A/N: This is for a fic exchange between me and my friend/beta-reader, Musard. I even threw in the cake.

Warnings: Lemon (this is the non-explicit version. The explicit version is linked on my profile), Yaoi, general Squabel kinkiness. Forgive me, I'm feeling sort of lazy right now. Just read on.

This is set TYL after the whole Byakuran bullshit. I give not a single fuck about all that parallel universe mumbo-jumbo. They're older. That's that.

Disclaimer: Sushi*Bomb does not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn. Wish I did, but whatever.

Let Them Eat Cake

Squalo may have been the current Sword Emperor, Second in command of the most elite assassination squad in the entire mafia, a brilliant strategist, and every other hard earned title and honor he had under his belt, but he was most certainly still a human being above all else.

And like the rest of humankind, Squalo had his own guilty pleasures.

They all did, really. Everyone in the Varia had their vices, their own secret loves and habits that kept them sane (or as sane as they could be, anyway). Some of them were fairly open about their guilty pleasures. It was no secret that Xanxus loved drinking. The man could easily knock out two bottles of tequila if given the opportunity. Three if he was in an especially nasty mood, or if it was holiday.

Lussuria was a self-confessed shopaholic. When he was upset or stressed about something, it wasn't uncommon for the Muay Thai expert to leave for the day and return with easily over three grand worth of clothes, shoes, and other acccessories.

Levi happened to really enjoy gardening. He was often seen around the Varia estate, mowing the grass, or prining a bed of flowers. No one really made fun of him for it, because Levi was surprisingly good at landscaping, and they all knew that if he didn't do it, none of them sure as hell would.

Others were a bit more…discreet.

It seemed that around the same time every month, Fran had a habit of disappearing for a day or two. The young illusionist would hole up in his room, and no one was allowed to enter. Squalo had heard from Lussuria that Fran had a rather dangerous habit of mixing pills and weed, because once in a while, his mind would just go haywire, and a heavy dose of cannabis and Xanax was the only thing that helped calm him down.

Belphegor had a particularly obnoxious habit of randomly wandering about the castle at odd hours of the night, searching for lone grunts and sadistically slitting their throats with a hissing chuckle before casually flitting off.

Then again, Squalo thought, that couldn't really be classified as a 'guilty' pleasure, since Belphegor couldn't care less about leaving mutilated corpses lying around the mansion and the grounds outside, and he certainly didn't feel any guilt about killing so needlessly. Prince the Ripper lived to kill.

Besides, Squalo himself knew what Bel's true guilty pleasure was, and that knowledge was something Bel had entrusted only a few select people with, him being one of them.

And Squalo himself?

Simple.

Black Velvet Cake.

Which was what he was currently on his way to the kitchen at this preposterous hour to snag for himself. Squalo wasn't someone who necessarily had a sweet tooth, especially at three in the morning, but…

… Goddamn was that cake amazing.

Two decadent layers of rich German chocolate, sinfully entwined with two layers of creamy cheesecake and topped with thick, whipped dark chocolate frosting that was generously sprinkled with broken ribbons of expensive swiss chocolate.

It was just one of the many culinary brainchilds of their resident sun guardian and master chef Lussuria, who painstakingly slaved over his creation all day, and happily served it at dinner earlier that evening. He looked on with a tired smile as his loving comrades nearly got into fist fights over the first slice, that battle finally being decided when Xanxus started firing bullets.

Squalo knew that Lussuria knew about his late night treks to the kitchen for something sweet. Lussuria was just a mother hen like that, in the fact that he knew all of the juicy private details about all of them.

Not that Squalo really cared or anything.

At the current moment, he cared more about the nice piece of cake that he knew Lussuria had secretly stashed away in the back of the fridge specifically for him that was waiting like a nude seductress in his bed.

Squalo bit his lip.

He wouldn't be surprised if he randomly popped one while eating. That cake was amazing enough to invoke sexual desires in anyone, let alone himself.

The swordsman felt himself begin to walk about a bit faster when the kitchen was in sight. He wandered inside, absently feeling along the wall for the light switch.

"Don't turn the light on, Squ-chan."

If Squalo wasn't as prideful as he was, he would've outright jumped at the familiar voice coming from further in the kitchen. But as such, the swordsman merely sucked his teeth in annoyance at the fact that he had company on his late night cake binge. Squalo narrowed his eyes, searching the dark room. He could barely make out the silhouette sitting at the island.

