A/N: This randomness comes from an equally random conversation with Kuraun Kuraun. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own DGM.

Allen was simply eating his breakfast one morning, after a long mission in which food had been moderately bland and not nearly as plentiful as one would find in the presence of Jerry. This is when the local red-headed maker of irritating situations decided to make him his newest target. Walking up behind the unsuspecting boy, Lavi deftly reached down and snatched the spoon from his hand. He took a step back with his prize, a wide grin spreading across his face.

Allen looked up, grays eyes widened in astonishment. Did his friend not know what meal it was? Out of all of his many feeding times breakfast was the most sacred of all! Without breakfast, life would crumble into a horrible oblivion of hunger. Not knowing what to say, Allen went with the usual, "What are you doing?"

"Stealing your spoon," Lavi replied calmly, not missing a beat, all the while grin still in place. He twirled the spoon in his fingers, taunting the younger boy who looked positively mournful at having his meal interrupted.

"Can I have it back?" said sad looking boy asked. "I need to finish so I can go start my mission report for Komui."

"No can do buddy," came the lazy reply. "You see, I too need a spoon."

"Then go get your own," growled Allen, getting irritated at his friends actions. All he wanted was to finish eating.

"But I want this spoon," whined Lavi, dangling the silver instrument from his fingers. "'Tis special."

"Oh, how so?" Allen sarcastically replied, glaring at the Exorcist. Now, most people would have taken this break in Allen protocol as a warning to knock it off and give the man his spoon back. But then again, this was Lavi; even the laws of physics need not apply.

"It was the, um…" Lavi paused to think for a moment. "It was the Queen's spoon!" he declared, waving it about like a sword.

Allen let out an irritated huff. "You made that up! You pulled that answer out of nowhere and you know it. Now give me my spoon!" he snarled. His porridge was getting cold and he had places to be.

"No can do my vertically challenged friend-" Allen's eye twitched at this remark, "-because it is my duty as a Bookman to record the data of this spoon." Lavi prayed Bookman wasn't around to hear him using the Bookman name in such a way.

Allen made a chocked noise. "Do you hear this?" he demanded of Link, whom at this point was trying to stay out of the argument and read his book.

With a quick glance away from the pages, he regarded them with dark eyes. "Yes, I hear "this"." he calmly replied.

Allen glared at the Inspector. "It's total nonsense, right?"

"Yes."

"Therefore I should get my spoon back, right?"

"Yes."

"Are you going to just say yes?"

"Yes."

"I hate you."

"I'm reporting you."

"Touché."

During this, Lavi had taken the initiative to sneak off, spoon in hand. He was almost across the cafeteria when Allen noticed. With a glare that would put Noah to shame, he activated Crown Belt and sent it after the spoon-thief.

Lavi yelped, dropping the spoon and sprinting for the door; the spoon hit the floor with a clatter. Allen froze, Crown Belt fluttering to the floor in defeat. His precious spoon….

"Walker?" asked Link, looking between the crushed boy and his spoon. "Why don't you just get a new one?"

At this, Allen perked up and raced to the counter. Link sighed at the sheer stupidity of the morning and went back to his book.