now, she had practice before it, but I said I would take the baby on my errands. So yeah, she doesn't know I'm here."

"Ok, so are you here just to make me feel worse than I already do?" Shelby questioned her arms across her chest.

"No, I just need you to understand why it wasn't a good idea just to show up yesterday." Finn said with the carrier on the ground and his hands in his pocket.

"Ok I understand that," Shelby said with slight animosity, "So are you done?"

"I've said I'll I feel I needed to say. If that's what you mean?" Finn said.

"Then maybe if you don't mind you could leave." Shelby said.

"Mom is room service here yet?" A tired bed head ridden Beth walked out of the room where the beds were, however upon noticing their guest she rushed back into the room and slammed the door.

"She looks a lot like Quinn," Finn said mouth slightly agape.

"We don't discuss her in this house, or hotel" Shelby said with a rigid mouth.

"Who don't we discuss? The wicked witch of the west?"

"Beth we do not refer to your mother like that," Shelby scolded.