"Bel…what the fuck are you doing sitting in the goddamn dark?" Squalo snapped as he spitefully flipped the light switch, illuminating the entire kitchen. The blonde prince sitting at the island hissed as he shielded his eyes from the light, mumbling a lengthy string of expletives as he did so.

"Fuck Squalo! The kitchen lights are so bright. Why'd you have to turn them on? Can't you see in the dark?" Belphegor groaned. After several seconds, he set his hand back on the tall glass of ice water on the table's surface in front of him, his eyes apparently having already adjusted to the light.

Squalo scoffed as he walked to the refrigerator, glaring at the younger assassin as he walked by.

"Tch, of course I can see. But if it's all the same to your dumb ass, I'd rather not eat in the dark." He snapped as he opened one of the refrigerator doors and peered inside, moving several random items aside to get to the chocolately prize stashed away in the back. His frown morphed into a shark-like grin as his steely eyes settled on the four-tiered chocolate orgasm on a plate, sitting innocently next to a container of some sort of sauce.

"Come to papa!" Squalo said a little too giddily for someone who was supposed to be a feared swordsman and assassin as he settled himself in a seat opposite from Belphegor, rubbing his hands together in anticipation.

He heard the prince in front of him make a strangled noise.

"There was more cake?" He squeaked, licking his lips as he stared unabashedly in the direction of the enticing slice of heaven on the plate in front of Squalo. The swordsman smirked haughtily.

"Nope. This was the last piece. Luss stashed it away just for me." Squalo said snarkily as he took a big, obnoxious bite, just for the satisfaction of watching Bel's mouth hang open in desire.

He held back a chuckle as he heard the younger hitman whimper quietly.

"Something the matter, brat?" Squalo sneered. Belphegor frowned. He stood up and walked over to Squalo's side of the table, reaching for the plate.

"Gimme a bite of that cake, asshole." The blonde snapped. Squalo scoffed as he pulled the plate closer to himself.

"Fuck you brat, it's my cake." Squalo said back as he took another huge bite, making sure to exaggerate every action, just to piss Bel off. And it seemed to be working, if the conspicuous deepening of the prince's frown was anything to go by.

"Squ-chan…" Bel whined as he leaned down and wrapped his sinewy arms around Squalo's neck, nuzzling his nose into the swordsman's hair.

"Wha?" Squalo griped as he tried to push Bel off of him. He was wise to the prince's tricks. He knew that Bel was going to make a swipe at the plate as soon as he thought he had a chance. Well it wasn't going to work.

"Gimme a bite, Squ! Don't be greedy!" Belphegor bemoaned as he promptly swung a leg around Squalo's waist and settled himself in the swordsman's lap, making sure to grind against him teasingly as he did so, smirking to himself when he heard Squalo's breathing hitch.

"Would you get the hell off? I'm trying to enjoy my cake here, if you don't fucking mind." Squalo growled as he shoved Bel aside to spoon off another hearty piece of one of the cheesecake layers. If anything, Bel's hold on him tightened, the prince wrapping his long legs around Squalo's waist and the back of the chair so that he wouldn't fall to the floor, while simultaneously bringing him closer to the swordsman.

"But Squalo," He began repugnantly, "I do mind. I want some too, you cake hog." He snapped at Squalo, who ignored him as he nonchalantly took another luxurious bite. Squalo turned to him as he slowly licked some frosting off of the spoon with a toothy smirk, as if to say 'ha ha!'

But at that moment, Belphegor's eyes were entirely focused on the small speck of dark frosting on the side of Squalo's bottom lip. Squalo suddenly got the feeling Bel was staring at him.

"What?" He snapped at the younger man wrapped around him, but he was ignored. Bel made a little noise that sounded like a cross between a squeak and a moan as a tiny smirk slid easily onto his pale face. The prince leaned closer as he slid a hand against Squalo's face, pulling the older man towards him.

"Voi! What the hell are you-" Squalo was promptly silenced as Bel leaned in and in one teasingly fluid motion, licked the frosting away. His tongue was cold; he had been absently sucking on an ice cube before Squalo made his appearance in the kitchen. Squalo shivered involuntarily as the slick appendage slid languorously across his bottom lip, savoring the taste of the rich cream with a giddy 'mmm.'

