Broken Colors

Richard had never been one for tears. He hated how they made his face feel and he hated how awkward they looked and the stares he got for wasting them. The more he hated them though, the more they came. Every birthday was dark and gloomy because he had no one to share his birth with. Every Christmas was torture because the snowy white blankets that coated the Manor lawn imprisoned him within the house to suffer through the heartless memories that were in the deepest corners of his mind that he always pushed away. Every Thanksgiving was pointless because he had nothing to be thankful for any longer.

Unlike the other holidays though, today Richard wasn't stuck with a man who wouldn't adopt him and a butler. Instead he was at Happy Harbor right outside Mt. Justice, hiding from his friends on the cliff face, sitting atop the tallest of rocks. His domino mask [1] sat alone in his lap, catching his heavy and warm tears as they fell from his deepest of light blue eyes. His breath was gentle, but ragged in the back of his throat, only thickening the tears and making his fragile heart race within his chest.

Today was the 4th of July. 5 years ago, he had been standing down at the local park, sitting on his mom's lap and holding his dad's hand, giggling wildly as the fireworks exploded brightly in the night sky, illuminated the wonder in his eyes and the love written deep in the creases of his parent's faces as they held him tight. Now, he sat cross-legged, nearly 1000 yards above the ocean on top of an unstable rock, waiting for Rhode Island to shoot off their fireworks as they sat giggling and grinning, completely oblivious to his pain.

Richard wanted to go home and watch fireworks, but every time he considered it, he was reminded of the cold truth that he didn't have a home any more. His home was being occupied by new members of the circus he had once happily performed in, the large G on his chest displayed proudly. Now, all that sat on his chest was a broken heart, covered by a baggy green t-shirt and a black jacket to shelter him from the cold. Richard weakly wrapped his arms around his stomach as the tears turned into quiet sobs. He was forced to remember that he couldn't see their faces in his mind anymore. They were just tan silhouettes.

He only remembered from the pictures he had, but they were faded now so it was all just a blur. That's all his past was to him; a big, never ending blur that masked its presence. Richard wanted to move to London or Africa or Mexico where they didn't celebrate the 4th of July. He wanted to become a Jehovah's Witness so he didn't have to celebrate anything. He wanted so much, but he couldn't have any of it. Instead, all he got were warm and heartbroken tears that would probably stain the area underneath his eyes. No one would see the pain though because of his many masks. Richard wished they could see though. He didn't want to be thought of as the boy who never frowned. He just wanted to be little Richard Grayson.

Richard tensed up and froze as he heard a rock slip and tumble, crashing to the ground, followed by a disoriented cry of surprise. He slipped his mask on over his eyes and clenched his teeth to hold off the painful sobs, calling his tiny muscular frame to quiver with effort. He looked over the edge of the rock and saw a familiar head of red hair scaling the rock. His blue eyes widened beneath the mask and he scrambled back to the other edge, his racing heart quickening in its pace. Wally knew that if anyone could see through his mental mask, it was Wally. Quick as he could, Richard took off his mask and angrily scrubbed at his mask, but as he did, he found he couldn't stop the tears.

Shit! If Wally sees me like this- Richard stopped thinking.

He forced himself up and ducked his head down, charging forward until he reached the edge of the rock, pressing his mask deep into the folds of his face. He pushed off hard on the rock and threw his head over his Nike sneakers, flipping swiftly off the rock and away from Wally.

"Hey! Rob!" he heard the redhead call energetically, but Richard didn't want to hear it.

The second his feet touched the ground, he ran as fast as his feet could carry him, causing the dirt to fly behind him, causing light dirt clouds. His tears gently slipped under a crack in his mask, blinding his vision, but he never slowed down. His breath returned to gentle sobs and his knees were screaming to give out as they shook wildly. In seconds, the sound of Wally's awkward running style filled his ears and he bit down hard on his lip and willed his feet to go faster, trying to think of happy and funny things to stop the tears. Nothing was working though.

"Rob! Dude! Seriously, slow down!" Wally screamed after him, his voice getting louder and nearer.

Richard ducked his head to the left as he sensed Wally coming up on his right, praying he'd grow some super speed of his own as the dirt turned to yellow sand. Richard never got further though as his foot connected with some unknown object hidden deep in the sand that threw his body forward, skidding him through the sand. The next second, Wally was knelt beside him. A soft hand touched to his shoulder and he felt worried eyes dig into his mask.

"Hey… what's wrong?" the voice was gentle and punctured the wounded bird's heart with a barbed hook.

Richard shrugged off the arm and sat up, scrubbing furiously at his eyes, praying the tears would fade, but they didn't.

"N-… Noth-…" Richard's voice gave out and he pulled his knees to his chest, setting his arms atop them and resting his forehead against them.

Wally sat beside him weakly, unsure of what to do. He didn't know the Boy Wonder even had the ability to cry. He had only seen him frown once or twice, but sadness wasn't something you saw on his face. Cautiously, trying out a simple idea, Wally set a weak arm around Richard, hugging his best friend comfortingly. Richard tensed, but it faded and he surrendered to the weak hug, dropping his knees a bit and moving his arms until just his elbows hit the tops. He tried to hide the tears from Wally, but the day-ginger [2] always noticed. He shook his head weakly.

