A/N: An awkward Warblers fic! I'm dealing with some terrible writer's block on a couple of stories that I was working on, so I took a prompt from the kurt_blaine livejournal. I'm going to be trying to get back to more awkward Burt/Kurt/Blaine once I get over the whole not being able to create anything I like thing. This is admittedly not my favorite, but I really felt like I needed to put something out there. And just because I do it every time, you guys rule! Thanks for all the favorites/alerts/reviews, they're awesome!
Disclaimer: Glee is not mine.
Blaine, Wes, and David were walking down the hallway, just having finished with classes today. They were on their way to Warbler rehearsal when they decided to interrogate Blaine.
"So," Wes began, "you and Kurt?"
"Yes, we're together."
"Finally!" David high fived Wes. "You owe me ten bucks; you said they wouldn't get together until the summer. School year FOR THE WIN!"
"You guys were betting on my love life?" Blaine rolled his eyes at his best friends. "I don't know whether to be angry or amused."
"It was totally David's idea. He thought that it would be funny."
"You agreed!"
"Guys, guys, let's just stop this right now." Blaine stopped them in the middle of the hallway. "Now, please don't make Kurt feel uncomfortable, okay? He's just sort of gotten used to you all, and I really don't think that he could take you guys grilling him about us."
Both Wes and David looked a bit crestfallen, and then David perked up and whispered something into Wes's ear.
"Brilliant!" Wes shrieked.
"What's brilliant?" Blaine was looking very confused.
"Well," David smiled mischievously; we've decided to dedicate the next Warbler movie night to you and Kurt. Consider it our…dating present?"
"Well guys, I'm flattered, but I think that you might scare Kurt a little, you two are pretty intense."
"Us?" David looked at Blaine, mock-offended. "Blaine, we want to do this so that you two feel the full support of the Warblers. We want our newest power couple to thrive."
"Okay, I guess…but make sure to pick good movies!"
"What about this one?" David was holding up a movie with two very burly men on the front. "It's called Dirty Daddies-do you think they'd like this one?"
"Can you please tell me why we're looking at gay porn?" Wes looked like he would rather be anywhere but a seedy adult store with his best friend, who was a little too enthusiastic about this.
"No, I don't think that one's good," David placed it back on the shelf, "and we're doing this to help Kurt and Blaine! They're practically Victorian in their chastity. We need to…inspire them."
"So we're getting them porn," Wes looked puzzled, "so that they'll have sex? What goes on in your head?"
"Lots of stuff! Ooo, how about this one? It's called Terrific Twinks 3-they look more like Kurt and Blaine!"
"I cannot believe you're doing this. You are picking out porn for one of our best friends so that he'll have sex with his boyfriend of ONE week."
"It would certainly make both of them less depressed about losing at Regionals. Plus, have you seen the intense eye-fucking that goes on in rehearsals? They both want this, you know it."
"No, I don't. There's a difference between undressing someone with your eyes and having crazy sex with them," Wes retorted, "and are we just going to give these to him? Like, 'here Blaine, we think you and Kurt should totally get busy, so here's some porn?'"
"No," smiled David, "Warbler's movie night! It would be perfect!"
"No! We are not watching porn at the movie night!"
"We've done it before-I think we all enjoyed 'Pirates' a great deal…"
"Okay, but this is gay porn," Wes replied, "and Blaine said not to make Kurt uncomfortable! This is the very definition of uncomfortable!"
"You know what, I think these three will do-then if we don't like one, we can always put in another. I do have to admit that Terrific Twinks 3 does look promising, but we have Island Boy Bed Hopper and whatever this one is. I chose it because it takes place in an igloo. That sounds exotic and erotic."
They walked up to the register, where they were given an odd look by the guy ringing them up. They ran out of the store and made a quick getaway when Wes turned towards David.
"Blaine is going to kill us. He is going to murder us and bury us on the school grounds. I hope you realize what you're doing David."
"I really hope they don't think that they have to choose all LGBT movies on our account." Kurt was worried about the night. "I don't want anyone to be uncomfortable."
"Don't worry," Blaine said, grabbing Kurt's hand, "it will all be okay. I warned them not to do anything too stupid."
They walked into the commons where Wes and David had set up the projector. Most of the Warblers were milling about the room, chatting quietly when David gave a whistle.
"So," he started, "tonight's movie night is dedicated to our new power couple: Kurt and Blaine! Take a bow, gentleman."
Kurt and Blaine stood up and took a bow while the other Warblers catcalled and clapped. They both sat down on a couch, blushing fiercely.
"Now," David continued, "Wes and I have picked out some very awesome movies that we're sure they'll enjoy. Wes, dim the lights! We now present Terrific Twinks 3!"
Kurt looked at Blaine, who had blushed bright red, "What's a twink?"
"You'll see," Blaine gulped, squeezing Kurt's hand "this is not going to be good."
The movie started innocently enough, with an island backdrop.
"This isn't so bad," Kurt whispered, "I don't see what you were so upset about!"
"Just wait," Blaine murmured, "I can't believe those two!"
Then Kurt saw why Blaine was acting the way he was. The one guy was now on his knees in front of the other and had proceeded to start giving him a blow job. Kurt was bright red, and the rest of the Warblers, with the exception of Blaine, were looking at him and snickering.
Blaine cleared his throat. "Wes, David? Take the damn DVD out now!"
"You didn't like that one?" David sounded disappointed. "We have a couple others…I really thought you'd like that one though."
"No, I didn't," Blaine replied angrily, "why would you think that we wanted to watch porn with you guys?"
"Well, we thought maybe you guys needed help picking up some moves-we were trying to be supportive!"
"This was you being supportive? You sat all of the Warblers down to watch gay porn!"
Kurt was bright red, but he attempted to speak. "I really appreciate you guys trying to be supportive…but could we watch something different? I need to be able to look you all in the eye after this."
"Holy shit," one of the younger Warblers called out, "how can he hold him up like that? This is kinky!"
None of them had noticed that the movie was still playing, but after that exclamation, they all looked up and saw the larger man pinning the smaller man up against the wall and then proceeding to have sex with him. Kurt's eyes went wide, and Blaine thought that he was going to die.
"Blaine," Kurt murmured, "we need to go."
"Get some!" chorused three warblers.
"All of you," Blaine said, infuriated, "need to learn about boundaries! No porn at Warbler movie nights, how about that? Okay?"
With that, Blaine took Kurt's hand and they both practically sprinted out of the room.
Wes and David looked at each other, neither speaking.
"I told you this wouldn't work," Wes said, "but no…now our best friend hates us."
David looked at Wes for a moment, and then replied, "Do you think that they would have liked Brokeback Mountain better?"