"God that frosting is so fucking good…" Bel said huskily as he pulled away, snickering at the red flush erupting over Squalo's cheeks.

"Fucking hell! Don't lick me!" The swordsman barked when he snapped out of his daze. Belphegor laughed again. "Well you won't share with me, so I guess I'll just have to settle for leftovers."

Squalo gave him a withering glare.

"Come on Squalo, sharing is caring. Now give the prince some cake." Bel said with an 'innocent' smile. Squalo stared at him with a deadpanned expression for several second before finally sighing.

"Fine. I'll share." He ground out. Belphegor's trademark grin snaked its way onto his face.

"I knew you'd give in eventually!"

"Yeah, yeah just go grab a spoon." Squalo said as he rolled his eyes. But Bel didn't budge. Squalo turned back to him. "Well? I thought you wanted some?"

"Feed it to me." Bel said simply.

Squalo's face puckered in disbelief. "What?" He snapped.

Belphegor just smiled as he reached back behind him to grab the plate of half eaten cake off of the table. "I don't feel like getting a spoon, because that would require getting up. And the prince is quite comfy here." The blonde said as he rocked a bit on Squalo's lap to reiterate his point, smiling inwardly at the way Squalo's breathing unconsciously quickened at the motion.

"So you're gonna sit on me like a fucking five year-old, and I have to feed you too?" Squalo asked, his voice a bit strained. Bel bit his lip. "I'll feed you too, Squ-chan." He said teasingly.

"I am perfectly capable of feeding myself, thank you very much." Squalo growled, his frown growing when Belphegor laughed again.

"Oh come on, don't be like that Squalo! Open up!" Bel chimed as he scooped some of the cake and brought it up to Squalo's pursed lips.

"Open your mouth."

Squalo glared fiercely as he shook his head. Bel's smile faded into a small frown.

"Open."

Squalo shook his head again.

Belphegor made an irritated noise. "Fine. I'll eat this bite then." Bel said hotly. The prince popped the spoon in his mouth, making little 'mmm' noises as he savored the taste of the rich, decadent dessert on his tongue. He felt Squalo's grip on his waist tighten.

The prince pulled the spoon out of his mouth slowly as his hidden eyes focused on Squalo's slightly darkening eyes, letting his tongue glide tantalizingly over the back of the spoon, lapping up the excess frosting.

"Yes?" He asked huskily as he spooned more of the indulgent dessert onto the spoon. Squalo didn't say anything. Belphgor lifted the spoon back to Squalo's mouth. This time, he was met with no resistance as Squalo's lips parted in silent obedience, letting the spoon slip in unhindered and closed his lips over it, not once taking his eyes off of the smirking blonde sitting in his lap.

Bel suddenly felt a hand close over his. Squalo slid the spoon out of the younger man's slackened grip, taking his time in pulling the spoon back out of his mouth, a small smirk snaking it's way onto his pale face. Squalo knew that behind that veil of shaggy blonde hair, Bel's piercing grey eyes were darkening with lust too.

"Open up." Squalo said quietly as he gathered a big chunk of frosting. Belphegor obediently opened his mouth, allowing the older man to slide the spoon into his mouth. Bel smiled alluringly as he let his eyes drift closed, moaning lowly in delight. He felt his own pulse begin to quicken as a hand crept around his back. The curious appendage slid down into his sleeping pants and cupped one of his pert cheeks, giving it a rough squeeze.

Bel groaned at the sudden pain, his legs unconsciously tightening around Squalo's waist. Down between them, he could feel their growing erections nudging together through the thin materials of their respective sleepwear, the delicious friction making the room seem ten degees warmer.

They both knew where this was heading.

But they both also knew that the other had a sadomasochistic streak that they weren't too ashamed to hide. Not from each other. It was their guilty pleasure. Drawing out this torturous little game.

Suddenly, the three or so bites left of Lussuria's luxurious Black Velvet cake seemed like a whole new cake fresh out of the oven. Neither of them was certain they could hold out that long, but …

…well…

…pretending to have self-control was half the fun.

Doing his best to ignore both the throbbing of his straining arousal, as well as the skilled hand kneeding his firm globe, Belphegor took the spoon back from Squalo. He shakily sectioned off another piece of the cake, and raised it to Squalo's lips. The older man's lips parted silently, one of the corners upturned in a teasing smirk as he took the spoon in his mouth, groaning softly at the way the rich dessert melted on his tongue.