"Don't hide 'em bro. It's only human to cry," he said gently, his voice barely above a whisper.

Richard frowned angrily, but the tears still hurt.

"I-I…" his voice cracked off and he let it face the Earth beneath him, "then I-I d-d-don't wanna be h-human!"

Wally's heart caught in his throat as he watched his best friend sob his own heart out. Protectively, he tightened the hug, rubbing Richard's shoulder gently.

"Want to talk about it?" he offered.

Richard shook his head madly, his ragged breath becoming heavier and heavier by the moment. Wally closed his eyes tight to avoid tears of his own.

"Holding it back won't do you any good. I can keep a secret," Wally promised.

He could tell Richard was considering it, but he was torn between something. Wally just waited as the sun continued to set, causing Richard's tears to gleam in its final lights.

"No…I…" Richard swallowed hard.

He got an angry look on his face and he weakly pushed Wally away, getting up and walking away slowly, his face contorted in pain. Wally didn't give up. He sped in front of Richard, blocking its path.

"I came down here to watch fireworks because Batman told me you'd be staying down here for the 4th of July and I didn't want you have to celebrate it alone. I could be at home with my family and my third cousin Anna, who is pretty freaking hot, and my second cousin Johnna who made some homemade vanilla ice cream and my Uncle James who gets the most awesome fireworks that are probably illegal but they're fun to watch!" Wally told his friend, his eyes full of hurt.

Richard brushed past him weakly.

"Then go home. I don't need company. I can handle myself," he sobbed gently, trying his hardest to sound mad.

He failed though, and his pain shone through bright as the setting sun's rays as the shone in their last moments. Richard didn't get far before he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"If I wanted to go home, don't you think I'd be there? I came down here to celebrate the 4th of July with you. Now grow some balls and come on; we have some fireworks to shoot off."

Richard turned around, eyebrows furrowed. Wally looked angry almost, but it was barely visible. The two stood there staring at each other for the longest time, neither saying anything until the area around them was dark and shaded, the moonlight taking over the sky.

"Are you coming or not?" Wally asked, his voice hard.

Richard nodded, his breath slow and calm in his chest, the tears drying up. He turned around and followed Wally back to the rock he had been sitting on before where a large cardboard box sat, brimming to the top with objects Richard assumed were fireworks. Wally looked up at the top of the rock for a moment before glancing down at the still mildly gloomy looking sidekick hopefully. Richard smiled softly and nodded, unfolding his utility belt from its hiding spot and hooking it around his torso like a sash. He reached into a familiar pocket and pulled out his grappling hook. He aimed it up and held out his hand towards Wally.

The redhead grinned and took the pale hand in his own and let out a laugh as the hook locked into the side of the rock and they flew up at a fast speed. In a second, they were atop the rock. Richard took off the utility belt, unhooking the grappling hook and tucking it away carefully before refolding the utility belt and hiding it again. Wally set the box down, pulling out two big looking red pipes. Richard grinned and grabbed three of his own, setting them down on the rock's top, running back and flinging himself off the rock as Wally lit them with a lighter he had stored in his jean pocket. Then Wally dove after Richard, catching himself on a section of rock jutting out the side of the bigger rock to take cover from the firework blast.

The second they heard the hiss of the little rockets, they scrambled back on top of the rock and craned their necks to watch the fiery explosions consume the sky. For the first time that night, a bubbly giggle rose to Richard's lips, the explosion illuminating his excitement, all sorrow drowned from his mind for the moment. Wally glanced his way and his grin widened, allowing a soft laugh of his own spill over his light pink lips.

As the last of their first 5 fireworks went off, the fireworks over in Rhode Island took off, blinding the best friends in their colorful lights. Richard's giggle returned and he glanced Wally's way, surprised to catch the boy's gaze.

"Thanks KF," he said softly, his voice loud enough to be heard over the fireworks, but not enough for anyone but Wally to hear.

The redhead smiled curiously. "What for?"

Richard just grinned to himself and turned his eyes to the fireworks display in front of him. Wally decided not to probe; he just slipped an arm around his best friend's shoulders again.

"Anytime dude," he said calmly.

True, he wasn't in his mother's lap and his hand wasn't in his father's. Also true, he wasn't in a park in Gotham City. No, Richard Grayson was with his best friend on top of a rock at Mt. Justice in Happy Harbor, Rhode Island. And you know what? He was pretty happy.

[1] Credit to my dearest Emerald Lotus for that term in her story 'Ambushed'.

[2] South Park reference. A 'ginger' is a pale freckle faced super red haired child who, apparently, cannot go out in the sun. Wally's pretty tan and is like Kyle, the 'day-ginger'.

Liar, Liar by Christina Grimmie. Go Screw Yourself by Avery. Start Again by Sam Tsui. All are great songs. Thanks for reading I guess. Review?

-F.J.