Kurt played the whole scene over and over in his head that night. He was sitting cross legged at the end of Finn's bed while Finn sat on the floor playing Call of Duty. It was dusk and soon the only light that would fill the room would be that emanating from the television screen. A cool breeze blew in from the open window tickling the back of Kurt's neck causing goose bumps to form and creating the illusion of peace despite the atrocious sights and sounds produced by the death of a solider at the hands of his brother. He didn't really know how he had ended up in Finn's room, because lord knows video games were not his thing. Later, Kurt would conclude that the reason he had chosen to spend his time with his thoughts with Finn instead of alone, as one usually did, was because he needed something to anchor him. Something to remind him that he wasn't dreaming, that he was very much alive and awake and that he had, in fact, spent the afternoon with Blaine.

"Are you ok, dude? Did you need to talk about something?" Finn turned around and asked him for the second time now.

"No, I'm fine" Kurt replied absentmindedly.

There was a truth to these words. Kurt was ok, he was fine, there wasn't anything wrong. Kurt didn't want to talk to Finn, not that Finn hadn't become someone Kurt could talk to, someone he trusted. There just wasn't any desire, any need inside Kurt to talk. Kurt was content to just sit with Finn and let his mind wander back to the scene in the coffee shop that afternoon. Their coffee shop.

He had been so excited to see Blaine. The nationals trip and separated the pair five days and although those five days had been filled with some of the greatest experiences Kurt had ever had he still missed his best friend, his boyfriend, his Blaine. The second Kurt returned home from New York he sent Blaine a text.

To Blaine: coffee tomorrow at noon, i've got soooo much to tell you – K

To Kurt: can't wait, you better have some good gossip ;) After coffee do you want to help me sift through sheet music to find an audition song for that 6 flags gig? welcome home KK, i missed you – B

To Blaine: that sounds perfect i missed you too-K

He had practically skipped his way to the Lima Bean that morning in clad in his favourite pair of skinny jeans, they were turquoise, and a white button down with a checkerboard tie. When he arrived he found Blaine lying on the hood of his car with his arms above his head staring into the summer blue sky. It always amazed Kurt that Blaine could act so goofy, and care free, and child like and yet still be this perfect, put together, intelligent, well spoken, gentleman. Kurt loved that about Blaine, he had since the moment they met. Blaine's playful pose rubbing off on him, Kurt quietly sauntered up to the side of his car and leaned over the hood to whisper in his boyfriend's ear.

"Hey there handsome, come here often?"

Kurt didn't get a reply. Instead he was met with one of Blaine's most dazzling grins as the boy hopped off his car and wrapped his arms around him. Kurt returned the hug eagerly and the two of them had just stood there for a moment revelling in each other. It might be strange to others how important this hug was for Kurt but it was, it really was. Both Kurt and Blaine were weary of public displays of affection and so the fact that Blaine had hugged him in the first place was enough to fill Kurt's heart with joy. Even though they were fairly reserved by most people's standards, when they were in the safety of the Hummel house hold or when Kurt had still been at Dalton they were much more touchy feely but when out in the real world they would rarely even hold hands. Being wrapped in Blaine's arms also made Kurt feel safe, wanted, right, like he belonged in this world.

They had got their usual non-fat mocha latte and medium drip and sat down at the table for two that seemed to be right in the middle of the shop, their table. Kurt had often thought since they had actually started dating about why they didn't pick a more secluded spot but he concluded that it just didn't seem right to abandon it when it had been there for them from the beginning. There had been a few times where they had sat somewhere else, like when their friends joined them. It was ok when they were with others because but when it was just the two of then it was different and they had to have their table. One Tuesday afternoon it had been occupied by a young women typing away furiously on her lap top. He and Blaine had sat down at the adjacent table but as soon she left, without saying a word to each other, the two got up and returned to their rightful spot. It was just their thing.

It seemed to come out of nowhere, prompted by absolutely nothing. He had just been gushing on about nationals when Blaine had said it. It stunned Kurt, shocked him, shot him to the moon and beyond. He had not expected this, not then, and honestly not ever. It was a sad reality that he had practically given up on ever hearing those three words spoken to him, practically, but not completely. Seeing the honesty, adoration, and selflessness that shown through his boyfriends eyes as his declaration had slipped past his lips with ease had restored so much life into him that Kurt hadn't even realised he had lost. It took himself a moment to say it back but he wasn't really saying it back, he was saying it to Blaine. His Blaine. His boyfriend. His best friend. The gorgeous boy sitting in front of him who had intelligence and charisma like no other, had the ability to make him laugh and smile like no other, to take away and make him forget about the pain, to allow him to be who he was and encouraged nothing less, to make him feel strong and untouchable, to give him courage, to make him feel that something hadn't gone wrong with him, that he wasn't just born this way, he was meant to be this way so he could sit at their table with him. He loved Blaine in every sense of the word. He loved how Blaine had made something as huge and monumental as declaring their love for one another just easy, and effortless, and comfortable because that was the way they were. Nothing too over the top or fancy just two boys who only saw each other. It was simple. It was their thing. It was them.

Surprising to some perhaps but not to Kurt that their day carried on as normal as ever. Watching his brother corner another soldier in some back ally before blowing his head off made Kurt wonder if he had missed something. Finn had come to him several times before, agonising over the pressure he felt from Rachel or Quinn to say the "L" word and then the hidden meaning behind the word that everybody seemed to have a different definition for and the promises, the binding contracts, of what came next. It always changed the dynamic. It always seemed to cause some sort of explosion of heads and hearts and usually his patients. Maybe he was being naive but Kurt thought it would be different with him and Blaine. Their relationship was the same as ever just with the pleasure of a new word to add to their vocabulary. Blaine's declaration was not out of nowhere nor prompted by nothing. It came from that moment of bliss, of just being able to be happy together. It came from everything they had been through together and shared with each other over the past six months. It had come from a place of honesty, adoration, and selflessness that was not corrupted by outside expectation or pressure. There was no need for Kurt to sit and analyse the words that past through his and his boyfriend's lips that afternoon because there was nothing more or less to them then love itself. Yet Kurt still sat cross legged on Finn's bed replaying that scene in his head because he couldn't let it slip away. Their relationship was different than the ones Kurt saw everyday and not just because they were two boys. There was something less urgent about the way they were together, something more delicate, more gentile. The words spoken that afternoon were something Kurt would cherish forever. They bounded the couple together in a way that neither of them was ready to do physically but to Kurt that made those three words all the more powerful. To know that neither Blaine nor himself needed to be physical in order to realise that their feelings for each were real and true and more intimate than either had ever experienced before made Kurt's heart swell. They didn't need to conform to teenage norms, fall into the societal traps that had swallowed so many, including Finn. They could just move at their own pace, take their own road. Just be them.