Not to mention the way Bel was melting in his lap.

The younger man was clutching painfully at one of Squalo's bare shoulders, his breath coming out in shallow pants. He ran a curious finger over Squalo's lips, to which the older man responded by placing a seductively innocent kiss on the soft fingertips, smirking when Bel bit his lip with a low moan.

This was Squalo's favorite part.

He loved seeing the usually haughty and manipulative prince respond so viscerally to him. This was a side of the blonde that only Squalo was allowed to see, and Squalo took full advantage of that privilege.

Belphegor was, to be blunt, a bit of a whore.

The only thing Bel enjoyed more than killing was a good, hard fuck, and as he grew older, that promiscuous nature that had been developing from early adolescence became unbearably apparent to the other members of the Varia. Bel was insatiable in his need for carnal satisfaction. He had screwed a decent portion of the grunts he felt were attractive enough to satisfy his discerning taste, and often brought both men and women home sometimes when they went out partying.

But Squalo knew better than to confuse the situation.

He knew damn well that Belphegor wasn't just out screwing and blowing everyone in sight like a horny, brainless animal in heat. Bel was a cold, calculating person under that obscene, shit-eating grin of his, and more often than not, sex was just another means to an end.

Belphegor was beautiful and he knew it, and he often used that to his advantage. The genius prince loved the thrill of the hunt; he loved knowing that he could seduce anyone without putting a great deal of effort into it. Truthfully, that little talent Bel had for seduction had gotten them out of an untold number of sticky situations.

But most of all, Belphegor loved mind games. Ultimately, it was the challenge of getting into someone's head and twisting them to his satisfaction that got Bel off harder than any one person could. Bel was analytical by nature, and he enjoyed probing people and trying to figure them out. And he was good at it too.

He had seen Bel do it to countless people.

To a couple of the Vongola brats, particularly the Decimo's right hand man, who was known to be a bit of a brain himself. But comparatively, he fell short in the fact that he was naïve, and ultimately, Belphegor had his way with him many times before sending him packing like some common whore.

When Fran first joined the Varia, he was a very different person than the blank-faced, sarcastic sidekick he was now. When he was first delivered to them, Fran was a fragile, callous, recovering heroin addict fresh out of rehab in Switzerland. Despite this, Bel had been completely fascinated by the boy's sharp wit and seeming asexuality.

But as the months wore on, Belphegor probed his new illusionist for any weakness, mental or physical (which resulted in his fetish for stabbing Fran, since years of drug abuse had fried the illusionist's nerves to near nothingness and he didn't really feel anything). And after sometime, he figured out that Fran wasn't as impenetrable as he seemed.

You just had to know what buttons to push, that was all.

Squalo was certain that at one point, he had made even Xanxus, the most macho meathead on the face of the earth, question his sexuality. How he did that the swordsman was unsure, but given the fact that he had seen Bel seduce guns out of the hands of men bigger than Levi, he didn't doubt it one bit.

But with him, Bel was completely different.

Truthfully, he too had fallen victim to Bel's manipulative games in the past. But what Bel didn't know was that Squalo himself also had a secret knack for fucking with people's heads, when he really needed too. In the end, that had intrigued the blonde even further.

The two of them shared a unique bond that Squalo would never even attempt to put into plausible thought. They weren't friends, but they weren't really lovers either. They fucked a lot, that was certain, and Belphegor trusted him to a degree that could almost be mistaken for love, be it not for the fact that Bel was a certified maniac, and probably wouldn't understand the concept of love if Aphrodite herself descended down from Olympia and made crazy, passionate love to him.

When they were together though, Bel was just…different. Squalo couldn't really explain it. It was just something in the way the prince's demeanor shifted. The way he allowed his guard to completely shatter and the needy, selfish child that Bel really was came out. The way he came undone so shamelessly under Squalo's wonderful ministrations when they had sex; just everything, really.

Bel wasn't afraid to be clingy, to make his true needs and desires apparent, and most of all, he loved being able to lose control of himself without worrying if someone was going to use it against him.

Belphegor craved attention and affection, unorthodox as his means of achieving those needs were. And right now, Bel was radiating nothing but pure, unadulterated need.

