"as far as I can tell there's nothing wrong with you…." the nurse lady (correction-the bane of my life lady) told me in a stern tone. "so why are you here?"
"I'm crazy." I whispered into my pillow. Or at least I felt that way. I figured that a mental hospital would make me realize how normal I am. It didn't really work. There was no one to talk to, and all the adults would ask me creepy questions. Like "how can you be crazy, you have a good life!"
I wanted to kill everyone.
But If I was in jail, I'd never see Freddie ever again.
How lucky for him.
The nurse just rolled her eyes at me. ROLLED THEM! Like a….rolling thing.
Fatshakes. I wanted fatshakes. The creamy-ness of them would fix me right up. Maybe I'd have 8 or 9 before I needed to be wheeled to the infirmary. Would Freddie be able to feel it if I were gone?
Scratch off the last bit. I don't think about him. I can't think about him….I'm not supposed to. The shrink says that if I keep dwelling on the past, I will never have an established future. He's my past. He is my past….
And I want him in the future.
NO! NO I DIDN'T! traitor thought bubble! Thinking to easily about everything! I hated him! He was a face in a sea of nubs and losers. SO WHY DID I WANT TO BE WITH HIM ALL THE TIME?
My mind was in a far-away place where the nub couldn't hurt me. So why was the warm feeling of tears starting to run down my cheeks?