Setting the Record Straight

I don't own Peter Pan. If I did, I would, in fact, be The Great Ormond Street Hospital.

This is a Kinda-If-You-Want-It-To-Be Prequel to Wendynapped.

"I am not in love with Wendy Moira Angela Darling," Peter Pan said to the therapist, who was, in point of fact, one of the new Lost Boy, who was named Guppy, of all things, with a derby hat on his head.

"Um, sir…" Guppy said timidly.

"I can barely even remember her name. As a matter of fact, I don't think that we've ever had a romantic moment," he continued, "I mean, it's not like that moment where our faces were inches apart on her last adventure here was tense."

"Sir…"

"And I definitely don't miss looking at her brown hair or her beautiful blue eyes. That would be crazy. Even if her eyes are the most beautiful blue that ever existed. That doesn't mean anything."

"Sir…"

"And I most definitely don't want to experience another thimble. It wasn't so great that I couldn't think, let alone breathe when she did it. And I certainly didn't watch her while she would cook."

"Sir…"

"And she definitely isn't on my mind all of the time. She just happens to somehow get into a conversation every time I'm talking to anyone"

"SIR!" Guppy shouted, unusually loud for the shy Lost Boy.

"What?" Peter asked, confused by the boy's sudden out of character shout.

"Can we get back to the questions, sir?" Guppy asked, his voice soft again, "As I asked before your rant, sir, 'How has your day been going, sir?'"

"Actually, Guppy, I think that I'm going to go see Wendy," Peter said, flying to England.

"Well," Guppy thought, "At least we'll get to see our 'mother'. Heck, maybe, if we're lucky, she'll stay this time."