As such, Squalo made a hell of a show out of pulling the spoon back out of his mouth, smacking his lips together teasingly as he gave Bel's ass another hard squeeze. The younger man leaned against his bare chest, moaning into the taut flesh of the older man's neck.

"…Fuck…" Bel gasped, "Squalo…please…" he whimpered into Squalo's neck, alternately nipping and sucking the pale skin.

It took every ounce of control Squalo had not to throw the plate somewhere and slam Bel onto the table and screw him senseless right then and there. It was rare for Bel to crack so quickly, if ever. Squalo wondered absently if perhaps Lussuria had put something in the cake.

He allowed himself a small chuckle.

"Mm-mm. You're the one who wanted to share the cake, and we're going to finish it. Now open up." He said mockingly as he pushed the loaded spoon against Bel's plump bottom lip. The blonde's lips parted at the silent command, breaths coming in shallow pants as he sucked the bit of dessert right off of the spoon, savoring it puckishly slow while casually brushing his bangs aside, revealing his half-lidded eyes to the older man.

Squalo's hold on him tightened almost instantaneously.

It was Bel's turn to snicker as he scraped the last bit of cake off of the plate and poked the spoon against Squalo's lips.

"Last piece, Ushishi~!" He said with a small grin. But under that grin, Squalo could see the unbridled anticipation nearly boiling over. He was certain Belphegor could see it written all over his face too. Squalo let his mouth open just enough to let the spoon enter, not once breaking eye contact with the prince perched in his lap as he ate the last little bit of the wondrous cake.

With an exaggerated swallow, Squalo leaned back in his seat, his face oddly unreadable. He watched as Bel gingerly took the spoon back, pointedly avoiding eye contact with the older man.

Squalo almost laughed.

There was something decidedly comical about the way Bel sometimes tried to play the part of the innocent virgin, with the coy smiles and shy glances.

But admittedly, it made Squalo want to screw him that much harder. Innocent his ass.

"I should put this away first." Bel said absently as he swung his leg back over and stood up to deposit the now empty plate in the sink. But not before sending Squalo another 'look' over his shoulder.

And it was that one look that made Squalo nearly come in his pants.

The shy, innocent stare that quickly turned into the seductive, 'come hither' bedroom eyes.

The plate never made it to the sink.

Instead, it sat on the tile floor, shattered and forgotten not five feet from its intended destination. Neither of them gave a damn.

The two were wrapped up in a whirlwind of heated touches, passionate, frenzied kisses, and ripping each others clothes off as quickly as time would permit. Words weren't needed at this point. Their eyes, hands, and moans did all of the talking for them.

Squalo took Bel right there in the kitchen.

It was too much of a hassle to take this heated exchange to one of their bedrooms (they doubted they'd make it that far anyway). Not to mention Bel was something of an exhibitionist; the risk that someone might walk in on them fueled his already inexhaustible sex drive, and what a treat it would have been for any of the other members of the Varia to walk in on Xanxus' right hand man with his pants around his ankles, with their resident prince slammed up against the fridge with his legs around Squalo's waist as he fucked the blonde into a higher plane of existence.

When they were close, Squalo carried the younger man back to the seat they had been occupying previously. There, in the same exact position they had shared that decadent dessert in before, they were sharing an entirely new treat of equal if not greater decadence than before.

Squalo loved it when Bel rode him.

He wasn't sure if it was because of the way Bel just surrendered himself so fully to his senses, leaving himself completely exposed and vulnerable in a way he would never allow with others, or inversely, if it was because he gave the prince total control to set the pace.

In either case, Bel was a passionate lover. He loved long, deep kisses and heated caresses along his spine that made him shiver. When Bel moved on top of him, he did so in a manner that Squalo could only describe as undulate and serpentine. The prince's technique was one that spoke of a little too much experience and it made Squalo's eyes nearly roll back in his head from the sheer sensation alone. Even more so when Bel would speed up more and more, clawing at his shoulders as he reached that moment of complete delirium and with a hitched breath and a low, lanugorous groan, would come crashing down, tipping them both over the edge.

It was perfect.

And here all Squalo had wanted was a midnight snack.

Hope you enjoyed it the eleventh time, Chloe!

As well as everyone else who took the time to read. If you liked it, a nice review would be much appreciated!

Ja~